Alex: We got a lot of new reviews from new people- Roxie: Wasn't that our goal to get the people who have been reading and not reviewing to review? Alex: Yeah and I was going to say thank you to all the people who did just that. Reviewed. Roxie: Oh please continue.
XXcatsXxxXmooXx: Yeah I kinda made Yuki look evil in the last chap. Well all I can say is that it will get a lot worst before it gets any better.
no end to love: Yeah Yuki threw Shuichi out I had to do it sooner or later. But we all knew it would come. Anyway the wait is over and I think that you will enjoy this chap as well.
sansty-san: Hangs head low and mummers almost inaudibly Roxie ate my cookie. But I'm past that. Aside: murder will be committed for the stolen cookie. laughs I hope you enjoy the rest of the story.
Dejichan4444: Yeah Yuki could stand to be a little nicer.
DemonicDragon666: Yeah everyone's told me that the ending was sad but you ain't seen nothing yet.
Red Kitsune Flames: Poor Shuichi but unfortunately things are going to get a lot worst for him.
Vipergirl: Yeah hopefully no more computer problems I needed to get that chap to you guys immediately.
DarkMetalAngel of Destruction: I cant say that Yuki will be condemned to darkness but something of that sort.
Makkura Arashi: Don't worry about the delay it's cool. Things are definitely starting to warm up and they will stay like that for a while. Yeah Yuki does have his issues and I didn't understand why he had to give Shuichi hell also. Well, I can only say that Yuki will regret it all sooner or later. Thanks for leaving me out of the jerk category greatly appreciated. Roxie: I wouldn't go as far to say that your not a jerk. Alex: Yeah maybe to you because you deserve it. sticks tongue out
tammy-love: Some of your questions will be answered in this chap that's all I can say. After all I don't want to give too much away.
Roxie: Oh one last thing:
Flashback- "----------------------------------------------------------"
Present (change or POV change)-
.Chapter 4.
Yuki's POV
I lit another cigarette, my tenth one in thirty minutes. The apartment was quiet for the first time since Shuichi moved in. I sighed again taking in more of the smoke from the cigarette that was nearing its end. My eyes were heavy with sleep but my body wouldn't allow sleep to come. It's as if my body was torturing me keeping me awake as if to suffer from the pain I put Shuichi through. "I deserve it...and more." I said aloud to no one. The silence responded. I dropped the cigarette in the ashtray with the numerous others and curled myself into a ball on the couch. I didn't want to go back to the bed it would only serve to fill my head with more memories of that brat. No…of Shuichi. So I stayed on the couch staring into the darkness. The phone rang snapping me out of my monotonous gaze. Not bothering to ask who it is I answer the phone and yell Shuichi's name.
"Sorry Eiri but its only me Tohma."
I sighed. This was going to be a long night.
"Just come over….I'll tell you everything." I replied hanging up the phone not waiting for Tohma's reply.
I laid back in the chair deciding to rest my eyes before Tohma came over.
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Pain coursed though my body as I struggled to regain consciousness. This wasn't how it was supposed to happen. Not like this. Not by force. I dreamt of this day when Yuki would finally take me in his arms and sweep me away from everything, but dreams don't come true. As I looked at the two men who advance toward me I couldn't help but feel fear but something else was there. It was stronger than the fear….was it hate? Did I hate Yuki for doing this to me? Robbing me of my innocence and letting these men have their way with me while watching; smirking to himself enjoying my pain and suffering. Yes. I hated him. I hated him with every fiber of my being. He took advantage of me of my feelings for him. I hated Kitazawa Yuki. He betrayed me.
"You betrayed me." I whispered. "You betrayed me…."
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"Eiri wake up." Tohma said as he shook me softly.
I opened my eyes realizing that it was just another nightmare and I was back home.
"Eiri what's wrong? You look distraught." He said gabbing me and placing my head on his chest.
I laid on his chest letting the sound of his heart soothe and calm me. "They, the dreams are coming back." I said my voice quivering from lack of oxygen and the impending tears threatening to fall. "I can't….stop them." I said finally letting the tears fall from my eyes. I hated crying. It hurt my head afterwards and it reminded me of Shuichi. I disentangled myself from Tohma's embrace and looked at him in the eyes. "I kicked Shuichi out because I didn't want him to see me like this. I said bad things to him, hurtful things. He probably hates me now." Tohma looked at me concern and worry evident on his face. But I also could tell that he was just as lost as me. I laid my head on his lap and closed my eyes.
"Eiri tell me about the nightmares." Tohma said softly. I nodded my head yes and began to tell him about the nightmares. ( Roxie: We're going to skip this part I'm sure you all don't want to hear it again).
Tohma looked at me with horror and sadness. I could tell he was at lost for words. It didn't matter nothing that he could say would stop the nightmares or make me feel any better. I just wanted it to be over. I would never be rid of these nightmares no matter what I did. They would just keep coming back until they finally destroyed me. And all I wanted was to give in. Let him win. I sat up from Tohma's lap and grabbed the pack of cigarettes that sat on the table in front of me. I grabbed a cigarette and lit it inhaling it deeply letting it calm me somewhat.
"You should really try to kick that habit." Tohma said breaking the silence.
I looked at him then turned my attention back to the cigarette.
"Look Eiri I know that nothing that I say will help you, or stop the dreams but I'm here for you as a friend for support. We'll find some way to stop this Eiri. I promise."
Tohma hugged me once more and stood up. "Look Eiri I know that you don't want to tell Shuichi but-"
"No!" I said abruptly cutting Tohma off in mid sentence. "Shuichi mustn't know no matter what. I don't want to drag him into my past. It'll hurt him more than I ever can."
"But Eiri your hurting him now. From what you told me he thinks you don't love him anymore."
"I do love him!" I yelled at Tohma. "I'm doing this because I love him. If he knew about my past, that I killed those men, he wouldn't trust me anymore. He wouldn't love me anymore. How could anyone hate a murderer?" Tears stung the side of my eyes but I fought them not wanting to show anymore weakness.
"Eiri I….I'm sorry. I wont tell Shuichi anything but sooner or later he will find out and he will hate you for not telling him sooner. I have to go but if you want me to stay-"
"Leave if you want." I intercepted.
Tohma said 'goodbye' and walked out the door shutting it behind him. I stared at the door for a while before laying back on the sofa and finally drifting into a deep slumber.
Shuichi's POV
I cried nonstop since I entered Hiro's apartment. How could Yuki throw me out so coldly? Did I do something wrong? I know I can be a little annoying sometimes but I can't help it. This wasn't like any other time he would kick me out, somehow this time it seemed final and that thought alone intensified my pain and tears began to flow more rapidly. This cant be the end. Yuki loves me too much even if he doesn't say it, I know he does. I wanted to call Yuki to apologize for whatever I did wrong and beg for him to take me back but every time I grabbed the phone I couldn't bring myself to dial the number. I didn't know what to say and I didn't know what reaction I would get from him. I had so many questions and not one answer.
A knock sounded at the distracting me from my thoughts. I wiped my the tears with the sleeve of my shirt. "Come in."
Hiro peeked his head around the door and attempted to smile. "Are you feeling better?"
I shook my head softly turning my back on him. "It hurts Hiro. It hurt to talk, it hurts to breathe." Tears began to fall from my eyes again. I didn't care anymore I deserve the right to cry. Hiro walked closer and placed a hand on my shoulder turning me around to face him.
"Shuichi its ok to cry. He hurt you and its ok to cry." he whispered pulling me into a warm embrace. I cried into his shirt dampening it with my tears. He just continued to hold me. After a while and more tears, I break apart from him and look into his eyes. He really wanted to help me and it was tearing him up inside seeing me like this. Hurt, sad, and in despair. He was a good friend and he wanted the best for me.
"Thank you." I whispered to him seeing the confusion on his face. "For being there for me."
He smiled and nodded at me. "Shuichi you know you're my best friend and I would do anything for you….anything."
Before I could respond Hiro captured my lips in a sweet simple kiss. Hiro broke away and stared into my eyes. Shock clouded my eyes and the kiss left me speechless. I didn't know what to do or how to respond. He kissed me! Hiro looked worried and began to back away from me slowly. For some reason I grabbed Hiro and mimicked the kiss. It was his turn to be shocked. I broke away and stared at him. Confusion evident on both of our faces. Silence engulfed the room as we struggled for the words to explain what just happened. Maybe it was an accident. Hiro felt sorry for me and I felt sad and it just happened by accident. That's it nothing but a unfortunate accident.
"Shuichi I….I didn't mean to push you. I'm sorry." Hiro said impassively before sanding up and walking out the door.
"Hiro……" I whispered into the darkness. The silence responded.
Roxie: Evil aren't we it was my idea for Shuichi and Hiro to kiss. It made the story more complicated and that much more interesting. That's the point. I want them to suffer a bit before we get into the plot more. Also I did it to build up suspense after all what is a story without some kind of suspense? Please review.
