Chained Melody
Schuldig stared at Brad. "Look, we've done this the easy way, and the hard way, and the fucking painful way. I'm running out of ways here, and you're running out of time. We haven't even given you a drink in two days. Why the fuck are you still holding out on us?"
"You won't kill me," Brad rasped.
"I might let you die," Schuldig said coldly.
"You're like some cartoon villain," Brad shook his head, his tongue feeling like a lead weight in his mouth. "You threaten and threaten, but you can't carry out the threats because then you'll never get what you want."
"You screwed this up for yourself," Schuldig pointed out. "If you'd let me in we'd could be allies by now. Hell, we could even be lovers. God knows where you're hiding this shit about the summoning in your head, but I've learnt a hell of a lot of other stuff about you. I've learnt how you couldn't sleep for lust when we were in London. I've learnt how jealous you've been getting while Jei and I are together. I've learnt that in the past, in the distant past, you had a vision of us. Us."
"No," Brad murmured, not sure why he was denying one of his most vivid memories.
"Several times, Brad. Disjointed, confused, some of it far future, some of it already happened, some dreams, some visions, but all us. So I don't think I'm going to let you die, and I don't think you're going to kill me. Somehow, this is all going to work out."
Brad stared at him. "Sometimes I wonder how a person can go through what you've been through and still believe that. It won't work out. It never does."
Schuldig shrugged nonchalantly. "I'll make it work out, for me, at least. You know I can do that, at least. My life will work out in a way that best suits me. The rest of you can go fuck yourselves, for all I care."
"Even me?" Jei asked.
"Yeah, probably," Schuldig shrugged again.
"You're a selfish git," Brad spat. "Your life revolves around yourself. You've never cared for anyone else, have you?"
In three short steps Schuldig strode across the dungeon and slapped Brad across the face. Blood arced from his mouth and trickled down his chin. He stood over the American, quivering with rage.
"You have never cared for anyone else," Schuldig said, voice low and angry. "I did. I loved you. I loved you with every particle in my body. And you used that and took advantage of it and never once thought about it. It never even occurred to you to wonder how that affect me. You took me for granted. You. Utter. Bastard." Schuldig turned and walked back across the room. He grabbed Jei's chin and jerked it around, almost breaking his neck, and kissed him roughly. Jei gave a squeak of surprise, and tried to pull away. Schuldig pushed him away roughly and his head snapped back to Brad. "Don't tell me I never cared for anyone other than myself, Crawford," he snarled. "Not when you were the one who taught me that it was the only way to survive in this world."
* * *
"Schuldig, I-" Nagi stared around the stone room. "Where is Schuldig-sama?" he asked in halting English. He knew the man who sat opposite him. Most people did, no matter how low a profile he kept. But Nagi still remembered the American who had brought him to this accursed place.
"I don't know," Brad sighed. "He stormed out a while ago. The Irish bastard followed him, God knows why." He let his head fall back against the wall.
"Are you… you are Crawford san?" Nagi asked, stepping further into the room. "You have the items Schuldig wished for me to scan onto my computer?"
"Had, boy, had," Brad corrected dully. "I thought you refused? You are Nagi Naoe, aren't you?"
"Yes," Nagi murmured. He left the room, and Brad resigned himself to more abandonment, but a few minutes later Nagi reappeared with a glass of water. Brad was still chained to the wall, but Nagi held the glass for him and he drank greedily.
Nagi backed away while Brad was still drinking, and he almost choked until he remembered that the boy was a telekinetic. Nagi sat where Jei had been sitting earlier, and watched Brad with just as much intensity. Brad found it deeply unnerving. A child, small and delicate, huge eyes and tousled hair, knees drawn up under chin and arm wrapped tightly around them, elbows sticking out all over the place. The sort of child Brad had imagined himself fathering, intelligent and curious, intent. But Nagi… Nagi was cold and distant, impersonal and pragmatic in all things. He was a child, young enough to be considered cute, even, but the bitter intelligence that burned behind the blue eyes spoke of lifetimes of experience in a cold world. Schuldig was a product of the minds around him, but Nagi was a product of the actions.
He watched Brad with an intensity and determination, and patience, that no child possessed. Brad held his gaze.
"Is there a world record for not blinking?" A nasal voice interrupted them. Both heads snapped round to see Schuldig leaning in the doorway, unlit cigarette hanging limply from his mouth. "I've been here ten minutes, and by the looks of it this has been going on a hell of a lot longer than that."
Nagi scowled at him. "Is this what's going on? What I can find out about without being dragged into?" he demanded, gesturing at Brad. "Honestly, I though you knew you could trust me a little further than that. I have some brains."
"You have many," Schuldig said smoothly, "and I want to take advantage of them. Brad isn't the problem, you see. It's what we want to scan and filter. Of course, now you've come down here it'll be on camera, and Hertz will assume you're involved and know everything. So basically, you're screwed, even though you now hardly more than you did before."
"Oh give me some credit," Nagi frowned. "The cameras are all on a digital system. Installed by a complete idiot; if they were analogue I'd have to replace the tapes but since it's digital all I have to do is hack in to the system and stick the relevant film on a loop."
Schuldig stared at him. "You utter genius," he said, a smirk curving slowly across his face. "Oh, you're going to be so useful to me." He dug in his pocket for a lighter.
"I'm going to be so used by you," Nagi said bitterly.
"You don't have to be," Brad said quickly. "He needs you, not the other way around."
Nagi gave him a cold look. "Rosenkreuz doesn't need me," he pointed out. "I need someone like Schuldig to keep me from becoming too expendable."
"Everyone's expendable," Brad told him. "Even Schuldig. If they think you're loyal, you'll survive. If you're disloyal, they'll kill you, no matter how vital you are to them."
"Like cutting out a cancerous lung," Nagi said with grim humour. "You need it, but you're willing to give it up to stop the cancer spreading, no matter how much harder it's going to make your life."
"Of course, you'd rather not get cancer in the first place," Schuldig said, taking a drag on the cigarette.
Nagi and Brad exchanged looks. They didn't laugh, but they didn't have to. Brad's mouth twitched.
"I want your patronage," Nagi said, "in return for my help. What do you want?"
"You help," Schuldig said simply.
* What's 'patronage'? * Brad heard in his mind. It made him jump; the last time Schuldig had done they had been… * We were having sex, * Schuldig finished for him. * Regrets? *
"No, no regrets," Brad lied. "And patronage derives from the Roman idea of clients and patrons. Patrons would be richer citizens, usually a member of the class above the clients. Clients would go to their patron each morning and do whatever small tasks their patron demanded, and in return they would receive food, money and, if they were an artist or writer, exposure."
"I asked for a definition, not a history," Schuldig said wryly. "It's a 'you scratch my back, I scratch yours' arrangement, huh?"
"Should I get into trouble, I want you to use your influence to keep me from serious harm," Nagi said coolly. "In return, I'll scan whatever it is you want scanned in, and offer the kind of help a telekinetic can provide."
"That seems fair enough," Schuldig conceded.
"I want the same agreement with Crawford-san," Nagi added. "He also enjoys considerable privilege."
"Neither of us is popular with Hertz," Crawford pointed out. "We have very little sway with him."
"He's old," Nagi said confidently.
"Um, hey!" Schuldig waved a hand in front of Nagi's face incredulously. "He's in chains! Why on earth would you want his patronage? What can he do for you?"
"You won't keep him there forever. You can't. I don't know what's going on, but he's suddenly become a lot more important. So when he is freed, and you've got what you want, he'll be just as useful." Nagi smiled and stood up. "I plan, Schuldig-sama."
"So do I," the older man objected. "This is a plan, isn't it?"
"More of a plot," Crawford put in.
"Oh shut up," Schuldig snapped. "When you're chained up on the floor you don't get to have an opinion."
"Good rule," Nagi said approvingly. "Right up until the point you're chained up on the floor."
There was a rustle and a clank and a handful of clangs.
Brad couldn't resist. He turned his head and stuck out his tongue at the man now sitting next to him. Schuldig glowered at him, but Brad knew he was amused too. A little of that old camaraderie was still there, probably reignited by Schuldig's uninvited interruption in Brad's mind. Well, he'd been doing that for days now, but Schuldig hadn't been intrusive when he spoke to Brad, no more than normal.
"I just wanted to let you know," Nagi said solemnly, "I have power too, and you shouldn't underestimate me." And he walked away.
"Uh, Nagi?" Schuldig called.
"Nagi?" Brad joined in.
"Nagi!"
"Naoe!"
"Oi!"
Jei stepped through the door. "Hello," he grinned.
"Jei!" Schuldig grinned. "Nagi chained me up. Little help?"
"He left his laptop," Jei smiled. "That's good. He must trust you a lot. He's probably missing it though. If he's helping us now, it would be good to keep him happy."
"Yes, he trusts us now," Schuldig nodded. "He left it here; he's probably going to come back and reclaim it. Soon."
"He knows we won't be going anywhere for a while," Brad snapped as Jei picked up the laptop and wandered off to return it. "And look, now he's got no reason to come back at all!"
"Ah, scheisse."
* * *
Nagi stood in the centre of the corridor, feeling flattered, a smug little smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. Being wanted by two men stoked his vanity, and he found it especially pleasing that neither wanted him sexually. He was wanted for himself, a wholly new experience.
Rammi grabbed his elbow and yanked him into a third year dorm room, closing and locking the door behind them. Nagi had caught a glimpse of Jei, gold eyes gleaming, rushing towards the door, clutching his laptop. Nagi prayed that Jei had the sense to keep the laptop away from the door if he chose to ram it.
Rammi pressed an ear to the door. "I think he's gone," he murmured. "I can't believe they let that psycho wander around like that."
"He's not so bad," Nagi objected. "At least he doesn't try to use people, or take advantage of them to further his own means."
"Or steal their powers?" Rammi raised an eyebrow. "I asked, Nagi. I wasn't going to steal. I worked at earning your trust, at being your friend, and you let your paranoia get the better of you."
Nagi stared at his feet. "You were kind to me," he admitted. "And you said, from the beginning, that you wanted my help, wanted my power."
"My intentions were mercenary," Rammi admitted, "but I like you. There are a lot of telekinetics, a lot of powerful telekinetics, but I chose you because I liked you. You were lost, and alone, and no one spoke your language and no one understood your culture. I know precisely how that feels. I resented being brought here so much. I was older than you, I spoke English, if not German, and I even had family here. And yet I still felt so alienated."
"We're all alienated," a voice said from outside the door. "That's why we're here. We're different. We're freaks. And we all know it. We treat each other as freaks, find factions and excuses to excuse our prejudice against ourselves. So much self-loathing."
"And you're the freakiest one here," Rammi growled. "What do you want, you nutcase?"
"Nagi left his laptop behind. I'm returning it. I'm his friend, I have his trust."
Rammi turned to stare at Nagi. "You're not… You can't be friends with that 'thing'. How?"
"And you wonder why I don't like you," Nagi said sardonically. "Look, we have a lot in common. I can't deny that. This place is hard, it is painful. I've suffered here, I suffered before I came here. But I can't trust you. I can't trust your intentions. Do you know why? Because you can't trust my intentions. If I befriended a younger student, which I know is impossible right now, it wouldn't be out of good nature. It would be to gain an advantage. I'd be nice, and I'd help them, and I'd look out for them, even try and keep them out of trouble. But I'd always put me first, and if push came to shove I'd let him go and I'd let him die. And you'd do the same to me."
Rammi stared at him. "You were born for this place," he said, a hint of admiration in his tone.
"I'm too young," Nagi sighed. "I can't protect myself, not yet."
Jei laughed. "Schuldig's still all chained up."
Nagi stared at the door. "Good point."
"You can't earn a living, you can't rent a flat or own a credit card or anything like that," Jei conceded. "In the real world you'd be helpless, but here, you can look after yourself."
"As I said, you were born for this place. Crawford thinks he's a natural, but he's not a patch on you," Rammi added.
"I have to get back to the dorms before curfew," Nagi said abruptly. "I want to stay out of trouble. Let me out, Rammi." Rammi obediently unlocked the door. "Can I have my laptop back?" Nagi asked Jei, who handed it over without a word.
The teens watched the eleven-year-old boy walk away down the corridor.
"So small," Rammi murmured. "The perfect vessel for so much power. You'd never guess."
"You're going to die," Jei said simply, and walked away.
That night, Nagi thought about Rammi's words, and his own words, and cried himself to sleep.
