Bride and Prejudice: John / Mum
by tarskeewee08
John
looked at his mother and shook his head sadly "I'm not calling
off the wedding"
"Then we have nothing to talk about!" she
hissed turning and going to her vanity table and sitting down.
Staring at herself in the mirror she looked up to see John watching
her.
"Leave Johnny…I have nothing to say to you"
"Well
I have plenty to say to you and this time it's about us, no one
else"
Eve frowned and turned around "Us?"
"Remember
when I was seven years old at St. Andrews Christian Academy"
"Yes…" she said confused
"We were having a Easter play
on the crucifixion and resurrection of Christ and you felt I should
play Jesus."
Eve turned completely around on her stool and looked at her son confused as to why he was bringing this up to her now. "Go on…"
"I didn't want to play Christ mum, I wanted to be one of the disciples with my friends but you were insistent that I try out for the part. Well I did what you asked and I stunk, bloody hell I was the worst of them all. Peter McDuley was the kid that did the best. Everyone in the class knew it."
"John why are you bringing this up?"
"Listen to me dammit!" he snapped "I was horrible but you felt because I was a McBain I should have the lead. You forced that teacher to make me Christ. All the kids hated me and called my names after that. That day forward I was no longer John, I was John Thomas McBain. Do you know what that did to me!"
"John….I"
"No mum, for years you
have controlled and directed the course of my life. The friends I
had, the sports I played, the clothes I wore, the woman I bed all
were under your control"
"That's not true John, I never tried to control you"
"God mum, you just won't quit. Even now sitting there demanding I call off my wedding you claim you never tried to control me?"
Eve eyes teared up "John its just that…"
"Its what? Tell me! Because either you are the cold heartless snobbish bitch that everyone in this city thinks you are….or there is something else that drives you to push and bully your family the way you do! I want to understand. I want to know why you do the horrible manipulative things you do."
Eve
wiped at the tears that fell "Why are you doing this?"
"Because
I want to be free of you! As much as I love you and want your love in
return, I can't live like this anymore!"
"You want to
toss me away like yesterdays garbage for that woman?"
"This is
not about her! Have you been listening? Before there was an
Evangeline you were orchestrating every aspect of my life. I haven't
had the chance to be just me, your son Johnny."
Eve stood up "Cut this crap John. You are a grown man! Here you stand talking about being seven years old and some play I forced you in. Grow the hell up. This isn't about you…our family is bigger than just you!"
John looked at his mother hurt "Stop hiding behind our family mum and face me, your son. This is your only chance to really face what's wrong with us."
"I'll tell you what's wrong. You're spoiled. You stand here and whine about being rich and privileged but I watch you for year over indulge in those privileges. Throwing lavish parties and sleeping with American harlots only to toss them aside liked damaged goods. Then the way you treated sweet Caitlyn…ignoring her and leaving her to go off with your friends. Making her pine away for you with no return of your affections!"
"Shut up!" John shouted covering his ears.
"Shut up? No you wanted to talk so here it is. Twice you ran from women baring your children, and twice the good lord struck those women down robbing you of your heirs! Now you bring that cursed woman into my home and think you have changed! Well I say you are still the same spoiled…"
"Shut up!" John roared getting into Eve's face.
Eve stepped back shocked at the rage on his face. John was so angry he trembled with hatred for her at that moment. "The blood from both those relationships is on both of our hands dear mother!" he hissed
Eve shook her head no. "I wasn't responsible!"
"Yes you were. See mom three years ago I found out the truth. Ran into Clifford, you remember Clifford don't you Caitlyn's obgyn? Funny when Caitlyn died you handled everything. I barely got the cause of death. But Clifford had no problem clueing me in…"
"John I can explain" Eve said shocked eyes wide with guilt.
"Explain? Explain what mum? Explain that Caitlyn shouldn't have had kids. You kept the dangers of her baring a child from me. You convinced her it was her only chance to keep me you heartless old crow! Oh and then the best part is that after Caitlyn was dead you turn to Carla? She was even easier wasn't she mum? I mean the woman is a walking basket case yet you played into her obsessive tendencies making me her focus. Then you want to sit there and blame me?"
Eve openly crying shook her head sadly "I loved Caitlyn John, I honestly didn't think she would die. Women have problems with child bearing….she had the best of doctors"
"And those same doctors told you both that there was a 70 chance of dying with her condition but you kept that from me! You let me walk around and blame myself! What is wrong with you?"
Eve went to her son. "John I'm just trying to be a good mother. I'm just helping you fulfill your destiny!"
"And look at how wonderful of a job you've
done!" he said sarcastically.
"John, son…I am your mother. I
will always be your mother"
"That's the most tragic part. I
love you still because you are my mother. But I am now doing what's
necessary to love me. That starts right here and right now."
"I won't accept her John" Eve said crying looking at her son pleadingly "I will never accept that woman"
"Then you
won't have me or my kids in your life"
"You will have kids
with her?"
"Mum, it's up to you….live here isolated from
your family and what we could have together or step out and face your
prejudices. Get to know Evangeline and Marcie they are your daughter
in-laws and remarkable women"
"NO!" Eve shouted turning from him.
"After all the things you've done. After the horrible outcome of your constant interference you still won't let go of your bitterness. I can't believe who you really are. I can't believe that me and Mike got saddled with someone as heartless and cruel as you for a parent. I don't know why I even bothered!"
"John please! I love you….your my baby boy."
John looked at her sadly, she rarely if ever said the word love to him. Now after this conversation hearing the words have no affect.
He actually thought that if he came in here and told her why being her son was painful for him they would come to some understanding. But she wasn't receptive to that. She wasn't going to change.
"There's nothing left to be said between us mum and for that I am really sorry, because despite the horrible things you have done in your quest to protect your family you've driven us all further away from you."
Eve turned to say something but John went to the door and stepped out of it. His heart was shattered, because he knew in this moment he had to let his mother go. Walking down the hall he turned to the wing his room was on. It was dinner time but he couldn't join them. Not now.
John opened the door to his darkened room and went to the chaise chair in the corner plopping down. He thought of his childhood up to adulthood and the manipulations of his mother. Finding out that Caitlyn's death could have been prevented was more than he could bare, but knowing his mother still felt no responsibility over it sickened him. Staring into the dark he thought of how his life would need to be going forward. He wouldn't raise his kids around her. He didn't want any of her influence with his children.
He didn't want to be married here, as a matter of fact when he left he would never return. It was time as his mother said that he grow up. He should grow up and let go of the past. That started here and now. The door to his room slowly opened and Evangeline came inside looking for him.
She didn't see him at first and was set to leave until he
spoke "Hey sunshine…."
Turning she saw him in the far corner
to her left and jumped "John? Why are you sitting here in the dark
sweetie?"
John said nothing and she closed the door. Walking over to him she knelt in front of him seeing the dazed look on his face. "Baby are you okay?" she asked moving his hair from his face.
He looked at her and smiled weakly. "I am now that
you're here"
Evangeline put her arms around his neck and
hugged him. He hugged her back smelling her shampoo and rubbing his
face against her silky hair. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine
baby really I am" he said letting her go.
"What happened?"
"I
told my mother some things and she told me some things."
"Did
you reach each other?"
"No but I understand my pain much
better now. My relationship with her is over and that hurts, but I
have a whole new future and that's enough!"
Evangeline smiled "That's right baby we are more than enough"
"Speaking of a new start I have a perfect idea."
Evangeline looked at him curious "You do?"
"Yes we're getting married in our Fitzgerald Castle in Cambridge. We can fix it up and clear out the grounds to make it beautiful"
Evangeline eyes sparkled and her smile grew "Oh god that is a wonderful idea!" she said leaping into his arms. John laughed at her joy and pulled her from the floor so she could sit on his lap. Kissing her chest that was exposed from her opening in her shirt he warmed up under her happiness. "I love my mum I do, but I learned today that sometimes the best way to protect the love of your family is to put distance between you and them. I can't do this anymore Van. My freedom and independence starts with me. I'm leaving this castle and all the pretension behind. We have our own life to lead"
Evangeline
touched his face. "I love you John Thomas!"
John grinned at
her "I love you Ms. Thomas!"
Thomas walked into his wife's room to see her on her knees at the side of her bed praying and crying. He listened as she asked the lord for forgiveness and strength. She prayed that he drove that wicked woman from her son's life and brought him back to her. Thomas shook his head and closed the door.
Eve looked up immediately. "What are you doing here Thomas!" she said rising and pulling her robe closed.
"We need to talk Evie"
"Get out….you
should have knocked before coming into my room!" she snapped. Eve
and her husband hadn't shared a room in almost 10 years. The few
times he was allowed into her bed were by invitation only. She glared
at her husband still angry for the way he spoke to her
yesterday.
"You will loose them both Evie…you do know that
don't you"
"Johnny will come around and Mikey is already
lost to me!"
"Evie…"
"Stop calling me that and get
out!"
"They are your sons, don't you want to be a part of
their lives?"
She shook her head "NO! not this way….this is so wrong"
Thomas saw the pain on his wife's face and knew the truth, she didn't hate those girls….she hated herself. She was trapped in her own misery and desperate to control her happiness. She thought happiness would be controlling her boys.
"Have you held your grand daughter?"
Eve cut her
eyes and turned from her husband. With her back to him she began to
cry as she chewed on her lip to keep him from hearing her
whimper.
"Chelsea has your father's eyes. She's a gem Evie…don't do this. Don't miss out on the best part. You have so much more to offer than this"
"Just go Tom"
Thomas walked over to his wife and put his hand on her shoulder feeling her stiffen. "Johnny is your baby boy. I remember how when he was born you stayed up for two days to watch him sleep afraid he would stop breathing."
Eve dropped her head and her body shook with tears. Thomas rubbed her shoulder and arm. "I remember his first day at St. Andrews how you sat from the limo and watched him on the play ground afraid he would need you. Or that play he was in where he was horrible and how many photographers you had around taking his picture and the friends you invited to see our boy. I know the real you Evie and you need to show it to our sons"
"I can't, I'm a horrible mother. The things I've done Tom."
Thomas pulled his weeping wife into his arms. "You've done them all because you love them. They were wrong and horrible but it's up to you to make them right."
"Oh god!" she said wrapping her arms around her husband. Thomas held onto her and let her cry it out. He wanted his wife back and this was their start.
