So, I work now. I am basically always tired. And I tried writing three stuff at once. It didn't come out right and I do not have it in me to check. Meh… I feel like I am supposed to say something else here but I am forgetting… I think there was something about how this story could get to 10 followers when I write the chapter after this, but I just got another follower a few minutes before posting this, so maybe I'll get to 10 followers this chapter? Might be hoping for too much…


"Two bells?"

"Yes, how very astute of you, Sakura. 10 points to you." Came the dry response.

"Yes!" The dry response was obviously taken too literally.

"What if Sasuke gets mad at you for having more points than him?"

Kakashi watched as the girl went from a hundred to zero quite fast, now being worried about something. She seemed… unstable.

Which was good, of course. Meant she wasn't a spy sent by the therapists.

"This is the bell test. My own variant of it, in fact. You WILL need to pass it in order to become a part of my team. I have absolutely no care for whatever score you got in the Academy." That last bit seemed to shut the pinkette up before she could speak. It was also somewhat of a lie. He had looked intensively into their backgrounds, mostly their time spent in the Academy. He had to make sure none had relations with the therapists. The pink-haired one did scare him as she was once friends with the future queen of the therapists but, looking at how unstable she seemed, he was sure she was safe from their grasps.

The broody one seemed stiff as cardboard next to the pinkette, and the blond? Why Kakashi wouldn't be too surprised if he managed to burst the air near him into flames with how fast he was vibrating.

'Vibration Release?' he pondered. It couldn't be possible for one to be excited enough to vibrate THAT much when sitting and attempting to stay still.

Of course, no such bloodline existed but one could never be too sure.

"I CAN'T WAIT TO WIN THIS!"

It had to be Vibration Release. He felt like his atoms were entirely rearranged after that yell.

"Stupid Naruto, don't you see how there are two bells? It obviously means only Sasuke and I can pass together!" If possible, he saw the broody one get even stiffer. It wasn't right for a man to be that stiff anywhere, so he decided to lend a hand.

After a moment of no hands moving, he realized that the supposed Vibration Release must have really messed up his ability to control his limbs. This would be a problem when he needs to change pages on his current Icha Icha book in 40 seconds.

His mouth worked, though, so he'd just advise them on what the test entailed.

"You must go and cause as much mayhem as possible in the base of the biggest monsters in Konoha. You must do this without anyone finding out it was you. You ABSOLUTELY must not leave evidence that could point towards me telling you to do this. Your end goal would be any type of trauma on the monsters. Being seen can result in failure, hence I'll give these two bells in the hopes that you may succeed with sound where you would not with visual effects or visual aid." That last part was bullshit, he just used the same old bells from his bell test but since he wasn't using the same test and was too broke after some very expensive Icha Icha signed edition expenses, he just didn't want to buy a third bell for something that would likely end in failure.

"Failure to do this means failing. Causing a bell-based or permanent trauma would mean that I will offer a gift to you guys. You have until this clock hits zero." His hands didn't move to show a clock… This would be problematic if he finished with the Icha Icha page…

The potential genins-to-be took that as there being an undefined time limit as they ran—or rather, the broody one ran like the hounds of hell were after him and the pink-haired one took both bells while chasing after him like said "hounds of hell" and yelling at him about how he forgot a bell. It was almost like the broody one was running from her… Almost.

Now… What on earth was this "hell" that he was thinking about? Odd…

And he reached the end of the Icha Icha page. Damn.

A breeze went through the clearing.

'Move the page. Move the page!' And the breeze stopped with no page being changed.

'Damn it!' If only he learned some advanced wind manipulation from those drug addict Sarutobis…

It was about now that he remembered the existence of the third and, the most annoying, genin-to-be. They lost most of their chances without him. It was a pity, really, he had read how the kid had taken down the traitor Mizuki and… the somewhat odd tactic of throwing hundreds of copies of his wallet at the traitor aside, he knew that the kid knew the Kage Bunshin no Jutsu. With that, they could go from 2 to 200 bells and cause true trauma causing things.

Looking at the kid, he wondered if he could get him to change the Icha Icha page.

Then again, that would count as showing a child very adult things under Konoha's very 'amazing' set of laws.

The kid looked pretty heartbroken from his teammates leaving him, he absently noted. Should he tell him that he can pass without the bells? Since he seemed to be assuming that after what the pinkette said to him earlier.

But, then, who'd help him change his page?

Slowly, an idea started to form in his mind.

A genin was somewhat an adult by village laws… He wouldn't be judged badly—well… not TOO badly, anyways, if he asked a genin for help with changing an Icha Icha page.

Trying to move a hand again and still failing, he knew what he had to do.

He was gonna lie a lot when he got back to the Hokage's office about how Naruto passed the test in the first few seconds.

"Yo, kid."

Startled the blond went from depressed to vibrating again. His Vibration Release chakra must be charging up again, he mused.

"Yeah, sensei!?"

"Could you help me with changing a page? I got some trouble with my arm. It's wet and would ruin the page."

Surely, the kid would notice his arm wasn't wet.

As the kid quickly came near him, he realized that, no, the kid wouldn't notice his lie…

Well, calling him a kid wouldn't be right after he had seen the page, would it?

It occurred to him that he couldn't just take Naruto if he passed him, he'd have to pass the entire team… Oh well… The things he did for the good of Icha Icha time.


(Sasuke POV)

I never even bothered to hear everything, I ran the second I thought Sakura's attention was off me. I blundered.

Without Kakashi around to protect me, or at least without him around to be used as another body between her and me, I had nothing to save me. She was gaining on me. FAST.

There was only one person who was equal to Sakura in her cannibalistic desire to eat me—looking back and seeing her drooling while looking at me while holding something in her hand that she was waving at me, probably seasoning to eat me with, I panicked more. She was already getting ready to eat!—and that person was Ino Yamanaka. If I could get to Ino, there was a chance that they may fight each other and leave me a chance to escape.

Or they'll share you 50-50…

Ignoring the part of my mind that said I was doomed, I ran towards the closest feeling of doom.

Oh wait, that was Sakura.

I ran to the second closest source of doom: Ino.

My path took me through many civilians that Sakura literally ran through. Literally. And that literally was quite bad when one accounted for her forehead size.

'Fuck, fuck, fuck!'


(Sakura POV)

"Look at him. He is so dedicated to passing that he is already running towards his destination. Of course he knows who these 'monsters' are. He probably fights them before eating breakfast." I couldn't help but agree with Inner Sakura there.

Fueled by my love for Sasuke, I easily kept pace with him. I would later face charges for LITERALLY running through some civilians. As in, they had Sakura-shaped holes in them, but that's neither here nor there. A story for another time.

Inner cheered me on as I, unknown to me, got covered in guts, other vital organs, and enough blood to make me look like a red blur chasing after Sasuke. I, of course, would never find out that this is what made him run even faster—comedically, one might add—when he glanced back at me, not him making sure I was keeping up before going faster.

I almost stumbled to a stop when I realized where he was heading.

"No…"

"Yes, it makes sense."

"The Yamanaka Compound."

It made sense. It all did.

The Yamanakas were definitely the monsters Sensei was talking about when he told us about who to target. It all made so much sense now! I wanted to smack my face with how stupid I felt at how obvious it had been. Ino had shown how terrible Yamanakas could be when she decided to go after Sasuke just to break my heart. It was just a game to her! Some sick attempt to break me!

"... I mean, my existence sorta shows it wasn't so much an attempt as an alternative success."

Some sick success in breaking me, then! And once I was broken, I would never be able to get fixed because no Yamanaka would ever fix something their heiress broke. It all made sense now. They must have done something to Kakashi or someone he knew, too, and that's how he knew of their true nature.

But what is Sasuke doing!? He is running straight towards them, not even trying to hide the fact that he is going there!

Inner-Sakura just watched as Sakura thought this while doing much more destruction and generally being much more anti-stealthy in her approach.

'Give mother some blood to validate your existence,' Inner thought before blinking in a 'WTF' fashion.


(Elsewhere Same Time)

A being made of sand and chakra stirred.

"Did someone just steal my mojo?" it said in a stupified manner for a second. Before it finally settled in. "THEY MUST PAY."

Its host would go insane at the screams and would cause many deaths before it was stopped. The kill count would only truly go to Inner Sakura for causing the dominoes that caused this to fall, however.


(Same Time Elsewhere)

'Oooh, Kusina… Yes, Miato… Yes…' Kakashi thought as he read his book.

"Next page."

The newly minted genin did as he was asked.

Yes, Kakashi was still paralyzed. He almost panicked before he realized he could always have a clone of Naruto keep flipping the pages for him. The kid seemed pretty easy to fool. Of course, he'd die soon after, though, as he wasn't willing to let the kid feed him as that meant being unmasked. He'd rather die from starvation due to not being able to be fed due to the mask on his face than take it off. And, no, this was not why he had therapists after him and—he tried to look and left and right but failed to because of the paralysis—even a… psychologist or two, or three, or a hundred… He shuddered.

Oh wait, the shuddering was good; meant the paralysis was getting out of his system.

The kid had at one point asked why he was passed after he had had a fit of excitement and he may have even fainted at one point. Kakashi just made up some bullshit about how he showed patience in the fact that he waited, unlike his teammates, for Kakashi to give additional orders; like moving pages for him. And how a good genin showed a willingness to follow their superior's orders without complaint.

That last part was something he was patting himself on the back for as the kid hadn't complained so far because of it.

He might have if he knew just how much he accidentally read about his own conception from the brief glances he took while changing pages. Because, really, the names sorta made it obvious who it was about if you knew the people…

Didn't help that the descriptions seemed spot on and unchanged.

And that was the story of how Naruto Uzumaki got his team to pass while the rest of his team was still trying to pass when they didn't know they had.

"Next page."


(Back with Sakura and Sasuke)

Sasuke had gone from "running from the hounds of hell" speeds to "running from worse than the hounds of hell" speed when he glanced back at Sakura and saw just how much blood was on her. It gave him flashbacks to a darker night.

Probably didn't phase her, with her being a cannibal and all, at least from his perspective.

He almost let out a sigh of relief when he reached the Yamanaka Compound. He didn't, partially because the second impending source of doom was getting closer and there was the fact that he didn't like therapists and psychologists.


(Same Time Elsewhere)

"Achoo!" sneezed Kakashi. Which was very uncomfortable as he sneezed into the insides of his mask. He could have avoided that if he wasn't still paralyzed.

He felt a sense of joy and sympathy and empathy for one of his future students.

He made sure to remember to focus only on that student in the future and give them blatant favouritism.


(Back to the Chase)

The streets here weren't crowded with civilians so Sakura didn't run through them. That didn't stop her from bringing blood to the compound from previous blood dripping down her body and down various body parts/organs she 'carried' with her as she ran.

Finding his "second closest feeling of doom" sensor screaming at him, he jumped up, held on to a ledge, and pulled himself up. Then proceeding to grab the top of the outward extended open window, he pulled hard while running up the window sill—god bless it for not breaking—and parkoured his way to the roof. Pulling himself up via the grip he has on the edge of the roof, he was finally on top, and then he continued running. This wouldn't help with Sakura.

Suddenly, it got dark. Also, it may have started to rain? Wait… it was still bright everywhere except where he was running. It wasn't raining everywhere else, either.

Also... looking at a drop of oddly coloured rain that had fallen on his hard, was rain supposed to be red like blood?

Looking up while running, he was faced with the horrific sight of Sakura mid-descent, blood dripping from her, and the stuff she had around her, in large amounts to the point where one may mistake the area under her as having crimson rain. It wasn't dark, nor was it raining… it was her shadow on him! And that was blood!

Feeling faint, he felt something change. Something looked different. He wouldn't ever find out, but THIS was when he unlocked his Sharingan. Two tomoes in both eyes from the start, his father may have been happy. Or not. Not quite that surprising when one sees just what caused it to awaken.

Unfortunately, it would also burn the sight into his mind as his now crimson eyes stared at the descending pin—red blur coming down at him while he kept running.

So entranced—and horrified, mostly horrified—was he with the sight that he didn't look forward while running, thus he missed the gap between two houses that he was swiftly running towards.

"Gah—" Was the sound of surprise that came out of his as his foot failed to find purchase on its next step.

"Fuuuu—" was the sound that came out when, while he was starting to make his descent to the bottom of the apparent alleyway, he hit his head with the wall of the house/building that he was supposed to jump towards, his horizontal velocity still going quite strong, it was a wonder that he didn't go through the wall.

As he landed at the bottom of the alleyway, just barely missing the dumpster, he found himself wishing he had landed in the dumpster instead like all those heroes did in the stories his mother used to tell him. He also found out what it felt like to be 45 years older as his back gave extreme protest when he tried to get up, but no one could claim that Sasuke couldn't be stubborn, however, as he got past the pain. He knew that he had duped Sakura, if only for a second with that genius stunt—no one would ever get a confession out of him that he fell by accident and not by strategic movement—and with how many more seconds it would take for her to reach solid ground/roof, he may have a significant lead.

He could lose her in that much time, maybe… Maybe he wouldn't even have to get Ino involved.

And then he noted his head was bleeding. Quite badly, one might add. Huh… he was doomed, then. She would just smell the blood to wherever he was.

He started running through the alleyways, because Sakura was up on the rooftops and that was not where he wanted to be. To anyone in the world—yes, including S-Rank and above individuals—he was beyond a blur. But, then, both Sakura and him were… Both being empowered by the word count to do amazing feats that they otherwise would not be able to.

He eventually got to a place that radiated doom on such a level, that he may as well call it an equal to Sakura's level of doom. This was it. If he was gonna do this, he would have to time it right.

Feeling the second closest source of doom—now Sakura—get closer, he waited her out to make sure she'd reach him when Ino met him.

And then he felt something stir.

'Damn it! I forgot Ino can smell me out, too, when I am close by.' He just decided to jump into her room which was a few floors up. He climbed up to it, and this is where he sorta messed up. He broke through it, causing enough noise that even the neighbours must have heard it.

"Sa-Sasuke!?" A very dirty, tired-looking, and somewhat bruised up Ino said.

This was good, her genin test must have actually happened earlier and on time, unlike with Sasuke's one, so she was home. Her being tired could cause problems when he would have her fight Sakura but it would have to do.

He barely managed to move away from the window before Sakura burst in.

"Blood monster!"

"Ino-pig!"

"Wait," the blonde paused, "Sakura?"

"Uh, yeah, who else? Or have to become that much of a dumb blonde?"

Upon seeing Ino's eyebrows twitching, Sasuke saw his chance to leave.

BAMN!

"I heard glass breaking, are you alright, my sweet sunflower!?"

Her dad was here…

"You!"

And he had seen Sasuke.

He wanted to scream mentally. How didn't he see the blood and entrails Sakura brought with her!?

"You will not take my daughter's purity!"

And then he saw Sakura.

"AND YOU PLANNED ON DOING IT IN A THREESOME WITH A BLOOD MONSTER!?"

Sasuke wanted to die… Why would he go for someone that would eat him? While he was thinking about running or explaining himself—more towards running—the Yamanaka let loose his anger in the form of the most amount of damage he felt like he could do without being arrested or charged for it, and considering Sasuke broke into his house, he could get away with a lot.

"Mind Rearrangement Jutsu!" A jutsu meant to shift parts of the subconscious regarding stuff like what one may like, dislike, and other such stuff, Inoichi's goal was to make the man play for the other team or, at the very least, lose interest in all genders. All he managed to do was fix the earlier brain damage Sasuke got, by accident. Inoichi didn't realize how much he helped with the guy's mental stability rather than slightly warp it.

And then Sasuke collapsed. Having slight brain damage from hitting his head earlier hard enough to damage his brain, and then losing blood while running from his head, and then forcibly having his mind painfully—something intentional on Inoichi's part—shifted in an attempt to change it, which unintentionally fixed it, lead to a deep toll on the young—not that he knew it yet—genin.

Ino and Sakura stared at the unmoving, somewhat glass-stabbed form of Sasuke as it lay down on the glass-ridden floor in unison.

Ino, having some knowledge of how badly that technique, or rather any mind technique, could be used reached the worst conclusion.

Believing she wouldn't ever be seeing her beloved Sasuke again, she let out a brief scream reaching pitches higher than a civilian or any non-chakra enhanced ear could hear, and fainted. Her mind having been traumatised by the thought that her childhood crush had been permanently put in a coma in a very painful way while having been made gay before all that happened.

Sasuke unintentionally managed to complete the genin test Kakashi gave him. No one would claim that Kakashi sent him there with how he did it, and he did traumatise a Yamanaka by the end of it.

Sakura, seeing her rival-in-love faint, came to the conclusion that the technique used would kill someone or at least make them brain dead.

The scream, the screech, the UNGODLY sound that came out was seemingly the result of both Inner Sakura and Sakura, both screaming at the same time.


(Kakashi and Naruto)

Out of nowhere, the glass on the alarm clock broke. No, broke is the wrong word, it didn't just break apart, it broke apart into small enough pieces that the largest of which could be considered the size of a grain of sand. Kakashi's ears also happened to start bleeding at the same time.

What did this mean to Naruto?

"Woah! Sensei, you never told me you could make glass blow up by bleeding from the ears!"

Kakashi just blankly stared at him. 'Screech Release? Has to be.' Bloodlines developed all the time, why not?

Curse his heightened sense of hearing.


(Back to Yamanaka Compound)

Everyone was bleeding from the ears and were just thankful when the screech/scream went too high in pitch for them to hear. Of course, that only happened long after their deafening. Also, one could safely say that there was not a single piece of glass in the Leaf Village that had stayed in one piece.

Sasuke was lucky in the fact that he was already passed out by that point. His Uchiha status also got him to the hospital pretty fast, unlike many others that had suffered either from the sound or from glass-related wounds. Too bad for them that most of his issues were more mental based, something they wouldn't find out for a while as the person who inflicted them and the people who witnessed it were passed out as well. There was eventually a guess that a Yamanaka technique went wrong and that's why they were all unconscious.

The Yamanaka Compound also sustained heavy damage, if not glass-related then people related.

Kakashi would give his team a thumbs up and hug Sakura when he'd find out about it. Screw Sasuke's traumatizing of one Yamanaka, what Sakura did would heighten her status on the team for a long time.

And that long time wouldn't last very long when Kakashi would quickly realize that he didn't like how her voice grated on his nerves.

Reminder to self: put some useless Author Note here tomorrow. Also, this chapter with Sakura having guts on her convinced me to make the rating M.