Disclaimer: I don't own Evangelion (yet). Thanks for all of the great reviews and special thanks for the writers of Asushin Discord for the support and great discussions.

In this chapter, continuing our Shikinami saga, another short parody of a famous TV series.

A little warning: in this one, I will be taking a serious risk of annoying some readers, since I will be dealing with major character's death and implied relationships that doesn't really fit with my views regarding the ending of Thrice Upon a Time (especially because of age differences).

If you catch the reference will know exactly what this parody is about and probably will be able to get a good laugh from it. If that is not the case, it might feel a little bit weird like... let's say... in a "Glass of Wine" way. But well, I think the premise of this series is exactly that isn't it? To tell a short story that can stand by itself and that can be better with the reference.

Also, since Shikinami Asushin is already a bittersweet and tragic story by itself, I will try to do something lighter and funnier in the next chapters, returning to explore some mainstream movies and also some old classic comedy movies.


"Dad! Dad… wake up".

"Uh, what is it?"

"Ive found this weird book when I was cleaning the garage. It seems like mama has written it, look at this dedication!"

Puppy. It seems that despite of my gorgeous body being young and pretty as ever, my mind and soul are already tired. You did well, thanks for caring. You are an adult now. Please, tell this story to them when I'm gone. It's your story. Your real story. They deserve to know everything about you and you must not run away from it. Oh, and when you do tell them, you should listen to their advice ok? Keep smelling great, will you?

The man sighed. "Well… I guess I need to tell you this story."


"So, this is the story about Rebuilding Evangelion. It was at times a long, difficult road. But I'm glad it was long and difficult, because if I hadn't gone through hell to get there, the lesson might not have been as clear."

"You see, kids, right from the moment I met your mom, I knew. Even then, in what can only be called the worst of times, she would come for me. All I could do was look at her and thank God, thank every god there is, or ever was, or will be, and the whole universe, and anyone else I can possibly thank that she fulfilled her promise."

"And since that day, every time I went down to that train station to regret my decision, she would be there to bring me back to the real world and tease me with her big pair of… glasses, reminding me of the day that she fell over me on a parachute. That's the point of this story. A story about how I met her".

"That's it?" - his daughter asks, saying she isn't buying it. -"Bullshit".

"Hey! Watch your language young lady!"

"Sorry dad. But sis is right. Let's look at the facts. Mom's hardly into this story at all. She was a side character at best. Also, it seems like she was grandma best friend, isn't it? That's gross. And your real name is Shinji and not H..."

"Stop it, boy!"

"He is right dad! This story appears to be just a lot of technobabble about giant robots but it's about the relationships that you had with your dad and your friends. No… in fact this is a story about how you're totally in love with this girl, Asuka, and she was into you too, but you guys were so dumb about it that, even with Mom's constant teasing."

The man blushes "No! It was not like that! I mean I was, but well… you see. Evangelion is a story that is so ambiguous and up to interpretation that I know that every person will have their own views, but the point of the story is that…"

"Is that you totally, totally, totally have the hots for this Asuka." – the girl said, defiantly.

He denies it again, and she insists, "Yes, you do."

"You're grounded," the man says, also grounding his son who says, "Wow, you really are totally into this redhead pirate princess. Come on Dad, even Mom was trying to push you guys together during the story."

He sighed and look at the twins. "Look… even if I was still interested in Asuka that way, I wouldn't do anything about it. We don't even know how the flow of time is in that universe. If she took my advice, she probably has move on and probably is living happily in another universe, and that is good enough for me. To know that she is happy it's e-enough for me."

"Dad... it's ok to cry." his daughter said "I mean, I cried a lot when we read that scene on the beach, so I can only imagine how hard it was for you."

"Yeah. Don't make the same mistake that Misato did. You saved several universes with your actions at huge personal cost. But now things are ok. You don't need to be a Buda anymore and sacrifice your happiness for the sake of the others. You don't need to be the exact opposite of grandpa to make things work. If there's a way to see her again, you should go for it. No matter if it's painful."

"Dad... I get that Grandpa almost sacrificed reality to be with the woman he loved and you choose to do the opposite but... it's also not healthy. Maybe happiness lays at the middle ground."

"Children, you... Ok, fine. You guys may have a point. But still... I can't. I have to take care of you guys, you're still young and…"

"C'mon, dad. You were fighting Eldritch abominations when you were 13 or 14 years old. We will be fine."

"Yeah. Since you guys have adopted us, Mom has raised us to be happier and smarter than you think. For example, we know that Mom has registered a bunched of patents on several different technologies that grants us a lot of money, so don't worry: we are mature and both financially and emotionally secure." - said the boy.

The man looked at the children, in disbelief. "Wow…. I guess that both of you have grown up before me, haven't you?"

"Dad. We can hold on our own until you find a way to bring us to your universe or bring her back to ours" his daughter says, adding with a smile, "Also, she told us that this day would come. Mom's been gone for years now. It's time. We will help you" – the girl told him, while showing him the odd choker that she had found with the book.


"Captain Shikinami! Pattern blue located at coordinates 1LA5TK11S. We need you to report to the Wunder, immediately."

"Commander Akagi? Can you confirm that these are the coordinates? Are you sure?"

"Yes… it just appeared from nowhere. "

"I'm going there right now. Alone. Make sure to isolate the perimeter and not let anyone get closer right?"

"What? No you shoul…".

"Over and out."


Shinji woke up inside of an entry plug as the sunlight hit his face.

Towering him over the exit of the entry plug was her.

Staring at him with an angry look, just like when she retrieved him from Unit-13 after the failed Fourth Impact and looking as beautiful as when he said goodbye to her on that beach.

"Before I punch your stupid face, I'll give you one chance to explain what are you doing here."

"Because… this is also my place to belong. And because goodbye is what you say to someone when you hope that you can see each other again."

They looked into each others eyes for a moment and smiled, as tears started to fall from their faces.

"I'm home, Asuka."

"Welcome home, baka-Shinji."