Title- Finding the Light
Author- Kim
Summary- What if - Oliver Queen raised Dick Grayson.
DC owns all characters.
Bruce stood, watching Roy as he slept...The teenager's eye's looked dark and sunken against the boy's pale face. 'He's seventeen year's old and still look's to me like the frightened and confused thirteen year old he was when I first brought him to live with us.' Thought Bruce.
He thought back to the argument they'd had the previous day...Roy had left hurt and angry at what Bruce had said...But it wasn't what Bruce had meant to say...as usual, he hadn't found the right words to say to the boy...He never seemed to say the right words.
Bruce reached out to place a hand, gently on the boy's head..brushing his thumb lightly across the boy's red hair...Grateful that Roy had been wearing his helmet when he'd lost control of the bike, he had been spared a serious head injury to add to the other damage to his body.
They'd been lucky..very lucky. Roy had slowed the bike to round a sharp corner, shortly before the accident..had that not happened things would have been much worse...As it was, Roy had a broken leg, a broken arm, as well as three cracked ribs and numerous cuts and bruises..it was miraculous that he hadn't suffered any internal injuries.
Roy stirred, and his eye's fickered open..."Hey Bruce." he murmured.
"Hey Buddy." Bruce said quietly, offering the boy a reassuring smile.
"No good asking how you're feeling is it." hejoked half heartedly.
"I'm ok...just tired." Roy mumbled sleepily.
"Leslie's given you something to help with the pain...It'll make you feel tired." Bruce said as he reached back to pull a chair closer,and sat down watching Roy's face.
"Where's Alfred?" Roy asked softy.
"He was here..He's just slipped away to take care of a few things...He'll be back soon." Bruce replied.
"Okay." Roy said, drifting back to sleep.
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A week later, it was agreed after constant nagging from Roy..that Roy could go home, provided that Roy rested in bed. Leslie would visit as needed and Alfred was more than capable of caring for Roy while he recovered.
It was late afternoon by the time Alfred had settled Roy in as comfortably as he could. Alfred went off to organize some dinner, and Roy drifted off to sleep.
Roy awoke shortly before Alfred entered the room, carrying a tray with Roy's dinner. "Ah Master Roy, I'm glad to see you're awake." he said as he carefully placed the tray on the bedside table and leaned in to help Roy sit up, before then placing the tray on Roy's lap, and taking a seat on the chair beside the bed.
Alfred leaned forward, tucking in a napkin and fussing as he picked up the spoon intending to help Roy when his soup. "It's ok Alfred..I can do it, I've still got one good arm." Roy said, smiling at the elderly man.
"Indeed you have Master Roy." He sat back watching as Roy began to eat, 'Sometimes the lad is too independent for his own good.' he thought to himself.
"Master Bruce has been very concerned about you." Alfred said casually.
Roy stopped eating and looked up. "He has?"
"Of course Master Roy...Did you think he wouldn't be?" Alfred asked.
Roy shrugged..Alfred smiled to himself, he had never been completely successful in breaking Roy from the habit. "Dunno...he never said anything." Roy said.
"Master Bruce is a man of few words, Master Roy..Surely after all your time with us you are aware of that?" Alfred asked, leaning forward to place a reassuring hand on Roy's arm.
"Yeah..I guess...He told me I had to choose." Roy said, leaning back carefully against the Headboard.
"Choose, Master Roy?" Alfred asked confused.
"Yeah..choose wether or not I continued with him as Robin...He said I needed to get my priorities right...Alfred...I won't ever be able to be what he wants me to be, I'll never be as good as he is, I'm not him." Roy said softly.
Alfred considered his words carefully, Bruce hadn't told him that he had said such a thing to the lad, merely that they had and argument before Roy left that day..Sometimes, thought Alfred..Bruce could be an ass, and it was again up to him to try to explain Bruce's feelings in a way Roy could understand. "Master Roy...Master Bruce sometimes say's things that are only a distorted image of what he feels...I have spoken at length to Master Bruce in recent weeks..And I can assure you, he has only your welfare in mind." lowering his voice, Alfred added, "He cares a great deal Master Roy...He wishes to ensure your safety...He does not want you to be a replica of himself."
"He does Alfred...He doesn't understand who I am...How I've had to push away the things important to me, so I can try to be who he wants me to be...I really wanted to be the person he wants..I really tried...He gets angry when I suggest things to improve my role as Robin...he doesn't understand it's more than just wanting to show off my skills...he only see's that things can be done one way..his way." Roy said sadly.
"Are we talking about your wish to use your Archery skills in your Robin persona Master Roy?" Alfred asked quietly.
"Alfred...it's more than just a bow...it's more than just Archery..It's all I have left to show who I am...Arizona..the Navajo..to Bruce they're just a promised camping trip once a year...I dream about them every night...the bow..the Archery..it's more than just an outer image...it reach's into my soul..it's who I am." Roy with emotion.
Alfred felt his heart twinge..even he had not realized how much Roy kept suppressed in order to fit into their world. "Perhaps you need to say these exact words to Master Bruce..."
"He doesn't need to." A deep voice spoke quietly from the doorway.
Alfred looked up to see Bruce watching...his eye's concerned and thoughtful. 'I shall leave you two to finish this conversation." Alfred said rising and leaving the room.
Roy stared sadly at Bruce, as Bruce took the seat Alfred had occupied. "I'm sorry Bruce." he sat quietly.
"For what?...Trying so hard to please me?...Roy I'm the one who's sorry...I never realized...I never looked deep enough to see what was truly important to you...I was content to try to mold you into who I thought you should be, and in the process I'd forgotten who you are...I never meant that to happen..I never wanted you to be someone else..." Bruce stopped as Roy cut in.
"It's not your fault Bruce...I really tried to change..I just don't know if I'll ever be good enough...I really wanted to be..as a way of showing you how much I appreciated all you've done for me all this time." Roy blurted.
Bruce leaned forward to look into Roy's green eye's. "I don't want you to change, I realize now, I never did...You have brought as much into my life as I have to your's...so there is no appreciation necessary...I did it because we are family...I was forgetting one rule of family...acceptance. Roy I've given a lot of thought to that over the last week or so...and I realize I haven't shown you acceptance.. by refusing to allow you to be yourself. That stops today...While your recovering, we will sit down and work out exactly what you'd like to incorporate into your 'work' and we will plan how we can do that."
Roy looked into Bruce's blue eye's...They were eye's he could trust..he knew that...Bruce had given him a home...and the stability he had always desired...A place that he felt welcome...and more...Bruce was giving him back himself.
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Eight years later
Batman stood watching the street below..it was a quiet night...a hint of a storm brewing in the air...He allowed a faint smile as he heard the soft footsteps fall behind him...Familiar footsteps.
"When did you get in?" he asked without turning.
"Bout an hour ago." a voice came from behind him.
Batman turned, towards the voice. His gaze falling on the young man who walked to stand beside him..The man was dressed in a costume different to Batman's own dark costume..It was more colorful...earth tones...a tribal arrow emblazoned on the chest.
"I told Alfred I'd try and find you...and we could finish your patrol together..maybe you can nock off early?' the young man asked.
"Sounds like a good idea...You go west...and we'll meet back here when we're done." Batman directed.
The young man launched a line. "Sure thing daddyo." he said cheerily as he jumped over the side, using the line to sail across to another building.
Batman watched as Arsenal disappeared..allowing a feeling of pride to rise..Before launching his own line and disappearing into the night.
end
