On this chapter I completely cracked at one point and I am not entirely satisfied.

So on this ladies and gentlemen, with all your indulgence and sympathy, on an original idea from Korean Panda: Loki, logger (at the base of the idea)

Take out the lighters, it's going to get hot!


The breeding of billy goats was over for Loki! Folded, put away, forgotten, behind him. Far behind him. Mainly because it was too boring. And a little too much in the middle of nowhere in hindsight. And it made Tony laugh too much. Which was of course unacceptable for the Jotun.

So he had packed his bags again, he was starting to get used to it now. After the latest events, Loki had to get back to his priorities. Dominate the Earth. He found it hard to admit it, but the animals had distracted him from his main objective. He had to admit that a billy goat was still fun. Of course not when he was trying to eat his clothes, but otherwise, it was quite an entertaining animal. Finally, he had to stop being distracted so easily, it was ruining his business. So in order to refocus on his priority and his goal for so many years, controlling the middlemen, Loki had returned to New York feeling blue because of his previous failures.

After several days of intense blues under the suspicious eye of most Avengers, he had regained his lucidity and could now quietly prepare his next attempt. Being president hadn't been very effective, too many papers to fill out and agreements to sign before he could do what he wanted. And then having to deal with all kinds of boring stories all the time was a drag. Nyanyanya risks World War III, blah blah blah demonstrations that go awry... He needed a more ancestral method, more... Royal. Becoming King of Midgard was his new goal. He was going to become such a great king that mortals would rush to him to obey him. He should have thought of it sooner. In retrospect it was obvious and much more fun than the being president.

So he needed a crown, a jester and a castle. Loki stared at his brother who was fighting a toaster and mentally checked the second item on his list. Then he reflects calmly, ignoring the noise of the toaster that ends up embedded in the worktop and the screams of Stark that went with it. Where and how to make a castle, such were the questions. Should it launch a big construction site to compete with the castles of the Loire Valley? Should it simply make a small fort in the middle of nowhere? The second possibility seemed more accessible and more quiet. No annoying mortals to thwart his plan if he was far enough away from the big cities.

"Thor drops this toaster, he's obviously stronger than you."

"That's because you haven't seen it now," replied the blond man, staring at the toaster, which had been reduced to an unrecognizable piece of junk.

Loki looked at what was left of the poor toaster with raised eyebrows. There he understood the anger of the genius. A brand-new toaster that had been smashed to bits...

"Forget this gadget, we have to find a forest."

And so it was that a few days later, Thor, armed with Stormbreaker, cut trees in the middle of the forest while Loki, magic hands in action, installed enormous rocks to materialize the foundations of his future castle. In a few turns of the hand, he would then cut out the tree trunks and assemble, plank after plank, what still looked like a large hut. After weeks of hard work, especially for the blond god, Loki finally sat down in his throne room. Okay, well, more like in his room with an armchair. For the real throne, it wasn't that yet.

~And that's when my brain cracked...

Aerial shot on forest.

The Loki is an animal difficult to observe in the wild. Unfortunately, there are only few specimens and even less in captivity. When we manage to follow a Loki in his natural habitat, we must be patient and discreet to succeed in surprising him. Today, we are in one of the largest reserves in the United States where a Loki has illegally taken up residence. We will try to follow him for twenty-four hours to see what a typical day of a wild Loki looks like.

Cut. In the middle of the woods, a building can be discerned.

Here we can see a large wooden building. The Loki built it with his own hands in order to protect himself from any outside attack. However, for you, we will try to get closer and observe the Loki closely.

Cut. We see Loki entering by the main gate of the castle.

Beneath his innocent airs, although he traps few people nowadays, the Loki is an evil being. Beware of his strange powers such as duplication, feigning death, and also attacking with small knives. Probably its most fearsome.

Cut. Between the trees, one can discern Thor.

Over there, behind those trees, you can see an ally of the Loki. It is a Thor in the prime of life who puts himself at the service of the Loki out of pure affection. A mystery that science still hasn't solved to this day.

Cut. Infiltration of the camera between several planks.

Taking advantage of a breach in the walls and a drop in attention from the Thor who was taking a nap, we managed to get in.

Cut. Hidden camera effect showing a rather large room.

This is the "throne" room of the Loki. Indeed, this species has a great need for attention and recognition. Our Loki seems to take himself for a king. A most interesting megalomania to observe.

Cut. Zoom on Loki's head.

If we get a little closer we can even notice that the Loki made himself a crown...

"Stark turns off this camera !"

"Shit, spotted," yelped Tony as his face was covered by his armor.

The genie took off vertically, crossing the ceiling, and flew away into the sky. With his camera still active, Tony continued his voice-over.

"Due to risks to the survival of our special envoy, our report will focus on these aerial images of the nature reserve. Thank you for your loyalty to Stark Cam and see you soon for another episode!"

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

"He gets on my nerves. He pisses me off, he pisses me off!"

Loki was fulminating. This little mortal hiding in a metal box was ridiculously unbearable. Hoping to get over his nerves by destroying something, Loki angrily threw a fireball against a wall. He then observed, fascinated, the wall that was catching fire. Out of a simple scientific spirit, he repeated the experiment on a new board. The flames grew and licked the ceiling. Loki frowned when the heat reddened his face and left the room with a brisk step, throwing his crown into the blaze.

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

"Hum. That's unfortunate," mumbled the brown as he rubbed his chin.

Thor approached behind him yawning. He had just woken up from his nap. Not by will, just by animals running away at full speed in the opposite direction of their construction.

"The castle is on fire," he remarked.

"Absolutely," replied his brother, taking a step back to avoid a falling beam.

It exploded at his feet, sending pieces of charred wood in all directions.

"Why is the castle on fire?" said the blond man, staring at a wall that would soon collapse.

"Mmm... An accident," Loki replied with a careless shrug. "Probably a match, accidentally fallen to the ground."

"A match? A match would have burned down the whole building? "Thor asked, looking heavily at his brother.

It wasn't the first, and certainly not the last, time that Loki decided to burn everything on a whim. As far back as Thor can remember, his untimely wrath still reigned over much of the Asgard royal guard. Who watched, perfectly helpless, at the surprise barbecue of the brown.

"Yeah, that's all I see," Loki answered innocently. "You know what's good against the fire Thor? Water. Water is good. And the advantage is that there is plenty of it on this planet."

Thor nodded his head.

"So we're leaving?"

"Yes. I am fed up with this forest. And then the other one showed up again. I'm going to move to a place with water. And a little less isolated maybe. It reminds me a little too much of goats," continued Loki, pointing to a young deer jumping past them, probably cursing Loki for burning down his forest. "But the question is where?"

"At the seaside," Thor suggested, starting to walk in the woods. "You won't run out of water there."

"You know what," Loki replied, following in his footsteps, "it's not a bad idea."

"But the Avengers need me, I have to go to New York."

Loki grumbled for a moment. In the insistent gaze of his older brother, he was going to have to accompany him if he wanted to keep his support in his projects.

"All right," he capitulated in front of Thor's begging eyes. "I'm coming with you. I'll find something to do there."

And to the dismay of the superhero team, Loki found himself once again walking around in circles in the Tower.