AN: Double treat for you guys today. But it's a bit of a filler I guess, just to demonstrate that Rory's life doesn't begin and end with Logan. His time will come. Some explanation as to why I am delaying it is also in Rory's thoughts.
Chapter 20
October 10th, 2021
Rory hadn't quite realized how much needed the talk with Logan had been. One might think that something from five years ago was long since forgotten, hurt feelings left behind. But it was only now Rory felt like some fog from that time had begun to scattered.
Despite having figured Logan's relationship with Odette had had a fair amount of flexibility to it, like his explanation had confirmed, it had still felt like he'd chosen Odette over her. It had felt like he hadn't ever wanted anything else than their arrangement. But Logan had dealt with the circumstances he lived in. Rory really wouldn't have been able to offer him what was expected of him, not the way Odette could. So she actually understood his choice. Rory knew she wasn't faultless in any of this either. She'd been too scared to get hurt, to even let him entertain the thought of anything more. But in the end she'd gotten hurt anyway. One was one's worst enemy, I guess.
Rory thought these thoughts as she stared at her bedroom ceiling the next morning, having slept late.
The talk had been exhausting, as if a movie of both of their separate lives had been stretched out in front of their eyes. Things said and left unsaid, paths chosen and carried out, things having not always worked out the way one had planned - and these seemed to be universal, independent of income, status or the family name. No matter what one did, one still craved for understanding, self-realization, simple happiness and a deeper love which neither had yet found. Not the kind that was fully honest at least.
Still - the blank spot on a map of her past, her memories, the one spot on that map she never really dared to look at too closely, one that hadn't been mentioned by name in a long time, was no longer blank, instead it was beginning to blend in with its surroundings - mending.
She stretched herself out and got up, opening the window ignoring the slight chill. It felt the next blow of the wind carried away that hurt she'd carried for so long into the rustling maple leaves.
Rory put on a recommended playlist from her phone which connected to the bluetooth speakers she had around the house, the list starting with Kodaline's 'Big Bad World', and she went ahead with her day, while looking through the photos Jess had sent her of Em, standing on the top of a platform quite high up for her age, all strapped up by climbing harnesses and wearing a cute pink helmet, looking like she wasn't afraid one bit. Rory felt proud.
"She looks so brave," Rory texted Jess. "Thanks for taking her," she added.
"Anytime," Jess replied in an instant.
"I'll pick her up around 7," Rory texted.
Jess replied with a simple thumbs up.
Rory showered and headed downstairs, last night's conversation, in part, still popping into her mind.
She didn't envy Logan's situation right now. For one, Honor was excellent at giving his brother a scolding, some of which he probably kind of deserved too. But more than anything Rory knew what the feeling of having everything wide open for oneself felt like. Logan was standing at a crossroads - everything was possible. While it could be a good feeling. She knew, she'd craved it so many times, while at first having been afraid of it too. But at their age, it was a little daunting to be starting everything over from scratch too. And while she knew Logan had done it before, this felt bigger and more final in his case.
Whatever Logan chose, he needed to figure that out on his own. How was it her therapist had put it once? Fix yourself first before you involve others. She truly hoped he'd pick well and choose a path that would make him happy.
In that refreshing and hopeful state of mind, Rory wasn't even bothered about having gotten her period - it being just another normal thing - and popped a Ibuprofen and made herself a cup of coffee whipped cream as a treat, and settled onto her couch to properly read the New York times.
It was four hours later Rory was parking her car at the Crown Street Garage in New Haven, thankfully having found a spot on the first floor. She had worn a black slim knit sleeveless midi dress, with sexy slit reaching midway up her thigh and a floral polka dot bomber over it. A hint of something fun and playful over something a little sexier.
Seeing Logan hadn't changed how Rory felt about her need to move forward. Besides, Logan had enough on his plate, she was sure, to even think about dating, let alone think about dating her, which would've been like falling into the same pit of shards for the third time for the both of them. One just didn't do that kind of thing, not lightly at least. Besides, they were not exactly the same people they once were either.
"Hey, I hope I wasn't late," Rory said apologetically, and hugged Seth in greeting, meeting him where they'd agreed.
"Hey. Not at all," Seth replied, smilingly and took a long appreciative look over her outfit. "I have to say you look sensational, Rory," he said.
"Why thank you," Rory replied, smilingly, feeling flattered. It felt nice to be subject to something uncomplicated that made her feel good.
They headed into the Criterion Cinema, a place where Rory had been many times during her college times. Thankfully those memories were not particularly person-specific, she'd been there with Lane, her mom, Olivia and Lucy and so forth.
"I hope you didn't mind driving all the way here for this," Seth said, feeling a little bad about taking her offer to come to New Haven instead of going to pick her up and seeing a movie in Hartford, and held open the door for her. He figured Rory had felt a little guilty for some radio silence which had caused that decision.
"Oh, nonsense - besides, I might actually get away with not seeing any of my students here," Rory replied, sounding relieved. Besides, she hadn't minded a short drive and a change of scenery.
"My students, however..," Seth began and nodded silently to the opposite corner of the lounge area.
Rory looked over her shoulder seeing a couple of college girls and one guy, chatting.
"That's the trouble with being an educator I guess. There are the ones you don't want to see and don't want to see you outside of work, and then there are those who can't wait to steal your weekend away. Just be thankful you don't have to deal with the parents much, they definitely always want to see me after work," Rory chuckled.
"Can't say I envy that," Seth replied, laughingly, keeping up a pleasant small-talk.
It was warm inside, so Seth took off his coat, exposing a rugged black button-up shirt. The sleeves of the shirt were turned up, which showed off his lean forearms. Definitely not a bad look. Little by little the image she'd had of Seth as someone geeky was exchanging for the man he was today.
They soon headed inside to watch "The Sterling" and Rory made a purposeful move to take off her jacket before sitting down, exposing her delicate arms and shoulder, which was one of her better traits in her appearance in her opinion, secretly watching Seth for a reaction. She was enjoying seeing him smile at this more than she'd expected.
She hadn't read up much on the movie other than simply having checked the list of actors, which looked promising. It was a beautiful movie, with great cinematography and music, but it was sad, showing a couple who had lost their newborn daughter to SIDS. The man had tried to kill himself as a result and had ended up in a mental institution. Not perhaps the best movie for a date. It wasn't that she had really time to worry about though, but rather struggled to hold back her sniffles at a few sad scenes that dealt with the mother's loss of a child.
"You okay?" Seth asked Rory in whisper, seeing her shed a few tears at one point.
"Oh yeah," she whispered, apologetically. "Been just a little emotional today," she added. She didn't even have to lie - it was just her period that was affecting her like this, her love for Em transforming into feeling how it would've felt like to lose her like that, leaving other smaller losses aside.
"If you want we can just leave," Seth suggested, friendlily.
"Nah, it's fine," Rory replied quietly, and wiped her tears away.
It was then Seth held out his hand for her, offering it for her to hold. It was such a small and sweet thing to do - and she took it, quite enjoying the warm touch of another person, which definitely made her feel a little better.
As the movie ended Rory could tell Seth was becoming a little more brave in his small touches - grazing the small of her back as he held up the door for her on their way out for example.
"Well, definitely not the best date time movie, but it was good..," Rory said, apologetically, feeling a little embarrassed for having suggested this one with little research.
"Life isn't all fluff, I think we both know that by now," Seth replied, speaking from experience.
"True," Rory replied.
They went to grab a small bite, coffee and cake, it being a little early for a full dinner and too late for lunch, where they continued to talk about their lives - work and friends.
It was fun, and Rory was definitely enjoying this little sexual tension that had been forming between them. Like a little cat and mouse game - saying nothing direct but letting the subtext carry the mood.
"Shoot, I should get going soon," Rory noted the time, knowing it was a good 20 minute walk back to her car as well.
"It's too bad, I would've loved to show you my place. It's not really far from here," Seth didn't hold back.
Rory didn't mind his forwardness, not one bit.
"You know - I could actually say that I would've liked to see it too," she replied in a flirty tone. "But the timing is not the best. Hence the waterworks earlier too," she explained, humbly, hoping he'd understand. It was much easier to hide behind something physiological than just keep saying that she needed to go pick up her daughter or that she wasn't sure where she wanted this to go.
"It's okay - not a problem," Seth replied, understanding where she was coming from. After all he'd been married - he knew how these things worked.
But this date had at least shown her this much, that she wouldn't have minded one bit if it at least went that one step further. She creaved a human's touch, she had needs.
To prove it, Rory took a decisive step closer to him and kissed him. It was a small and gentle kiss, which Seth replied to with some more intensity, making Rory blush and her stomach flutter a little. He definitely wanted more of her, and this made Rory feel like a million bucks.
"So another time," Seth suggested, still staying close to her.
"Uh-uh," Rory nodded, her lips slightly redder than before from the kiss.
He walked her to her car and they parted with another kiss of the similar kind, definitely making Rory groan inside, having wanted to feel more as her libido suddenly felt very alive and excited by the idea of someone new.
"So when might I take you out again?" Seth asked.
"Next weekend I have Em, so it isn't ideal. But if you want we could do dinner on a weekday," Rory explained. Seth seemed to understand that she really didn't aim on introducing anyone to her daughter this early on.
"I'll have to check, a few of my classes got changed to the evening schedule. But I'll let you know, okay?" he offered.
"Sounds good," Rory replied, smilingly, and got into her car. This was going well in her opinion - he was nice, and there was definitely some chemistry there, she just wished their schedules weren't so conflicting.
