Chapter 6
September 15th, 2021
"By next week, you'll need to prepare two sides of your debate topic. All the details are in these handouts. And don't forget your reference like last time," Rory spoke, speaking to a class of 12th graders.
"I'll now announce the teams. Mr. Rodrigues and Mr. Albert," Rory began, handing out the assignment instructions to each of the teams. "Mr. Mccoy and Ms. Cantrell, Ms. Burrows and Ms. Albert, Mr. Simons and Mr. Williams," she continued down her list of students.
Matching students up in pairs was more complicated than people thought. It was about making sure that the teams would be productive, each of the team mates offered each other something, a weaker student enabling the stronger one to put his or her tutoring skills into work but not pulling the former's grade down. Sometimes this involved avoiding groups that had evident sexual tension - even in the 10th grade these little social aspects were all too evident to the teachers. Who liked whom, and who was disliked, or misunderstood - even if there was a zero tolerance on bullying. There were ways group assignments like this could help, at least ease things. It was more than once that Rory had ended up using the same methods her teachers had applied on her and Pairs, for example. They'd ended up pushing each other, being each-other's rabbits in their personal chases. Rory now knew perfectly how little by little those methods had indeed worked. Not only had they become friends, but both had gained an invaluable skill of working with people very different from them.
"And finally… Mr Hodson and Ms. Cowan," Rory sighed, not being entirely happy with that match. It felt like putting her teenage self and Tristian DuGray in the same group, but as another one of her students had just had been transferred away from her AP English she was stuck with the two that were left on her list. It was her fault - she could've redivided all of the groups, but she'd been in a hurry that morning.
Her reasons for hurrying weren't really terribly admirable though, to be frank. But she'd been pleasantly surprised what fun it had been swiping right and left on her dating app and actually getting a few matches. She was yet to actually contact any of them - it was like knowing that there was interest without actually needing to take it a step further. For the moment that feeling sufficed, lifting her self-esteem.
The bell rang and her students poured out of her classroom with her just saying a few parting words in encouragement.
Rory had a free period next, so she was in no real hurry to get out of her classroom. The break room could be fun, but she didn't really go there every day sometimes just liking her alone time. She glanced at her phone, in passing, while putting the things away she'd had at hand for her class. Her drawer held her sandwich and a fruit smoothie, the latter being a habit she'd been stuck with ever since expecting Em. At least it had made both Jess and Luke happy to see her have one healthy thing on her menu.
She sat and got comfortable, putting her earphones on with a Fiona Apple album, before taking a bite of her sandwich, and casually browsed her newsfeed. Before she knew it she was clicking on an advert about a music festival in New York City that weekend with a number of musicians she would've liked to see. She hadn't been to the City in ages, at least since the beginning of the summer when she'd been there for the birthday of Paris' kids with Em.
Her first thought was Paris, naturally, as whenever she went to town that was where she stayed. But as she thought about it more, she didn't really need Paris to come with her. The thought of even going alone wasn't that horrible. This was a skill she'd mastered when she truly had been alone against the world, after college and before Hamburg… she'd learned to enjoy things she liked even without having company around. She'd seen the Nutcracker alone, she'd gone to art shows and concerts even. But right now, as she sat there at her work desk, Rory was quite puzzled why she had stopped doing that. Why hadn't she thought about going to the city by herself on one of her free weekends - she would've loved to see a Broadway show, shop, even just go to the library - when had she become such a homebody? Why was her enjoyment so focused on having someone to do these things with?
Briefly it connected in her mind also that Finn too lived in the city, and she could in fact inquire for recommendations for dinner or later for a party, or even ask what he was up to. But she wasn't sure she wanted to be that forward. She wasn't sure if it was just her mother's words that were in her mind or whether there was something more to this. Had she ever actually gotten a signal from him that he might be interested? Finn was always physical, small touches, hugs and tugs, and his speech was certainly filled with affirmations. But that was just Finn, wasn't it?
"What are you doing this weekend?" Rory texted Paris, deciding to start with the easier part.
"I was thinking of coming to the City on Saturday," she added, pasting a link of the event she was interested in.
Paris didn't reply in an instant, surely she was in a meeting of some sort. It was in the middle of the day.
Her phone beeped when she'd finished her meal, and was just wiping her mouth clean.
"I'm taking the kids to their Judo tournament in Baltimore," Paris replied. "But you're welcome to stay, the place is yours to use," she added.
Paris' child raising style was certainly just as competitive as it had been for Paris herself in that age - sports, music and academics, but it seemed her kids were much like her too - they actually seemed to thrive in those conditions.
It wasn't the first time she would be crashing Paris' place when she wasn't around, and Rory's plan to actually go see a concert or two on her own was gathering definite momentum. She wouldn't even have to get herself a date in a rush, not yet feeling up to it, but she certainly wouldn't get caught by Jess by sitting home with a good book if she didn't. It was so much easier to keep up a lie when she was out of town, she would even have events to tell him about, even if there was no guy in sight.
"I will. Thanks. Good luck to Gabriela and Timoteo!" Rory replied. She had a key, so that part was covered.
Rory purchased herself some tickets and leaned back on her chair, feeling unexpectedly good about herself. She was doing something for her and her alone.
September 18th, 2021
It was Saturday afternoon when Rory, having first and foremost slept late and then having gone shopping in a few of her favourite shops in Lenox Hill, arrived at Paris' five story Pre-War townhouse in the Upper East Side. Now the place at least had an elevator, Paris having stopped giving a crap about what Doyle thought about the building's integrity.
She took the elevator to the fifth floor where the guest room was. Paris' place was meticulously decorated as usual, everything clean and tidy. It hardly looked like people lived there, let alone a couple of 8-year-olds.
Rory hung up the blue silk blouse, sexy but not over the top, she'd bought for herself, and was planning to wear a pair of high-waisted dark pants. She wasn't out to hook up as such, but she wanted to look nice for herself. At least that's what she was telling herself. She was planning on wearing just a simple pair of ear cuff earrings, and a comfortable pair of heels in case she wanted to walk. In Manhattan she'd often liked to walk and people watch in the past.
She showered and browsed her phone thinking where she might want to go for dinner. Now, going to dinner alone was something she didn't look forward to that much, and she almost considered ordering take out.
"What am I doing?" she suddenly asked herself, realizing that essentially she was still hiding out. It would take so little of her to just stay in at Paris' and not to put herself out there, even if it was as she kept saying to herself - just for her.
Surely, it would've been odd not to at least ask what Finn was up to? Or tell him she was in town by herself. If she wanted a clear sign, she was supposed to test that hypothesis, wasn't she?
"Guess where I am?" Rory texted Finn, holding her breath.
She saw him read the message right away, and it felt like the longest 20 seconds as he typed.
"Paris?" Finn shot back, humorously.
"Very close. I am at Paris' house in UES," Rory replied.
The next moment Rory's phone rang as Finn called her on Facetime, having not wanted to keep typing. Roy quickly felt the need to cover herself up, and pulled on one of the guest robes. That was not quite what she'd planned - she had no makeup on, her wet hair was simply combed back. But then again - it wasn't like he hadn't seen her in all kinds of states until now. She hadn't really cared until now.
"Hey," Rory chimed, trying not to show how nervous she was. But strangely she was.
"Now what brings a girl like you into my neck of the woods?" Finn inquired. He was moving about somewhere on the streets of New York, as far as Rory could tell from his background.
"I decided to treat myself to a concert, actually," Rory explained, continuing to clarify which performers she'd meant.
"Do you have plans for dinner?" Finn asked, generously.
Deep down Rory let out a sigh of relief. She hadn't had to ask.
"Actually, no, that was kind of what I was hoping to ask you," Rory replied with a hesitant smile.
They met up an hour and forty five minutes later by the Essex market, Rory having struggled with getting a Uber as quickly as she hoped. But Finn was waiting patiently, wearing a pair of tight jeans and dark dress shirt, his blazer thrown over his shoulder.
They hugged in greeting like they always did.
"Wow, you certainly look ready for a night out," Finn commented.
"Ah, I just felt I needed to do something different," Rory explained, smilingly. Finn did look kind of handsome like that - well, he'd never looked bad to the eye, but truth be told she had never really looked at him that way.
Finn led her to a quite unexpected little restaurant that was surprisingly busy, hence making Rory think she was someplace fairly exclusive, despite its location which might have just hinted at something casual. The aroma of the place explained things to Rory before the place's name or moder interior design did. Indian - for sure.
While Finn talked to the hostess, Rory wondered whether his choice of place was indeed derived from her or was this just a coincidence that they were there. Did he remember that Indian was her secret love, which nearly everyone else in her life hated? If he did, maybe Lorelai had really been onto something.
They ordered Doh Khleh and Paplet Fry, Lasooni prawns and a special serving of Murgh Kofta which Finn recommended. Finn certainly wasn't one to judge Rory by her food consumption habits, he was long used to that, making Rory feel relieved by at least not having to explain that to someone new.
But what Rory struggled a bit at first was the conversation topics. She'd just seen him a week ago, hence their typical catching up was covered, and she was still not too sure about actually asking him date-like questions like 'What's your favourite movie?' or "Who is the person you admire the most?" which frankly just would've felt off.
Thankfully, Finn was never really one to be short of words, filling the silence with ease by talking about what he'd been up to that work, going a bit more into his Hotel business. He inquired about the concerts Rory was planning on seeing that night and pitched in with some of his own experiences. Finn was well connected, often if not knowing the actual performers then their managers or the owners of the clubs they played in. He was one never short of stories, that was for sure.
As he talked, and Rory listened, asking some follow up questions and offering her two cents, she also tried to consciously engage in eye contact, trying to figure out if there was more to this.
Finn treated her like a date, making sure her needs were taken care of by the waiters first and foremost, but there was no physical contact as such, which would've made things clearer, leaving her just as confused as before.
They were just about through with the main course, both of them having gotten an extra drink in replacement of their dessert, which this place didn't offer, when Rory suddenly said, "Don't you ever feel lonely in this city?" surprising herself with going right in the core of the problem.
"I mean… When I was living in the City, I was going out a lot, working a lot. I was around a lot of people, I interacted with many on a daily basis, but at the end of the night it was just me in my room at my Brooklyn apartment. My roommate was probably heading out, and the other one was at work… it found it so difficult to really connect with anyone here," Rory explained, sensing her statement may have sounded weird coming so out of the blue.
"Well it can be sometimes," Finn admitted. "I guess it's one of the reasons I like to go visit my sister. Family is important to me, unlike for most of the other guys..," he added, referring to Colin, Robert and Logan, while not specifically pointing any of them out.
Rory could read a number of things out of that statement, if she really tried - even perhaps that coming to see her, sometimes every couple of weeks, sometimes once a month, was a part of that escape. If she went along that train of thought he really could be interested in her. But she couldn't really understand in that case why he had never made more of a move - Finn certainly knew how, he wasn't some unconfident guy who had trouble approaching anyone, not even a supermodel. The only reason she could think of was him sticking to some bro-code or fearing for their friendship.
"You've told me a bit about your sister… she had, what, two kids, right?" Rory inquired, deciding to show some interest.
Finn happily shared several stories about the way he'd been brought up, several parts of which Rory hadn't really heard about before. He'd been raised in Australia, but most of his family had moved to the States when he was almost through with high school.
He'd offered to pay for Rory, again making Rory hesitate, but eventually they'd agreed Finn would pay, and Rory would owe him next time, leaving the latter rather vague. Hence Rory was left with an impression that this little dinner resembled more a date than just two friends having dinner.
"So are you meeting someone at the concert or...?" Finn asked as they made their way out of the restaurant an hour later, having held up their table a little longer than they were probably supposed to. But Finn had left an appreciative tip, so that hadn't been an issue.
"Actually no, just me..," Rory shrugged, innocently.
"I was thinking of going to a club later on, but I have no real obligation... If it's not something you want to go to by yourself, I could tag along," Finn offered, casually.
Rory really couldn't tell whether he was just being friendly, offering his company like that, or was it something more. It was one step forward and one or two back in her mind.
The concert was at Terminal 5, and Finn scored some tickets mostly thanks to his name, the venue being already packed to the brink. There was a fairly casual brush against the small of her back as he led Rory through the crowd, causing a tiny tingle on her skin. But it was not like Finn had never done that before.
The Swedish singer Léon was amazing in her low voice and haunting melodies, and Rory loved the orange-pink light show that suited the music perfectly. They swayed, doing the simple stepping from one foot to another, in the crowd, taking in the concert, even casting an occasional look and smile in the other's direction.
It was as the concert ended, the singer coming back for two extra songs, and the crowd finished clapping,when Rory felt a surge of energy. She'd done it - she'd gone out and done something for herself. She'd loved it - both the dinner, the music and for not having to lie to Jess about her whereabouts.
There was a moment as someone was passing by them, a surge of people moving towards the exit, when she and Finn were pushed together unexpectedly and the way Finn smiled just made Rory want to amplify that surge of energy she'd just felt.
Rory kissed him - just like that.
It was a sweet little peck, her lips perhaps only making minor movement against his, while his were almost completely still. But just like that it felt like the music that still echoed in her ears was winded down, sounding very-very off. There just wasn't that spark that she had hoped for.
"I'm so sorry," Rory said, and fled. She couldn't believe she'd done that.
"Rory!" Finn called after her.
Rory rushed to the near-empty women's bathroom, feeling embarrassed, hiding herself in one of the stalls, hyperventilating.
"Fuck..," Rory muttered to herself. "Crap.. sh..," she mumbled to herself.
The bathroom door swung and as the bathroom had emptied of guests by then, she heard Finn's voice. "Rory, are you alright in there?" Finn asked.
"Beam me up, Scotty," Rory mumbled, weakly, ready to be swallowed up by the ground.
"Oh come on… it's not the end of the world, is it?" Finn exhaled. "Can we at least get out of here and just have a drink?" Finn offered, sensing the awkwardness of the situation.
"I'm so sorry… I just..," Rory said as she barely dared to look him in the eye as she emerged. She washed has hand - feeling weird to not do, making Finn chuckle slightly.
"Rory, I love you - but not like that. You're like my sister, honestly you're one of my best friends even if we don't see each other that often. And I guess I can see why you may have thought more of this… I just hope you're not hurt by this…," Finn explained.
"I don't even know where that came from, I wasn't sure...," Rory replied, actually feeling relieved. It would've been way worse if he'd actually had hopes for more and she just hadn't felt it.
"Come one, I think we both just need to grab a drink and learn to laugh about this," Finn sighed, placing his arm around her shoulders and led her out of the bathroom.
