She lay upon the sofa, watching the movement of the outside shadows upon the wall. She could tell it was breezy by the way the trees were moving, probably a warm summer breeze that would envelope her if she walked outside or opened the windows. Except she couldn't move. All she could do was lie upon the couch and stare. What was she to do with her life?

She knew she would love her baby, there was no question about it, but she supposed she was in such shock that she couldn't feel anything just yet. It was nearly noon, and all she had managed to do was move from the bed to the sofa, which was a task enough, as all she wanted was to remain under the covers and hide away. She had ruined her life, ruined everything she had worked so hard to accomplish up until that point. She knew her life was getting ready to become more difficult than she had ever imagined. There was no way she could afford a baby, nor did she know what would happen when her landlady found out. She would surely be kicked out for being an unsavory tenant, a loose woman in the eyes of society. She would lose her apartment, and perhaps her job, since her landlady was her boss. She would be riddled with shame, and she would deserve it.

She sighed, telling herself to stop being so dramatic. It wasn't an ideal situation to bring a baby into, but it could have easily been much worse. If she were honest, it wasn't the shame of the status of her current life that she was so afraid to face, it was Georg. She was more than afraid to share the news with him. He would be angry, not with her, of course, but with the surprise of it all. He would likely shout and carry on, say things to her that he would later regret, she knew exactly how it would go. And then he would be gone again, her own temper would see to that. He wouldn't abandon her with their child, she knew that for a fact, but she certainly didn't feel ready to have that conversation with him.

Suddenly, the phone rang from across the room, and she sighed in frustration. She didn't want to move, cuddled into a small blanket and wanting nothing more than to be alone. She listened as the phone rang over and over until it stopped, and she finally sighed at the silence. She wasn't sure she was equipped to speak to anyone else at the moment. Ann and her friends were supposed to be visiting that evening, and she needed to figure out how to cancel without worrying her friend into showing up anyway. She had been such a welcomed help the day prior, but it left Maria feeling a bit cold, unarmed at the thought of sharing too much with the girl. The phone began to ring again, and she groaned in agitation.

"Hello?" Her tone was unintentionally a bit harsh, and she heard silence for a moment as the person on the other end of the line was taken aback.

"Are you alright? You sound strange." She closed her eyes, sighing at the sound of Georg's voice. He sounded so gentle and kind, ready to take action.

"Yes, I'm fine, just a little under the weather."

"I'm sorry to hear that. Do you need anything?"

"No, thank you." She fiddled with the cord of the phone, feeling tired from lack of sleep. She supposed she wasn't lying when she said she didn't feel well. "Were you calling for something particular?"

"Oh…well, not really, I suppose. I just wanted to hear your voice." She smiled, unable to help herself. "I miss you."

"We've only been apart for a few days." She chuckled, bringing the phone along with her as she returned to the sofa. "But I miss you too."

"When can I see you again? Are you going to make me wait until Mass tomorrow?" Her stomach dropped at the thought of attending Mass, the guilt of her condition weighing heavily upon her.

"I'm supposed to have company tonight, but I'm going to cancel." She wondered if cancelling would be more trouble than just going through the motions. "I'm not sure about Mass tomorrow, honestly."

"Oh…" There was silence on the line as he gathered his thoughts. "Maria, are you perhaps not ill, but unwell in another way?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, I know what it's like to have some days where it's hard to get out of bed." She frowned, wondering exactly how she could have possibly given herself away over the phone. She sighed, shaking her head as tears threatened to prickle in her eyes.

"…today feels hard." She wiped her cheeks, wishing she could control the tears.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He heard her sniffle, and his heart nearly broke. "Maybe I could come over and simply hold you?"

"Stop being so sweet to me." She laughed a bit through her tears, pulling her blanket over her legs once more. She knew if he came over, she would have to tell him. She wasn't ready to face it all.

"Would you like it if I came over? I must admit, it's for selfish reasons too. I'm worried about you." She smiled to herself, closing her eyes at the thought of being held and comforted. He always made her feel so safe in his arms. She wasn't sure she had ever really had that in her life, even as a child, but she was still hesitant.

"I…well, I'm not sure I want you to see me like this."

"I've seen you in many ways by now, darling. You think this one will make all the difference?" She laughed a bit, wiping her eyes once more. She had never been called a pet name like that either, and it made her heart flutter for a moment.

"Okay, yes. Please come over."

"I'll be there in fifteen minutes." As they hung up the phone, she sighed to herself. She wasn't sure how exactly she was going to tell him. Did one just come right out and say such a thing? Should she lead into the subject, and then gently tell him? She wasn't sure how on earth she would manage that.

She picked up the phone once more and let Ann know that she wasn't feeling up for company. Her friend understood, after some gentle persuading, but Maria could tell she wanted to object and come over anyway. Her friend did have some endearing qualities, but she certainly liked to be the one writing the story of their lives.

She rested her head upon the pillow of the sofa, sighing as her body felt heavy and tense. She wished she hadn't put together the pieces of everything just yet, wished for one more weekend of ignorance and, dare she say, happiness. She had begun to feel so happy with Georg and the children in her life again, her heart full for the first time in years. It hurt to think life could be so cruel in an instant.

Georg arrived with a gentle knock upon the door. It really took him more like ten minutes rather than fifteen, she noted, as he really did seem to be worried about her. As she opened the door for him, he frowned while taking in her appearance. She was still in her nightgown, her hair a mess, and her face bare of makeup and puffy from tears. She looked exhausted.

"I'm glad you're here." She smiled, and he moved forward to place a gentle kiss upon her lips before pulling her into a hug.

"Did you sleep at all last night?"

"Some…do I look that bad?" She pulled back to meet his eyes, concerned even more that he was seeing her in such a way. He smiled, bringing a hand to her cheek.

"You know I always think you're beautiful." She smiled, shaking her head.

"You really are a sweet-talker, Georg." He kissed her once more before closing the door behind them and entering her apartment. He was amazed that it always felt so clean, nothing ever looked out of place…well, minus the desk. He frowned, puzzled. It was quite a mess, and the vase that used to hold a bundle of flowers was suddenly missing.

As they sat upon the sofa he pulled her close, wrapping his arm around her shoulders as she rested her head against his chest. She curled up and pulled her blanket over her legs, the cat rushing to jump upon her lap. For a moment it felt like they were an old married couple, cuddling on the sofa after having known one another for so long that silence was comfortable and sweet. She smiled a bit at the thought, even though the nagging, overwhelming feeling of telling him about her pregnancy was looming about. He must have sensed it too.

"Do you want to talk about anything?" She frowned, wondering if it was the right time. She wasn't completely certain, after all. Perhaps it would have been more beneficial to go to the doctor to confirm her condition before risking a conversation that may ruin their newly formed relationship. She nearly scoffed aloud. Wasn't sure, she was four days late. She knew her body well, she was quite certain.

"Yes and no. I have something that I need to tell you, but I'm afraid of how you'll react." Her heart was pounding, she was going to try.

"I see." He felt a nervous sweat break out upon his skin immediately. All the possibilities ran through his head: perhaps she didn't want to see him anymore, perhaps there was another man…she did have a history of running, what if she were moving away?

"I don't want to ruin things between us. You mean so much to me." She continued looking to the ground, having difficulty expressing her feelings to herself, let alone to him.

"You already know how in love with you I am." Her stomach flipped, and she quickly met his eyes. While he had admitted such during an argument weeks ago, the morning after their night together, they hadn't addressed their true feelings aloud.

"Um…oh, I…um…" She stammered, and he chuckled before placing a kiss to her lips.

"You don't have to…"

"No, I just…I'm not ready to say that." He nodded, feeling foolish for choosing the wrong time to bring it up. She sensed his embarrassment, and placed another kiss to his lips. "It doesn't mean I don't feel it."

"There's hope for me yet, then." She gave a small laugh, gently pushing the cat off her lap so she could turn to face him. She looked deep into his eyes, floundering a bit as she tried to find her strength. "What if I promise not to react at all?"

"There's no way."

"I promise, I'll hold my reaction completely. Whatever it is, I'm becoming quite nervous at this point." She took his hands in hers, biting her lip as she searched herself for courage.

"I'm…I mean, I think I'm…" She looked down to their joined hands, sighing in frustration. "I'm late."

"Elaborate." His voice was quite cold. She met his eyes quickly, and she knew he understood without her elaboration.

"My period is four days late." His jaw clinched, and she couldn't stop herself from wincing. She could feel his pulse racing from his hands to her own, and she knew he was exercising more self-control than she could imagine; the kind of self-control they would have benefited greatly from a month prior. "I haven't been to the doctor yet, but…"

"Shh…" She nodded and stopped speaking, tears falling quickly down her cheeks. They sat in silence as she held his hands tightly, her heart threatening to explode from her chest as she waited…and waited. He didn't speak, only sat in silence, brooding. She nearly couldn't stand it, her body jittery from nerves.

"I…"

"Shh."

"Well say something." He met her eyes, and she could see every possible emotion behind them.

"Is it mine?" Her eyes widened with shock, and she scoffed at the insult.

"You know it is. How dare you?"

"You wanted me to say something."

"But to think I…" She couldn't finish her sentence, dropping his hands from hers in disgust. He sighed to release some tension.

"I'm sorry."

"Honestly." She crossed her arms, fuming a bit at his insinuation. He knew her better than that.

"I just can't believe it happened from that one night. What are the odds?" He was in shock, unable to properly form thoughts.

"Well I didn't do much research on the statistics of it, Georg, but I do understand my period by now." Her sarcasm frustrated him, and he shook his head angrily.

"If I'm showing restraint, you certainly could too."

"I'm clearly not taking it well either." They sat in silence once more, hearts pounding with adrenaline at the shared knowledge that their lives had just changed forever.

"What do you want to do?" The question was loaded with unspoken thoughts. She knew what others did in such situations. They were expected to get married as soon as possible to avoid ridicule and judgment, but she didn't want that at all. To trap him into a marriage with her because of an unplanned pregnancy felt so wrong, not to mention the fact that she simply was not ready to marry him. Perhaps she would never be, she wasn't sure. Her mind was so conflicted and messy.

"I don't know what to do. What should we do?"

"Do you want to keep it?" She looked at him in disbelief, mouth agape in complete shock.

"What kind of woman do you think I am?"

"A woman who perhaps doesn't understand all of her options."

"It's not some animal we've found in the street, it's a gift from God. It's our child." She stood, pacing about the floor a bit.

"Our child…" He shook his head, the words penetrating his icy exterior like fire, melting him. The thought of her bearing his child, watching her body grow as their baby grew inside of her, it made his heart skip a beat.

"You know, I would have much preferred arguing to the things you've said to me just now. You've called me a whore and an idiot in nearly the same breath." He sighed, standing along with her.

"Maria, I don't think either of those things about you."

"Well everyone else will too now. And to think, I was supposed to be a nun."

"Please, you were never going to be a nun." She met his eyes angrily before she finally burst into tears, bringing her hands to her face. "We will figure this out. I love you, I'll make sure you're taken care of."

"Taken care of? You mean money." He shrugged, floundering. He didn't know what to say, and he certainly didn't know what she wanted to hear at the moment. He needed time to think too. "Georg, you can't possibly love me if you don't even know me."

"What the hell do you want me to say, Maria? I know you aren't ready for marriage, so I can't propose."

"Please, God, don't do that."

"You tell me not to react, then you refuse to allow just that." He yelled louder than she expected, and she jumped a bit. "I'm just as taken aback as you are by this. I had truly assumed I would not become a father again at my age."

"Yes, my apologies for burdening you with…"

"Don't fucking do that! Stop baiting me into an argument. Do you want to argue?" She began to cry once again, her hands twitching a bit at her sides. Perhaps she did want to argue, perhaps she wanted to scream and yell and break something. Perhaps she wanted to slap him, she didn't know.

"You think swearing at me is going to deter me?"

"I think all I want to do is swear at you right now." He stepped forward, grasping her shoulders in his hands. "I want to yell at you and shake you, all in the same breath that I want to kiss you and take you on this sofa."

"Never again…"

"Don't act like you weren't an equal party that night. You gave me more than enough permission to take you to bed." She huffed, trying to push him away, but he maintained his hold upon her shoulders.

"You can't blame me…"

"I said equal party. You wanted me between your legs, and I wanted nothing more than to be there…and I wanted nothing more than for you to stay with me." His words were soft, and she stopped struggling against him with a heavy sigh. "This is not an ideal circumstance, but if it means I'm connected to you for the rest of my life because of it, then I can't be sorry for it. I have such a need for you."

"I…didn't expect you to say that." She bit her lip, unable to meet his eyes.

"I love you with my entire heart, Maria. We will figure out the rest." She hurriedly pulled him close, wrapping her arms around his neck as he held her tightly to him.