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By the time Rachel woke up on Saturday morning, it was already daylight. She had reluctantly allowed Eddie to turn off the alarm clock last night. She had a lot of work to do, yet even she recognised that she could not do it properly without sleep. Eddie had already left to visit Michael, and she stretched herself out in bed, looking forward to a quiet day by herself.

Having craved the quiet, she now realised she did not like it all that much any more. At around 3pm she had gone down to the kitchen to look for something to eat. She opened the fridge, hoping to find something quick and easy she could pick at to keep her going until Eddie got home. And there, she found a sandwich on a plate, covered in clingfilm, with a label on it saying, "eat me." She smiled at the effort he had gone to, knowing that she probably would not bother unless he did. She took it upstairs and took a bite. It was a very nice sandwich.

Eddie finally arrived home and she rushed downstairs, pleased to see him home. He was always in such a good mood after his Saturdays with Michael, and she wanted to hear all about it – not only because she enjoyed hearing about Michael, but also because she loved the way Eddie's face lit up when he talked about his son. Over coffee, he told her all about it.

As usual, Rachel had gone to bed a couple of hours before Eddie joined her. He tried to be as quiet as possible, but he accidentally woke her. He took the opportunity to wrap his arms around her and snuggle up to her back. "So," she asked, "what happened between you and John?"

"It's a long story," replied Eddie, reluctant to spoil the evening with a conversation about his row with his brother.

"It's a long night," Rachel countered.

Eddie realised he was not going to get out of this. The trouble was, he was still angry about what John had said to him, right at the time when he needed his brother the most. And after everything he had done for him as well. He did not want to get Rachel riled up this late at night, just after her first week back at work. Though she had tried her best not to let on, Eddie had noticed how exhausted she was after work, how early she fell asleep, and how her struggle to get up in the morning increased as the week had gone on. His days of coming home from work to dinner on the table were over – although he was secretly quite pleased to take back his place in the kitchen.

"He said I was an idiot," said Eddie after a long pause.

"Well," said Rachel, knowing there must be more to it than this, "were you?"

At any other time he would have immediately answered that no, of course he was not an idiot. But hearing the question from Rachel made him stop and think. "I didn't handle the situation optimally," he acknowledged after a long pause.

"What situation was it?" she asked.

"When I left Alison . . . and Michael."

"Ah," she replied, she had some knowledge of what had gone on at that time, and how Eddie had come to regret leaving his child. "That was a bit harsh, but did you ever stop to think that maybe he had a point?"

Eddie replied, "not really, until about two minutes ago."

They both fell silent for a few minutes, each lost in their own thoughts. Rachel was racking her brains for a solution to Eddie's estrangement from his brother. Eddie was starting to realise what an idiot he really had been. Not only had he lost his dear baby boy, relinquished any relationship with his wife and his son, but he had also pushed his brother away when he needed him most. What Eddie took as harsh words were probably just John's clumsy way of trying to prevent the situation that followed. He realised he had massively over-reacted.

Rachel rolled over to face him and found tears in his eyes. She stroked his cheek and he pulled her toward him, desperate not to mess up this relationship as well. Maybe if he had shown more understanding, he could have saved his marriage with Alison. Nevertheless, too much damage had been done there and that ship had long sailed. But after the dark clouds of the loss of Stephen, he finally had some happiness in his life again, with Rachel, and his renewed relationship with Michael. He never wanted to let Rachel go. And as she lay beside him, she too hoped that he never would.

He lay, listening to her breaths, knowing she was asleep now. There were too many thoughts in his head for him to sleep, but her presence was calming. He thought back to what he and John had endured, and knew that he would one day feel able to tell Rachel about it, even if it probably would not be that soon. John was his one constant throughout it all, and Eddie knew he needed him back in his life again. And he knew that Rachel would give him the strength to do it. Because he had, indeed, been an idiot.