Ch. 10
Disclaimer: "Homophobia: The irrational fear that three fags will break into your house in the dead of night and redecorate it against your will."
Gan Ning had come to a conclusion: he had lost his mind. That was the only explanation for all this. It was why he had done (and enjoyed) what he'd done last night, and it was why, when he awakened with Zhang He gazing up at him with a drowsy smile on his face, his first response was not to panic, become angry, struggle, or any other appropriate reaction, but to return the smile. He. Had. Lost. His. Mind. To his horror, he rapidly confirmed this observation less than thirty seconds later, when he discovered that his mouth had completely ceased to obey his brain.
"Good morning, handsome." Zhang He said, resting his head on one of Gan Ning's shoulders while lightly fingering the tattoos on the other.
GET OFF OF ME! Roared his brain.
"G'morning." Mumbled his mouth.
"Did you sleep well?" Zhang He asked, grinning mischievously.
GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! Screamed his brain.
"Mm-hmm." Said his mouth, flashing a similar grin.
Zhang He reached up and played with a lock of tousled auburn hair. "Are you hungry?" He questioned, curling the hair around his finger.
JUST LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE, YOU EVIL, EVIL, GIRLY-MAN! Shrieked his brain.
"Starved." Said his mouth.
"Good. Ling Yi brought up some breakfast for us. I hope you like dumplings."
Please, please, just shut up. Shut up, and don't say anything at all. His brain begged his mouth.
"Are they meat dumplings? I don't like the vegetable kind." Said his traitorous mouth, completely ignoring his desperately pleading brain.
"Me either." Was the reply.
Oh, fuck it. Said his brain, finally giving up. Have it your way, you sodding, smarmy bastards. His lips, as if to confirm their triumph, swooped in and stole a kiss before asking: "Is there any sauce?"
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
After eating breakfast they had started talking, and that was when Gan Ning knew it was too late, that something irrevocable and dangerous had been cemented between the two of them, though he did not know what. All he knew was that something had gone both terribly wrong, and terribly right, and the ramifications would be severe. He also knew that it began with Zhang He asking him how old he was when he got his first tattoo.
He was reluctant to answer at first, thinking that perhaps this was some sort of ploy for information, but Zhang He seemed genuinely interested, and something about him put Gan Ning at ease. He took a deep breath and began to talk. Before he knew it, he was telling him things he'd never felt comfortable talking about with anyone, confessions of memories and emotions that had been buried so deeply for so long, he'd never even realized how badly he wanted to talk about them.
Gan Ning wracked his brain, trying to understand what it was that had brought these things to surface, and, more importantly, why was telling them to Zhang He, of all people. He wasn't sure if it was the way his eyes lit up when he found something particularly interesting, or the way he tossed his hair when he laughed, or the oddly endearing way in which he over-used the word "beauty" and all it's synonyms and derivatives, but Zhang He made him feel like he was safe. It was an indescribably odd sensation: feeling completely relaxed and secure while the man who had sliced your chest open and almost spilled your guts onto the battlefield, lay in your lap just seven days later with his arms around your neck and listening intently while you spilled your guts to him in his bed.
It was even stranger to have your would-be murderer open himself to you as well, and strange again to find yourself listening equally keenly. And it went on for hours; a cathartic exchange of truths, an almost psychic mingling that was somehow more intimate than even sex. It was by far the most utterly bizarre and uncanny experience he'd ever had, while simultaneously being the most deeply satisfying. Gan Ning found himself once again desperately wishing to be able to touch Zhang He. Finally, he mentioned it. There was a moment of silence while Zhang He looked at him, considering. Finally, he came to a decision. Leaning over, he began to untie the ropes.
Gan Ning was startled. "Are you sure? I mean…I didn't mean you had to untie me…not that I'm complaining, but---" Zhang He cut him off. "Listen," he said. "This isn't going to affect whether or not I'm going to untie you, so please answer truthfully. I'm only asking because I'm curious. If you had the chance, would you try to escape without telling me?" Gan Ning stared at him. "Zhang He, even if I did manage to escape, where the hell would I go? I mean, we're in the middle of Wei Palace---" He was cut off again. "That wasn't what I asked you." He said, sounding impatient.
"I know that you wouldn't be able to get anywhere, I wouldn't be untying you if I thought you could. I'm saying that if you had the chance, would you take it? Would you leave without…without saying goodbye?" Once again, Gan Ning was shocked. He'd never seen anyone look as vulnerable as Zhang He did while waiting for his answer. Gan Ning was quiet for a while, and then replied, "No. No I wouldn't." He was surprised for what felt like the millionth time that day when he realized that he was being completely honest. Zhang He, seeming to sense the veracity of his response, smiled warmly and finished untying him.
Gan Ning gratefully rubbed his sore wrists, then looked at Zhang He. There was a moment of tension that was so charged, it seemed that sparks were racing between the two men, and then Gan Ning was on top of Zhang He, running his hands ravenously over the taller man's body, kissing him like his life depended on it. It was amazing how underrated a person's sense of touch was; one of those things you didn't appreciate until you couldn't use it. Now that he had regained the use of his hands, he was applying them with a vengeance, thoroughly exploring Zhang He's body as if to memorize every curve of smooth, perfect flesh. And to his delight, he found that the long, black hair really was as soft as it looked.
Zhang He melted into his arms, and for a moment, Gan Ning had the miraculous sensation of everything being right with the world, and that everything would continue to be utterly and perfectly okay as long as he was holding the Butterfly General in his arms. That was when he heard the door creak open, and someone's shocked and horrified gasp echoed through the room. Gan Ning tore himself brusquely from the kiss and snapped his head up violently to see none other than Wench, frozen in the doorframe with an absolutely appalled expression on her face. He felt Zhang He shift nervously underneath him, and both tongue-tied men fumbled desperately with the sheets to try and cover themselves.
Shiiiiit….. Said his brain.
"Wench! …Uh…hi?" Said his mouth.
Heeeeey, kids! Because it took so horrendously long to update, not only do you get the usual A/N, but also a bonus-skit-type-thingy! TA-DAAAA!
Zhang He: "SQUEE! I got to make out with Gan Ning in this chapter! ((glomps Gan Ning and starts snuggling him))
Gan Ning: ((Is tackled to the ground by a 6'4" hyper-active lunatic wearing butterfly wings who proceeds to almost squeeze the life out of him)) 8O Oo "ACK! Zh-Zhang He! Breathing is important to me! ((Struggles for air))
Ling Yi: ((Twitch)) "I hate you, Crow. Really hate you." .
Providence Crow: "Pish tosh, don't be silly. You hate Gan Ning."
Ling Yi: "True…"
Gan Ning: ((Sticks his tongue out at her and goes back to snogging Zhang He. And before you get the wrong idea, snogging means kissing, so chill out)) XP
Ling Yi: ((Glare o' death, doom, and other such unpleasantness)) "I will get you, you miserable prick. I wiil."
Gan Ning: "I'm sorry, what was that, Wench? I couldn't hear you over the erotic moaning sounds your master was making while I groped his butt."
Ling Yi: ((Utterly disgusted with Gan Ning)) "I'm off to go make a voodoo doll or something." ((leaves))
Gan Ning: ((To Zhang He))"She's gone! We can make loved like crazed weasels now!"
Zhang He: "SQUEE!" XD
THE END
WOW! WASN'T THAT THOROUGHLY EXCITING AND STUNNING AND BRILLIANT? WASN'T IT? …wait…no…it wasn't…. Anyway, sorry it took so long to get this up, but what with the holidays and my dad's birthday, I took a while to get around to it. This was fun to write, because I got to do my version of internal conflict, which makes Gan Ning look schizophrenic. I'm trying to show the whole process of "falling in love", hence the gushy, chick-flick romance scene where I attempt to create a plausible excuse for falling in love by saying it was their "conversation". I think we all know that neither of them really care about having a fulfilling relationship. They just wanna get laid. And now you see why I don't like writing romance: I AM NOT VERY ROMANTIC. Something about being cynical does not make for a good romance writer, so I'm sorry if it seemed a bit forced, since it was. I'd like to apologize, because this was basically a filler chapter, but I swear, in Ch. 11, THE SHIT WILL HIT THE FAN. And how! Toodles!
