Several Hours Later…

"Are you sure you've done this before?" I asked uncertainly for probably the third time in five minutes as Patsy fiddled calmly at the locked car door before shrugging nonchalantly as she inserted the tool into the lock for the umpteenth time. Quirking an eyebrow up at me she 'hruuuummphed' as she continued her work with a smirk. I just looked at her and frowned before glancing scrupulously at the release papers I held in my hand.

"And are you sure that my family knows about the hospital releasing me?" I queried doubtfully as Patsy threw her arms up in the air before rolling her eyes dramatically.

"Geez, Harrison! We've got trust issues don't we? Here call your mom if you'd like." She mumbled irately. "Jamie was supposed to come but there were some…um…issues at the studio so I got stuck "Driving Miss Daisy.' Alrighty then?" She finished as the lock finally gave way with a resounding click. Throwing me a triumphant 'ain't I good' look, she climbed into the driver's side before unlocking all the doors and fiddling with something underneath the dashboard. I took a deep breath and glanced once more behind me before berating myself for being foolish. The car roared to life as I threw the passenger door open, climbing in and shutting it hurriedly behind me before I changed my mind.

"Halt!" Holding my hand up like an air traffic controller

Okay, now then. Let's stop a moment so that I may point out this uncanny ability I have to find myself in compromising situations. I mean, what is it about some decisions that have a tendency to come back and slap us soundly in the face before asking us to turn the other cheek so that they can do it again? Let's just say I was having one of those moments when five minutes into the ride I realized rather belatedly that there were no keys hanging from the driver's side ignition.

"What the hell?" I almost screamed as Patsy threw me an innocent 'what' look before turning her attention back to the road.

"Would you believe me if I said I lost my keys and so, therefore, I'm having to, I don't know, get creative as I go?" Patsy asked with a shrug as I stared at her in absolute shock.

"What is this? The Twilight Zone because seriously there has got to be some sort of rip in the time/space continuum. Otherwise, I wouldn't be leaving the hospital after being beat up to a pulp by female psychopaths only to climb into a freakin' stolen car with a delusional kleptomaniac!" I yelled as Patsy grinned calmly.

"Touche.' She said with a small shake of her head as I just glanced at her in rigid astonishment.

"Seriously, Patsy. Are you that delusional?" I asked with trepidation as I realized I was having quite a case of déjà vu. Patsy didn't move her head as she made a turn around a corner, glancing suddenly into the rearview mirror before stepping harder on the gas peddle. I looked behind me with a wince when I recognized a police car patrolling our tail probably to get a read on our tag number.

"Oh dear God!" I gasped as I lowered myself as far down into the passenger seat as my cracked rib would allow me. Patsy smiled broadly.

"Hold on!" She said with a 'whoop' as she took a corner sharply, making me very very glad I had remembered to buckle my seat belt.

"Oh, I'm so glad you're entertained. Yep, just makes the situation so much better, wouldn't you say." I remarked sarcastically as I grabbed a hold of the dashboard to keep myself from sliding off the seat. Patsy nodded thoughtfully as if agreeing with me before reaching in front of her and turning on the radio. Heavy metal blared from the speakers before I reached over and switched it off huffily.

"What's wrong with you?" I yelled furiously as another sharp turn and a loud siren later signaled the cop had figured out something was not right. Patsy studied the road furiously as she drove like a wild woman.

"Jamie and I had a fight." She said flatly as I processed the information and then stared at her in bewilderment.

"Okay, let me explain something to you very slowly, Patsy." I said uneasily as the cop car almost hit our bumper. "Normal fighting couples buy flowers or chocolates for each other. You know, the kind with little Hallmark sayings written all over them. They do not, I repeat, do not steal automobiles." I said on a final note as Patsy took in a deep breath and began to visibly slow down. I breathed a sigh of relief as she pulled over onto the curb allowing the cop to pull in behind us.

"So, I'm not normal. Sue me." She said quietly as the cop stepped out of his car with his hand resting easily on his gun holster. Oh, yeah. Things just kept getting better and better.

"Well, you might get your chance. If there is even one scratch on this vehicle, I'm sure the owner will take you for every penny you have if we aren't still in prison." I said wearily as the cop approached Patsy's side of the car.

"Step out with your hands up!" He shouted as Patsy and I both glanced at each other one more time before stepping slowly out of the car with our fingers reaching for the sky. I was so not in the mood for this, and I had to bite my lip and draw blood to keep from crying as my ribs protested against the movement. What is it about Patsy that always manages to land me in a jail cell? The officer frisked us both and I winced as his fingers ran over my ribs. My arms were as high as I could get them (which was basically as high as my shoulders), but obviously the cop didn't think they were high enough because he was about to jerk them higher when Patsy moved slowly beside me.

"Don't!" She said loudly. "She had nothing to do with this. I was picking her up from the hospital before I stole the car. If you don't believe me, then you can look and see her discharge papers on the floorboard of the car." She finished with a quirk of her brow as the cop hesitated a moment.

"Okay." He said quietly before handcuffing Patsy and shoving me to the side of the vehicle.

"Hand me the papers." He demanded shortly as I leaned over and grabbed the release documents from the car. He read over them slowly before looking me over speculatively.

"You had no idea this car was stolen?" He asked a minute later as I looked at him sullenly.

"Yeah, about five minutes after I entered the vehicle." I stated sarcastically as the officer nodded and headed back to Patsy. He shoved her indelicately into the back seat of his car while speaking hurriedly into his radio. I watched a moment, glad that I wasn't going to end up in prison, but battling with myself about the defeated look I saw on Patsy's face. "oh Hell!" I thought to myself as I walked over to the cop authoritatively.

"Okay, so I may not have known I was in a stolen vehicle, but she is my friend, strange as that may seem, and I won't let her go to where ever you're taking her alone. So, mind if I join you?" I asked pleasantly, not giving him a chance to answer as I opened the car door and slid into the passenger seat next to where he would be sitting. He rolled his eyes and shrugged his shoulders before opening the door and climbing in. Note to self: Try talking Patsy into going to therapy. I thought gloomily as I watched the cop pull away from the curb. This was going to be a long night.