Chapter 3: To be or Not To be
The Stark family all stood in attendance, to bid farewell to Brandon, Eddard and Rickard. The day had finally dawned, on which the two boys would leave Winterfell and foster with another house. Rickard had arranged for Brandon to foster in Barrowton with Lord Dustin. Since the continuation of evening meals together, Rickard was relieved to see Brandon settling. He could only pray Brandon would continue such behavior. Lord Arryn had approved of Eddard's fostering and they would journey together before splitting ways.
Rickard could see that his eldest sons were no longer boys but men in the making and it pleased him. His keen eyes observed his children say their farewell's to one another. One by one he took note of their potential and pondered on what changes the time spent apart would bring. By the time his sons would return they would be men, and their sisters would be ladies. He could only hope the distance did not weaken the bonds between them.
Lyanna was furious and she made no attempts at hiding her temper. She openly glared at her father and had taken to ignoring her brothers. Only now the time to leave had come and Ned grew desperate in trying to get her to speak to him.
"Come now Lya, I don't want to leave you without hearing your voice" He begged
"Leave her Ned, if she wants to be stubborn then let her. She'd regret it when you're gone" Brandon scoffed as he saddled his horse.
"Perhaps if we ask Father-"
"You heard him. The roads are dangerous and there must always be a Stark in Winterfell. Benjen is still a babe"
Lyanna switched her glare to Brandon and pushed him as hard as she could. He stumbled and his horse startled out of his grip. Hastily calming the animal, he immediately glared at his sister. Brandon's glare only faltered when he saw the angry tears in her eyes.
"It's not fair! Why must father send you both away!? Why can't we at least ride with you!?"
To Lyanna, it was still too soon. By now four months had passed since their mother's death. She knew that their Father had already delayed the trip but still. She was not ready to say goodbye to her brothers. How was she and Anya supposed to stay in Winterfell without them? Brandon would be gone, and now she'd never learn to fight with a sword for certain. Ned would be too far in the South to help her sneak from lessons. It simply wasn't fair.
"Will you write us?" Anya asked
Lyanna stared at her sister with betrayal in her eyes. Anya's practiced mask was a lot better now, especially for her young age. Only her eyes still betrayed her thoughts and feelings. Lyanna hated Anya's blank face and how different Anya had become. She no longer laughed, smiled or did anything fun. Her little sister had become obsessed with lessons and studies.
"Aren't you angry! Father is sending them away." Lyanna demanded, unable to understand.
"They'll be coming back though."
"We won't see them for years!"
"Father said we could visit"
"But Ned will be in the South, that's too far!"
"Father said-"
"FATHER'S WRONG! Ned will be alone and surrounded by Southerners. He won't have any Northerner friends to help him. It's wrong, It's ALL WRONG. They should be here, at Winterfell. In Winterfell it's safe and then they wouldn't have to leave home at all!"
Lyanna panted heavily after her outburst before flinging herself into Ned's arms and hugging him tight. Benjen squirmed in Anya's hold, as she tightened her grip. Her eyes revealed that she agreed with Lyanna's words but trusted their father's decisions. Benjen whimpered Anya's name, uncomfortable at how tight she held him. She only released him when Brandon placed a hand on her shoulder and ruffled Benjen's hair.
"By the God's Lya, we're not being banished. We're leaving to train and become stronger. Ned's hardly going to become a southern bastard just because he fosters there. Besides, you and Anya will be so busy learning to be a lady, you won't even notice we'd be gone"
"Your wrong." "I'm not a Lady" the sister's denied but Lyanna was no longer on the verge of crying and that was all that mattered.
"Bran's right you know." Ned added, pulling back so he could look Lyanna in the eyes.
"And when we both get back, we'll teach you everything we learned."
"You swear it?"
"Aye, I swear."
Rickard decided it'd been long enough, clearing his throat he made his presence known. Lyanna no longer glared at him, a fact that relieved him. Instead she hugged him just as fiercely as her brothers. Whilst she did as such, Anya approached her brothers, with Benjen in her arms.
"You never said you'd write" she accused softly as Brandon played with Benjen one last time.
"Will you not smile for your brothers, little sister?" Brandon interjected instead.
It'd become a sort of game for him. Ever since her smiles and laughter had ceased, Brandon teased her often. He held hopes that she'd give him one, even just a small one, before he left. He hated the practiced mask she wore, and was irritated Ned didn't feel the same. Little sister's were not supposed to look so stern, not when they should be having fun.
"My brothers are leaving, why would I smile?"
Before Brandon could reply, Ned elbowed him in the stomach, hard. Yelping and glaring at his brother, Ned took that time to say his own goodbyes. Anya didn't laugh or smile like she would have before their Mother's death. But Ned only needed to look at her eyes to feel as if she had. Brandon simply never took the time to notice.
"We'll write you as often as we can"
As the travelling party left and they lost sight of them from the gates, the remaining Stark siblings separated. Lyanna stormed off wanting to be alone to stew in anger whilst Anya stayed standing with Benjen at her side. Anya didn't know what she was waiting for, but she felt no need to move. It wasn't long before Benjen tugged at her skirts and questioned what she was looking for. Without anyone near, no one saw how Anya's lips twitched and her eyes softened. None but young Benjen, who had no idea how rarely his sister gave such an expression.
"Nothing, just Bran being foolish again. Come, let us get you dressed for the evening meal."
~*~*~Winter Storm Queen~*~*~
The sister's soon realized that despite their Father and brother's absence, life in Winterfell continued. Lyanna had managed to excuse herself from lessons for an entire week before her excuse failed. Many had decided a week of grieving Bran and Ned's absence was long enough. In contrast, Anya dedicated herself to every lesson with a work ethic that many approved off. So much so her teacher's found themselves forcing the child to take breaks and restricting her studies. It was very clear to the people of Winterfell, that the Stark sister's were ever so different.
"Argh! That stupid shit head" Lyanna raged before slamming her sister's chamber door.
Anya ignored the outburst and continued her writings. Never once looking up as Lyanna, collapsed onto her bedding despite her muddied breeches and tunic. The clothing belonged to Ned. Lyanna had stolen several clothing pieces from both brothers, for the both of them. They made sure to hide them, just in case the Handmaids discovered them and threw them away.
"If I'd my own sword I'd shut his filthy mouth. I ride a horse better than he could ever wish"
"Mmh…"
Lyanna sat upright and glared distantly as she thought of the boy who angered her. Another squire boy too scared to fight her truly. It had become routine for Lyanna to seek Anya and vent her frustration or anger. Finding Anya was never an issue for Lyanna, especially on days where Anya had been restricted.
"I'm better with a sword then him anyway and I've never been properly trained."
Anya nodded but still had yet to stop her writings.
"How dare he say I go back to practicing needle point!"
"He's not exactly wrong. You're now 6 days behind in your stitching. If you don't work on it now, you're never going to finish it in time for Benjen's name-day feast."
Anya only muttered her words, but Lyanna heard them all the same. The older Stark daughter glared at the younger, hard enough it caused Anya to look up. Another thing that irked Lyanna about her sister, she was never on her side. The sisters stared at each other, one glaring the other irritated with the distraction.
"What is it now, Lya?"
"What do you mean!? You're the one being a bore. You aren't even supposed to be studying anymore. How can you just sit here and study all the time? You should want to learn to fight too!"
Anya frowned, pushing away from her writings and giving her sister, her full attention. Rickard had expressively declared that training with the sword will not be allowed for either sister during his absence. He ensured all of his banner-men and every maid and servant knew so. None were willing to disobey because the consequences would be heavy. Lyanna knew this and yet she still went out of her way to try and train with the squire boys.
"Of course I wish to learn the ways of the sword. But you heard father's orders! I'm simply not willing to risk someone else getting punished or receiving his anger for disobedience. I have every intention of asking him again when he returns."
"If he won't give it now, why would he give it then?"
"I don't know, perhaps he had a change of thought whilst riding? Can't you ever just trust that father knows what's best?"
Lyanna scoffed, kicking at the wooden stand, earning a narrow glare from Anya. She ignored the glare and continued to dirty her younger sister's room.
"It's clear Father doesn't trust us, so why should I trust him to know what's best. If he knew me at all he'd know that I'm no lady. If I'm going to be anything in this world, It's going to be a knight or sworn shield. I swear it!"
Anya hid a small smirk at her sister's words. It was the closest thing to a smile she could muster. Though many a time, she agonized and disagreed with Lyanna's behavior. She was in truth proud of her sister's goals. To Anya, her older sister was the bravest of the brave and she admired her strength. Lyanna never hesitated to fight for what she wanted. Since they were babes it has always been as so. She had no doubt that Lyanna would be a fierce leader and believed one day, she would fight wars and win victoriously. Lyanna was her older sister, and like some younger siblings do, Anya admired her greatly.
"You shouldn't swear such things so easily, Lya. The gods may hear and consider it promised. What will you do if you break it? You may be punished." Anya cautioned, partially as a jape but also seriously.
"I'd brave my punishment, I'm no craven!" Lyanna proudly announced, with her head held high.
"Mmh, surely not." Anya drawled
The sisters glared at each other before breaking into a soft giggle and loud laughter. Lyanna's laughter stopped immediately when she heard her sister's giggles. Staring at her sister with wide eyes, both happy and sad. Lyanna had almost forgotten what Anya looked like without her stupid mask in play. She missed the giggles and shy demeanor Anya used to have. It was why Lyanna had always been so willing to fight and defend. To Lyanna, as Anya's older sister, she had to protect her from the worst of men who would wish to ruin her sweet sister. It was why Lyanna wished to learn the ways of the sword. For men only listened when a sword was held to their necks.
"What will you be then?" Lyanna blurted, breaking the silence that fell.
Anya looked at her sister with a questioning expression. She'd turned to continue her writings only to pause once more. Lyanna sat back on the bed and folded her legs, sitting most improperly. Anya winced at seeing more mud transfer from her sister's boots to her sheets. She had no time to comment because Lyanna began to elaborate.
"I'm to be a Knight or sworn sheild, what do you choose to be?"
Anya pursed her lips in thought, idly playing with her writing scrolls. The younger Stark sister had not thought much on what she wanted to be. She'd simply drowned herself in studies to forget the pain of losing their mother and ease her father's worries.
Before their mother died, Anya had fancied being just like Lyanna. Eager to be a brave, strong knight who fought with swords and won battles and wars. She at times wanted to be just like her mother, a fair lady with cunning smarts hidden behind beauty and smiles. There were even times she wished to be like Brandon, wild like Northern winds, Ned, silent but always present to support and her Father. Most of all Anya looked up to her Father, and she had recently been doing her best to be most like him.
Only….
Anya found, she could never be just like her father. He was wiser, smarter and had lost so much. He was only half a man without their mother and a broken shell of the papa she used to know. To be her father meant to love someone like he did her mother and she could not. She studied and attended lessons enough to know that her marriage will likely be political and with a stranger.
And now, Anya had no idea on what she wished to be….
"Anya? Surely you must wish to be something!?" Lyanna prompted.
She'd grown concerned with how long Anya was taking to speak. Her worries ceased when Anya looked at her and smiled a small but there smile. Lyanna marveled at how the expression changed everything about her little sister. It was nothing grand, or something to sing songs about, but it held confidence that she'd never seen in Anya.
"I will be whatever is needed."
Lyanna furrowed her brows, confused as to what Anya meant.
"What does that mean?"
"It means, simply that and if you don't get it, then you can simply wait and see" Anya dismissed before turning back to her writings. Lyanna fell into another rant about Anya and her 'mysterious' words. Too caught up in doing so, she never heard the door opening and the Handmaid coming to check on Anya. Safe to say Lyanna was dragged back to her stitching and Anya was ushered out so the servants could clean the mess Lyanna had made in her chambers.
With nothing to do, having finished her lessons for the day and restricted from the library, Anya sought Benjen. She took the time to think over her conversation with Lyanna and her own response. Lyanna's wishes to be a knight was nothing new. Anya had expected as such, but she surprised herself with her own answer.
To be whatever is needed, had various implications. She worried if she'd been too bold in stating such a thing. The doubts swirled briefly in her mind before she stubbornly dismissed it. Firmly she repeated to herself, her decision.
She will be whatever is needed. For her family, For the North, For Winterfell. It did not matter what she would need to become, she will do it. A sword, A sheild, Lady, Spy or even a Begger.
Regardless she will become it.
They were only children, but that moment sealed the fate awaiting the Stark sisters. Only the gods would ever know what was said and sworn in Anya Starks bedchamber. For the gods are always listening and watching, even if many claim they are not. The Stark sister's will go down in history and many songs and stories will tell of their legacy. One would ignite a war another would become Queen but all will remember... just as the North always do.
