Dodge-Bobo

It was the biggest sporting event of the century. People gathered around from all over the world to watch the ultimate sport. The official dodgeball competition had begun. Well, actually, it had been going on for a week and two teams remained.

They're names were Team Bo-Bobo and Team Karakuri.

Team Bo-Bobo consisted of a short girl with pink hair named Beauty and a boy with white spiky hair named Gasser. Along with those two was a blue man made out of Jelly Candy named Jelly Jiggler. Along with that was a short guy with an orange body who appeared just like the sun itself.

Finally, there was the team captain. He wore an official Dodgeball uniform. He had dark skin and flashy stripes on the sides of his arms. Along with that, he had a light mustache and a huge shining yellow afro. His name was well-known.

He was the notorious Bobobo-Bo Bo-Bobo!

Team Karakuri had regular people who just happened to be good at Dodgeball and their leader was named after the team. If you know what Karakuri means in English, you'd understand why that's a sad fact.

Anyway, both teams entered the ring as Beauty commented, "Wow, we're in the finals and I don't even know how we got this far?"

Jelly thought for a moment and said, "I don't even remember us signing up for this competition."

Karakuri examined his five opponents high and low. 'This should be easy. Not only do they look weak, but it's five on twenty-six! They don't stand a chance!'

The ref blew the whistle and the game began. Beauty managed to hit one with the ball only to be pummeled by a battalion of balls. The Karakuri fighters laughed and said, "Weak ones perish first!"

After that, one threw a ball at Jelly. He grinned and said, "You can't hurt my jelly body." It was true. He felt no pain, but he was stupid because this also meant he was out. Beauty slapped her forehead and asked, "Doesn't he understand how Dodgeball works?"

Gasser blinded five of them with his fist of the Bo Wind and took out two of the five only to be hit seconds later.

Don Patch looked around and said, "Bo-Bobo, we're the only ones left!" Bo-Bobo was picking his nose when he came too and asked, "What's that you say?"

Don Patch noticed a ball right next to him. He picked it up and started to meditate. While he meditated, he thought, 'If I just focus all my energy on this very ball, I can take out three players with it.'

He ended the meditation by going into a frenzy. He ran up to the other team's side and was about to throw the ball

He ran up and shouted, "HAVE YOU MET MR. DODGEBALL, GOOD SIR?" The member braced himself for the impact as Don Patch stopped in his tracks and asked, "Why do you resist Mr. Dodgeball? Can't you see that he's madly in love with you?"

The man stood there with a confused look on his face as Patch continued his speech.

"All his life, he has been looking for someone to marry! His dream is to get married, start a family and not die single."

He stroked the ball and coaxed, "Don't worry, Mr. Dodgeball. He'll love you eventually."

He continued to stroke the ball as he glared at his opponent and barked, "You jerk! Now he's going to have to spend two months in rehab to get over this loss! But I can't stand to see him go to rehab, so I'll end his life right here!"

He hurled the ball into his opponent's chest. That was it. He was out. He noticed the ball hit his chest as he exclaimed, "That's not fair! You confused me!"

Suddenly, Don Patch held his arms in a position that made it look like he was holding a guitar while he said, "I will now sing this song in memory… of Mr. Dodgeball…"

He strummed along and sang, "Oh, dodgeball. You are such a wonderful dodgeball! You make my life complete… dodgeball! You are my sweet little dodgeball!"

Suddenly, he looked at his hands and gasped, "I DON'T HAVE A GUITAR!" Suddenly, someone hurled a dodgeball at him that landed in his hand thus taking the thrower out. He looked at his hands and said, "Oh, here's my guitar."

He strummed the dodgeball and sang, "Oh, dodgeball…" His song was cut short as he noticed what he was holding and exclaimed, "Mr. Dodgeball! You returned to me! Oh, but I can't stand to see you in rehab!"

He threw this new dodgeball onto the other side and took out another player. It worked. His meditation had allowed him to take out three players in one wig-out session.

He started to cry as he said, "He was so young. How can you be so cruel? You made me have to take his precious life away. He was an innocent dodgeball trying to find love!"

Karakuri growled and exclaimed, "You think you've won? We're taking you out!"

Bo-Bobo finally paid enough attention to ask, "How can you take us out when we have all the balls?" Karakuri gasped as he realized that all the balls had mysteriously gotten on their side.

Don Patch and Bo-Bobo placed army helmets on the balls as Bo-Bobo said, "Today is a great day for us all! You are going off to war to fight for your country! Some of you may die, but your grandchildren will know that you fought for a noble cause!"

Then, they shared a moment of silence and hurled every ball at the opposing team. This caused all of the players to be taken out except for the team captain himself.

Karakuri glared and hurled the ball at Don Patch's chest. He noticed this and exclaimed, "NO! I'VE BEEN HIT! NO! NOOOOOOOOOOO! WHY?" He quickly calmed down and took his place on the bench.

Karakuri laughed and said, "You can't win. There's only one of you left and I have every ball on my side!"

Bo-Bobo noticed this, turned into a baby and cried, "That's my ball! Mommy, he stole my ball! WAH!"

Karakuri threw the ball at Bo-Bobo, who merely caught it with his nose hair thus sending Karakuri to the bench and winning the game.

What? Were you expecting a victory celebration? Fine!

Bo-Bobo walked up on stage and pulled out a long list as he read, "I would like to thank my old mumsy, who couldn't be here to see my match! 'Course, had my teammates not been here, I would have had no one to use as a decoy!" He cried and left the stage.

The end