*EPOV*
I thought the close call in Angoon might discourage Bella from wanting to work on exposure training, at least temporarily. So, knowing Bella as well as I did, I guess it shouldn't have surprised me when the opposite was in fact true.
When I'd expressed my surprise after she'd wanted to go back the very next day, her crimson eyes blazed with determination.
"The only way I'll ever get better at controlling my thirst is to practice. So that's what I'm going to do, because I refuse to be a danger to anyone else ever again," Bella declared with steely resolve.
The next time out had been tense, not surprisingly. Bella had insisted that Emmett and I squeeze her in a bone-crushing bear hug before she would take a breath in the presence of humans, just in case. Thankfully, that time had been uneventful, as was the time after that.
Each evening, we went out in a group of three. The entire family, all but Rosalie, took shifts being the third person to help me chaperone Bella to the edge of town.
On the way there and on the way back, Bella would practice using her gift by shielding the thoughts of whoever came with us. She was getting rather practiced at it and could throw her shield several yards, holding it for several minutes at a time.
I was bursting with pride at how hard she was working, on all fronts, and thrilled about the progress she was making at controlling her shield. But in truthfulness, I was a little ambivalent about being blocked from the thoughts of my family.
I was accustomed to the silence around Bella, but walking through the woods in total mental silence with two people was unnerving. Just like the first time I had encountered Bella's silent mind, I was thrown by it. It was...uncomfortable. Like being deprived of one of your senses.
The first time Bella blocked Emmett's thoughts from me, the first thing he did was tackle me to the ground.
"Holy shit, it worked!" he bellowed triumphantly, an excited gleam in his wide golden eyes. "Do you know how long I've wanted to do that?!" he crowed, helping me up to my feet and giving me a hard slap on the back.
He then wrapped a muscled arm around Bella's slight shoulders and squeezed her to his side. "Bella, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship," he quoted Humphrey Bogart, all dimples.
During the daytime, after our morning breakfast ritual with Esme (and now Carlisle who didn't have a hospital position to run off to ), Bella worked on strength management exercises, both independently and sometimes with Emmett.
In the absence of cars to work on, and out of boredom and pettiness, Rosalie, being Rosalie, fashioned another "inside joke" art installation out of all the crushed doorknobs by welding together the mangled lumps of steel into the shape of an infant and mounting it on the wall above a museum label with the title, "The Newborn."
I didn't need Jasper's gift to know that Bella was hurt by the regression in their relationship even though she kept a very stiff upper lip about it.
Upon seeing Bella's reaction to the sculpture, I'd attempted to reassure her. "Bella, try not to let her get to you," I sighed. "Rosalie's pigheadedness has nothing to do with you and everything to do with her," I explained with ice in my voice.
Honestly, if it hadn't been for my fondness of Emmett, I'd still be regretting Carlisle not leaving her to her fate.
It was multifaceted, of course. Rosalie walked around with a chip on her shoulder because in her eyes, she'd been right. She told Bella not to give up her humanity, and Bella didn't listen, and now Bella was "paying the price" for it. Rosalie savoring in Bella's hardships was her malignant way of saying "I told you so."
The other piece of it was her insufferable vanity.
Besides Victoria's creations that she'd fought last year, the only other newborn Rosalie had ever encountered was Emmett.
And while Emmett struggled with his adjustment period just as much (if not more) than Bella due to his unfathomable strength, Rosalie had had a fair bit more patience for his missteps. And now she was like a big sister jealous of all the attention the new baby in the family was getting.
It was really pretty pathetic, something I made sure to tell her every chance I got.
It had gotten so bad that even Carlisle had felt the need to intervene. One evening, when Bella, Emmett (now an eager volunteer) and I were heading to Angoon for more exposure training, I'd heard the conversation in Carlisle's thoughts.
I know this is difficult for you, my dear, but your attitude is unacceptable. Whether you like it or not, Bella is one of us now. And when you're hurtful to one of us, you're hurtful to all of us.
Carlisle, I'm sorry, it's just-
I know. We ALL know. You didn't want this, but Bella did. So respect that, respect her. And if you can't do that, perhaps it's time for you and Emmett to go off on your own again for a time until you can respect every member of this family.
Rosalie had blanched at the clear implication. Get over yourself or leave. Carlisle had never before had to make such an ultimatum, and it clearly jarred her.
That time I was smiling when Emmett tackled me to the ground.
And to Bella's very great shock the next time she needed an extra chaperone, Rosalie volunteered.
"So, um, what brings you out with us tonight, Rose? Not that I'm not happy to have you!" Bella added hastily.
Rosalie sighed. "I guess you could call it an 'attitude readjustment."
"She's trying to get back in Carlisle's good graces," I tattled a bit smugly. Rosalie glared at me like I was something stuck to the bottom of her shoe.
You're such a-
Rosalie's thoughts cut off as Bella shielded her. I grinned even more smugly, pointing deafly at my ears and shaking my head uncomprehendingly.
Rosalie seethed. "Stop that! The one time I actually want him in my head-" she growled.
"If this is what you call an attitude adjustment…" I snarled, interrupted by Bella who stood in between both of us, one hand placed on my chest and the other hand hovering over Rosalie's.
"You two are probably never going to get along, and there's nothing I can do about that. But Rosalie, you and Alice are the only sisters I'm ever going to have and I'd like it very much if you and I could try to get along. Can we?"
Rosalie nodded almost imperceptibly, and Bella smiled in response.
"I was hoping you'd say that. Because I think it's just so impressive that you've kept up a perfect record all these years, and I've been wanting to ask you if you have any tips for staying in control."
My clever wife! Needling her way through Rosalie's icy exterior by softening her up with compliments, the chink in her armor.
Rosalie smiled with superiority. "How would it look? Rosalie Hale doesn't chase after people. I've always preferred them to chase after me," she said while inspecting the nail polish on her left hand.
Now that we weren't in high school, she wore her wedding ring, the one acquired at her most recent wedding. The diamond and emerald sparkler, previously worn by Jackie Kennedy, was the only second-hand thing Rosalie Hale had ever owned in either lifetime.
"Oh... well, whatever works for you, I guess, heh," Bella said with a forced laugh, kicking a pine cone listlessly but with such force that it shattered into dust against a nearby spruce.
"You know, Bella," I interjected, "You've been doing so well these last few weeks, I think you're ready to try it again without the extra restraint. What do you think?" I proposed.
And I really did think that. It wasn't just because I didn't care to have a group hug with Rosalie. Which I didn't.
"You'll stand in front of me, though?" Bella asked hesitantly.
"Of course," I promised.
When we arrived at the hillside, the sky was bright with a large, low-hanging full moon. The smell of chimney smoke was thick in the air. It was a clear night, but the wind chill coming off the water would've been bitterly cold to the tribe.
We waited in the shadows on the dark side of the lonely, weatherbeaten church. Rosalie was looking at the little white chapel with a faraway look in her eyes. Bella had dropped her shield in concentration, so now I could hear her just fine.
Just like the church I was supposed to marry Royce in, she thought wistfully.
"Rose, did it ever occur to you that you might be...better off?" I asked softly. "He was no less of a monster than we are. Being married to someone so...vile," I growled the word through gritted teeth, "would have just been a different kind of hell."
For just a fraction of a second, her face softened with ancient pain and vulnerability, and then it iced back over into the cold scowl she always wore...at least when she was looking at me.
"Bella," Rosalie addressed my wife, though she was glowering at me. "I'll be your BFF if you can keep him the hell out of my head," she said in a calm but deadly tone.
Bella's lips pinched together and her shoulders shook with stifled laughter. "As often as I can," she agreed amiably, using the breath she was holding.
I mused out loud what she was undoubtedly thinking. "Carlisle was right. Your shield is making you rather popular, love," I smiled serenely.
This arrangement suited me just fine. Bella's new ability ingratiated her with Rosalie and gave me peace from the neverending stream of vapid prattle that was the inside of my sister's head. Talk about your win-win situations!
Just then the shrill wail of an infant pierced the quiet, clear night.
"Bella, brace yourself. The baby is colicky. The mother is taking him for a walk," I warned, taking a step closer to her with arms raised defensively, closely watching her every movement for signs that she was losing grip on her control.
Bella's body instantly froze into place, unbreathing. Her jaw clenched tight and her muscles were coiled with tension.
The crying grew louder as the bundled baby was wheeled outside in his pram.
Please, please go to sleep! The young mother's thoughts pleaded with her child as she shushed and hummed. I'm just so tired. Everything hurts. I haven't showered in days. I fed you, I changed you, I burped you. I swaddled you. I did everything I was supposed to do! Why won't you just SLEEP?! Her thoughts grew louder and more frantic the longer the baby cried.
I could see the baby through his mother's eyes. Only his face was visible under his knit cap and cocoon of blankets. He was red-faced and furious, his eyes were screwed shut and his gummy mouth wide open.
He didn't just sound colicky, though. He sounded ill, congested. His cries triggered a sickly choking cough.
Bella gasped at the sound of it. The swift intake of breath stunned her with the flames that scorched her throat. I inched even closer to her, ready to throw my arms around her if she reacted in the slightest.
But Bella didn't start to hunt the mother and child. Just the opposite. She spun on her heel and bolted back for the trees.
I stared after her for a moment, filled with pride. She'd run away. The best thing you could hope for from a newborn who'd lost control.
"Good for her," Rosalie shrugged, though I could hear the sincerity in her voice.
I took off after her, eager to tell her how proud of her I was. But she was really moving, using her newborn strength to turbocharge her strides.
"Bella!" I called after her, a smile in my voice. "You can stop. The air is clean." But she didn't stop. She ran all the way home, nearly tearing the double doors off their hinges to get inside.
"Carlisle!" Bella called, panicked, as soon as she was inside the doors. I burst through the doors right behind her, now thoroughly confused. What had I missed?
Carlisle appeared in front of us immediately.
"What is it? What's happened?" He asked urgently, alarmed by the tone of her voice. Knowing what we'd be out doing, he began to fear the worst had happened as he glanced from her troubled face to my bewildered one.
"There's a baby in town with whooping cough. That's really serious, right? Something that needs to be treated right away?"
Carlisle's face morphed from anxious to relieved to surprised.
"That's why you ran all the way back here?" I asked, sounding just as astonished as Carlisle looked. Rosalie returned then, clicking the door shut behind her, though she hadn't missed a word.
"You took the words right out of my mouth," Carlisle added. "And yes, pertussis can be fatal in an infant. And quite contagious. I'll go get my bag." That's when Esme appeared with the black leather satchel in her hand.
"Go help that baby," Esme demanded with a seldom-heard ferocity in her usually warm voice.
"I'll do what I can," Carlisle promised, taking the bag and double-checking he had the necessary antibiotics. "I'll show you the way," Rosalie offered, holding the door open for Carlisle who left without another word.
Wrapping my arms around Bella, I bent my head down to press a kiss behind her ear. "Will you ever stop amazing me?" I murmured. "I ran after you to tell you how incredible you are because I thought you ran away, and it would seem I didn't even know the half of it."
I pulled away slightly so that I could look at her. Bella ducked her head at the compliment but I caught her under the chin with my finger. "What I wouldn't give to see into your mind right now," I marveled.
Bella's eyes were still wide and bright with excitement, and her hair was windswept from the run. "Why don't we go back to our room and I'll show you," she whispered invitingly.
And she accused me of dazzling people.
Before I could abscond with her, my mother called Bella's name from where she stood on the stairs.
"Well done, sweetheart. You might've saved more than one life tonight," she acknowledged with a tight smile and solemn nod of her head.
"...If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go donate a new cancer ward to St. Jude's Children's Hospital," Esme said distractedly.
She turned and disappeared back up the stairs trying very hard not to think about how she'd felt when she'd been in that young mother's same position.
"Jeez. And I used to feel so proud of myself when I'd donate five bucks at the drugstore and they'd write my name on the little paper hot air balloon and stick it to the wall…" Bella mused.
"It's relative," I suggested with a smile. "Five bucks to the average teenager is the equivalent of an MRI machine to a Cullen."
Bella made an uncomfortable face. "Nobody should have that much money."
"I agree. That's why we give so much of it away," I explained patiently. "Now, I believe you wanted to show me something?" I asked with an eager expression.
Her amber eyes glinted mischievously. I let out a bark of surprised laughter as she swept me off my feet and carried me bridal style up to our room.
My early twentieth-century sensibilities might've felt a tad emasculated at the role reversal, but when your heart-stoppingly beautiful wife carries you to bed with desire written all over her face, your ego tends to shut up and go with the flow. (And at least Emmett hadn't seen.)
"Would it be ungentlemanly of me to admit that this is my favorite way to practice controlling your shield?" I asked as she deposited me on the center of the bed and crawled on top of me.
Kneeling astride my hips, I let my hands rest on the soft swell of hers.
Enraptured, my mouth lolled open a bit as she crossed her arms in front of herself, pinching the hem of her shirt between her fingertips and peeling it up over her long, slender torso.
"Only if it's ungentlemanly to state the obvious," Bella retorted with a smirk.
Bella didn't often really feel her power, but when she did she was like a phoenix rising from the ashes, radiating with confidence and passion and lust...To be crass, I'd never been harder for her.
"My Bella," I crooned, sliding my hands up her sides, luxuriating in the feel of her soft, smooth skin under my hands. "You were incredible tonight. I was bursting with pride even before you went all 'Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman.'"
"Doctor who?" she asked quizzically.
"No, not Doctor Who. Doctor Quinn...perhaps I'm dating myself," I said with a wry chuckle.
*BPOV*
I knew very well who Dr. Quinn was (and Doctor Who for that matter), but it was too much fun to pass up the opportunity to tease him whenever he made a dated pop culture reference-an occupational hazard in a May-December romance such as ours.
"I'm only kidding. Renee had a thing for the long-haired guy with the pet wolf," I revealed, kissing up the chiseled line of his jaw.
"Well that explains a lot," Edward snorted, so I nipped him on the ear.
Pulling back to look at him, I sternly narrowed my eyes "Don't go there, Mr. Cullen," I warned in a husky voice, booping him on the tip of the nose. Jacob Black had no place in our bed. And besides, I was nothing like my mother.
"Consider it dropped," he grinned, angling his head up for a kiss, which I happily obliged. The kiss deepened into something quite heated. One of his hands tangled in my hair, cradling the back of my neck and pressing our mouths impossibly closer, but still never close enough.
His other hand trailed over my body, over my side, my back, my ass...and then with a snap of his fingers at the clasp of my bra, my breasts sprang free from the confines of the navy blue satin bra I wore.
Pulling the straps down my arms and quickly tossing the garment aside, I asked with a sardonic smile, "Do they pull you boys aside in middle school and teach you how to do that or...:?"
Suddenly serious, Edward demanded in an icy calm tone, "Tell me who was unhooking your bra in middle school and I'll be happy to relieve them of their fingers."
A chill rippled up my spine as I could see in his eyes that he meant it.
"Those memories are pretty foggy..." I mumbled. It wasn't technically a lie, those particular memories were starting to fade, but a person never forgot the name of their bully.
If only Sebastian Angeles knew how close he'd come to dismemberment. I shook my head free of the abstraction; there was no place for Sebastian in our bed, either.
As if of their own accord, my hips ground into his making him groan at the friction. I couldn't help it; it was such a turn-on when he got all protective over me. Edward's abs tightened as he leaned up to take one breast in his hand and the other in his mouth.
I tossed my head back, lost in the sensation of his lips, teeth, tongue, and fingertips sucking, plucking, and licking me into an absolute frenzy as I wantonly rocked my body over the tented, straining fabric of his khakis.
Edward groaned, and I felt the loss of his mouth. A moment later his hands stilled my hips over his. "Bella, love, wait...wait, we're going too fast," his voice was low and rough.
"You don't get to say that to me ever again," I growled, as I none-too-gently yanked his polo shirt over his head.
"I just meant there was something I wanted to try first," he chuckled at my impatience, "but you sidetracked me." His long, slender fingers now cupped around my ribcage adoringly stroked the undersides of my breasts with his thumbs.
"Why don't you see if you can drop your shield, now, before we make love? I bet you could do it if you tried," he eagerly suggested.
"Somebody's impatient," I teased, though I was the one frantically reaching for his belt buckle.
"Well, yes, but I also think some distance training could be beneficial. It would be useful if you could let me read your mind with our clothes still on," he chuckled again, stopping my hands before I could unbutton his khakis.
"Oh, alright," I grumbled. "But just so you know, the only thing I'm thinking right now is how much I want to—"
But Edward cut me off by gently clapping a hand over my mouth.
"No spoilers," he grinned, and I could feel his rock-hard arousal press even more prominently into my backside.
With a roll of my eyes, I then focused all my energy on feeling the thin skin of my shield. I expanded it at first, putting Edward inside the bubble of my protection. This was easier.
Once I could feel it responding to my will, I shrunk it back down and concentrated on pushing it away from me. I could feel the weight of it, its resistance pressing back.
I don't know how else to describe it except to say that it felt like bench-pressing with my brain. The weight, the force, was so real—so palpable, that I grunted with the mental exertion to free my mind from its orb.
When Edward let out a small gasp, I knew that I had done it. And then I really let him have it. In immaculate detail, I thought about all the ways in which I wanted to please him, wanted to feel him pleasing me.
I thought of ripping his clothes off.
I thought of how we'd look with me bouncing over him, taking every inch of him inside me as he worshiped my breasts from beneath me.
I thought of the sounds he would make when the thick head of his manhood brushed against the back of my throat; how his hands would feel tangled in my hair and molded against the side of my face as I brought him pleasure over and over again.
I thought of the sounds I would make when his face was buried between my legs, and the shredding of Egyptian cotton sheets between my fingers clenched at my sides.
Edward's answering growl was just as feral as his lips were as they crashed into my mouth, breaking my concentration.
I felt the air rush past my face as Edward rolled us over, claiming the top position. He kissed me hard and deep, and long past the point I would've passed out from oxygen deprivation as a human.
His hands were on my face, and in my hair, palming my breasts and hips. They were desperate and relentless, they were everywhere.
When he finally pulled away, his eyes were dark with desire. "Outside. Where I won't break the furniture." His voice was low and hard; it sent a thrill rippling up my spine.
*EPOV*
How many times over the decades had I seen a dim version of myself reflected in the predictable sexual fantasies of my classmates? And not all that infrequently, my teachers and other school personnel, as well.
I couldn't say for certain, but it was roughly the same number of times that I'd groaned internally and tried to block it out or find someone more interesting to listen to.
It was like...watching an amateur pornography film where I was portrayed by a lousy impersonator. They never got it quite right. Some aspect of my face, my voice, or my physique was always wrong. And I was almost always in service of the woman lusting after me. If the person was male, now that was a different story altogether.
Now, I knew logically that Bella must've fantasized about me to some extent, just as I fantasized about her. But to actually see it, see us in her mind in such exquisite detail as imagined through her sharp vampire eyes and heard through her ears?
It also was the first time I saw myself depicted making love to a woman I actually wanted.
I was so turned on, I was barely in control of myself. One thing was for certain, this room wouldn't do. I didn't want to be quiet or gentle or tame. Didn't think I could be even if I tried.
Filled with an uncontrollable lust and barely able to form complete sentences, I suggested a change of scenery. With one last quick kiss, I leaped off the bed and headed for the fastest exit.
I cranked the window open with a maddening little device that reminded me of the manual windows in pre-1970s automobiles, or Bella's old Chevy for that matter.
Bella yanked her blouse back on, not bothering with the bra. She sprang out the window without hesitation after I silently gestured with an open palm for the lady to go first. I followed her out the window into the blackness of night.
Jumping over the narrow canal that burbled along the backside of the property, I followed the joyful sounds of Bella's laughter, as wild and free and unencumbered as everything else in this place.
It was the same exact laugh I'd heard in that original vision, the one Alice had first seen of Bella being like us. The one that I had fought against so hard for so long.
That day, that instant was now upon us and we were living it out in real-time just as Alice had foreseen.
It was a strange sort of déjà vu; not like we'd been here before, but that I knew it would happen and now it was. A thread pulled from Alice's tangled web of futures had been woven into the fabric of reality.
We didn't go far. Only far enough that not even the other vampires on the island would be able to hear.
Under a canopy of evergreen boughs so thick that the snow didn't even make it through to the ground, Bella spun around to throw herself into my arms. She wrapped her arms around my neck and her legs around my hips, kissing me fiercely.
I staggered backward half a step at the force of her running at me full speed but instantly corrected and greedily returned her kiss, supporting her weight with my hands under her perfectly formed backside.
As we stood there wrapped around each other, kissing each other as if tomorrow would never come, she lifted her shield again, and I groaned as I was bombarded with images of me taking her here and now, just like this.
We frantically tore at each other's clothes and I rained kisses down on every square inch of her skin that my mouth could reach, breathing in the delectable sweet scent that perfumed her skin.
Bella bucked her hips against me, trying to impale herself on my throbbing erection, but before she could, I hooked my arms under her thighs and raised her up to sit on my shoulders.
Bella yelped in surprise at the new position but then moaned in utter satisfaction as my tongue dipped into her soft, slick cleft.
The moan that escaped her now was at least an octave below her normal speaking voice, deep and guttural and it sounded like pure sex to my ears clasped between her thighs.
I love how much he loves this, she thought.
My lips smiled into hers as I suckled her sensitive bundle of nerves, humming with my own extreme satisfaction.
Was there anything I loved more than hearing her cries of pleasure, to taste it on my tongue?
Grunting possessively, I drove my tongue inside her, making her wail. My own arousal stood straight up against my belly at the knowledge that I was the only one that would ever know the sacred gift of her body. I was the only one who would ever bring her pleasure; the only one who would derive pleasure from hers.
Mine, I thought with a growl as I lapped at her wetness, feeling her muscles quiver and tense as I brought her right up to the edge of her orgasm.
Bella's fingers tightened in my hair and she went completely silent, the calm before the storm, I thought, as I clasped my lips over and sucked in earnest.
Oh! Oh! Right there. Don't stop! Yesssss.
"Mmmm," I hummed in encouragement.
After one eternal moment, Bella's silence was shattered by a hair-raising scream of completion. I kept licking, savoring her down to the last drop as I coaxed out every last spasm of pleasure.
Before she'd even had a chance to come down from the high, I lowered her back down my body and drove into her with one hard thrust.
"Edward!" she screamed as I felt her muscles spasm around me, still feeling the aftershocks of her release.
With my arms hooked under her thighs, I curled my biceps over and over again, burying myself within her tight, wet heat.
Pressing her hands down on my shoulders for leverage, Bella bounced against me, meeting my thrusts with equal determination. I could feel her angling her hips so that her center rubbed against my pubic bone with every thrust.
Feeling her muscles start to tighten around me, my lips crashed into hers, swallowing the sound of her sob as she climaxed seconds before my own orgasm washed over me.
I rutted into her twice, and then just once more as I emptied myself deep inside of her with a long, protracted groan.
I pressed my forehead against hers as we came back down to earth. When her panting slowed to a more normal rhythm, I kissed her head first, then the tip of her nose, and finally her lips.
I love you, she thought, as her arms, legs, and insides gripped me in a tight embrace. I could only moan and squeeze her back, burying my face into the juncture of her shoulder and throat and pressing my lips against the slightly raised scar there.
Then she surprised me by laughing lightly.
She explained out loud, "It's a shame I didn't figure out how to do that as a human. You never would've held out til the honeymoon."
I snorted. "You say that now, but how would you have explained the broken bed to Charlie?"
*A/N* Thank you so much for your patience in waiting on this update! Real life has been kicking my butt lately, and I am currently finishing up this chapter from my phone on the road while my family drives 1,000 miles on a road trip from Washington State to California. That's how much I wanted to get this out for you all!
I will try to write more from the road, but I wouldn't expect a new update until sometime after I get home on 6/4. Enjoy the holiday weekend, lovelies, and as always, thank you for reading and reviewing! Can't wait to hear what you think.
