Ed was just walking along the side of an unpaved road, kicking pebbles that happened to be in his way, when he heard a familiar voice shouting behind him, "I'll get you for this, FullMetal!"

Ed had no idea what he had done (even I don't know what he did), but he knew that he must've done something to upset Roy. He didn't want to deal with it just then, so he took off running. However, Roy was a much faster runner than he was, and he was gaining on Ed. Ed would have to find someplace to hide, but where?

He looked up ahead and noticed a crowd of people standing in the street. What could they all be there for? No matter though, since it would give him a good place to hide. He dove into the crowd and quickly made his way to the front to see what was going on.

A man was standing on top of a wooden box, preaching a sermon. Apparently, people were listening. What a perfect place to hide, thought Ed. He found another wooden box, and stood up on it. (He needed all the height he could get!) Feeling around in his pocket, he pulled out a piece of paper with the Beatitudes written on it. His mother had written them down for him when he was little. This is as good a place to start as any, thought Ed.

So, he started reading off the words on his piece of paper in as loud a voice as he could muster. "Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth. Blessed are the peacemakers..."

Someone in the crowd heard that last statement and said, "Blessed are the cheesemakers? What's so special about them?"

Her husband replied to her, "It's not meant to be taken literally, darling. It refers to all manufacturers of dairy products."

Strangely enough, people were listening to Ed preach, and taking him very seriously. However, as could be expected, he soon ran out of beatitudes to read. Fearing that he would lose the interest of the crowd, and as a result be discovered by Roy, he grabbed a little boy's lunch of five bread rolls and two fish, and threw them on the nearby grass. Then, he clapped his hands together, and slapped them on the ground beside the lunch. Blue sparks flew out of his hands, and enveloped the lunch and the grass.

When the blue energy subsided, what was revealed was a whole bunch more rolls of bread and fish. "Eat up, there's plenty for everyone!" said Ed.

"It's a miracle!" whispered everyone in the crowd, "He must be the Messiah!"

Everyone started clambering to Ed, trying to touch him. "Heal my daughter!" "Heal my son!" "Bring my mother back to life!" they were all saying at once.

"No, I can't heal anyone, and I definitely can't bring anyone back to life. Get away from me!" Ed shouted. But to no avail, everyone just pressed closer.

"This has gone way too far," said Ed. So, he pointed his finger, and said, "Look over there."

Everyone turned to look where he'd pointed. While their attention was diverted, Ed escaped the other way. However, he didn't go unnoticed for very long. Someone spotted him and said, "The Master is leaving. Come, we must follow him wherever he goes."

Suddenly, Ed had the whole crowd chasing after him. Maybe it would've been better to take whatever I was going to get from Roy, he thought. However, he kept running. He ran out of the city, straight into the desert, and kept running. The crowd kept following. "We will follow you wherever you go, Master," they said.

Ed was running out of breath, and his pace was starting to slacken. He tripped and fell over a stone, in the process making one of his shoes fall off. However, there was no time to put it back on, as the crowd was once again gaining on him. He got back up and ran, even though he was missing one shoe.

When the crowd saw the shoe that he had left behind, one person picked it up and held it over his head. "He cast off his shoe," he said, "We will follow your example, Master." With that, everyone in the crowd took off one of their shoes and hung it off of their staff. Then, they once again started running after Ed.

Darn it, thought Ed, if I don't find a place to hide, they're going to capture me for sure. Finally, he spotted a pit that one could hide in, and escape from the crowd. He jumped in, only to find out that the pit was already occupied.

"I've been waiting for you, FullMetal," said Roy.

"Roy! How did you get here?" asked a very surprised Ed.

"Oh, I get...around," said Roy, "Now what are you going to do about that crowd out there?"

"What can I do? They got all out of hand," said Ed.

"I'll take care of it, then," said Roy.

Roy stood up, faced the crowd, and snapped his fingers, sending streaks of fire in their general direction. The crowd went running away madly, screaming, "It's the wrath of God, it's the wrath of God!"

Finally, that crowd was gone, and Roy dragged a very reluctant Ed back to his house. What Roy was mad about, we'll probably never find out, because someone saw Roy drag Ed into his house, and before long, the crowd was surrounding Roy's house.

They all started shouting to have the Master brought out. At first, Roy just tried to ignore this, but after awhile, it grew kind of annoying. So, he opened the shutters on his window and looked out. The crowd grew silent. Finally, one asked him, "Where's the Master?"

"The Master? Do you mean Ed?" asked Roy, "Why do you want me to get him, am I his mother?"

For some reason, that last word spread through the crowd, and before long, the whole crowd was holding their hands out to Roy and saying, "Behold, his mother! Behold, his mother! Behold, his mother!"

Roy slammed the shutters closed, and turned to Ed. "You had better do something about this crowd of yours, or I'm really going to give it to you."

So, Ed opened up the shutters and looked over the crowd. The crowd fell completely silent. "Uh...you can all go home," said Ed, "The party's over."

But breaking the silence was a bad idea on Ed's part, because then the crowd just started shouting, "Master, heal my daughter!" "Master, heal my son!" "Master, bring my mother back to life!" all over again.

Now, Ed was getting really mad now. Not only did he have to deal with Roy's wrath, but he was caught up in the middle of a stupid story that the author put him in to get revenge for the last chapter when he caused so much trouble.

"Listen," Ed said, "If I do what you want me to from now on, will you take me out of this stupid story?"

"Sure," I said, "I'll take you out of the story, but you're still going to get what's coming to you from Roy."

"But what did I do?" he asked.

"I don't know," I said, "Ask Roy."

So, I took Ed and Roy out of the story. Then, Roy snapped his fingers and burned Ed to a crisp. Luckily, Ed snapped back out of it immediately, since none of the injuries in this story are permanent.

Now let's just hope that Ed listens to me next time, or he's going to get it even worse.