Ch. 15
Disclaimer: "Love is a snowmobile, racing across the tundra, when suddenly, it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come."
Sorry for taking so long guys! I was really sick, and then there was my birthday, and midterms, and Hanukkah, which I spent in New York and Maryland without access to my beloved word processor, and yadda yadda yadda. Plus, I was feeling pretty lazy, and decided not to update until after I got back from vacation. Which I now am, obviously. Because I was gone for so long, y'all get a special treat: multiple POV's alternating in one uber-long chapter, and a skit-thing at the end! W00t! Let's get this thang started, dawgs!
When Zhang He left his note for Gan Ning, he wrote that he had made arrangements for a masseuse. What he actually meant was that he had told Ling Yi to make arrangements. Perhaps if Gan Ning had known this, he might have been more wary, and the nasty business that follows might have been entirely avoided. Either way, he didn't, and it wasn't, and what's done is done, or so they say.
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Ling Yi handed a beautiful, dark-haired woman a small bag of gold coins. "Half now, half when the job is finished. You have your instructions, do you understand what to do?" The woman took the bag, nodding. "Yes, m'lady, I understand. Seduce the man waiting in the room; keep him occupied until the other man returns. Make sure he catches us in the act." Ling Yi smiled, though it did not reach her eyes. "Excellent. If you pull this off, I guarantee you a reward beyond imagining. Now go." Ling Yi watched her go, the cold, false smile still playing across her lips. She was more uneasy now than she could ever remember being in her life. She'd gone behind her master's back to violate a direct order from him. Never before had she done anything like this, and it went completely against her nature. Still, it had to be done. Lord Zhang He would never believe her if she told him about the pirate-spy's treachery, he would simply have to see it for himself.
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Gan Ning woke up to find himself alone with nothing but a platter full of dumplings and a note for company. Sorely disappointed at the lack of Zhang He, he stuffed a dumpling into his mouth and read the note. He couldn't keep from smiling a big, dopey smile when he saw how Zhang He signed it: Your butterfly. He desperately wished Zhang He were there with him. Gan Ning was suddenly filled with an overpowering urge to take the other man in his arms and tell him, "Yes, yes, that's right. You are my butterfly," and then make love to him like a crazed weasel. Mostly, he just felt possessive, as if Zhang He had given him something of himself that was for Gan Ning and Gan Ning alone to have. Slightly overcome by the intensity of his emotion, he sat on the edge of the bed and raked a calloused hand through his hopelessly tangled hair. He was a mess. He was confused. He was out of dumplings. He was in love. …Wait, what? His eyes went wide as he realized what he had just thought. Where the hell had that come from? He shook his head, trying to clear his mind. He couldn't be in…in…hell, he couldn't even say it, let alone be in it. So that settled it. It was just his brain being weird, probably due to lack of sleep, or malnutrition or something. Except… he wasn't sleepy. Or malnourished. Which meant his brain was just being weird for no reason. Yeah, that was definitely it.
…Dammit. That wasn't it. Why? Why couldn't that just be it? Why could nothing in his entire sodding life just be "it"? He groaned and dropped his head into his hands. The minute his eyes closed, the first image in his mind was Zhang He. Without realizing it, he smiled. Gan Ning watched with adoration as in his mind's eye, his perfect butterfly flipped his long black hair and---Wait! No! Dammit! Not helping! He shook his head hard enough that he felt his brain rattling around in his skull before letting out a frustrated shout. He was in love. Now that he thought about it, he realized it was true. A strange sensation washed over him: relief and joy and dismay all rolled into one. He felt different, as if by finally admitting his feelings to himself, a heavy burden had removed itself from him. He felt light, and free, and disgustingly sappy. He couldn't believe it: The Mighty Gan Ning of the Bells reduced to a gooey pile of sentimental slop. This couldn't possibly get any worse. Famous. Last. Words. As soon as the thought formed in his mind, the door creaked open, and his "masseuse" walked in. Gan Ning's eyes almost popped out of his head.
Dammit.
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Zhang He strode happily through the market place, laughing and pointing out various articles of clothing to Zhen Ji, who was at his side with one of her attendants trailing behind. "So," she said, "What exactly are we searching for, oh Master of the fine art of Bargain Hunting?" Zhang He twirled a section of his hair around his index finger as he paused to give a rack of fine silks a careful scrutiny. "Well…actually, I was thinking of buying some outfits for Gan Ning. He only has the one he was captured in with him, and that's rather… disheveled, at this point. And nothing I have would fit him; he's shorter and beefier than I am, and much broader across the chest. Anyway, it's positively a sin to have only one outfit, and his current apparel is so… inelegant. A throwback from his pirating days apparently, and believe me, it shows. He needs something more… refined to reflect his new station."
Zhen Ji raised a thin, dark eyebrow. "New station? Are you referring to his rank as a general, or as your new boy-toy?" He stuck his tongue out at her and pouted. "He is not my boy-toy. He's my man-toy. So there." They both giggled like schoolgirls at this. Finally, Zhang He sobered. "He's more than that, though, Zhen. You know he is, please don't make light of him." She rolled her eyes and sighed, and Zhang He knew this meant he had won. He grinned broadly at her before gasping as he caught sight of a particularly breath-taking vest and pants set. Perfect! It looked to be just Gan Ning's size, and the vest was black with stunning, silver, brocade twin dragons that snarled fiercely with their claws raised in attack. The pants were silver with a similarly snarling pair of black dragons twining around each leg with their heads at the ankles. It would look fabulous on Gan Ning. He immediately purchased it, then moved on to the next rack of clothing.
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Gan Ning almost fell off the bed. What the hell could Zhang He have been thinking? Apparently, he had forgotten that Gan Ning was into women. The woman who had just entered the room was definitely one he could get into. Well, the old Gan Ning would've, but now he wasn't going to, because he was a new man, and he was in love, and he was above temptation. Right? Right. And he was completely and totally not even close to being interested in this woman because--- oh shit, was she walking towards him? Why yes, she was! But that was A-OK, because he was not affected in the least! No sir-ee, ladies and gentlemen, and he was not going to blow his relationship with Zhang He, despite the fact that there was an extremely attractive woman telling him to lie down on the bed and relax. He was also going to entirely ignore the fact that he had not yet gotten dressed, and that his masseuse was wearing a very revealing dress. Yeah. Goodness, it certainly was hot in the room…
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Zhen Ji watched as a lovesick Zhang He fluttered with childish zeal from vendor to vendor, seeking more clothing to add to his already formidable selection. She rolled her eyes, feigning boredom, but truth be told, she was worried. This affair Zhang He was having with the Wu general was extremely dangerous. This was the sort of thing that got people killed on charges of treason, and Zhang He's head on a stake was the last thing she wanted to see. As they walked through the marketplace, her mind was in turmoil, trying to find a way to either talk Zhang He out of his silly infatuation, or do whatever was within her power to shield her friend from the inevitable consequences. Despite her desperate search for a solution, she only drew a blank. If the clever reasoning and twisted logic of Ling Yi was not enough to steer him away from this disaster, then she certainly couldn't talk sense into him. She knew in her heart that what Zhang He felt for this man was real, which made his situation all the more terrible. It was unavoidable that it would end in heartbreak, most likely with the death of his lover, but she could not bring herself to tell him this, not when he was so joyfully oblivious. She supposed that later on, she would hate herself for not warning him, for allowing him to face the impending loss without any prior caution, but it was easier than tying to make him deal with it now. She sighed. No, that wasn't right. She had to say something to him, there was no way she could let him walk into this blindly and still call herself his friend.
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"Zhang He?" Wrenching his attention away from the absolutely divine silk scarf he'd been contemplating, he turned to face Zhen Ji. "What is it?" He faltered a little when he saw her face. Something was bothering her. "Zhang… listen, I hate be the one to tell you this, but… you know this can't work, right? I mean, this affair you're having? You have to realize how dangerous this is, I know you do, but…it's not just that I'm worried about your life---which I am. I also don't want to see you get hurt, Zhang." Zhang He stared at her, baffled. "Zhen…What do you mean? You lost me with the 'I don't want to see you hurt' part. Gan Ning isn't going to hurt me---" She interrupted, shaking her head. "That isn't what I meant. I haven't even met the man. I couldn't possibly know whether or not he'd do anything to you. I meant how much you're going to hurt when---when it's over." Zhang He looked away from her, eyes to the ground. "I don't know what you're talking about," he muttered, obviously trying to convince himself more than anyone. She came to his side and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Yes you do," she said gently. "You know that this can't last. I'm sure Ling Yi's already told you as much. Eventually, you're going to be separated. If you don't find a way to get him back to Wu and safely away from Wei, you're going to get him killed, and very possibly yourself along with him. Rumors I can stop, but I won't be able to help you if they decide you're a traitor. My husband is not the Emperor yet, and even if I can get him to intervene on your behalf, his father will have the ultimate say. Since Cao Pi isn't on the best of terms with his father anyway, it would probably still go badly for you and your lover. Even if they don't kill you, they'll still kill him. And then you'd be completely miserable."
Zhang He turned to face her, lower lip trembling. "I know," he said, emotion causing his voice to crack. "I know but… oh Gods, Zhen, I don't know what to do. When I think about not having him with me… it's unbearable. Just imagining it is almost too horrible to stand. I certainly don't want to see him dead, but if I help him escape to Wu, I might have to fight him someday, maybe even kill him. And I know I wouldn't be able to do it, Zhen. I wouldn't be able to bring myself to put a single scratch on him. And while I might be able to live knowing that he's safe with our enemies… Zhen, what happens if we do meet and battle, and he's willing to hurt me? What if he doesn't feel the same way I do? I mean, he seems to care about me now, but I'm also his only chance at survival right now. He could just as easily be faking in order to save himself. At least this way, even if it's fake, I can still believe it's real. And I want to believe it's real, more than anything I've ever wanted in my life. Last night, he made me feel like I meant something to someone. No one's… no one's ever made me feel like that before. Even if it's a lie, and he's only pretending, I still don't want to lose that. But if I keep him here with me… I'll lose it anyway, won't I?"
Zhen Ji was quiet. She only looked at him with sad eyes, and gave him a quick hug. Finally she said, "I don't know what to tell you, Zhang, except that you're the only man I know who can make such a fine mess out of his own love life." He smiled a little at that. "Gee, thanks. That makes me feel better." Zhen Ji returned the smile. "Anytime, Zhang. Anytime." She paused. "So… you don't even know how he feels about you yet?" Zhang He shook his head. "No, I'm too afraid to ask. I haven't even told him how I feel. I don't want to scare him. Men get strange about things like that." Zhen Ji chuckled at his comment. "You make it sound as though you aren't one." He grinned, and replied, "So, what do you think of this scarf? I was thinking he could use at as a bandanna. Something happened to his old one, I don't know where it is." Zhen Ji rolled her eyes at his deliberate change of subject and took the scarf he handed to her. She looked down at it and gasped. "Well? What do you think?" She looked up, eyes wide. "By the gods, Zhang He, this is exquisite! If he doesn't love it, you beat him to a pulp, you hear me?" He laughed and took it back from her, fingering the fine material. The scarf's background was a brilliant crimson, the color and brightness of fresh spilled blood. Three, shining, golden tigers prowled in front of an emerald forest, the largest one in the middle and framed by a fiery orange sunset. "Well, now that we've kick-started the local retail economy, do you think you're ready to go back home yet?" Zhang He nodded. "Yes, let's go home."
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Gan Ning scooted backwards on the bed as the woman advanced on him. He wanted to tell her to stop, but his mouth wouldn't seem to work properly, so he was reduced to retreating every time she came forward. Gan Ning was in a state of total panic, though the woman, for her part, seemed to find it all very amusing. Gan Ning's skull connected with the headboard with a loud crack. There was no room left to back up. Seeing her opportunity, his assailant pushed her self against his chest and caught his face with her hands, pulling him into a fiery kiss. His brain struggled valiantly, but his body gave in easily, and despite the desperate shrieks coming from his mind, he returned her kiss with a passion. With a considerable amount of self-disgust, he felt himself become aroused as the woman pressed herself closer to him, straddling him. She plunged herself deeper into the kiss, and that was when Gan Ning heard the door open.
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Zhang He froze in the doorway. It took him a moment to register what he was seeing. Gan Ning was frozen as well, staring up at him from the bed with wide eyes. The woman merely looked at him, indifferent. Turning on his heel and without a word, he walked out of the room. As he left, he heard Gan Ning shout, "Zhang He, wait---!" But Zhang He closed the door, cutting off his plea. He didn't know where he was going, he was just going, and that was enough for now. He heard Gan Ning open the door and come running after him down the hallway. Zhang He walked faster, long legs taking giant strides, trying to ignore the tear that rolled down his cheek, the sounds of Gan Ning still pursuing him, calling his name. Fast though he was, Gan Ning's desperation gave him speed, and eventually, he caught up, grabbing Zhang He by the wrist and spinning him around to face him. He stood for a moment, trying to catch his breath, still keeping his death grip on Zhang He's wrist. The Butterfly General made no effort to pull away, and merely stood silently. Finally, Gan Ning was able to breathe. "Zhang He, listen to me. What happened in there… it was not what it looked like. I swear to you, I didn't want her to---" "Really?" Said Zhang He, voice ice-cold, eyes empty, except for the tears. "Because you certainly looked like you wanted her." The pirate groaned, frustrated. "Dammit, will you listen? She came on to me. I did my best, Zhang He, but I'm not exactly immune to feminine charms, and she was pushing herself into my lap." Zhang He just stared at him, face hard and impassive.
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Gan Ning felt his frustration building. He had to make Zhang He understand, he couldn't lose him. Letting go of his wrist, he took his face in his hands, forcing Zhang He to look at him. "Listen to me, Zhang He. Really listen. I'm sorry about what you saw back there, but I didn't want any of it. I don't anyone else but you. Do you understand me? I---I love you. Okay? I love you. I would never do anything to hurt you. Please don't walk away from me, Zhang He. Please." There was a moment of stunned silence. Gan Ning held his breath, scarcely able to believe what he had just admitted. Zhang He's eyes narrowed, and his face filled with…anger? What the hell? He pulled himself out of Gan Ning's grip. "You'd say anything, wouldn't you? Anything to save your skin. How dare you lie to me like that? How dare you try to manipulate my emotions?" Gan Ning couldn't believe it. He had just admitted his true feelings for the man, and Zhang He thought he was lying. Fine. Actions spoke louder than words, didn't they? If Zhang He wouldn't believe what he said…
Gan Ning quickly pushed him against the wall and pinned his wrists above his head using both hands. Zhang He struggled, but Gan Ning held him where he was. Staring into Zhang He's angry eyes, he launched himself forward and captured his lips with his own. Zhang He, in his shock, opened his mouth, allowing Gan Ning to force his tongue in. He poured his heart into that kiss, all the passion and affection and adoration he felt for Zhang He flowing from his lips to Zhang He's mouth. His butterfly succumbed within seconds.
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Zhang He was gasping when the kiss finally broke off, eyes closed and chest heaving. The tears were gone, now, as were his doubts and anger. It was true. Gan Ning really loved him. He smiled and opened his eyes, gazing down at Gan Ning. For a while, neither of them said anything. They didn't need to. Eventually, he spoke up. "You---we---should probably be getting back to the room now. If anyone sees us together like this---"
"It's a little late for that." Said a female voice that Zhang He did not recognize. He turned his head to see who had spoken, and much to his surprise, saw the woman from before leaning against a wall with her arms crossed and vicious smirk on her face. "My, my, I wonder what Emperor Cao Cao would think if he knew that one of his officers was a homosexual? What's more, I wonder how much that officer would be willing to pay to keep that a secret. We'll start the bidding at… oh, I don't know… one thousand gold pieces, let's say? Do I hear one thousand and fif---hurk---" Suddenly, she stopped in mid-sentence, eyesbulging. The familiar snikt sound of a dagger being pulled out of human flesh reached Zhang He's ears, and then the woman crumpled to the ground, revealing the knife wound in her back. Zhang He was horrified. Killing soldiers was not a problem, but witnessing the murder of civilians was a new experience for him. As blood began to pool around the body, a small, wiry figure stepped out of the shadows behind where the woman had been standing and into the light.
"Good afternoon, master. I apologize for this… disturbance. I shall have the body disposed of immediately."
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Ling Yi looked at the body with distaste. She hated messes. Wiping the dagger clean on the woman's hair, she slipped it back into its sheath under her robes. She looked up at her master and frowned. Judging by the way he was clinging to that pirate scum, the prostitute had failed in her mission. Blast it! That miserable pirate still had Lord Zhang He wrapped around his finger! Clearly she had underestimated him. More drastic steps would have to be taken, though not immediately. Better to let him think he was safe for now, and catch him later when his guard was down. She looked down at the body, trying to figure the best way to get rid of her discreetly. She hadn't originally planned on killing her, but the woman had seen too much, and had threatened her master to boot. That was an inexcusable offense, though Ling Yi still would have killed her even if she hadn't threatened lord Zhang He. Loose threads, you know. She looked up at the two men. "You should be getting back to your room, now. We would not want anyone else to stumble upon this… most unfortunate mishap." As she said this, her eyes found Gan Ning's, and their gazes locked in a death glare. He knew she had something to do with this. That was fine. She was already forming a new, better plan for removing the pirate from the picture, and this time, she would not be alone. She smiled to herself and dropped her eyes, letting the pirate think he had won. As he escorted lord Zhang He back to their quarters, she kept her eyes on the back of his head. Enjoy this victory while you can, pirate. Soon enough, you will be eliminated, once and for all.
Before I say anything, I would like to apologize profusely for the extremely long delay. Please don't kill me. Okay, that being said, it's Skit time!
Providence Crow: "You know something, Ling Yi? You've finally gone over the edge. You've lost it. You're nuts!"
Ling Yi: "If you had my job, you would be too. Butterfly wings! For the love of the Gods, he had butterfly wings! How in the name of the ancestors am I supposed to cover that up? And making out in the hallway? HE'S TRYING TO GET CAUGHT!" ((Eyelid twitches))
Providence Crow: "There there. At least you'll get to implement your crazy new plan in the next couple of chapters."
Ling Yi: "Why not in the next chapter?"
Providence Crow: "Because, the next chapter is going to be a smut chapter."
Ling Yi: "… I hate you. I mean really hate you."
-End
Yup, you heard right, kiddies! SMUT CHAPTER! This shout-out goes to Zephio, whose prize-winning plot-bunny made this chapter possible! Thank you, Zephio, for your marvelous inspiration! Inuyasha fans should check out his story "Too Much Inuyasha". A crack-fic if I ever saw one folks! I'm gonna go sign off now, since I'm typing this at a new year's party, and would like to go get drunk now. Hope you all had a great holiday, and wish you all a happy New Year! Toodles!
