Flippin' 'ell, I completely forgot to write this! Cheers to reviewers:

ZK – lol don't worry, he's only broken his gorgeous legs!

Germiphobe – here's another chappie! Soz for delay,

Sunrise – wow, long review! Thankyou very much and you are so right about Jordan and Peter Andre. Both two crappy sods we bloody well could do without.

Cazflibs – lol, yeah poor Rimmer :) hope you like the chapter.

Seen as everyone else has decided to update I thought, ah, go on then, I may as well update too.

…….

…….

Cat was looking exceedingly grumpy; he hadn't yet spoken to anyone, and was hobbling around on crutches trying to find the right colour to suit his broken legs.

Rimmer wasn't there. He was still in the medibay with Lister.

Cat rolled his eyes, chucking some orange silk trousers aside with a scowl and wobbling as he did so. He hadn't even remembered what had happened. One minute he was talking to Grand Canyon nostrils, the next he was looking up the nose of someone whose head was shaped like a second-hand novelty condom – gave him the fright of his life!

He looked back over the colours that didn't match, which were strewn over the table. Orange, green, blue, red, black, yellow. Have to go with the purple then.

He tried to pull them on over his plastered legs, but was having a lot of difficulty. He was jiggling about like a fat woman's buttocks during the sale at Gregg's.

Cat trembled, trying his hardest not to fall over, but not wanting to pull too hard, in case he ripped the seams. Now that really would be a disaster!

The door slid open, and a mechanoid bustled in. Thankfully it was not the one who was stuck on a loop of Peter Andre, as that one had committed suicide, and was currently lying hacked to death by one of its own arms outside the medibay. This mechanoid had heard the scuffles from outside, and had come in to help, being the nice mechanoid that it was.

Cat chucked the orange trousers at him, so that they fell around his head like a popped bouncy castle. "I can get changed by myself you know!"

The robot stuttered, "S-sorry sir, I was just wondering if I could help you sir!"

Cat groaned. The pain was beginning to set in again. Worming its way up his through his bones.

"My poor gorgeous legs!" he sat heavily down in a chair, flopping the indigo trousers down with him, "The world will have to go without their beauty for… for a hell of a long time! Everyone'll go barmy!"

Cat wailed on for about twenty minutes, about how unfair it was that his sexy limbs were being hidden from the world, how just plain wrong it was, and how he felt sorry that all the females wouldn't be getting the whole package.

After his rant, Cat looked up, finding the robot folding his clothes neatly in a pile. "What are you doing?" He said shocked, "You have to fold them in order of colour and sexiness!"

"I-I'm so sorry sir!"

"You should be! What would I do if I woke up and found my plaited socks mixed with my sequined green bow tie? I'd go crazy!"

…….

Lister had already opened his eyes. But when he saw who was sat next to him he shut them again, tight.

Rimmer was there. Last night's events flashed in front of Lister's eyes. Rimmer.

Rimmer had shot him.

Rimmer had shot him?

Git.

His whole body was aching, and from what he could feel there were bandages bound across his chest, holding his ribs together. Didn't feel like they were doing a good job, it was like trying to hold the Eiffel tower up by pieces of year-old used chewing gum.

Lister lifted his eyelids up slowly, looking at the hologram between his eyelashes, what was he doing here? Lister frowned. What the smeg did he think he was doing?

Rimmer noticed the grimace, "Lister?"

He grasped the younger man's hand as if to comfort him, but all Lister felt was anger and he fought the urge to crush Rimmer's fingers beneath his in a tight grip.

Rimmer was getting worried now, Lister hadn't yet woken, and it seemed as though he was in worse pain than before. He whispered softly, "Lister, it's okay, please, please wake up!"

Okay? It was okay? What was he thinking! Lister gritted his teeth, forcing back the words that were threatening to come out.

"Lister, please?" it was a heartbreaking plead. But strangely, instead of softening, as he usually would, Lister felt repulsed. He snatched his hand away from Rimmer's as if his touch had burnt.

"Lister?"

Lister's eyes were now open, and his disgusted glare was piercing through Rimmer's eyes, and he backed away slowly, hurt.

"Lister - please! It's alright - everything's fine now."

Lister gaze was studded with hurt and anger, and when he finally spoke the words broke Rimmer's heart.

"Get.away.from.me!"

"What's going on sirs?"

Now Kryten was getting involved, Rimmer could barely take anymore.

They are going to find out. Now you've blown it. They'll never forgive you now.

Rimmer could feel the tears pricking his eyes.

Who would ever forgive you anyway? Everyone hates you. You've never kept a friend for more than two and a half minutes, have you?

Shut up!

Wonder what they'll do. Probably leave you. Everybody does. Leave you manacled on that planet with all those ugly killers on it. I'm surprised they didn't realise what you were like in the first place.

Rimmer gripped his head tightly, No! Go away, leave me alone!

Oh. You sound just like your friend there, the voice laughed now, the sound ringing in Rimmer's ears like a bad record, He's repulsed by you. He doesn't even want to look at you. You make him physically sick.

"No!"

"Mr Rimmer?"

Rimmer shakily breathed in, wringing his hands. He couldn't look at Lister anymore.

So he ran.

…….

"What's the matter sir?"

Lister was past angry now, he had forced himself to stand up, albeit being supported by Kryten, and his voice cracked as he spoke, but he kept going, "There's no monster aboard Krytes, it was Rimmer!"

"I'm sorry sir?"

"Rimmer did it all, he made it all up! He shot me, and he pushed Cat down the stairs - I can't believe him, he had the cheek to tell me it was all okay! He could have killed somebody!"

"But sir, it couldn't-"

Lister cut him off, "I saw him! I saw him do it," there were tears in his eyes now, angry ones and heart-wrenchingly sad ones that glistened on his cheeks. He had trusted Rimmer, and now suddenly everything had gone wrong, he didn't understand what the smeg was happening. The only thing he could feel was the pain. It drove him on. And Rimmer was the one who had caused it. "I don't want to believe it but it's true! He's a lying weasely git!" Lister sat back on the bed, his head in his hands, "Why did he do it man? What did we do wrong?"

…….

Rimmer ran and kept running.

They were after him now; everyone knew what he had done.

He knew he deserved everything that they were going to do to him, but he was scared. He was always scared. His heart was beating hard, and it told him to run.

Run away.

Rimmer didn't know where he was going, he was gasping for breath now, but he didn't care. He just had to get away, so he ran faster, his legs were heavy like lead, but he kept going. He was somewhere in the cargo decks now, the dull throbbing of the ship could be heard, and the lights above were a dim soft red, casting shadows along the walls.

He stopped.

And it was then that he heard it…

A squelching. A heavy thick squelchy foot pressed against the floor.

His ears pricked up.

It was around the corner.

And he knew it wasn't Lister this time.

…….

…….

Review please, I very much appreciate it, and it makes my day! x.x