Chapter 126

November 25th, 2015

Rory was just finishing up an interview with the CEO of a biopharmaceutical start up in the lobby of the Beekman Hotel. She enjoyed this place - it was pleasantly lit - not too bright, the textures and patterns of this place had always drawn her to it. It reminded her of a library, but minus the books.

The person sitting across from her, currently speaking mostly into her voice recorder rather than her fully attentive ears, about the major influencers of his success, was an interesting one. And that despite the topic not really being something she knew a lot about. It was just a job, and beggars couldn't be choosers. Yet what Rory mostly listened to was not the content but the enthusiasm he spoke with. She'd known someone who'd spoken with equal excitement and drive once - Logan. It felt like she'd just interviewed Logan, the younger Logan. The one that she'd grown to love.

It had been a little less than two months since Richard had passed. It was also two months from when she'd last called Logan, the last time having left her with a feeling like she was intruding on his life. She had, having called him in a moment that was less than perfect. Rory had sensed that Logan was moving on, even if she didn't quite know the details of his plans. They never talked about the others. And she knew better than to google him.

Logan had written to her a couple of times though, called too, but she hadn't been able to really reply with anything beyond a kurt 'I'm okay, just been busy' on a few of those e-mails where he'd threatened to send a search party looking for her, jokingly of course. They'd been doing this for two years - this 'leaning on each-other' thing, this 'comfort-seeking in each-other' thing, this 'Vegas' thing. But something had broken Rory when Richard had died. When she'd needed Logan the most, she'd felt him to be unavailable - for the first time since they'd gotten reacquainted. So she'd tried to push him away, almost as if that'd enable her to once again feel something other than grief. Replacing one hurt with another. It clearly wasn't working.

But as she thanked the person sitting in front of her, the interview having been a success, she just remained sitting there, pretending to take notes, suddenly realizing how badly she needed her drug of choice right then. She needed to hear that excitement in Logan's voice, she needed a pep-talk too, a long row of uninteresting pieces having brough her down on top of everything. She just needed to pick up that phone again and call him.

Self-pride be damned. At that moment she didn't care who else Logan was seeing - she knew he was. Even the fact that she was seeing someone too had lost all significance. Not even the embarrassing memory of sleeping with her married ex boyfriend was a good enough reason to stay away. In part she put this on grief, the fact that she was lost in more ways than one, still being too incomprehensible.

Logan picked up on the second ring, despite it being in the middle of his work day.

"Hey, Ace," he answered, his broad, cocky, smile vibrating through his tone, making her feel all warm inside. It was like putting a bandaid on a gushing wound.

"Hey…," she exhaled, not even knowing what else to say. She was fighting tears as she held that phone in her hand. She'd just needed to hear him.


February 12th, 2022

The assortment of persian carpets, dark velvet and leather against the stained glass windows in the dark-wood-paneled room offered a strangely comforting surrounding. There were the delicious aromas of food and drink, already making Rory's mouth water as she walked through the restaurant after the Maître D.

She'd just been to her room upstairs and was now returning to meet the others for dinner. The half an hour alone, after a very talkative car-ride over, had been a blessing, allowing her to change into her velvet wrap dress and a pair of heels in peace. Remembering that she'd had one of her less than proud moments in that same lobby several years ago, hadn't been the highlight of her day - but she knew that even that had been good in the end, as that call had been the reason she was back here this time, even if indirectly - through a lenghty detour. Through all the bad choices, less than admirable conduct, through her grief, her mid-life crisis and all that imperfectness, she could now glance down at her phone in passing and see a photo from her fiance demonstrating how he'd packed up her entire book shelf in record time. The photo of the empty book shelf made her smile.

"Have fun! I've got it," Logan added.

Rory replied with a little heart reaction, not believing how lucky she felt for having gotten this chance.

Since limos made Honor uncomfortable, ever since Mitchum's car crash due to their somewhat relaxed seat belt policy, Honor had sent a Mercedes E-class to pick Rory up. Lane and Lorelai had been already sitting in there waiting for her along with a driver named Ronald, whom they'd already included in their discussions. It was safe to say the three had offered Ronald anything from amateur marriage advice to recommendations on playlists to play in the car.

Rory had definitely noted how Lorelai too had needed this change of scenery and something other than work or Luke to talk about too. But this time she just wanted this evening to be about something lighter than that, even if it was a little selfish to want that.

There just was something different about going out in Manhattan which made her feel younger inside, and she was excitedly looking forward to the evening and the shopping tomorrow. She enjoyed this even though the slushy weather outside that had made Honor change their evening around and get them a table at the hotel's signature restaurant instead of former plans.

Rory was quite surprised to realize that the only person at their table so far was Paris, who wasn't staying at the hotel. She'd thought she'd taken longer than usual to unpack in her room. But clearly she was there in good time, and she was glad.

"Paris, hey," Rory exclaimed, cheerily. While she had seen her friends on New Years Eve, seeing just the girls for a change was a different kind of treat.

"Hi," Paris replied. She rose and proposed a hug, clearly needing one.

"How are you feeling?" Rory asked, feeling glad she'd gotten there before the others so they'd have a moment to talk.

"Okay. The nausea comes and goes," Paris replied, quietly and not too enthusiastically.

"And how…?" Rory began, being curious on how Paris was doing mentally, her comparison of this as some big failure to control her life still fresh in her mind. Paris had called her last week just minutes after she'd told Finn, and naturally the man had been at a loss for words. It was a situation that neither had expected, let alone in this stage of their lives where everybody believed to have their acts together. These were the type of mistakes teenagers made, people in their 20s, early 30s maybe... not late 30s. Mostly at least. This was a situation where one party had for decades convinced himself that he was never going to be a father, and the other was just beginning to feel that her kids were at that age where one no longer needed to look after them constantly. There had been freedom at the horizon.

"I'm so getting a night nurse and a nanny this time," Paris replied, simply, making it clear she was already thinking about this practically. The fact that she'd decided to keep the baby was not really a surprise to Rory, as she'd worked on a pro-abortion side of a debate with her once. And while Paris wasn't against it under certain conditions, her criteria were pretty unshakable, not matter how much Rory had tried to argue with her, even if that had been mostly for the sake of the sport.

"Well I think it's great, not the conditions of it… but babies are certainly cute," Rory added, smiling innocently. She'd just packed up Em's baby pictures and she was definitely very dreamy on the subject herself. She couldn't wait to recognize little traits of Logan in her baby's face just like she saw Jess every time she looked at Em, despite most people claiming the girl was a spitting image of her.

"Yeah, I guess," Paris replied with a hint of a smile.

It was then they both saw Lorelai and Lane approaching from across the hall, with Honor right behind them.

"Does Lorelai know?" Paris asked, almost assuming she did.

"No… Just Logan. Finn called him," Rory replied, quickly.

"What did he…?" Paris began to say, letting on that she hadn't really spoken to Finn since telling him, and was curious to know what he thought. But Paris realized this wasn't the moment to talk about it if she wanted to keep this news under wraps for the time being. They both knew why that was vital, Rory from personal and Paris from professional experience.

Rory could tell, Paris wanted to talk about it. She very rarely saw that look on her, and she knew her well. That lost look. So she made a note to talk to her later.

"Oh, Rory, it's so nice to see you," Honor exclaimed and demanded a warm hug from her.

"Thank you, for this… all of this," Rory said, truly appreciating Honor for throwing this together.

"Oh, this is nothing! And I will have nothing less for my future sister-in-law," Honor said, speaking loudly and joyously like she always did.

"I don't know if you've met everyone?" Rory asked.

"Well just by reputation, picture or by phone," Honor added, laughingly.

A brief round of introductions followed, and it wasn't long until the waiter came to take their drink orders.

"They have the most amazing British Vogue cocktail here," Honor recommended, already craving one, making sure the waiter knew to bring her one and keep them coming. It was pretty obvious Honor was desperate for a night out too - too much work and a couple of school-aged boys having drained hr spirit as she very prominently offered to explain.

"I'll have a gin martini," Lorelai requested a staple of hers.

Lane ordered a glass of white wine, keeping it simple. She wasn't exactly used to places like this.

"Could you make any of these delicious looking cocktails as a mocktail?" Rory asked, in part for her own sake, wanting to cut down on her alcohol consumption in hope for a baby, in part also so Paris' non-alcoholic choice would not stand out as much, wanting to support her.

"The same ones unfortunately not, but we have a delicious Salted Meyer Lemon and Sage Presse and non-alcoholic Singapore Sling if you prefer something sweeter," the waiter suggested.

"I think the latter sounds good," Rory replied, hopefully.

"I'll have the same," Paris added, feeling thankful.

"So are you getting excited yet? You have to tell us everything about the wedding!" Honor requested, and the topic provided the whole group plenty to talk about. After all, Rory was the only person at that table who had never gotten married. It was a pre-wedding shower in a way, all the important women in Rory's life, except Em, offering her words of wisdom not so much on marriage itself but the wedding and wedding planning. They'd all had very different experiences, and while not all of their marriages had stood up to the test of time, most could be considered successful or at least successful for a time. Even Paris agreed on that part.

They ate Kampachi, some preferring Rohan Duck or scallops. Rory could just read Paris how she was once again crossing off foods she wasn't supposed to eat from the menu - no soft cheeses, no to certain seafood and so on, and she honestly sympathized, realizing she hadn't thought that way in a while. This was certainly something she didn't miss about being pregnant and chose especially things she knew she'd miss once pregnant, making good use of the opportunity. She had to admit, she was actually kind of jealous of Paris if she thought about it though.

What didn't go as smoothly though, seemed to be the class difference that she'd hoped to avoid. It wasn't Honor's fault that her suggestions on what to order, how to arrange a wedding and the honeymoon never even considered the costs, while Lane clearly felt a little uncomfortable with such suggestions. Lorelai was also siding with her, suggesting several DIY solutions and explaining how many organizers were ridiculously overpaid, speaking from her own professional experience. While the cost of the dinner and the hotel stay wasn't an issue, Honor having promised to put it on the company credit card, jokingly saying they were having a brainstorming meeting with a broadened advisory board, Rory could still tell that both Lane and Lorelai were holding back, Lorelai mostly her words.

"So what kind of dress were you thinking about?" Lorelai inquired, thinking forward to the next morning. "I always imagined you in something princessy," she commented, having already glanced at the Disney line on the bridal store's website.

"I'd suggest you avoid anything with too much fabric - I did that whole fluffy princess thing, and I was melting, I swear. And my wedding wasn't even in the middle of the summer," Honor explained.

"But full length certainly," Lorelai suggested.

"Or maybe a separate reception dress?" Lane offered an idea, recalling her layered dress.

"I thought about that. I can only imagine the dress staying clean from Em's chocolate covered fingers for like two seconds," Rory laughed.

"Nannies are a must," Honor insisted. "While I didn't have the problem at the time, I've been to a dozen weddings that somehow have forgotten that tiny but crucial part. Nothing like a crying toddler to interrupt the vows," she added, shaking her head.

"Maybe something tea-length? That has always worked well on you," Paris commented, beginning to relax a little. Her dress had been a very minimalistic sheath dress.

"I'm really not sure… I guess I'm hoping to get that recognition. I waited for that feeling with the house, and I kind of think I should get that same feeling with the dress as well," Rory explained. There was also the tiny detail that she needed to take into account the possibility of having a slightly rounder bump on her waist by July. Hopefully of course. But this was going to make dress shopping inherently more difficult. She either needed to get two options, which felt like jinxing it, or something that could be altered to fit either way.

"How is the house? Can you move soon?" Lane inquired, being the most out of loop on that part.

"Hopefully as soon as tomorrow, actually. Logan has movers coming tomorrow, he's been pretty incredible in getting us there in good time. The place may still lack some furniture, but as long as we have beds and a coffee maker, I'm good to go," Rory explained, the excitement in her tone being evident.

"And when's the housewarming party?" Lorelai inquired excitedly. She'd seen the place, but only very briefly as she'd gone over to let the couch delivery guy in during Rory's work day when Logan had been stuck in a meeting.

"In a few weeks, I just want to have some time to unpack everything," Rory explained.

In those, rather casual, notes they spent the entire evening, everybody sounding genuinely happy for Rory and Logan. As they finished, everyone went their way, agreeing to meet up tomorrow morning to head to the bridal shop, which had agreed to open especially for them on a Sunday, Honor having known well which strings to pull.

As the others left, Rory stayed behind in the lobby, wanting to say a proper goodbye to Paris, feeling she needed to make sure she really was fine.

"So have you talked to Finn - after you told him, at all?" Rory asked, as Paris was putting on her coat.

"Just that one time. He has my number, he's a grown man - he should be able to pick up the phone and call me if he has anything to say," Paris explained.

"Yeah, but it can be a lot to take in, and he's not exactly experienced with things like this," Rory defended Finn, already beginning to wonder whether she should call him herself.

"What did he say to Logan? You said before that he'd called," Paris asked, her question sounding less indifferent than her initial stance. She sounded like she really wanted to hear from him which led Rory to think that maybe this wasn't just a random one night stand. Sure, it had been unexpected. But considering the two had also spent both lengthy drives from New York to Harford and back together, it couldn't be just that. If Paris didn't like someone, she would've found ways to avoid spending time with him altogether, especially the drive back. Maybe she really liked him?

"I didn't hear the way he said it, I didn't talk to him," Rory began, wishing she could help more. "But as far as I understood he was shocked, surprised… but not in a panicky way," she added, recalling how Logan had actually commented 'about time' on the fact. But then again perhaps he was just feeling a little envious too, and not really putting himself in Finn's shoes.

"Well that makes two of us," Paris sighed, crossing her arms on her chest. "I know I can do this, that isn't the problem. With him or without him - it doesn't matter. What I hate is feeling like this… early 20th century woman waiting for the man to show up and be a gentleman and pop the question," she added, ridiculing the concept.

"What happened with the two of you? I mean besides the obvious. Was it just sex or…?" Roy asked.

"I don't know… we had a good time, we got carried away," Paris explained, with a slight roll of her eyes. "The conversation flowed, he wasn't as bad as I'd imagined from your stories. He's well read, knows a lot about the world. Sure, politics didn't seem to be quite his thing, but perhaps that's a good thing. I saw him once more after New Year, you know," Paris confessed.

"You did?" Rory reflected, feeling a little excited.

"By accident, we had a cup of coffee, not a date or anything and then he went away for two weeks in Australia and here we are," Paris added, clearly fighting her emotions that something in her was hoping it'd had gone further than that.

"Well I do think you two should sit down and talk about it," Rory suggested.

"The ball is in his court. I don't need him to raise this baby, frankly it'd be easier. But I don't want him showing up during labor when he's suddenly discovered he wants to be a part of her life, or worse when the kid turns 10 or something," Paris explained.

"I'm sure he just needs some time," Rory replied.

"Maybe you're right. Men are kind of slow, aren't they?" Paris added with a shrug.