Disclaimer: Hmm…do I own Fullmetal Alchemist? Nope…Now? Afraid not. How about now? –Sigh- No. Ah I guess I'll wait a couple more seconds, maybe I'll own it then! Yep and also that day pigs will fly and rabid fan girls will cease to exist. (Aw man I'm getting my hopes up!)

Chapter 2:

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A state of mind? How about none, Is it just in your head? I highly doubt it. How about moving on? You know you'll never do it. Hate, deception, depression or insanity? How about all of the above…

-xxxx-

This was it, there was no turning back now, and her mind was made up. That is if you could really call that void of sorrowful, twisted thoughts a mind. She was going to give Edward what he wanted, in some sort of sick way she saw it as her way to being forgiven. Too bad there really wasn't anything to be forgiven for in the first place.

She brought the screw driver down onto her wrist and sunk the small metallic substance into her creamy flesh. She winced, the pain starting to tingle at the spot where the blood surfaced. She paid it no mind and brought the small metal blade up her arm, tearing the skin all the way up. She stopped a couple inches before her elbow and clamped her hand hard onto her arm. The limb was crying crimson regret all over her hand and the floor; she clenched her teeth so hard she swore her gums were crying the same salty liquid too.

She lay on the floor shivering for a minute or so then finally the pain started to subside. She let out a quivering breath, and then almost suddenly giggled. It was a small, almost unsure giggle at first then it turned into horrendous fit of bubbled laughs. Tears streaked down her face and soon the giggles died and she let out a soft, quick sob. She was pathetic and she hated herself down to ever fiber of her being, or so it felt.

Suddenly a knock was at the door and Rose's voice could be heard on the other side saying softly, "Winry? Winry are you okay? I thought I heard crying…" Her voice trailed off slightly. Winry bit her lip slightly then sugar coated her voice and replied. "I'm fine, Rose. I just pricked myself while making some automail that's all!"

"Oh, uh Okay…Sorry for bothering you." She replied just as soft as she did before.

"Oh, no you're not bothering me!" Winry replied a little too hastily.

Rose sighed and sounded as if she was about to protest but then the sound of Rose's baby wails reached her ears and Rose took off to care to her child. Winry struggled up to her bed; nausea swept over her making this a difficult task. She collapsed onto her bed and took in a deep breath of air, it felt so precious, the air, yet she had to be so worthless. Now that she thought about it, she really hadn't been much help to Ed except being there to fix his automail. Sure that was a minor problem, but the real problems were left unhealed. They were the problems that throbbed on the inside, where it hurt the worst. She could never be there to help those kinds of wounds, not then and now not ever.

Tears threatened to fill her already numb and watery eyes. Winry turned her head away from the mirror that hung on the wall across the room. She was ashamed to look at herself, she knew that her eyes were proubly swollen and had the purple or blue bags that every person with the lack of sleep wore. She hugged her legs to her chest and tiredly drifted off to sleep; entering a world, a land of sleep, the place she now hated the most.

-xxxx-

Rose stared at the bubbling soup that sat in the huge pot upon the stove. She had been stirring the soon to be dinner until her worries started to build up and she couldn't help but try to think out a reasonable reason to Winry's behavior. Rose never liked to poke her nose into people's business, and it was pretty obvious too. It was just this certain thing bugged her, she didn't know why but she felt like someone tied a knot with her stomach. Usually when she got that feeling it meant no good.

"Rose! The soup, it's over flowing!" Pinako said, snapping Rose out of her deep thoughts. Her eyes widened and she jumped back a tad and stared in shock at the boiling hot soup that had over flowed all the way to the floor.

"O-oh my." Rose said softly, yet shocked. She turned around to apologize to Pinako but stopped short when Pinako handed her a mop and a bucket.

After cleaning up the mess of wasted soup and turning off the oven it ended up they still had enough soup for dinner. Pinako called upstairs to Winry, saying that dinner was ready. Rose's face suddenly changed from relief to worry, loud thumping could be heard. It sounded as if Winry was hurrying around upstairs…like a maniac. She could hear the hesitant and frantic tone of Winry's voice as she called down replying hastily 'D-down in a minute!'

Rose opened her mouth to tell Pinako about how she was worried, but Pinako beat her to it.

"She's hiding something from us." Rose's eyes widened, she would believe it if Pinako told her that she could read minds. Winry's door could be heard slamming against the wall behind it as she rushed out and started to make her way down the stairs.

-xxxx-

Winry's P.O.V

'Oh great, this is just perfect!' I shouted in my head as I rushed around to find something to cover up my arm. I tore through the First aid kit, nothing that I could use. With Band-aids all over my arm it would be more than obvious I was hiding something. Suddenly it hit me. All I needed to do was wear something with long sleeves! 'Oh Winry you moron, the answer was right infront of you the whole time!' I thought mentally slapping myself, as I ripped through my closet and pulled out a long sleeve shirt. Quickly changing into it, putting it on backwards a few times, I rushed to my door. I paused and I literally gulped as my shaking hand neared the doorknob. "Come on; get a hold of yourself Winry." I whispered to myself.

I could exactly go out there twitching and shaking and not have them notice.

I drew in a deep breath and placed my hand on the knob and thrust the door open hard. It was as trying to prove to myself it was open for sure. I winced when I heard it slam into the wall behind it, but decided that matter would be left for later, and walked down stairs. With each step my heart started to sound more and more like a drum being pounded on…furiously. I paused at the step that was right before the wall on the stairway ended. One more step and I would be in their view. I had to stay calm…I had to be myself. Too bad I was far from being myself. I was far from being, Winry Rockbell. I leaned my foot forward inching to what might be my regret.

-xxxx-

(Normal)

Winry, who was practically holding her breath, took the step down and plastered a smile onto her face.

"Winry," Pinako begun but had paused to take a drag on her pipe then followed with puffing out the toxic fumes. "Sit down and eat, Rose has made soup for dinner." Winry obliged and sat down across from her, putting on a normal face and 'happily' waited for her dinner. Rose, not too suspiciously, watched Winry from the corner of her eye as she put the bowls full of soup onto the table infront of Pinako and Winry.

Rose glanced at Winry several times just to try and get a hint or clue to how Winry could be hiding something. Her eyes stopped on Winry's sleeves, they were all stained. Rose mentally laughed, she felt so stupid. Winry had been trying to hide the fact she got oil all over one of her shirts. Rose smiled warmly and said softly,

"Don't worry Winry I'll wash that shirt for you later, I'll get those stains out for you."

Winry looked at Rose confused for a second then looked down at her arms. She paled greatly, she had completely forgotten about wrapping her arms up. Sure the sleeves would cover the cuts from being seen, but blood would easily seep through. Winry turned around and smiled at Rose hoping she didn't know exactly what thoose stains were.

"Thank you Rose, how'd you know this was my favorite shirt?" Winry said, quickly covering for herself. Rose smiled and nodded, Winry mentally sighed. 'She fell for it, oh thank god' Winry thought as she turned back to soup and took a spoonful into her mouth.

"Oh yeah, I got the automail for the customer finished today," She said after swallowing the soup. "But I'm out of parts for the next order of automail." Pinako, who had finished her smoke and started to eat the soup, swallowed her own mouthful of soup and replied, "I'll send Al out for them when he comes back." Winry blinked and looked around the table and asked,

"Al left? Well that's weird I hadn't noticed. Where did he go?"

"He's out with Izumi practicing; he'll be back in an hour." Pinako responded. Winry smiled and nodded, but then Pinako continued. "Maybe he can buy you a new shirt," Winry wearily nodded and was about to say something but Pinako wasn't finished. "We can't have you wearing a shirt with blood all over it."

Winry's eyes widened to the max, and her breath hitched within her throat. Her mind raced to explain, but it all went blank. She just sat there dumbstruck. Rose let out a soft gasp, by the look on Winry's face Pinako spoke the truth. "And while he's out getting those I think you should get busy to cleaning the stairs." Winry slowly turned to glance at the stairway, as if her eyes couldn't get any wider, they did. The stair way and the floor in between her and the staircase had droplets and smears of blood.

To be continued…

A/N: Well there you guys go the second chapter. Hope you enjoyed it. Please read and review! Oh yeah and remember creative criticism please if you want to complain about the story. Anyways till the next chapter.