Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha

..yet……..

A screwed up Fairy Tale

By: Sam

Vegetarian, she says 'Vegetarian!' what the hell is that supposed to mean…vegetarian…I swear…if she's offending me…

"What's a ve-ga-tar-ean?" Inuyasha asked dumbly.

Kagome stared. "A vegetarian" she began, mastering her temper and replacing it with patience, "Is a person who does not eat animals."

"…Meaning you don't eat meat"

"Correct"

"Why?" was his next question.

"Because" she began "I don't support or believe in the ways they get the meat"

"You mean killing them?" he asked.

She nodded. "Only, more so"

Inuyasha sat down, a look of thought on his face.

He's so cute when he thinks.

"What do you mean by that?" he asked. Immediately the 'cute' thoughts vanished. She closed her eyes and sighed quietly.

"Margery" She yelled. Immediately, a petite woman with brown hair she was keeping in a bun appeared. "Yes Princess Kagome?"

"Can you please do me the favor of bringing me a laptop?"

Margery nodded, before running off. She came back five minutes later. A new laptop was in her hands.

Kagome sighed. "Thank you, Margie" she said. Once Margie disappeared, Kagome stood up.

"Where are you going, Kagome?" InuYasha asked. "To get my laptop" she called over her shoulder.

She came back with a blue and white laptop.

Sitting down, she opened her laptop and began to type away ' Inuyasha" she began "These creatures get tortured on a regular basis. I don't support how they are cruelly treated."

Inuyasha looked at her with a questioning glance, but Kagome was ahead of him, as she clicked on a video.

Loud moo's echoed through the room with occasional comments by InuYasha. One of those particular times, the conversation went like so:

"Dude! They just killed a pig with a brick!"

Kagome nodded, holding back tears.

"DUDE! THEY JUST CUT A CHICKEN'S BEAK OFF!"

Again, Kagome nodded.

"At least they didn't kick off his – OOOHH! WHERE IT HURTS MOST…AND WITHOUT PAINKILLERS!"

Kagome turned around to look at Inuyasha expectedly.

"I'm still eating meat" he said. She rolled her eyes. "Fine" she said, wiping her tears. "I've done my best"

She stood up and headed for the kitchen. "Are you sure you don't want what I'm eating?" she asked. He nodded and yelled back "Of course, I'm a man, and men do NOT eat tofu cakes with water." She rolled her eyes "Fine"

So Kagome returns to the living room, a hanyou waiting for her, watching TV like a zombie.

"Inuyasha, the food's ready"

Grunt.

"Inuyasha…" she said, passing her hand in front of his face"

Grunt.

She thought of something, and hurriedly went to the kitchen and fetched a glass of water…And poured it on his head.

Grunt: no movement.

Kagome growled, and suddenly ran to the kitchen again. She took a glass and broke it.

Grunt.

She sighed, reluctant to try again, and just walked to the table.

"I guess I'll just have to eat alone then" she said, and took a seat.

Inuyasha's head shot up "WHAT! God lady, you're supposed to be my wife and you were going to EAT without ME?" he yelled hysterically. "Seriously…me? Not eating? You're supposed to be the NICE one..." and he took a seat. Kagome only sweat dropped.

The butler, Jeeves what an original name... came with a long tray of food. "Prepared by lady Kagome, master Inuyasha will be having a Hamburger and the French fries." The French man said, silencing the 'H' in 'hamburger', saying 'Z' instead of 'The' and doing that weird sound with the 'R'.

Inuyasha nodded and took a bite of his burger.

"Do you like it?" Kagome asked.

Inuyasha swallowed. "Actually," he took another bite "It's pretty good."

"I'm glad you feel that way, Inuyasha" Kagome said, smiling.

Then, Jeeves came with a plate. "And for lady Kagome" he began, and unveiled the plate. "Chicken and rice"

There was a clank as Inuyasha dropped his fork. "I ough o ai u re a veteain" He said, his mouth still full.

"I am a vegetarian" Kagome said calmly, taking a mouthful of rice. She swallowed. "This is tofu."

"I nt om!" Inuyasha protested.

"I'm sorry Inuyasha" she said, cutting some chicken. "Since you said you were too 'manly' to eat tofu," she said, putting the chicken into her mouth. "I only made enough for me and Kaede."

Inuyasha swallowed. "Stupid…tofu….good….burger…"

Kagome smirked. "Inuyasha, with all due respect, shut up and eat."

Inuyasha sent a glare at Kagome which she only returned with a bigger smirk.

Kagome and Inuyasha sat on the black leather couch, a look of horror on Kagome's face.

"Oh my god!" she squealed, and put her hand in front of her face.

Inuyasha looked at her from the corner of his eyes, smirking.

Another scary scene passed by the screen, as Kagome squealed again and grabbed on to Inuyasha's arm.

Inuyasha furrowed his brow. "Oi, Kagome, are you okay?" he asked. She simply nodded, entranced by the 'Ring'.

Kagome screamed again and Inuyasha subconsciously wrapped his arm around her and pulled her close. As another scary scene went by, she cuddled into him with wide eyes.

"Don't worry" he whispered into her ear, making her shiver. "It's almost over." She nodded.

The movie finished, and Inuyasha and Kagome were slowly moving out of their position.

Just when Inuyasha was about to take his arm off Kagome, the doorbell rang. Kagome squealed and clung onto Inuyasha, and as if on reflex he wrapped his arm around her more securely. Inuyasha recognized the sound and smiled down at Kagome. "Only pizza." He said, before reluctantly standing up. Kagome shook her head, and popped in another movie. Inuyasha looked her way, as the girl looked through the movies. Her hair was loose and she was in polka dot blue shorts and a loose oversized gray sweater. 'She's pretty' he thought.

And so the newly weds sat down, eating pizza and watching scary movies.

The next evening, Kagome, Inuyasha, Sango and Miroku sat in the living room, watching 'The Ring 2'. "Before the next movie starts" Kagome said, getting up from beside Inuyasha. "I'm gonna go change into my PJ's "she said and started going towards her bedroom before she heard Miroku.

"My dear lady Sango" he said "I think more action is going to be going on with Inuyasha and Kagome than the movie. I think maybe we should get going." Kagome turned around slowly, looking scarier than Samara herself. "What…did you just say?" she asked. Sango looked anxiously between Inuyasha and Kagome, and her fiancé, who seemed to be asking for death. 'Why does he have to be so stupid?' she asked herself.

"Get that for me, will ya Inuyasha?" Kagome said with mock calmness.

"My pleasure" Inuyasha said through clenched teeth. WHACK "I suggest you calm your passions, lecher boy" Inuyasha said.

A few minutes later, Kagome emerged from the room, carrying a cup of coffee. "Hey Sango" she said, sitting next to Inuyasha. "I really think you should calm your pet pervert if you want him to live." Sango smiled. "I think he can take care of himself. And right now I think he's right, it's getting late, and we should get going."

"You know what that means Inuyasha" Miroku said.

"What the hell are you winking at?" Inuyasha asked.

Miroku looked crestfallen. "I'm not…winking..."

"Right" Kagome said sarcastically "There's just something in your eye."

Miroku nodded "At least someone understands me!"

'He's dumber than I thought' Kagome, Sango and Inuyasha thought at the same time.

"You know, I'm starting to like your idea of leaving." Kagome said.

"Wow" said Miroku. "Can't you show a man some love?"

"That's Sango's job not ours"Inuyasha said "And I agree with Kagome, get out"

Sango decided to help her future husband out. "C'mon Miroku" she said. "These 2 seem to be eager to get it on" she whispered at a very audible level, and ran out with Miroku.

At the same time, 2 pillows hit the closed door. "Missed me, missed me" Miroku taunted. 2 more pillows flew his way. "Ha-ha I'm too fast" 2 more pillows "Missed me, missed- "WHACK, WHACK, WHACK(BOOM CRASH WHACK OUCH)Miroku let out a large 'Ouch' before falling to the ground unconscious, courtesy of Inuyasha, Kagome and Sango. Inuyasha had finally given up the 'let me catch him with a pillow' method and decided he would try the 'get up and kick his sorry ass' method, and proved the second one much more efficient. Kagome had decided to stop taking it easy on Miroku and threw a…variety of large...hard objects at Miroku's head. Finally, Sango decided since Miroku was already unconscious, he wouldn't notice, and she would let out her rage on him.

Sango smiled and dragged Miroku out of the room, looking sheepish.

Kagome rolled her eyes. "She's becoming as bad as him"

"Yeah, I know" agreed Inuyasha.

"Hey, Inuyasha"

"Yea"

"Don't you have to put on your pajamas too?"

"Actually, yea" Inuyasha said, mesmerized by the movie.

"Well, I know I'm gonna get the right side of the bed now."

"Why?"

"Because I'm gonna BEAT YOU THERE!" she said, jumping over the couch and scrambling towards the stairs.

It only took the hanyou about 2 minutes to figure out what the princess was planning.

"Wench, get your ass back here!"

"NEVER!" the girl called back.

Inuyasha growled and sprinted into a run.

Inuyasha was obviously the faster of the two, but now that Kagome had a (very big) head start, she was winning. As she started to climb the stairs, the hanyou jumped up and was only a few feet from the floor. However, Kagome got there 2 seconds faster and slammed the door in the hanyou's face.

"Oi, wench, lemme in!" he screamed, banging at the door.

"Inuyasha, patience is a virtue"

"What the hell is a virtue and who gives a crap?" he yelled impatiently, banging at the door.

Kagome sighed and opened the door, after a good half an hour, stepping back as Inuyasha fell forward.

"I was taking a shower." She said calmly as she dried her hair with a towel.

"Yeah yea" Inuyasha grumbled, spitting out some carpet.

Kagome held out her hand for Inuyasha but he just scowled and ignored it, getting up.

Kagome rolled her eyes. "Whatever, I'm gonna go get some milk." She said, walking over him.

"Stupid girl" Inuyasha growled, once she was out of earshot. A mischievous smirk then played on his face "I'll teach her to lock me out of my own room." He said, walking in the room and locking the door behind him.

About 30 minutes later, Kagome was outside of her room, locked out.

She knocked twice. "Inuyasha..." she said impatiently, her hands on her hips. She knocked again. "You made your point" she said, tapping her foot on the cold floor. She received no answer and rolled her eyes. "Fine, Inuyasha I'll see in the morning" she said, turning on her heel and walking out towards the living room.

Inuyasha chuckled inside his room. "She'll be back" he said smirking.

Inuyasha furrowed his brow in concern. 'Why isn't she knocking again' he thought. He glanced at his clock. '4 A.M.?' he thought. He brought his covers over him as a cold wind suddenly came in through his open window. 'What is she crazy? It must be FREEZING outside!' Inuyasha growled in frustration and sighed in defeat. He took the warm covers from his cold body and walked towards the door. "Stupid girl" he grumbled, "Making me get up." Inuyasha walked into the hallway and hurriedly walked down the flight of stairs. "Kagome…" he called softly. He walked into the first living room and growled, seeing Kagome on the couch, shivering with only a couple thin sheets as protection from the cold. He sighed and took her bridal style, before jumping onto the flight of stairs and taking her to the room. Setting her gently on the bed, Inuyasha covered her with sheets and walked towards the door. "Good Night Kagome." He whispered before closing the door.

Statistics:

Pages: 7

Words: 2,023

Characters, no spaces: 9623

Characters, with spaces: 11563

Paragraphs: 113

Lines: 305

beams at statistics this probably isn't much compared to others but for me it's a record! smiles now, aren't u proud of me! hands ferrero rochers to reviewers for no reason. ok people, now u can not angry review me and be happy! Expect an update soon (spring break is coming and I want to get at least 2 chapters done before its over) REVIEW!