Malfoy was still stewing about the attack on Slytherin during the match a few weeks later but he was actually quite terrified of Harry so he didn't dare to do anything. He did dare however to throw in the odd snide comment as they passed each other in the crowded hallways.
Once he dared to go a little further and threw a hex at him. Unsurprisingly his aim was so bad that he missed. Rather horribly. The spell hit Dean Thomas, who was on the other end of the hallway from Harry. How he could have missed that badly is an unsolved mystery even to this day, rather like who killed Amy Dudley during the reign of Elizabeth the first. Well, not quite, Amy was still wandering around in the world, in fact through the hallways of Hogwarts. She is better known as the Grey Lady.
Harry took Dean back to the common room and sorted him out before promising that Malfoy would be punished. In the strictest confidence of course.
"But what can we do to him?" Fretted Ron who had come with them.
"Whatever we do it has to be good. Something he'll really hate." Fumed Dean as he sat comfortably in one of the armchairs.
"Hm. True. For this I think we may need a little help." Harry strode over to the fireplace and threw in some floo powder carelessly. He stuck his head in and after a moment came back out and repeated the act.
The second time he stayed in for a little longer.
Eventually he pulled his head out and shook the soot from his soot black hair.
A moment later there was a knock on the portrait hole and Hermione and Seamus came in.
"Right, I had a word with the twins a moment ago and they have given me some advice as to the punishment of Mr Malfoy for the heinous act of hexing Dean. They told me about how they would handle the situation. And before you ask, Ron, it doesn't include making him walk like a penguin for a week. While that would involve the essence of Malfoy's punishment, it has been done far too many times already."
"What do you suggest we do?"
"Fred and George's advice was public humiliation."
"We were going to do that but you said…"
"Look, I know what I said. And we did it, didn't we? The match and all. This time however, I think the words I should have used were PERSONAL public humiliation."
"How does that work, then?" Seamus said looking incredibly confused.
"Hermione, you understand feelings, don't you?"
"I would hardly say that! No one understands feelings."
"Anyway, what sexuality do you think dear old Malfoy is?"
"How is that in any way relevant?"
"Oh, it's entirely relevant. I think it's time we unleashed levicorpus. With a twist. Tell me Hermione, in your professional opinion, is Malfoy straight or gay?"
"I'm not a professional."
"You're a girl aren't you? Well at least I think you are…"
"Harry James Potter! I am every inch a lady! How dare you say such a thing to me of all people?"
Harry then did something incredibly stupid. Before Hermione could get into her stride Harry marched right up to her and kissed her firmly on the lips.
She blushed furiously…before hitting him.
"He's straight, Harry." She said in a very small voice. Before running into the bathroom and barricading herself in.
All of the boys grinned as they heard her scream of glee.
"Straight…right…that should help matters." Harry laughed and the boys gave him the look that plainly said 'Tell us now or face being teased forever about you kissing Hermione on the lips.'
"Hermione isn't the only person to get a kiss from me. Tell me, Dean, you live in a muggle home don't you, like me?"
Dean nodded.
"Well, have you seen the entertainingly terrible film, Spiderman?"
Harry watched him as he put two and two together. Unsurprisingly his answer came to five.
Harry's did too.
Their laughs started as chuckles and then they grew until they were rolling around on the floor.
A glance up at Ron and Seamus' confused faces made them laugh more.
Hermione re entered quietly and stared at them. For once the Hermione Granger was baffled.
