Author's note:Can you believe its been a year since I started this story? Wow! time flies!
Anyways Thanks to Sheri for beta this. BTW keep Sheri in your thoughts she has a lot going on right now.
ENJOY!
Chapter 20
Wait.. What?
EDWARD POV
I paced the room we had been put in. Bella still hadn't woken up and It had me on edge. I had called Alistair after Jasper and I had loaded Bella in my car before I peeled out of my driveway. He was far away visiting his family so I took her to the hospital. He said he would leave and head my way but I told him to forget it and hung up.
I hated this place. I couldn't get any answers out of anyone. We had been waiting over an hour. The doctor had hooked Bella up to an IV and taken some blood and that was it. I haven't heard shit.
I was also mad at myself. I knew she was in pain and here I was trying to be a good husband and not be so demanding. Now I was regretting not telling everybody else to fuck off and telling Bella she needed to go to bed. The nurse who had left asked what her symptoms were and all I could tell them was that her back was hurting.
I let out a sigh and sat in the uncomfortable chair beside her bed. I pulled out my phone and saw that I had some texts from Alice asking how she was. I was irritated with Alice at the moment not because of the pot smoking but because she was causing a scene everywhere she went. She knew better than that shit.
I did have a text from my mother asking how Bella was and that she had cleared away most of the food and everyone took home some leftovers. Thank God because I didn't know how we were going to eat all that.
I really had to think of my parents today. They both seemed way too nice. My mother, I felt, was being genuine. I had actually talked to her earlier this week about her actions. It would be awhile before I would trust her again. She wanted to get to know my wife and if Bella wanted to as well then I would be cool with it. That also didn't mean I wouldn't be watching.
The old man on the other hand could kiss my ass. I didn't know what he was up to, but I wasn't falling for his nice game. He was being way too chill with my wife today and that had me thinking. Did he really think I was that fucking dumb? Did he think I trusted this new leaf shit he was sprouting? I didn't trust him, period.
I saw movement out of the corner of my eye and watched my wife's eyes slowly open. I literally jumped out of my chair and made my way to the bed.
"Hey sweetheart," I said as I moved a piece of hair from her eyes.
"What happened?" she said, all groggy.
"You passed the fuck out," I said, trying to keep the worry out of my voice.
"I'm sorry," she said and touched my face.
I gave her a confused look. "You're sorry for passing out?"
She laughed, "I guess I am."
She looked around and had a grimace on her face.
"What?"
She turned to me, her face finally starting to get some color back. "I hate hospitals."
"Well, I was worried. You didn't have a choice this time," I said
"You were worried?" I then looked at her like she was on drugs.
"Yes, Bella. I didn't know what the fuck was going on. I should have listened to my gut and made you lay your ass in bed." I was still beating myself up about that.
"I'm sorry, I felt like I had something to prove today. I don't know why."
"Prove what and to whom?"
She lay her head back against the pillow and sighed. "I just really feel like I'm a bother. I think that people talk about me behind their backs. I don't know why. I just have to prove myself for some reason."
"The fuck?" She shook her head and turned away from me. "Bella, you do everything. You are one of the strongest people I know. I don't know why you're acting insecure about everything."
"Because everyone has accomplished something. I wouldn't be anywhere at the moment without you." She turned back around and I could see tears in her eyes.
"Baby, you got an associate's degree without me plus you left on your own and got away from those fuckers. You're strong and you don't have to prove shit to anyone."
She wiped her tears away from her eyes and gave me a smile. I don't know why she was acting all emotional for some reason. Maybe it was her birth control? I don't know.
"Has the doctor come in yet?" she asked and I shook my head. I was sick of waiting.
"They took some blood and gave you an IV and said you were dehydrated." I went to the door and pulled it open but instead of screaming at whoever the doctor was, he was there and standing in the position to knock.
I moved away from the door and waited for him to enter.
"Ah, Mrs. Cullen, you are awake, that's good. I'm Dr. Michaels, I'll be taking care of you this evening." He had a chart in his hand and was looking through it. He sure was taking his time.
Both Bella and I looked at each other. Would he finally just tell us what was going on? I hated waiting. If Alistair was here he would have already told me.
Finally, the doctor looked up and gave us a smile. "So, we have your blood results back, and you're fighting an infection. Your white blood cell count is high. Your husband said your lower back was hurting, Mrs. Cullen?"
"Yes, it started yesterday. I thought it may be the birth control pill but now I don't know."
The doctor then looked at her confused. "I'm sorry I must be missing something here?"
Then it was time for both Bella and I to look confused. Did the birth control not show up on her blood panel? Why would the doctor be confused? I told that nurse she was on birth control. I mean granted she just started it but I told her she was on the pill. Couldn't tell her what pill though. Damn I was ashamed for not knowing that. What a shit husband I am.
"I guess I'm a little confused." He let out a nervous laugh. "I'm going to guess by you telling me that you took a birth control pill that you didn't know you were pregnant."
Silence. I literally stopped breathing. I heard Bella gasp. It was so quiet you could hear a pin drop. I started shaking. Why was I shaking? Suddenly, my throat felt constricted, like I was gasping for air.
"Mr. Cullen!" I heard it but I didn't know who was saying it.
"Edward!" That voice sounded familiar.
I blinked, and it felt like all the air came back to me at once. I started breathing hard, quick breaths that I ended up coughing.
"I just need a minute," I said as I walked to the other side of the room.
BELLA POV
I looked at Edward, who on the outside looked calm and collected, but on the inside, was he? What was he thinking now? Did he feel that I trapped him? I tried to blink back my tears not wanting anyone to see.
"Mrs. Cullen?" I looked at the Doctor.
"Yes?" I tried to look like I was calm but I'm sure my face looked like a grimace.
"Could I get you to pee in a cup? It may tell us why your back is hurting." He smiled at me with a comforting smile.
"Can I ask you a question, Doctor?" I said hesitantly. I don't know why I said it that way. I guess I was trying to remain calm.
"Of course, Mrs. Cullen."
"When I went to the Doctor's office the other day, they told me that the test I took was negative. How all of a sudden is it positive?" I was a bit confused. Did my Doctor's office know I was and lie to me? That couldn't be right, they would know we would find out soon.
"Was the test blood or urine?" he asked all professionally.
"Urine," I said quickly.
"It's possible that it could have been a faulty test or there wasn't enough HCG hormone in your urine to detect the pregnancy."
"Oh," I nodded.
"If you could just pee in that cup, Mrs. Cullen, we may be able to tell what's going on."
I nodded, throwing the covers off of me and pulling my legs to the side. Edward was there in a flash helping me up.
"I'll send in a nurse to collect the sample," he said as he walked out of the room.
Edward helped me stand up and that's when I felt the pain in my back. I looked at Edward whose face showed no emotion. I wanted to cry, I didn't like the look on his face. When we reached the small bathroom attached to the room he left me to it and told me to let him know when I was done.
It hurt to pee, I won't lie. I even had trouble holding the cup under me while I did but somehow I managed to pee in the cup. I got up off the toilet seat, holding the flimsy gown and made my way to the sink to wash my hands when Edward came in. He helped me back to the bed and then proceeded to move away from me. I'll admit it hurt a lot but I tried to focus on what this meant. I was a little shocked to be honest. Pregnant? Me? I was still in shock to be honest. What did I know about being a mother? I didn't know the first thing. Would I screw up? How would I raise a child and go to school? Would Esme go on a tantrum saying I was trapping her son? Alice would be upset, I knew.
I suddenly started feeling sick to my stomach. What if Jacob found out or any other person that wanted to harm Edward? I started gasping in deep breaths, but it was like I couldn't get enough air. I think I was close to hyperventilating. Was this an anxiety attack?
"Bella!" I heard someone say. I grabbed my throat, it was like I was suffocating in the room.
"Bella!" I felt someone grab my hands and they felt oddly familiar.
"Bella." I heard a calming voice and suddenly snapped out of whatever that was. My eyes met those shiny emeralds.
"Take deep breaths." I did as he said and my breathing evened out. He scooted his chair closer to me and held my hand but wouldn't look at me. I didn't know what that meant but I couldn't focus on it as the doctor came in.
"You have a kidney infection, Mrs. Cullen." I breathed a sigh of relief but then panic set in again. Would the baby be okay? A part of me had already become protective of the baby.
"I'm going to have them bring in a bag of fluids and I'm going to start you on a panel of antibiotics."
"Will it hurt the baby?" I needed to know.
"No, a short course of antibiotics should not. The fetus should be fine. I'm also positive that the pregnancy test you used was a faulty one. I checked the blood test again and it had a high level of HCG hormone. We checked your urine for one too. Instant positive as well. I'm also concerned it was a bad test because it didn't pick up on the infection."
I heard Edward growl some, but otherwise he didn't talk. "We'll keep you here awhile longer, make sure the antibiotics are doing their job, as well as the fluids. You will need to follow up with your OB/GYN about the baby." He then left the room as the nurse who had come in with him started hooking up different bags on the IV pole and then left.
I felt stupid and horrible. I pushed myself all day yesterday and today ignoring the pain in my back. I could have lost the baby. I started crying, I couldn't help it at that point. Edward was there wiping my tears away but they just kept coming.
****BID*****
At around 3 am they let us go. I had some medicine I would be taking, but the doctor had already said I was getting better. Edward was driving us home and we were approaching the gate. We hadn't talked the entire car ride. I don't know why it hadn't bothered me yet, maybe because I was still in shock.
Approaching the house, it was dark and looked eerie without any lights on. Mario the gate guy opened it for us and Edward pulled up to the garage. I got out stiffly while Edward stared at me. He opened the door connecting to the garage and we went through turning lights on as we made our way through it.
"I'm going to take a shower," I said softly, not looking at him. Now being home it was hitting me that Edward hadn't said anything. He had been somewhat attentive but it was like he was keeping his distance as well.
I quickly made my way up the stairs and into the bathroom stripping as I went. I turned the water on hot and waited. It didn't take long of course before I stepped in. After I was done washing my body and hair I wondered what hair and eyes the baby would have. My smile? Edward's? I really hoped the baby had Edward's eyes. They were so beautiful.
Did Edward even want the baby? He hadn't said much but we had just found out. Then all those other thoughts came through. Would Jacob come after my baby now? What about Edward's enemies again? I let out a loud sob and for some reason I couldn't stop crying.
I then felt arms around me, trying to comfort me. "Ssh, Bella, it's okay."
"No, it's not, it'll never be okay."
He looked at me confused. "What's wrong, Bella?"
"What if or someone else hurts the baby?" I said in between sobs.
"No one is going to hurt either of you," he said with such conviction. "I swear on it."
Inside my heart beat faster, he said he would protect us. Did that mean he wanted the baby?
"So, you want the baby?" I let out another sob.
He looked at me confused but let out a sigh. "Of course Bella, we talked about this the other day. Granted, it came sooner rather than later, but I told you I wanted it all with you.
I started crying again, but at least they were happy tears. He kissed my head softly. "I didn't tell you what I was thankful for." He said.
I looked up at him while the water poured down around us.
"What?"
"You." I was speechless, and I would probably cry some more if I wasn't already.
"Me?" He said although he has been vocal before about his feelings, this time it felt different.
"You made me feel like my old self again, All these feelings buried deep down you awoke, feelings I no longer thought I had."
Well shit that didn't help my eyes were full on crying now, my heart skipped a beat.
"Will you ever tell me what happened to make you bury them?" I asked. I know this meant his past with his father, his childhood.
"Someday." He said. "I love you."
"I love you."
I hugged my husband, and that's when I noticed he was still dressed in his clothes.
"Couldn't you put your clothes in the hamper?"
"No, I was about to when I heard you cry." It made me smile. He checked up on me and climbed into the shower for me. Now he was all wet.
"Come on, Baby, let's get you dry and into bed. You need rest." I nodded and he helped me up off of the shower floor.
EDWARD POV
After a restless weekend and a few days later, where I hardly slept, we were off to the Doctor's office. Bella and I had agreed to change Doctors since the other assholes couldn't get her lab work right. I didn't tell her but I had already had Jenks looking into them. They had jeopardized her health and the baby's so if I needed to I was going to take action.
After returning home and getting Bella settled in that night, I couldn't sleep. I was wired up so later that day on Black Friday, I had Emmett bring me some pot. He asked how she was and I just told him she had a kidney infection. I would talk to her when she was ready to tell them about the baby. Even thinking about the baby didn't make it real. I think I was still in shock.
So, after joining the pot head sibling club, I finally got some sleep. I was attentive to Bella the whole weekend. I did have to step out and handle some business, but other than that I had been home. I had even excused Jessica and Ms. Cope from coming to the house.
My mother and Alice had been up my ass about Bella, but I finally told them she was sick and that was it. Alice believed me but wanted to see Bella, I told her when Bella was ready to see her she would call. My mother on the other hand understood but something about her smile told me she knew something else was going on.
So, now we were waiting. Bella was laying on a table waiting to be seen. I stared at her stomach, unable to keep my eyes from it. My baby was in there, my future, another person that would have to be protected at all times. How would I raise this child? How would Bella want to raise it?
I started feeling sick to my stomach. My child would be next in line. Would my child have to be taught like I was? Trained like I was? Cut off from their mother and the rest of the family? I shook my head, I couldn't think about that right now.
"You alright?" Bella asked.
"Yeah," I said in a dull tone.
"You don't sound alright." This is one of those times when I love my wife but I can't stand her constant questions. I'm not alright but I'm not going to tell her that.
"Bella, I'm fine." We stared at each other for a bit until the door opened and the nurse came in.
"Hi, I'm Stephanie. I'll be doing your sonogram today." She started to get the machine ready and I couldn't be more thrilled at that moment for her coming in.
"Okay, so if we can't pick up anything with the external wand we may have to do an internal sonogram."
Bella nodded but looked hesitant but said yes anyway. I didn't know what an internal ultrasound was but it sounded bad.
"Alright, this should be warm." She then proceeded to squirt some type of gooey shit onto Bella's stomach. Then she put the wand on her stomach and began to move it around.
Both Bella and I stared at the screen in front of us, completely mesmerized. Although I didn't know what I was looking at, maybe Bella did. She couldn't take her eyes off the screen.
"There's your baby." I looked closer. There on the screen was this tadpole looking thing. It was so tiny. In the middle of it was this flickering thing, and it was going so fast.
"Is that it's heart?" Bella asked and now that I really looked at it, it did look like it could be a heart.
"Yes, let's see if we can hear it." She then turned the volume up on the machine and the room filled with a very quick heartbeat. Bella instantly started crying but she was also smiling tears of joy. Me, on the other hand finally realized that this pregnancy was honest to God happening. Seeing the baby on the screen and hearing its heartbeat were 100% true. I was going to be a father.
After seeing the doctor and it being confirmed that Bella was 6 weeks and 3 days along we were to head to the desk and make another appointment for 4 weeks later. Knowing Bella was 6 weeks meant she was knocked up one of the times in the penthouse when I came home from Ireland. I knew it had to be one of those times since I came in her every time.
This worried Bella because a few weeks ago at the Halloween Party she became shit-faced. Although the doctor said everything was fine at this point, and it looked like the antibiotics were doing their job with the infection, I was still worried.
Bella seemed ecstatic after the sonogram, and I'll admit I did too. The baby was alive and fine and it made Bella thrilled so maybe I could adapt to this thing quickly. I haven't felt fear in a while. It was one of the things my father pushed out of me. But since Bella has entered my life, I feel bits of fear at times and now with a child - fuck! As much as I had thought I had realized it in the Sonogram room, I still couldn't come to terms with it.
As we approached the desk, I noticed Bella stop. I was about to ask why until I saw her. Alice stared back at us as she was waiting at the front desk. She seemed confused until her eyes landed on Bella's hands which held the sonogram of the baby. Bella quickly tried to hide it but the damage was done. Alice had definitely seen it.
I didn't even know Alice came to this doctor, if I did I would have gone somewhere else. I noticed tears in her eyes, and I felt bad she had to find out like this. There seemed to be a silent stare off between Alice and Bella. I watched Alice's face harden. She glared at Bella which I did not like one bit.
