"What are you thinking about?" He smiled brightly at her words, turning to look at her in the darkness. They lay upon their backs, completely naked and bare to the room as the heat of their love making dissipated.

Their time at the beach had been perfection, every moment more blissful than the last, but something about being home and making love in their own bed was heavenly. They had returned just that morning, right before lunchtime, and everyone was quick to put away their things and rush back to her side. She hadn't had a moment alone with Georg all day, and by the time they had made it to their bedroom, she couldn't keep her hands off him, no matter how exhausted they were.

"I'm thinking about how wonderful you are." She rolled her eyes, turning to meet his gaze with a smile.

"I'm being serious."

"So am I. You don't believe me?"

"If you say so." She smiled brighter, and he grasped her hand between them, caressing her knuckles with his thumb.

"Well, what is it you're thinking about?" She sighed, smiling happily. Her body felt incredibly content in the moment.

"I'm thinking about how insane I must have been to think I could live a life of chastity." He laughed at her words, not expecting them in the slightest, and she met his eyes with a smile. "It wasn't meant to be a joke."

"I know, darling, I'm sorry." He couldn't stop laughing, his body craving the joy she was bringing to him.

"You're ridiculous." She turned her gaze back to the ceiling, stretching her legs a bit against the coolness of the sheets beneath them.

"I'm sorry. Tell me why you say that." He muffled his amusement, and she blushed a bit into the darkness.

"I don't think it's a secret that I very much enjoy being with you." He smiled, moving to pull her close to rest against his chest.

"I never dreamed that I would see you this way, it still feels quite surreal at times." She smiled, holding him close with her cheek pressed against his warm chest. "You know, I felt so inappropriate and guilty for it, but years ago I used to fantasize about you coming to my study at night and asking me to take you, right on my desk. I would close my eyes, in that moment of weakness, and imagine how you would feel against me, the sounds you would make."

"My goodness, Georg." She laughed a bit in embarrassment, and he didn't continue. He likely felt a bit vulnerable at his confession, as they didn't dwell much on the past. It tended to be a sensitive subject still, so they had tried to avoid it. He sighed into the quiet of the room, perhaps preparing himself to try.

"You don't know just how much I loved you then."

"I certainly do." She had been more than in love with him, desperately in love, and shaken to the core by her feelings. "I'm not sure I want to admit this."

"Please do." She gave a short laugh, and he placed a kiss to her hair as he held her close.

"I used to imagine you would come to my room before bed, perhaps to say something important that you had forgotten until bedtime. And then you would kiss me and completely defile me in my governess room." He laughed delightedly, rolling them over so he could hover above her face, taking in her look of contentment.

"My filthy little governess."

"Stop that." She laughed as he kissed her neck, and she wrapped her arms around his middle. He kissed her lips, running a hand through her hair before kissing down her cheek to whisper in her ear, sending shivers down her neck.

"Did you touch yourself as you fantasized about me." She gasped, pushing him away enough to meet his eyes.

"Georg, shame on you." He laughed, pecking her lips once more.

"So you did then?"

"Did you?" She swore she saw him blush, but she couldn't be certain. He merely chuckled.

"I'm a weak man when it comes to you. I did it more times than I care to admit." She smiled, somehow more proud than offended that he had used her in such a way. He placed a gentle kiss to her lips. "And you?"

"If you must know."

"I must." She rolled her eyes, and he kissed her cheek as she sighed.

"How on earth could I resist?" He smiled brightly, his fingers running through her hair.

"And you were to be a nun. Is that a common practice at the Abbey?"

"Heavens no! You know as well as I do." He laughed at her words, he obviously did know. "I suppose there really were so many reasons I didn't need to be a nun."

"And what about the years we were apart?" Eyebrows raised in question, she met his eyes.

"…I was terrible lonely." He meant to ask as more of a joke, but she couldn't joke about their time apart. There wasn't a moment she found humorous about it.

"That breaks my heart to know." She frowned, knowing they were headed down an unforeseen path. He had never wanted to talk about their past, their time apart. It nearly felt forbidden to discuss.

"I suppose there's no use dwelling on it, of course. My job made things less lonely during the days."

"Were you lonely during the nights?" His words were gentle, his tone calm, but she knew he was very serious in his questioning. Brow furrowed, she looked deeply into his eyes.

"Darling, are you still asking about self-pleasure, or are you trying to ask if there were other men?" He seemed a bit frustrated at the thought, but he nodded.

"It's difficult to be lonely."

"Yes." She didn't want to think back to those days, the days when her life lacked meaning, when things felt so oppressive and dark. She hadn't thought back to those days since the moment she saw his face again. She had at least begun to move forward in that moment.

"I don't mean to upset you." She realized she hadn't answered his question, and she smiled a bit.

"You aren't upsetting me." She placed a gentle kiss to his lips. "You know you're the only man I've ever made love to."

"Yes, of course. I didn't mean to imply…"

"You haven't. Though, I would be lying if I said I didn't think about going home with someone for something meaningless when I felt the most lonely. There were men here and there who I met at the bookshop or the market, places like that, who seemed interested in me, but I never could do it." She sighed, knowing he was not overly enjoying hearing her talk about other men, even though he was the one that asked.

"What stopped you?"

"The guilt and remorse I knew I would have felt…and my love for you." He smiled a bit, placing another tender kiss to her lips. "I nearly phoned you, several times actually."

"For what reason?"

"To hear your voice, perhaps. Or maybe to see if you still remembered me, I don't know."

"There is no chance I could ever forget you, my love. You've been a part of my soul since the moment we met." She smiled, glad he was holding her so closely.

"And there was a part of me that knew that, which is why I couldn't reach out. I was afraid for what I would do."

"I would have come to you immediately."

"Exactly. And I would have never let you go. We would have made terrible mistakes together." He kissed her, softly and gently.

"And yet, regardless of what we did and didn't do, here we are. We're meant to be, Maria. Like two puzzle pieces." She smiled, her eyes feeling tired as he rested his forehead against hers.