Summary: Well now that everyone's seen Lorelai's pain, what will the residents of Stars Hallow do about it? And what will Luke do when he finds out? Post – I Get A Sidekick Out Of You, of course. No spoilers. (There can't be because I'm spoiler free.) LL, I hope. Jeez….
Disclaimer: As much as I wish a single one of these stories would actually come true, they won't because I don't own these characters or anything related to the Gilmore Girls.
Notes: Okay I think I've got this all worked out. This is the second half of the story. The long awaited Luke and Lorelai scene, it took a little while to get it to work out right. I didn't want stupid corniness and I didn't want to to be like a happily ever after thing, because that would never happen after one conversation. So here goes, hope you like it and please review!
Truth and Consequences
Running quickly up the steps to Lorelai's house, Luke turns the knob on the frontdoor but finds it surprisingly locked. Quickly hunting around his pockets, he realizes that he just gave his keys to Kirk. "Dammit!" he yells, angry at himself for giving the keys to Kirk and frustrated with himself for getting himself into this situation. Banging on the door he yells for Lorelai, but receives no response. Stepping away from the door, Luke folds his arms over his chest sighing. Then he notices the turtle on the porch and gets the key out from underneath and unlocks the front door. "Lorelai?" he calls, entering the dark house. He sighs, rubbing a hand over his face.Walking quickly through the living room, Luke rushes up the stairs and into the bedroom. There he finds Lorelai asleep on the bed. She is curled up on her side of the bed, facing away from the middle. And his heart clenches, still hearing Lulu's words in his head.
"Lorelai?" he calls softly as he walks close to the bed, unzipping his coat as he walks. Lorelai slowly glances over her shoulder to figure out who is entering her bedroom.
"Luke?" she asks hoarsely as if she doesn't really know who it is. She blinks, focusing on Luke.
"Hey Lorelai," he says, taking off his jacket and holding it in his hand as he sits down on his side of the bed. Lorelai brushes the hair out of her face as she pushes herself up into a seated position, letting the blankets fall as they may.
"Hey," she responds softly. Luke leans in and kisses her. "Glad you're back," she adds, forcing a small smile.
"I missed you," Luke tells her.
"Me too," Lorelai admits truthfully.
"So the wedding was nice?" he asks, not letting her know that he knows anything more about it, giving her a chance to open up and tell him what happened. Lorelai shrugs.
"Yeah," she whispers, pressing her lips together. "The wedding was nice. They seem happy." Luke raises an eyebrow. Lorelai looks down nervously, hoping the expression on her face isn't too revealing.
"Anything else you want to tell me about the wedding?" Luke probes. Lorelai shrugs again.
"Christopher came," she whispers. "But you knew that."
"Yeah," Luke agrees. "You feeling better?"
"Better?" Lorelai repeats, not really understanding what he's getting at. Luke sighs.
"I ran into some distraught members of our town when I pulled up in front of the diner a little bit ago," Luke hints. Lorelai looks away, fearing what they must have told them.
"Oh," she breathes, hoarsely. She clears her throat, tucking some hair behind her ear.
"I heard you gave quite the toast," Luke says. Lorelai shrugs.
"Yeah… I don't know… it's kinda fuzzy, ya know?" Lorelai mumbles, grimacing. Luke nods, touching her hand.
"They said the basic concept circled around you thinking you're not going to get married." Lorelai looks away, trying not to show Luke the tears in her eyes. She purses her lips, thinking. Luke squeezes her hand, just waiting for her response.
"We're never going to get married, are we?" Lorelai finally asks in a whisper, still not looking at him.
"No, we are. We are Lorelai, I said we are going to get married, and we are," Luke insists, apparently needed to repeat himself to get his point across. Lorelai licks her lips, trying to believe him. She finally looks up at him with her sad eyes.
"You said that before," she reminds him. "You said that you wanted to wait until things were right with April." Lorelai sighs. "So I guess I'm just wondering where do you have to be with April before we can set a date?" Luke shrugs.
"I – I don't know, actually."
"I mean with Rory, you knew that when she came around, it'd happen, but with April… I mean it's just up in the air, you know?" Lorelai looks at Luke expectantly, drawing her hand away from his and adjusting herself on the bed so she can sit up straighter.
"I know, but I can't say for sure. I'm still trying to figure things out. But I do want to marry you," Luke claims again.
"Actions speak louder than words Luke," Lorelai reminds him somberly. Luke sighs in frustration, his heart heavy with guilt.
"I know," he admits. She sighs, looking down at her hand, twisting her engagement ring around on her finger. Lorelai bites her lip, sniffing as a tear rolls down her cheek as she tries to think things through. Luke's breath catches in his throat as he finally sees how upset she is.
"I'm afraid that it's over." She sniffs glancing up at him. "Is this over between us?" she asks softly. She tucks hair behind her ear again and then goes back to playing with the ring.
"No," Luke responds, taking her hand again, holding it tight so that she can't move the ring. "It's not over. We're not over. I love you."
"You say you love me but what does that mean?" Lorelai wonders.
"Never having to say you're sorry?" Luke responds lightly. Lorelai gives him a look. Luke sighs. "It means that I love being with you. It means I miss you when we're apart. It means that whenever something's going on, you're the one that makes it all okay. It means I can't go a day without this." He kisses her, but she doesn't respond, looking away instead. Luke cocks his head, trying to get her to look at him, but she doesn't. "It means it kills me to know that you're hurting." Lorelai's silent for a moment. Luke lightly plays with a few strands her hair, letting his fingers stroke her shoulder comfortingly.
"Then why do you keep lying to me?" Lorelai finally squeaks out. Luke looks shocked at this question.
"Lying to you?" Lorelai flips her head around to face him.
"You kept April a secret for two months. Two months, Luke! Two months!" Lorelai exclaims, driving home the point.
"Back to that again?"
"I'm not mad that you have a daughter, I'm mad that you kept it a secret. And that since then you've kept her a secret from me, not letting me see her, meet her, get to know her. And now Rory got to meet her? And you didn't tell me?" Lorelai rants. Luke sighs.
"So you know about that," Luke realizes.
"Yeah, and I suppose you hoped Rory wouldn't tell me. Well you almost got your wish, too bad my daughter doesn't have my quick reflexes," Lorelai spits out. "I can't believe you haven't introduced us. And I can't believe she met Rory. And more than that, I can't believe you didn't tell me she met Rory. We've spoken every night since you left, some days more than once, and you didn't even mention it!" Lorelai throws her hands up in frustration, shaking her head in disappointment. Luke folds his hands in his lap, ashamed of himself. He considers whether to explain or apologize. Before he can come to a descision, Lorelai shakes her head again, less emotional now, allowing another tear to fall. She sniffs. "How is it that it's so easy for Lane? She's 22, but she's got it figured out. She has her guy. She's married. She knows she's set for life. Why can't it be that easy for us?" Lorelai quietly wonders.
"We're not 22," Luke responds. Lorelai slides her eyes over to him.
"I can't get out of this," Lorelai says softly. Luke looks confused. "Even if I wanted to, I could never leave you, I could never break up with you. I'm in this too deep, I love you." These words, which should be happy, only make Lorelai sadder. She looks away again as the tears start to fall. "I can't leave because not only would I lose my fiancé, but I'd be losing my best friend. And it hurts, Luke. It really hurts." Lorelai presses her lips together, trying to swallow her tears but failing miserably. Luke scoots closer to Lorelai, wrapping an arm around her shoulders, pulling her to him. Lorelai slowly lets her head fall onto his shoulder. Luke turns his face into her hair, kissing the top of her head.
"Lorelai, I never wanted to hurt you," he tells her, frustrated with himself for not realizing and not noticing what was right in front of him. Lorelai fiddles with the ring on her finger, staring off into space. "This isn't how it's supposed to be. It shouldn't be this complicated." Lorelai closes her eyes, wrapping her arms around her stomach.
"Are you breaking up with me?" she finally asks.
"I could never do that Lorelai. I've loved you since the moment you walked into my diner 10 years ago and handed me that horoscope. I've waited my whole life for you. And even when we're having trouble, I still can't imagine my life without you. The worst days are still some of the best days of my life," Luke murmurs, kissing the top of her head again, his face still buried in her hair. Lorelai opens her eyes, her expression softening as she listens to his words.
"So what do you want to do?" She moves her head, turning to look up into his eyes.
"I want to work through this. Together. We're going to start now. We're going to talk about this. We're going to figure this all out. Everything that you need. Everything that I need. We're going to figure out how to make two lives into one life," Luke replies. Lorelai stares at him, gazing into his eyes. "And it's going to be hard. I know it is, but I'm willing to do it because there's nothing I want more than to be with you, if you're willing."
"I am," Lorelai responds hoarsely. She clears her throat. "I want to be with you more than anything in the world. I want to figure things out so we can get married and be together forever." Luke reaches up and gently plays with her hair, a small smile on his lips. He brushes the tears off her cheeks with his other hand.
"I want to figure things out so that you're never in pain again," Luke promises her. A soft smile forms on Lorelai's lips as she nods slowly, gazing into his eyes, trying to see the truth within them. And what she sees is that his words are the truth to the best of his ability. "Then we're all in?" Luke asks, breaking in on Lorelai's thoughts. She hesitates for only a second before nodding.
"All in," she repeats. Luke cups her cheek, leaning in to capture her lips with his, kissing her tenderly and this time Lorelai responds, kissing him back. And she begins the healing process of opening herself to him, letting him back into heart and into her trust.
