Chapter 10

Concerning item #5: The Key Around His Neck 4 (continued)

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"Please," Cat begged another Brooklynite boy. "I've come all this way. I have to see him…"

"What ya gonna do about her, Spot?" Woodsy insisted on knowing.

Spot thought quickly, his mind racing.

So he left the decision to her.

He discreetly stepped out, and followed a heard of newsie boys past her like it was natural. He blended in perfectly, not meeting her eye. If she found his face in this crowd, he decided, then she deserved to find him.

She must've recognized him immediately, because she gasped and clutched her heart. She didn't speak, just stood there with her mouth open.

Spot sighed to himself. So much for that. He put on his best poker face, trying to not look intimidated or emotional in any way, and turned around.

"Heya, Cat," he said good-naturally. "How's it rollin'?"

But she still wouldn't speak. Neither did any of the boys around her, who had finally stopped laughing.

"Life treatin' ya good?" Spot went on. He put his hands in his pockets, and just looked at Cat, scanning her for her response to him. Still shocked, but now maybe even a little… relieved?

"Oh, my dear goodness. Spot," she said at last, embracing him. He stood straight, just taking it and waiting impatiently for her to be quite done.

"Nice to see you too," Spot said, then pulled her away from him. Spot then noticed his boys, gaping at the sight.

"Hey, hey! Don't you have woik to do?" Spot yelled. They got busy with various jobs very quickly.

"Walk with me," Spot commanded, heading for his favorite dock, and leaving the others behind.

Spot had so many things to say to her it seemed, but he couldn't decide where to start. They walked in silence all the way to the end of the dock, and Spot sat, expecting her to do the same. She did.

"I'm sorry," Was the first thing that came to his mouth.

"You don't have anything to be sorry about," she said quietly.

Silence again. Spot had to decide on another topic, but there were so many…

She beat him to it.

"I never heard from you," she said that accusingly, like he had done that on purpose, like he wanted to avoid her all these years.

"I couldn't find ya," he replied.

"I left you a lead."

"Two letters for an entire state? It took time."

"Four years?"

Spot grew angry.

"God, woman, what do ya want me to say? I tried! Jack had all his boys combin' half the city, and I had all a' mine coverin' the other half. Don't tell me I wasn't lookin'. Sorry if it wasn't fast enough to suit you, princess."

She lowered her gaze.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I just… I…"

"You treated bad theah?"

"Well, no."

"You wanted to get away?"

"No. I just… I missed you."

She bit her bottom lip and her cheeks went red. Spot smirked. Something that never went away in her, he supposed.

"So tell me about yerself," Spot insisted. "What have ya been doin' while I wasn't around?" Spot tugged at the ribbon on her hat. "I see they give ya nice things to put on yerself."

"Miss Gray's really rich," she explained. "She takes the prettiest girls off the streets and teaches them song and dance and music and arts… Then when we're old enough she finds us a rich man to marry and sees to it that we're taken care of. No one knows why she does it, but she seems to enjoy it."

"What year do the goils usually get married?"

"Around sixteen or seventeen. Miss Gray says I'm due for one but I can't find one I like."

Spot nodded.

"So you're gonna up and marry a guy, huh?"

She looked to the floor.

"I've thought about it."

"Jack's taken to ya, ya know."

She grinned in embarrassment.

"I know."

"Ya like him?"

She looked to the floor again.

"Yes, I suppose I do."

Spot nodded understandingly, and fingered his cane.

"Well, it ain't my life," Spot said with a strong hinting tone. Cat frowned.

"What do you mean by that?"

"You're the one with the education, princess, you figure it out."

"Please stop calling me that."

"I can do what I like… Princess."

"You haven't changed," she said with disappointment. "You're still mean. Meaner, if possible."

"Ya expected me to change?"

"I guess you can't out here."

"Yeah, not all a' us live in a castle."

She looked to the ground.

"So," she went on. "You've been keeping busy, I presume?"

"Eh, I haven't done much, just been stayin' in Brooklyn, makin' some friends… and enemies…"

"From what the papers say, it sounds like you are really important out here."

"Does it now?" Spot said in surprise. Never expected the papers to catch up with him like that. It pleased him that he had made such a racket in this town that they would pay attention.

"Yeah, guess I am, then," Spot said. He looked at her long and hard. Flashes came, ones of her face as it was, as he remembered. Her as a little girl. She was beautiful back then too, he knew that then, and he knew it now.

"Ya look good," Spot said abruptly. She looked at him with surprise. It was the first nice thing she had ever heard him say.

"Thank you," she replied. "You look the same."

Spot smirked. She tried to recover.

"I… I mean as handsome as I remember."

Spot wanted to say something like "of course" or "I know it", but he couldn't bring himself to. Something about a compliment, when it came from her…

Spot could have kicked himself. He was just liking her pretty face was all this was. She was familiar territory, a face marking a time when life was simple and secure.

She let him stare, which he didn't realize for a moment that he was doing. He turned back to the view of the river.

"Why do ya lie to' me?" he said. She was taken aback.

"You are handsome, you always have been--"

"That's not what I meant."

He couldn't help facing her again. He liked to look at a person's eyes when he engaged in conversation. Eyes were a window into a mind, a soul. Spot felt he could read any person, even a stranger, if he could just see their eyes.

"I mean, why do ya tell me you're so happy, when I can see plainly that ya ain't?"

She seemed offended immediately, but didn't answer.

"I should probably get home," she said in a huff. Spot sighed.

"Come on, I'll take ya."

"No," she said coldly. "Not you."

She got up and began to storm off. Spot could only follow.

"Whatsa mattah?" Spot said, close at her heels. "We're just talkin' honest heah. Would ya rathah me lie to ya? Ya should have told me that foist when ya came marchin' up on my turf unannounced. Give me some sort a' clue, at the very least."

"Ugh!" she said, stomping away even faster. "Get away from me."

"What'd I say?" he said, keeping up with her easily. "Were ya expectin' some other Spot Conlon?"

"In a word, yes," she replied through her teeth.

"People change out heah."

She stopped.

"Do you like what you have become? Do you look in your reflection and smile?"

Spot paused.

"Well, yeah, actually."

She started walking off again.

"We've grown apart, Spot."

"We nevah were togethah in the foist place! That was all in your imagination, princess."

She gasped in her surprise, clasping her heart.

"How dare you!"

"Go ahead, deny it. Lie to me some moah."

She whirled around, embarrassed tears now in her eyes.

"What, ya gonna cry now, princess?"

He had her cornered and they both knew it. And when you corner a cat they'll lash out anyway they can…

"Fine, I'll admit it," she said harshly. "I was in love with a dream, of what I wanted you to be… a dream of a person kind at heart, who would risk his own life to save mine. A man in that in some course of his life, would find it in him to break through the tough outer shell, and allow himself to display any small fragment of affection for the sake of another… preferably me. But I see now that I was blind in my youth. I'm glad I saw you, Spot. Now I can put my childhood foolishnesses aside, for that's all you were."

Spot let her walk off alone. No one had ever dared spoken to him like that in a long, long time. Especially a woman. It hurt, surprisingly, because he knew it was all true. He never truly believed any woman could love a man like him anyway, so he didn't feel so bad when he played 'catch and release' with them. She just made him fully realize that he was a horrible person. He lived on other people's fear for his own survival. Had he turned into Haze and not noticed? Perish the thought…

He watched her climb into a carriage, this time willingly. He couldn't let her leave him again… He couldn't.

"Cat!" he said, running over and jumping into the carriage with her.

"Spot? What are you--?"

"Shhh," Spot said, putting a finger to his own lips. "Listen, ya can't go wanderin' 'round New York by your lonesome, and ya know it. That tells me that youse were willing to risk everything just to see little ol' me again. So I ain't gonna let all that be in vain and let ya go away all mad and whatnot. Wilson, go ahead."

The man nodded and shook the reins.

"Listen," Spot said to Cat. "I'm sorry I'm such a stinkin' dumbass. K?"

"Are you going to change?"

"Now, that's askin' a lot…"

She crossed her arms and put her gaze out the window.

"Fine, fine," Spot said, making her face him again. "I'll try. A'right?"

She fought a grin without success.

"Alright. Then I'll see you again."

Spot didn't reply for a moment, considering Jack. They didn't seem too serious yet, so he agreed.

"Sure. When?"

"Tomorrow. After classes."

When they reached their destination, Spot jumped out first, and held out his hand for her, much to her surprise. She put her hand on his and thanked him.

"Thanks, Wilson," Spot said, waving the driver off. "Say hi to your wife and kids for me. Give Allison an especially big hug."

"Will do, Spot," the driver said with the tip of his hat.

"You know him?" Cat asked.

"I know everyone from Brooklyn," Spot explained. "Ya gotta love Brooklyn for it to love ya back."

They went to the bottom of the stairs to her building. As soon as her foot hit the first stair, Spot grabbed her sleeve.

"Hey, Cat," he said. "I really meant it. About ya lookin' nice and all. Good colah for youse or somethin'."

She blushed, something Spot missed the most about her.

"Thank you," she said. "I meant it too. About you."

Spot nodded his thanks back.

"Good night," she said, as the first of the sunset hit her face. "I'll see you tomorrow."

Then she left behind that awful door that always seemed to take her away from him.

"Tomorrah," Spot repeated. "I'll be there, princess."

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