Hey...
Summary: She wonders if he knows what love is. What happens when he tries to salvage the relationship with the son that he knowingly abandoned? Does she let him back into their lives? Does he get the life he always wanted but was too scared to have?
Like always, thanks for reading. Please tell me what you think. Flashbacks are in italics.
Live Like You Were Dying
CHAPTER 7
Dance like there's nobody watching
Love like you'll never get hurt
Sing like there's nobody listening
Live like it's heaven on earth
And speak from the heart to be heard.
-William W. Purkey
The fallen leaves crunched beneath her weight as more fell down on top of her, mixing with the rain that soaked her. It fell upon her cheeks, mingling with her salty tears, and leaving water streaks across her skin.
Her body shivered violently, her arms instinctively wrapping tighter around herself. The day, in its entirety, was dreary. It took every ounce of energy she had just to leave her bed, only after being forced by Jake, had she actually done so. Now her feet carried her forward with no particular destination in mind.
Glancing upward for a second, she realized where she had gone. Her eyes darted around, taking in the sight, the memories all coming back to her at once. Her mind was spinning, the flashes of his face coming before her eyes, making her tears fall faster.
"Lucas!" The brunette girl screeched through her loud laughter. Her hair was strewn every which way, her clothes were dirtied and wrinkled, and she was panting breathlessly. But it didn't bother her; with him she knew that it didn't matter.
The blonde boy wrapped his arms tightly around her, his face nuzzled into the crook of her neck as she struggled to free herself from his grasp. They both laughed joyously. After a few failed attempts to escape, the girl surrendered and let her be gathered in his grasp.
He smiled at her, the infamous Scott smirk playing on his lips. She noticed it, the glint in his eye as he glared at her. Again her arms struggled to free themselves from his toned arms. Suddenly her feet left the ground and another shriek flew from her lips.
He spun her around, his feet carving a small circle in the golden leaves that littered the ground. "Say it." He prompted, his voice light with laugher. She shook her head, her mouth too occupied with laughing to refuse. "Say it and I'll stop."
A growl managed to escape her. She sent a death glare at him, as her arms snaked around the back of his neck. "Lucas Scott is the hottest man alive." She mumbled in defeat.
"Duh!" He smirked triumphantly. He slowed the spinning, but quickly lost his balance, sending both of them crashing to the grass, him on top. He promptly rolled from on top of her, but let his arm dangle across her waist, the other one supporting his weight as he rested on his side. "You okay?"
"Who knew you weighed so much." She frowned grumpily up at him. Her frown quickly turned to a smile, a light giggle escaping her lips. Her hand cupped in front of her mouth, silencing her laughter.
"What?" His brow furrowed curiously.
She reached up and pulled the small crimson flower from his blonde locks. He smiled at it, then took it from her grasp and placed it gently behind her ear. "Much better." She nodded in approval.
His face contorted slightly, his eyes clamping shut. A low moan escaped his lips, one that did not go unnoticed by Brooke. "You all right?" She questioned, her hand resting gently on his cheek. He simply nodded, his fist pressed harshly against his chest.
He stayed quiet a few seconds longer before finally opening his eyes. His fingers rubbed his muscles firmly before his face returned to normal. "Just a little pain." He tried to reassure her. "Probably from the fall."
She nodded warily, but decided to let it slide. "Which, by the way, was totally your fault!" She scoffed, the back of her hand swatting his chest playfully.
He simply shrugged, a smile tugging on his lips. "Come on." He offered as he pushed himself to his feet. She placed her hand in his, the other one resting against the ground to push herself up.
Her fingers scrapped something, drawing her attention to it. She grasped it in them, her eyes examining the small object. "Lucas…" Her voice trailed off. She abruptly pulled him back down, his body hitting the ground with a thud.
"What the hell was that for?" He grimaced as his fingers rubbed the sore area on his side on which he landed. His eyes fell upon the object in her hand. He frantically patted his pockets, groaning when he realized that he had dropped it.
She licked her lips hesitantly, her nimble fingers opening the small box she held. He watched timidly as she inspected its contents, his eyes shifting nervously in an attempt to read her expression. "Is this…?" Her eyes met his.
He nodded diffidently, his fingers slowly taking the box from her. He pulled the small silver band from the case and held it adroitly in his fingers. She smiled, her dimples providing him with a sudden burst of confidence that was apparent in his features.
He sat up skillfully all while pulling he up to rest between his legs. They sat facing each other, both wearing smiles that melted each other's hearts.
"I thought…" He paused. His voice was deep, a hint of huskiness seeping through from the lump that was rapidly forming in the back of his throat. "I thought, when I did this…that I would have a planned speech; with beautifully thought out words…"
He let his other hand drift up her arm to her cheek and cup it lightly. She leaned into it as his finger gently wiped away a tear that streaked down her face. "Me too." She laughed lightly through her sobs.
"…But I realize…. that I don't need all that." He smiled. His crystal blue eyes danced with mirth. "The only thing I need…" A few silent tears streaked down his cheeks and she wiped them away like he did. "The only thing I need…is you Brooke."
"Me too…" She whispered once again. They both laughed. Their faces were perfect mirrors of each other. Both had tear-stained cheeks, bright smiles, and love swirling in their eyes.
His chest rose upwardly as he took in a deep breath. He lightly grasped her hand in his, his fingers trembling. "Brooke Davis…." He licked his lips hesitantly. "…Will you marry me?"
She smiled faintly at the memory. Her eyes scanned the area, taking it in. It still looked the same. The trees they had laid under for hours had grown slightly, but they still held the same golden leaves. The river ran serenely beside her and the crimson flowers grew wildly along it.
Her eyes fell to the blue spot amongst the golden ground. She walked forward, suddenly flinging herself at the ground. "Lucas!" She shrieked as the man came into her view from behind the tall tree.
He tiredly opened his eyes; a small gasp escaped her lips. His eyes were drained, and they no longer held any life in them. The usual startling blue color had dulled to a monotonous grayish tone. "Brooke." He mumbled jadedly.
"Oh god Luke." She whispered in desperation. Her hand gently stroked his pale cheek, as her tears stung violently at her eyes. His breath was becoming shallow, and his body shook fiercely from the cold rain.
"I…I couldn't stay there." His teeth chattered together loudly. She rubbed her hands up and down his slim arms in an attempt to warm his body. She sat down beside him, immediately enveloping his body against hers. "I…I…"
"Shh…." She encouraged him. He let his head flop weakly against her shoulder, no longer able to hold it up. Her fingers gently stroked his wet hair, smoothing it down.
"I'm sorry." He mumbled quietly into her chest. His hands gripped at her shirt and pulled her closer to him. "I'm so sorry…" He muttered over and over again.
"No." She whispered into his ear. Her warm breath rolled down his neck, instantly warming him. Gradually his shaking stopped, leaving the two sitting comfortably below the tree, its branches shielding them from the rain.
"It's ok." She murmured reassuringly to him. He forcefully lifted his head so his eyes could meet hers. He shook his head gently, water splashing from his hair.
"It's not…" He sobbed quietly. He breathed gently, his entire chest moving in the simple action. His tongue traced the outside of his thin lips, as he shook his head. "This is it. I…I need you."
His hands grasped at her, pulling her towards him more. She let her eyes flutter shut, willing herself to stay strong. She had never seen him like this, so weak and frail. He had never actually been this vulnerable towards her before. "Lucas…" She opened her eyes to grab his attention. "It's ok…" He shook his head again. "I forgive you."
His breath was now coming in rapid gasps and his chest heaved continuously. "I love you." He blew out between gasps. His body shook roughly, his brutal shivers once again returning to his body.
"Come on." She stood, his arm still wrapped around her shoulder. His entire weight was pushing on her body, but she still managed to drag him forward through the rain. The rain that had once washed away their future was now returning it. A ray of sun shone down in front of her, illuminating the golden leaves.
"It's beautiful." He whispered incoherently as a gust of wind uplifted them. He stumbled awkwardly beside her, his vision blurry as he tried to grasp one.
"Lucas." Brooke sighed exhaustedly. "You gotta work with me here."
She let out a breath of relief as her car came into view. "Hales?" He smiled widely at her. His eyes sparkled clearly again. He stumbled sideward, his arms wrapping around her neck.
"Brooke." She frowned at his new state. She opened the side door and guided him down into the seat. He beamed wider at her statement.
"Brooke!" He laughed loudly. His face suddenly contorted and his body fell back weakly against the seat. "Oh. I don't feel so good." She shut the door and quickly ran to the driver's side.
"Stay with me Luke." Her voice was shaky as she noticed him starting to drift off.
-----
"Brooke!" Nathan came to a halt in front of the distraught woman. His muscled arms wrapped securely around her shaking frame and held her against his chest. "What happened? Where is he?"
"I don't know." She sobbed loudly against his shirt. "He…he left. I thought he was dead. But I found him. But he got really sick. The doctors haven't told me anything."
"He's going to be ok, right?" Haley questioned shakily. Nathan immediately wrapped her in with Brooke, hugging both girls tightly for comfort.
He nodded numbly, his eyes focused on the double doors in front of him. As if on cue, Lucas' doctor appeared, immediately approaching the three. "He's alive." He stated factually to assure them.
"I want to see him." Nathan declared adamantly. The doctor nodded, leading the three through the doors and down the winding hallways. He stopped in front of a door, blocking them from entering.
"I have to prepare you." He stated solemnly. "His heart is weak. Extremely weak. He's hooked up to a bunch of different machines to keep him alive. He's been drifting in and out of consciousness." He slowly stepped aside and allowed the three to enter.
Nathan and Haley lingered back, allowing Brooke to approach him alone. She hesitantly took his hand into hers; it was cold, a rarity for him. He usually held such warmth that would spread to her whenever they touched. "Luke." She whispered softly.
His eyes slowly fluttered open and he attempted a smile. "Thank-you." He stated, his voice barely a whisper. She nodded, her tears freshening the earlier stain. "Come here." He whispered, drawing her closer to his lips.
Forcefully he lifted his head from the bed, his lips brushing gently against hers. She leaned into him, allowing his to rest against the bed, their lips still attached. She gently cupped his cheek, pulling him closer against her mouth. He slowly pulled back, his lips curling into a wobbly smile. She flashed her dimples at him.
He willed his hand to move, pushing into the pocket of his jeans and pulling his closed fist out. He raised it to her face, which was still inches away from his. Gently he placed a small, crimson flower behind her ear. "Much better." He whispered the words that she spoke so many years ago.
She laughed gently through her sobs, allowing her smile to shine through. For a second she thought she saw the old sparkle in his eyes, but as quickly as it had come, it was gone again. She dipped her head slightly, once again capturing his lips.
The door swung open again, Peyton and Jake entering with Jenny and Ryan; Lucas and Brooke didn't seem to notice. Brooke pulled back this time, her tears falling against his chest.
She inhaled deeply, her smile faltering slightly. Her eyes fluttered shut, savoring the feeling. She opened them again, letting her forehead rest gently against his. "I love you." She whispered confidently.
He smiled widely, his eyes dancing weakly. "I love you too." His hand once again reached into his pocket, his closed fist hovering over her open hand. "I want you to have this."
The cool metal hit her hand, but he quickly closed her fist before she had a chance to see. He moved her fist to his lips, kissing it lovingly. She released her fingers, the small silver ring filling her vision. "I'm sorry Brooke—for everything."
"Shh." She placed her finger against his lips to silence him.
Ryan wiggled from Jake's arms and quickly made his way to Brooke. "Mommy?" He tugged incessantly at her shirt. She gently picked him up, placing him onto the bedside.
"Hey Ryan." Lucas whispered gently. His voice was barely there and his eyes were becoming tired.
"Daddy…" Ryan suddenly turned his attention towards Lucas. He climbed gently from his mother's arms and focused his attention on his father. "What's wrong?"
"Daddy is really sick." Brooke stroked his hair soothingly. The boy lay carefully on his father's stomach, his ear pressed against his chest. His wrapped his arms around Lucas' body, hugging him tightly.
"Please don't leave." Ryan sniffled into his chest. Everyone's hearts broke at his words, Lucas' even more so. He struggled to bring his arm around the boy's back and hold him tightly.
"I'm sorry." He whispered brokenly. "Just remember…I will always love you." Ryan nodded silently into his chest, his tears soaking Lucas' shirt.
"Jake." Lucas whispered, drawing Peyton and Jake closer to him. The both stood next to him, their eyes puffy from their tears. "I'm sorry."
"Luke, don't…" Peyton sobbed loudly.
"You take care of her…ok?" He smiled weakly at Jake.
"I will." He nodded in response. Jake gently patted his chest before stepping backward. Peyton leaned down closer, stroking his blonde hair with her fingers.
"Please don't leave."
"I'm sorry Peyt." He licked the tears from his lips. "I love you two." Peyton smiled gently, leaving a heavy kiss against his temple. She slowly backed up into Jake's arms.
"Haley." He mumbled. The brunette was instantly at her side, her arms wrapped tightly around him. He chuckled lightly into her auburn hair, the strawberry scent burning into his memory.
"I'll miss you buddy." She mumbled into his chest. She gently raised her head, their hazy eyes meeting. "I love you so much Luke. Why…why you?"
"I'm sorry Hales…" He trailed off. He gently stroked her hair in an attempt to comfort her even though he knew if would never work. "I love you too."
"Please Luke…" She pleaded desperately with him. His heart ached inside his chest harshly at her tone. "Who's gonna be there? Huh? It was supposed to be us against the world! Bunny Beugard and Rocket Roe…remember?"
He nodded faintly, a ghost of a smile gracing his features. "Yeah Hales, I remember."
"Its not fair Luke!" She yelled to no one in particular.
"I know."
"I need my buddy. Brooke needs you. Ryan needs his father." She couldn't see him any longer; her tears glazed her eyes, blurring her vision. "Nate, he needs his big bro. And what about you being Uncle Luke? Huh? It's not fair!"
His brow furrowed at her rant. "Uncle Luke. You're pregnant?"
Nathan suddenly stepped forward, his arm wrapping around Haley's shaking shoulders. "Yeah man." He nodded somberly. "We were gonna wait to tell you, but…"
"Oh Hales." Lucas whispered. His weak arms managed to wrap around her, holding her loosely. "I'm so happy for you."
"Please Lucas…." She pleaded again, knowing it wasn't his fault, but wanting him to fix it.
"I love you Haley."
"God Luke." She breathed shallowly. "I love you too." Not caring, she bent down and captured his lips with hers. She slowly broke from him and placed a gently kiss on his forehead.
He smiled weakly. "I shoulda gotten sick a long time ago…" He attempted to joke. Haley let out a small laugh and gave him another kiss.
He glanced around at everyone, smiling gently at them. He finally met eyes with his brother, who seemed to be distancing himself. "Nathan." Lucas whispered, grabbing his brother's attention and drawing him near.
Nathan leaned down to his brother, his hand wiping relentlessly at his reddened eyes. "Promise me..."
"No." Nathan abruptly leaned back, his head shaking back and forth determinedly. He crossed his arms over his chest, his jaw becoming stern. "You're not going anywhere."
"Nathan please." Lucas begged tiredly. Nathan allowed his eyes to meet his brother's and instantly broke. He allowed his tears to flow freely, not caring how he looked. He once again leaned down. "Take care of them. Of Brooke, and Ryan. And Haley. And the baby…"
"I will."
"Be good to her. Be a good man, the man I know you are." He smiled gently at his little brother. Nathan reached out and grasped his hand in his own, holding it tightly, never wanting to let it go. "And when the time comes…don't be me. I know you won't be. You'll be a good father. I'm so sorry Nate…"
"It's ok Luke." Nathan interrupted him. He wiped his face with his sleeve tiredly. "Haley's right man…this isn't fair."
"I love you little brother."
"I love you too Luke…" He smiled shakily at him. "Big brother."
Luke slowly let his eyes flutter shut, welcoming the rest. "Luke, no." Brooke was instantly at his side, grasping his hand in hers. "Stay with us Lucas."
"Brooke." He smiled, his eyes remaining shut. "I'm just sleeping. I'll still be here."
"Daddy…" Ryan was at his side again.
"I promise." He sighed. "I just need some rest." They all watched as he slowly fell into a slumber, all silently praying that he would awaken again.
