Chapter 172
May 2nd, 2022
"Thanks for meeting me," Jess said, as he watched Rory slip behind the table at a coffee shop they used to frequent when he still lived in Hartford - when they were still together. He had a cup of coffee in front of him and had gotten Rory a water, expecting her to be thirsty. He just didn't want to waste time, both having other places to be, on ordering.
Jess had asked last night when he'd dropped Em off at their house, for the first time actually stepping foot inside the place briefly, for Rory to meet with him, saying he had something to talk to her about. Rory had been preoccupied with her own things and hadn't really dwelled on it much and the day had been busy enough for her to not really have time to think about what it was. At the most she expected something along the lines of talking about Em's schedule or their summer plans, as she knew from before that Jess wanted to take Em to California to see Jimmy and Sasha sometime over the summer and the general plan had been he'd do that while Rory was on her honeymoon but the details needed some ironing out. Jess' relationship with his dad was far from perfect - patchy at best, but a couple of times they had seen Em, and Sasha had been great with as expected. So Jess wasn't directly against having them interact as long as he was around himself.
"Sure, no problem," Rory replied, adjusting the waistband of her skirt a little, having worn a regular skirt not something from the maternity section that day, hoping it'd do. But it was quickly becoming clear that she just needed to pack up everything, perhaps for good if she thought about the odds of fitting into them again.
"So how are you feeling?" Jess inquired, catching Rory a little by surprise. It was nice to ask, but it was sort of borderline too, waking that worry in Rory she'd also felt that time when he'd held her hand when she'd felt nauseous.
Rory swallowed several gulps of water, having needed it.
"Alright. Feeling pretty good… this is the good bit, I guess," Rory said, honestly. She had more energy, there was no more nausea - just a small step until her back would ache and she'd feel all heavy.
"So L.A. is all set, I bought the tickets. I have a nice room booked for us right by the beach," Jess began, leaving Rory a little baffled that he'd wanted to meet her in person just for this. "It's got a pool and everything," he added.
"You got to make sure she wears sunblock," Rory said in a serious tone.
Jess rolled his eyes at her, but got that she was joking. Of course he knew that by now.
"That it?" Rory asked, with a slight frown.
"Um… no," Jess began and now Rory could tell he was stalling. Jess was rarely nervous.
"Out with it, come on," Rory encouraged, momentarily slipping into a similar banter like they'd had years ago. Now that she was more set with Logan and Jess seemed to accept it, having now gotten used to seeing them together as well, it was easier to be friends.
"I might be moving," Jess confessed.
"Oh, wow," Rory exhaled, really having not expected that. "Where?" she managed to ask. This was all about Em and about their logistics.
"Providence," Jess replied. "Lisa's mom passed away recently and since she got a job there anyways, she's thinking about moving into their house there. And… well she invited me along, " he explained, and exhaled, leaving a lot for Rory to read between the lines.
"I'm sorry to hear that - about her mom, I mean," Rory said politely, needing some time to digest this. Rory knew from Chilton Days from some essay Lisa had written how her dad had passed already when she'd been young.
Rory hadn't really spoken to Lisa in great detail about whether she wanted kids of her own someday, but Rory could assume that if she did she wasn't eager to wait too long. And a move to her childhood home, as she understood, could mean just that - that she wanted to settle down. But she couldn't really blame Jess for wanting that too - being alone sucked, and she knew it. She understood Jess wanting a family too.
"What about the store?" Rory asked, thinking practically.
"I'd keep it for now, drive over a few times a week when I can't get someone else to cover for me," Jess explained. "But eventually, if everything works out… I guess I'd try to find a property closer," he added, but didn't really explain that Providence didn't exactly have a broad selection of places he was keen of so far.
"It's quite a drive, what an hour and a half, two?" Rory discussed.
"Something like that, but totally get that this is what the price is… and for Em's sake I don't even have to start bringing her there straight away. I could just come work for a few days at the store and have her there for the weekend before driving over there for the rest of the week or something. You know, ease her into it…," Jess suggested, still sounding like he was a little hesitant.
The silence lingered for a bit.
"Real estate is a lot pricier over there…," Rory said, thoughtfully, knowing that Jess selling the Apparatus Bay came with a significant downside. She knew this aspect was never really something Jess took easily - he didn't have the kind of money Rory did and she also knew he struggled talking about it.
"I know," Jess sighed.
"You know you can..," Rory began to say but reacted seeing Jess tense up, not wanting to talk about it. She was willing to help him, just like she had helped him build the place from ground up as well.
"But Em's a priority here. I don't want to make her worry she's losing me or...That just because I will be further away that I won't be around," Jess said instead, worriedly.
"She won't and you're a wonderful father for saying that," Rory assured.
"She's had a hell of a year of changes already," Jess noted.
"I know," Rory admitted.
"I just… I don't want to force this one more thing on her," Jess replied.
Rory felt a little offended at that but she knew he was right. She'd needed Logan, she'd needed this life that she was living bad enough to put herself first. And while it came with some guilt, she knew it had been the right thing to do even if the main assurance she kept telling herself was that Em deserved to see a mother that was happy. She was working on it, she really was.
"She'll be okay," Rory said, not wanting to let Jess know that his words had hit close to home. Hell, he probably knew it.
"How's she taking the new family member, do you think?" Jess said, gesturing at her bump.
"She's been… I don't know. Not too enthusiastic I guess, but we've all tried to tell her about the positives. Gigi, Logan, his sister, mom… I even had this dream where she told me she worried about me, whether I'd get hurt…," Rory recalled. "I know she probably doesn't think that, it's just in my head - the possibility of it," she added, shaking her head and gesturing with her hand that it was nothing.
"You know she could well be, you know…," Jess suggested.
Rory eyes at him dubiously, asking to elaborate wordlessly.
"She sometimes asks me to tell her about the time when she was born and of course I never go into the gory details, but I do tell her how I got to hold her against my chest and talk to her. How while the doctors helped you, I assured her I'd always look after her and how we both love her no matter what," Jess said, recalling those prescious, anxious, hours. "So she knows it was dangerous…," Jess added, snapping out of his memories.
"I know she knows…Well… I don't know how well she know, but I guess it's something we need to go over at some point," Rory sighed, feeling tired of her day. She didn't want to think about it too much, truth be told. It was hard.
"What did the doctor say? Any major risks?" Jess asked with genuine concern in his tone.
Rory shook her head.
"Good," Jess replied, but they both knew that they'd gotten the all clear last time too.
For a moment they just sat there, Jess nursing his cup of coffee.
"Have you ever thought about what would…," Jess began, stopping what he was beginning to say. "I don't mean to…," he added. "Just… with Logan in the picture and Lorelai also as an interested party, as well as Em's brother or sister…," he continued, hoping Rory would catch his train of thought.
"Yes, Jess - I have. And it's not really something I like to think about obviously," she replied, needing to look up just for a moment to not let her emotions get the best of her.
"Hey, I'm sorry I brought it up, okay?" Jess regretted having said anything at all.
"But of course yes - she's yours, did you really doubt that I'd somehow try to keep her from you?" Rory said.
"As I said - I'm sorry. It's just not a situation I am familiar with. Already the idea of Em having Logan as a second dad of sorts around most of the time instead of me… it's not something I enjoy thinking about," Jess explained.
"And I guess now I'll know how you feel, won't I?" Rory replied, and stole a little sip from his coffee cup.
