Chapter 37 - Agreement
Lex didn't improve over the next few days.
His mom kept a watchful eye on him, bringing him tea and soup and water and medicine and comfort. But while some hours were better than others, the overall trend was for the worse.
More concerning than the illness itself were the reports he got from his doctor. Apparently, there was nothing wrong with him.
His mom was outraged when he bought her the news. "Nothing wrong?" She threw up her hands. "You've never been sick in your life, and now it's like you've got the cold and flu and pneumonia all at once, and there's nothing wrong with you?"
"I'm sure it will clear up soon enough," Lex said. "Don't worry about me. I have a good immune system."
But it didn't clear up. It only got worse. Within a couple of weeks, an entire three days passed in which Lex couldn't get down the stairs at all.
Clark offered to carry him. But Lex always turned down that offer. Things were a little better between him and his brother these days; Clark was spending more time at home, and now that Lex was physically incapable of running off to kill his other self, Clark was also more honest about what was going on during his visits. Lex got to hear amazing stories about the fortress, about Krypton. He still wished he could be there, but from the sound of it, his other side was deteriorating, too.
When Clark reported that his darker side had gone to the hospital—or rather, had brought the hospital staff to himself, by the sound of it—Lex's mom finally insisted that he ask for more tests.
"To be safe," she said. "You've never been sick. We don't know what this is."
He wanted to say that maybe this was for the best. That if he died, the other side would quietly die as well. But his head was pounding, and he really didn't want his ear tugged, no matter how gently. And besides, if there was something that could cure him, now was a good time. It was November; if he was going to live, he didn't really want to spend the holidays in the hospital. That would just make his whole family miserable.
So in the end, Lex had to give in to Clark's offers to help him around, just to get him down to the driver who would take him to the emergency room.
The test reports he received the next day were even more concerning. Lex didn't want to bring his parents into it, but there was no way he could lie to them.
Nothing could have prepared him for the look of shock on his dad's face when he told the news at the dinner table. "You're dying?"
"Unless we can figure out why, yes."
"But… How can you just be dying? Of nothing?"
"She said the closest thing she had seen was in patients dying of old age."
"You're dying of old age at 24."
Some days he felt old enough to be dying of age. He didn't say that, though.
"But..." His dad shook his head. "What are we supposed to do about it?"
Lex looked up at his mom. She looked concerned, and sad, but she wasn't panicked like his dad was.
Maybe she suspected what he suspected.
"I know what you're thinking," Lex said.
"It's worth a try," she said.
"He won't agree to it. And even if he would, I don't know which of us is stronger."
"You've said that we make you stronger."
"And I've had a lot of time with you. I know. But…"
"You think by now he would have started doubting his convictions." Mom looked up at Clark. "How has he been doing?"
"Sick," Clark said hesitantly. "Lex, what is this about?"
"Does he still… believe he's incapable of love?" Mom asked.
"He doesn't believe I care about him, if that's what you're asking."
"Martha?" their dad asked. "What are you saying? Do you know what's wrong with him?"
"I think no one could survive with half a soul for long," she said.
"It doesn't make sense," Lex told her. "A soul isn't physical. It can't be affecting my health."
"Wait, wait." Clark looked from Mom to Lex. "This is my fault?"
"You couldn't have known," Lex said, then he corrected himself. "No! It's not related, Mom."
"I'm guessing your other half suspects the same thing I do."
"I don't care what he has to say."
"He's dying like you are."
"Good!"
The room was quiet for a moment.
"Lex," his mom chided quietly.
"Don't."
"You have to."
"I can't. I can't."
"Lex..."
He swallowed hard. She was going to make him.
"What?" His dad looked at his mom. "What's happening?"
Lex licked his lips. "She thinks the only way to save me is to have us re-merge."
"No!" Clark said.
Lex's mom reached for his hand. "Sweetie, just think about it. Just think."
He pulled his hand away. "I'm not talking to that monster again, let alone let him..." He shoved himself back from the table, head spinning. "I-I don't know if I can kill him from the inside."
"Maybe you shouldn't," she said softly.
"Come on, Mom, what are you saying?"
"He's not all evil, Lex," Clark said. "I've met him."
"I've had the bastard in my head!" Lex looked to his father desperately. "Come on, where's that famous Kent prejudice now? You made me prove myself to you a thousand times, and you're giving him a chance, sight unseen?"
Pain flashed across his father's face, and for a split second, Lex regretted saying it.
"I was wrong all those years, son," his dad said.
"Great. That's just..." Lex pulled himself to stand. He made it as far as the kitchen counter before he had to lean against it, resting.
A moment later, he felt a warm hand on his arm. He turned, and his father pulled him in tight.
Lex held on for a moment before letting go, but this time his father wasn't. Finally, he had to relax, resolving himself to stay. The strength and comfort wore on him now. He needed his family to be less sympathetic, to protect themselves and each other. "Dad," Lex said.
His dad let go and looked him in the eyes. "You listen to me, son, because once again, it might be a little while before you hear this."
Lex felt his eyes starting to sting.
"We love you. All of you. You're strong and capable. You're a good man."
Lex nodded. "Yes, sir," he made himself say.
"Come home whole."
Lex swallowed.
Clark stood and came over to him. "We should go now. You're getting worse by the day."
Lex took a deep breath. His mom came over and gave him one last long hug. "He used to wear you down with hateful words, didn't he?" she asked as she held him.
"Yeah," he said.
"Wear him down with love."
"Mom..."
"It's the only way."
He gritted his teeth.
She reached up to kiss him on the cheek. As soon as she'd let go, Lex nodded to Clark.
Clark wrapped his arms around Lex, and they were off.
Lex managed to convince Clark to wait nearby after he showed him where the darkness was. "Use your super hearing if it makes you feel better," he'd told him. "But I need to do this alone."
Surprisingly, Clark seemed to understand that. He gave Lex a little nod and let him go inside.
The darkness looked every bit as bad as Lex felt. He was reclining on the couch when Lex came in, and he pulled himself to stand and walk over to a cabinet. "Finally. You're here. We can begin."
Lex stepped back. He hadn't come armed. He had half expected his dark side to take out a weapon, but what he brought out was a piece of black kryptonite and a generator.
He set it down on the table. "Ready?"
Lex blinked. "How did you know?"
"I'd sooner die than share a body with you again. Well, that was, until I was dying." He gestured with his head. "Come on."
"Wait."
The darkness stood up straight. "We don't have much time."
Lex took a step closer. "Who takes the wheel when we're back in one piece?"
His darkness looked up at him in amusement. "The stronger one, obviously." He took a seat.
Lex sat across from him. "I want to know if the Kents were right about you."
He snorted. "Don't tell me Clark was serious all this time."
"They think you still want a place in their family."
The darkness's jaw pulsed. "You really think that's a picture I fit into?"
Lex didn't say anything.
"Pathetic, is what it is. All you're doing is giving your enemies leverage. Not to mention compromising your own mind. The Kents make you soft, they distract you, they hold you back. They lie to you, and they try to control you. No." He shook his head. "That's the last thing I want."
Lex looked down. His mom had been right. Those weren't the protests of a man who believed what he was saying. His other side wanted what he had and believed he couldn't have it, and it was tearing him apart. Making him into a monster.
And it gave him an idea.
"Let's find out," Lex said.
His darkness blinked. "Find out what?"
"Whether they're lying."
He raised his eyebrows.
"Why leave dominance to chance? We can have it out. Find out who's right."
"What do you propose?"
"We test Jonathan Kent. He's made promises to us."
"To you."
"That's where we disagree." Lex looked down. This would work. It would set things right, once and for all. "Take control. I won't fight you. You go talk to Jonathan Kent, you say whatever you want to say."
"And?"
"If he keeps his promises, if he doesn't hit you or kick you out—"
"I have to give you control."
"Yes."
The dark side considered. "How long a conversation are we talking?"
"Let's call it ten minutes."
"And I can say anything?"
"Within parameters. No direct threats, and you can't kick yourself out. He'd let you go if you asked."
"I just have to anger the man who already has anger issues, enough to make him lose his temper, and you'll lie down and admit defeat?"
"If that happens, you'll have proven me wrong. I won't have a choice."
"Ten minutes is generous. I don't think I'll need five."
Lex smiled. "Take all ten. I think you underestimate him."
His darkness shrugged. "I guess we'll find out."
"Is that a deal?" Lex could feel his heart pounding hard, but at the end of the day, he believed in his father.
The dark side picked up the black Kryptonite. "Shake on it."
Lex grasped his hand, bracing himself, and the darkness turned on the generator.
A/N: This has been a very challenging plot arc to write. If you're with me and still reading, I would love to hear your thoughts!
