Joker was walking down the street wearing a fedora hat and trench coat with the collar up hiding his face (A.N. did anyone get the reference). He was taking a break from both crime and Gotham to explore the world to get new ideas and to hopefully find a way to break his curse when he came across something that made even his cursed blood go cold.


Meanwhile down the road

"You stupid freak, you're dead!" Vernon yelled as he was beating Harry to death.

"I'm sorry, Uncle," Harry cried, hoping that if he apologizes, Vernon will stop.

"I don't care that the old freak is paying us to keep you weak and the only way that they won't bring you back to us good and normal people is if you're dead!" Vernon yelled, going to punch Harry even harder.

At this, Joker snapped, not a single one of the villains including himself, even with his curse, would try to kill a five-year-old. Joker took out his real gun and shot Vernon in the leg, causing Vernon to miss Harry, in his cry of pain. Vernon went to retaliate only to get knocked out by Joker.

Harry looked up to see Joker, who was standing over Vernon and was glaring at Vernon, if looks could kill Vernon would be dead instead of knocked out.

"Hey kid, you're safe now," Joker gently said, trying to copy what Robin did that one time he saw him save a kid from kidnappers. "Do you have anywhere you can go that's safe?"

"My cupboard," Harry answered quietly only to faint from the pain afterward.

"Well, f! #%%$" Joker swore, then carefully picking Harry off the ground and took out his cellphone calling the one person he never thought he ever would call. "Hey Bats, I need your help."


A few days later

Gotham General

Joker sat in the chair next to Harry's bed, waiting for the poor boy to wake up. He was still shocked by how, even in his coma, Harry insisted that he stayed near him. After what happened, it was apparent why his old family saw him as a freak with how much his magic freaked out when the cops tried to take Joker away.

Since Joker was a squib seer, he knew what was going on and was forced to let Batman and Gordan in on the secret of the magical world. He also told them why he truly became the Joker he never wanted to be because of the curse his so-called family placed on him before they abandoned him to the Muggles. He never thought that he would ever see those two look at him like that.

When they found out what Harry's name was Joker swore so much that he would make a sailor blush. When the others got Joker to calm down enough to explain, they both joined him in his swearing. What kind of person would do that to your nation's hero or any child for that matter?

Hearing a small grown caused him to come back to reality to see Harry slowly open his eyes.

"Hey, kiddo, how are you feeling?" Joker asked.

"It wasn't a dream? I'm free?" Harry quietly asked.

"Yeah, kiddo, you're never going back there," Joker told Harry with a smile. "And if they try to place you back, they have to go through Batsy and me! Nobody can get through us when we work together," Joker laughed.

"Batsy?" Harry asked as he tilted his head to the side like a cat.

"It's Batman, but Joker here insists on calling me Batsy or Bats," Batman said as he moved away from the dark corner of the room.

"Really, you can't sit like a normal person?" Joker asked.

"I wanted to let him see a familiar face as he first woke up, I didn't want to scare him," Batman stated.

"Well you could have been here without the mask Bats, I know who you are under there, and Harry will need a good home which is something I can't for sure give him with the curse my so-called family placed on me even if he is somehow keeping it from acting up," Joker stated to Batman.

"We will get that spell broken Joker, but I agree he needs a good home. I would like to give you a good home, Harry, would you like that? You Uncle Joker will be able to visit as long as he is on his best behavior during the visit" Batman asked Harry, causing him to have a big smile on his face and to laugh when Joker pouted at the last part.

"Will you be my Daddy?" Harry asked with hope sparkling in his eyes.

"If you will have me," Bruce said as he removed his cowl.

At this, despite the pain, Harry was in, he jumped tackled both Bruce and Joker with a big hug and cried tears of joy on their shoulders.

"Thank you! Thank you!" Harry repeated in their group hug until he fell asleep in their arms.


Years later

Joker shook his head as the 14-year-old Harry pranked his adopted brothers. It was hard to see how he was the same scared little boy from 9 years ago.


Flashback

Harry was finally released from the hospital and into Bruce's caring hands.

"Come on you two," Joker called from under his earlier disguise to Bruce, who was giving the still weakened Harry a piggyback ride. "We just got to go through this fake wall while holding onto Harry so you can get through the Muggle wards, and I can get past the curse block on me. Once we get through, we just have to walk down the road a little way to get to the Wizarding Bank, where we can get them to hopefully heal Harry up some more and make him your adopted son in magic."

"You couldn't get into there?" Bruce asked as they reached the fake wall.

"No, the curse blocks me from magical areas, which is why the curse hasn't been broken yet," Joker sighed.

"What could you have done for them to do this to you?" Harry asked quietly.

"I was just born with no magic," Joker said as they all walked through the wall.

"Do you think the people at this bank could heal you as well?" Bruce asked Joker as he led them to the bank.

"I hope so. I hate having no control over my life. At the very least, they can make me look normal again so I can stay near you guys without blowing your cover," Joker said with a shrug. "Here we are um… before we go in, please don't stare at the beings inside."

"Got it," Bruce said as Harry nodded.

Joker nodded back to them then opened the doors to the bank where Goblins with many other creatures and Humans were running different areas of the bank. Finding an opened teller Joker walked up to them and asked, "where do we need to go to do an inheritance test, health check, and adoption?"

"You will need to go into the back to the Inheritance Office." the Goblin stated, then turned around and yelled, "Grimhook!" as a Goblin appeared "take this group to the Inheritance Office for the test, health check, and adoption."

The Goblin, now named Grimhook, nodded and took them into the bank maze to the Inheritance Office with so many twists and turns that both Joker and Bruce couldn't find the way out.

"Here is where you need to go," Grimhook stated then turned away to go back into the maze.

"Thank you, Grimhook," Harry quietly thanked him, causing him to give Harry a shocked look.

"You're from the Britain Branch?" Joker asked.

"Yes, I'm sorry, child just not used to Wizards who are friendly to our kind" Grimhook gave Harry a Goblin attempt at a smile then continued down the maze.

"Why did you ask about the Britain Branch?" Bruce asked, going into detective mode.

"Down Bats, it's nothing you can help with the British Wizards are very racist and are stuck in the past and not evolving with the rest of the world" Joker sighed as he opened the door.

"Oh," Bruce said as they walked in.

The room they walked into was a plain white room with three chairs and a small table with a bowl on top. On the floor were many different healing runes, several of which glowed as they walked by to get to the man near the bowl.

"I see that we have some magical blocks and curses to deal with during the healing part of today," the man stated as he held out a knife out to them. "I need the three of you to drop three drops of blood into the bowl one at a time to see your inheritance and any magic placed on you that could get in the way of what we are here for today. After the three drops are in the bowl, a piece of paper will appear telling us everything we need to know." So they started with Bruce since they figured that he would be the easiest.

Inheritance Test of

Bruce Wayne (Batman)

Mother

Dead

Father

Dead

Son

Damian Wayne (Mother Talia al Ghul)

Titles

Lord of Wayne

Lord of the Bats

Lord of Ravenclaw

Blocks

100% Magic Block placed on bloodline in the 1800s, 25% broken

"Huh, well, that explains how you can see Deadman," Joker stated as Bruce stared at the paper in shock.

"I have a son with Talia?" Bruce asked in shock.

"That's what you are hanging on? Bruce, your entire family, was magical, and you somehow broke 25% of the Magic Block. What the hell did you do before you put the suit on? It's almost impossible to break a block on yourself without help?" Joker asked Bruce, who just shrugged as an answer.

Next to go was Joker.

Inheritance Test of

Joken Malfoy (the Joker)

Mother

Dead

Father

Dead

Brother

Lucius Malfoy

Titles

Lord of Malfoy

Blocks

100% Magic Block by Albus Dumbledore

Curses

Evil Deeds Curse by Lady Malfoy

The look of Insanity Curse by Lady Malfoy

Magical World Blocking Curse by Lady Malfoy

"WHAT!" The Joker, now named Joken, yelled, "I'LL KILL THAT MAN!"

"Joken stop, you're scaring Harry," Bruce calmly said, causing Joken to freeze and look over to see Harry trying to hide in Bruce's arms.

"I'm sorry Harry, I'm not mad at you I just found out that someone ruined my life and got a little mad thanks to that you did nothing wrong, and I promise that I will never hurt you, Harry," Joken quietly said to the scared little boy who slowly came out of his hiding place.

"It's your turn, Harry," Bruce said gently while holding onto the blade. "I need you to hold out your arm, Harry."

Harry slowly held out his hand, and Bruce lightly cut his arm, collecting three drops on the blade that he flicked into the bowl then tied his handkerchief over the small cut.

Inheritance Test of

Harry James Potter (Horcrux)

Father

Dead

Mother

Dead

Godfathers

Sirius Black (innocent of his crimes he was placed in Azkaban for)

Remus Lupin (werewolf blocked by law)

Titles

Lord of Potter

Lord of Riddle

Heir of Black

Lord of Lupin

Lord of Peverell

Lord of Gryffindor

Lord of Hufflepuff

Heir of Ravenclaw

Lord of Slytherin

Master of Death

Blocks

Godfather boned 100%, blocked by Dumbledore

Metamorphmagus 100%, blocked by Dumbledore

Natural Legilimency 99%, blocked by Dumbledore

Natural Occlumency 99%, blocked by Dumbledore

Natural Wandless Magic 100%, blocked by Dumbledore

Magical Core 75%, blocked by Dumbledore

Technomancy 99%, blocked by Dumbledore

Elemental Magic 100%, blocked by Dumbledore

Beast Speak 99%, blocked by Dumbledore

Magical Sense 99%, blocked by Dumbledore

Photographic Memory 99%, blocked by Dumbledore

Baby Memories 99%, blocked by Dumbledore

Potions

Blindly Trust the Weasley House, by Dumbledore

Friendship to Ron Weasley, by Dumbledore

Loyalty to the House of Gryffindor, by Dumbledore

Blindly Trust Dumbledore, by Dumbledore

Hate to the House of Slytherin, by Dumbledore

Illegal Marriage Contract

Ginny Weasley by Dumbledore and Molly Weasley

Illegal Account Transactions

Monthly 1000 galleons to Dumbledore Vault from Potter Vault Authorized by Dumbledore

Monthly 100 galleons to Weasley Vault from Potter Vault Authorized by Dumbledore and Molly Weasley

Monthly 100 galleons converted to pounds to Dursley Bank Account from Potter Vault Authorized by Dumbledore

No one in the room could speak for a long time after some time the Man brought them one at a time into the healing area, starting with Bruce and ending with Harry. Once they were all healed, the man brought out the Lord/Heir ring summoning box, some potions, and a goblet.

"So how are you three going to do the adopting part of today?" he asked the group.

"I am adopting Harry as my son, and Joken will be Harry's Uncle," Bruce said.

"All right," the Man said, filling the cup with one of the potions. "Bruce, you and Joken need to place three drops into the potion, then both drink half."

After doing so, Joken's hair that was already turning a pale blond darkened a little with a few dark brown streaks here and there. At the same time, Bruce's hair lightened from dark brown that was almost black to a little lighter brown color.

The Man cleaned the Goblet then poured another potion into the Goblet. "Do the same thing with Harry, Bruce."

After doing the same thing as before, Harry fell asleep as his bones changed, his hair then straightened and turned a shade lighter. After a few minutes, Harry woke up, showing his eyes shifted to green in the center and blue around the green, making it look like long green grass waving in the breeze on a bright blue day.

"Now the last step I can do for today I need you one at a time to place your hand on the box then take out the rings that appear you will need to place the rings one at a time on your finger once the rings accept you as their master you can combine them by placing them on the same finger. The Heir rings will be the only ones you can't combine. You will need to keep the rings with you to use the protection wards built into the rings and so you can charge your accounts so you won't need to keep large amounts of money on your person. The Goblins that you will see next will help you with all you need to know about your family's vaults….."


(A.N. I may make a version where this Harry does go to Hogwarts if I do so the story up to this point will be the same but the time jump will say that Harry is eleven.)

Joken shook his head out of the memory as Alfred walked in with a camera to get a family picture since this was one of the only times the family was in the same room and not with their teams. Everyone grouped up for the picture in their superhero suits except Joken, who was in regular clothes since he liked living a normal life for now. Bruce was in the newest Batman suit, Dick was in his Nightwing suit, Jason was in his Red Hood suit (A.N. Joker didn't kill Jason in this universe, but he still takes the name and outfit without the red helmet. Jason does have a close call with death, which causes the white stripe in his hair. To hide the white part in his hair he adds a red hood to his suit which was why he got the Red Hood name in this universe), Tim was in his Red Robin suit, Damian was in his version of the Robin suit, Barbara was in her Batgirl suit, last but not least was Harry in his Shadow Phoenix suit (A.N. Spiderman Noir's costume without his mask and a silver phoenix over his heart. Harry wears a black and silver trimmed domino mask over his eyes.)

Everyone stood near each other with a hand on the closest person to them. Alfred set the camera to give him long enough to get into the picture as the camera flashed the room filled with magic that filled the room in a bright light that once it faded, left the camera alone in the room.

"…."

"Hey Bat's, I need to ask you something," Fash said as he ran into the cave, not seeing anyone except the camera, which he thought was weird from knowing that the Bat-family only brought it out for special days. He walked over to it to see the final pictures it took, knowing that they do a serious picture first, then a funny one. He saw the typical serious picture first with what looked like a bright ball of light forming behind them, and in the funny picture was only the ball of light fading out. "Oh no," Flash said before running out of the cave.


Hogwarts Great Hall

TW Champion naming scene

Dumbledore's view

'Yes, soon, my runaway weapon shall be returned to my hands. Even with all the bumps along the way with the Malfoy's losing their status, Sirius being freed and my losing high positions thanks to the investigation from Harry not showing up or his letter being written, and the weird name that randomly appearing Hardison Wayne who said that he would be homeschooled in America like the rest of his family. What am I worried about the true Seer of the Malfoy's that I thought I gotten rid of can't find Harry, Sirius won't be able to claim Harry thanks to his time in Azkaban he will get enough time with Harry as Harry's DADA teacher this year,' I thought as I waited for the Goblet to name Harry as the fourth champion.

"Oh," I said as the Goblet light a fourth time giving my best-confused face as the paper flowed into my hand only to turn into a real confusion when I read "Shadow Phoenix?"

The Goblet flared to life, shooting a blinding flame to the floor in front of the Goblet leaving behind a group of people in weird clothes.

"ITS BATMAN!" a muggleborn yelled.

'Oh, crape!' I thought as I saw the blond-haired man in the group.


Shadow's view

We went into our battle stances as the light cleared with weapons in hand surrounding Alfred and Joken as he activated his emergency com to the JL Headquarters.

"ITS BATMAN!" a young voice yelled in excitement and shock.

"Anyone know where we are?" I asked.

"If what my Mother was telling my Brother was true, then we are at Hogwarts," Joken stated as the com connected.

"Are you guy's alright?" Flash asked. "I ran over to talk to Bat's, and I only found your camera that showed you were getting portal napped, then I ran to Headquarters," Flash said in his fast speak.

"Hey, Flash, we are all right it appears that we got summoned to Hogwarts. Most likely the Tournament I foresaw happening," Joken stated.

"Oh, I'll be right" Flash started in the com before appearing right next to us "here."

Seeing the shocked faces in the room, I chuckled and was surprised to hear a familiar laugh behind us at the table with the adults.

"All man! Where were you when I was in school?" another familiar voice full of laughter asked, causing me to turn to the table that Bat's and Nightwing were watching for incoming attacks. To see a familiar long curly black-haired man next to a short-haired dark blond lightly scared man. At seeing the two, my eyes grew in my shock.

"Padfoot? Moony?" I whispered in shock it was quiet enough that only my family heard, but of course, Moony and Padfoot were able to pick it up thanks to their animal senses. Causing them to look at me in shock, I recovered enough to bring a finger up to my lips in a shushing form, seeing they got the message I turned around back to the old man who looked like Christmas came early. "Who the heck are you?"

At this, he frowned, "I am Albus Dumbledore. I have been trying to find you since you were wrongly taken from your relatives."

"What the actual fuck" Red Hood growled "is this guy mental I was there when Shadow was brought into our family those monsters tried to kill him when he was a five-year-old. It was so bad that Joken was able to break the curse on himself long enough to get Shadow to Batman, and you're saying that it was wrong to get him away from there!"

"I'm sure it was just a misunderstanding," Dumbledore said, trying to calm everyone who was giving him death glares.

"How is this a misunderstanding?" Red Robin asked, activating the memory reviewer that he made after seeing how the pensive worked. As the memories showed what I had been through at that house and how Joker saved me Dumbledore got paler and paler as each memory played out while keeping our family's identities hidden with many in the room being held back so they wouldn't kill the old man but what made them all freeze was the memory of the bank.

"Hello, nephew," Joken said as he appeared next to the shocked Draco. "I see that you luckily got your looks from your mother. My brother was an ugly child growing up."

"Uncle, stop terrorizing our cousin," Nightwing sighed.

"Cousin?" Draco asked.

"Yep," I laughed, "my brothers and I are all blood adopted, which gave the ones without magic the ability to do magic." I stated then, seeing their shocked faces asked, "What you didn't know it could do that?"

"No wonder the British are so behind everyone" Robin stated "when a magical person marries a nonmagical person there is a version of the adoption potion that gives the nonmagical member some of the magician's magic that grows inside of the nonmagical person until they have magic of their own while the donated part gets returned. With this, there is no chance their child will be born with no magic, thanks to them giving new blood and magic into the child, and with both parents having magic they both can take care of their magical child. This happens with the other adoptions as well."

At this, everyone stared at Robin in shock.

"Brother, just because you were raised by assassins thanks to your mother doesn't mean you don't see how you could not have dropped that huge bomb on to them like that," Red Robin laughed.

"Well, you know how he is with people that he sees as inferior to him," I stated with a shrug while the others in our family sighed.

"Well, this is something that everyone else knows, so they are just idiots with their heads in the ground for not seeing this proving that they are sheeple just like the other you said they were," Robin stated while confusing everyone outside of our family.

"I thought that we agreed not to bring TM up again" I sighed then turned back to the crazy old man "I will participate in this death trap of yours if certain conditions are made."

"What are they?" Crazy asked.

"One you will only call me Shadow Phoenix, two you will not try to unmask me or my friends and family, three you will arrest Barty Crouch Jr. and his father for their crimes," I said as Nightwing hit Jr. with a spell that shows his true self. "Four I am a member of Team Batman no one else, five you will not intervene in my fight with Voldemort or with how I deal with him once I beat him…"


Wand weighing

Shadow's view

"You do know that my family doesn't use wands, right?" I asked after giving the very noisy reporter a thick folder that will keep her and her coworkers very busy during the space between the Tasks.

"What are you talking about, no one can do magic without a wand?" the idiot in yellow asked with the others nodding.

At this, my entire family lifted our right hand with our palms up and summoned a ball of fire into our hands "you were saying?" I asked while playing catch with my gray ball of flames.

"..."


Muggles from Space

By Reta Skeeter

"And here I thought this was a bad plan but now I can't wait for the next story you gave them Shadow" Robin laughed as he read the paper telling the wizards about our alien friends while also seeing the wizard's reactions.


First Task

Shadow's view

As I entered the field, I looked around the rocky area. Once I found the dragon and her nest, I walked straight toward the dragon. The dragon breathed her fire onto me, and when she stopped, she was confused with how I was still alive without a single scratch or burn on myself or my clothes.

I smiled at her reaction and asked her, "can't you smell me?"

At this, she brought her head to my chest and breathed in, then bared her neck to me in the dragon's way of asking forgiveness.

I laughed, "it's alright, my dear, you didn't know and were protecting your family. I am here because the sheeple thought that it would be a good idea to place a fake egg in your nest for me to grab. May I take this fake egg from you?"

"Yes, my king," she said as she turned to her nest, smelling her eggs and taking out the fake egg and giving it to me.


Muggles have Magic

By Reta Skeeter

Robin was on the ground from laughing so hard at how the wizards were acting with this one. Since it talked about the sharing magic adoption and the metahumans.


Second Task

Shadow's view

I jumped into the water, turning into my King Shadow Dragon form before the others could even jump in, causing them to freeze in shock. I reached the hostages freeing all of them and bringing them all to dock long before anyone else moved out of their shock.

"H...how, did you do that?" the French girl asked.

"Hm, oh, you didn't notice that I am a Multi Animagus?" I asked, causing the sheeple to stare at me in shock. "Well am not telling you all of my forms, so don't even try asking me."


Squibs are Metahumans

By Reta Skeeter

This caused Robin to stare at Shadow in shock since Robin, apparently didn't know this. Which causes the others to laugh.


Third Task

Shadow's view

I walked into the maze then allowed my gray and black flames to rise, covering my entire form. I then turned to the wall of the maze and said, "give me the path to the Goblet, or I'll make one myself."

The maze shooked in fear of being burned alive and opened a path straight to the Goblet "good maze," I said, bringing my flames back inside while thanking Ivy and her plants for showing me how easy a little fire can get them to do what I want. As I walked to the Goblet, I could hear the others gasping in shock, causing me to chuckle. Once I reached the Goblet, I could feel the magic placed on it, curious I wondered where it goes just to be safe, I let my flames out again except I kept my right hand free of the fire. I used my right hand to grab the Goblet allowing the magic to take me away.


Batgirl's view

Seeing Shadow vanish, I activated the satellite feed and had it locked onto Shadow, and projected it out for the wizards to see.


Shadow's view

"What the hell Peter you said that the portkey wouldn't cause him any harm!" a tall pale man yelled at a small man with rat-like features.

"I don't know what went wrong, Tom. I mean, my Lord, I tried it on myself, and nothing went wrong," the Ratman… Peter quickly told Tom.

"You do realize that I am not screaming in pain, right?" I asked the two as they continued to yell at each other.

"..."

"..."

"Well, if you aren't going to do anything, I'm going to head back," I said, letting my body entirely change into my lord Shadow Phoenix form, which is the size of an adult human.

"Wait," Tom said before I could teleport away.

"What?" I asked as I paused my teleport.

"I wanted to tell you that I didn't want to kill your parents and ask for your forgiveness. I was trapped under a spell that Dumbledore used to control me since I was 11 years old. When you survived the attack by the shielding, your Mother placed, and the spell hit me instead when it bounced off the shield. The spells placed on me broke, and I ran away to sort…"

"I know Tom, and I forgive you," I said before I launched myself at them, both grabbing them both with my feet then teleported back to the maze.


And that's the end of this story. I could tell you how Dumbledore got arrested and charged for what he did or how Tom and Joken teamed up as a crime-fighting duo but that is a story for another time.