CHAPTER FOURTEEN

My eyes slowly began to open as I glanced around the room. My vision was blurry and my head pounded. I blinked a few times, my eyes beginning to adjust to the light.

"Morning, Becka." I heard a soft, female voice say to me.

I groaned and placed my hand on my forehead in a poor attempt to stop the pain. I looked around, trying to find where the voice was coming from. Then my eyes landed on a figure at the foot of the bed. I focused my eyes and smiled weakly when I saw the red headed diva looking over at me.

"How are you feeling this morning?" Amy asked gently.

"Like I've been hit over the head with a baseball bat...about ten times." I groaned, draping my arm over my face.

"That's called a hangover." Amy laughed. "It's what you get when you drink the entire content of the hotel bar."

"If you ever see me drinking again, you have my permission to hit me...hard." I said sarcastically.

Amy laughed and sat down next to me on the bed. "You feel like talking yet?" she asked me.

I removed my arm from my face and pulled myself in to a seated position. "Talking about what?" I asked with a confused look.

"Why you were drinking so much last night." Amy said. "There must have been a reason. People don't drink like that for nothing."

I sighed and threw the covers back, standing up and stretching. "Yeah, there was a reason." I mummbled. "But I don't want to talk about it. It's no big deal."

"Alright, I'm not going to force it out of you." Amy reassured me. "But it must have been pretty big for you to go on like you were last night."

"Can we just drop it?" I groaned and giving her a sideways glance.

"Okay, okay." she said, holding her hands up defensively. "I'm just saying, I'm here if you need someone to talk to. That's got to be better than drowning your sorrows all night in the hotel bar, hasn't it?"

I laughed slightly. "Yeah, I guess." I shrugged. "Thanks, Amy." I said, a slight smile touching my lips as I shuffled off in to the bathroom.

I pulled in to the car park of the arena and shut off my car engine. I sighed heavily and just sat there for a few minutes. I was dreading the possiblity that I might bump in to John in the arena that evening. I knew I'd have to see him sooner or later, but I just couldn't face him right now. I was still angry at him from last night. I was more than angry. At least now I knew why he hadn't returned any of my calls or messages, he was probably too busy with his slut. Sitting there thinking about it was just getting me more mad, so I opened my car door and stepped out, grabbing my bag from the passengers seat as I did so. I took a deep breath before pushing the door closed and locking it. I shoved my car keys in to my pocket and headed inside the arena.

I walked through the arena, glancing around curiously, making sure that if I saw John I could quickly duck somewhere and hide. When I reached my office for the night, I breathed a sigh of relief. I was just about to turn the handle and enter the room when I saw a note stuck to the door. I reached up and pulled it off, opening it and reading it to myself.

I stopped by to talk but you weren't here. I'm sorry for the way I've been acting lately. I feel really bad for the way I've treated you over the past couple of days. I shouldn't have ignored you, I should have been there for you. I'll come back later so hopefully I'll catch you then. I really wanna see you Rebekah.

Love you, John xxxxx

I narrowed my eyes and screwed the piece of paper in to a ball. I flung the door open, then slammed it shut as I stormed in. I placed my bag on the table and looked down at the screwed up note in my hand.

"Feeling guilty, John?" I snickered to myself. "Well that's just too bad." I said, hurling the piece of paper at the wall. I shook my head and started to unpack my camera equipment.

I shoved my equipment back in to my bag at the end of the night. Luckily, I had managed to avoid John throughout the course of the evening, but he did say he was going to drop by here again, so I wanted to make sure I wasn't around when he showed up. I suddenly started to feel a little dizzy, so I had to stop and sit down for a second. I had been feeling rough all day, but I put it down to an obvious hangover. I took a breath and stood up again, zipping my bag up and throwing it over my shoulder. I quickly hurried to the door and pulled it open.

I practically ran down the hallway towards the parking lot. I just wanted to get out of there and back to the hotel. Fortunately for me, tomorrow was my day off, so I could have a break from all this. All this sneaking around, hiding from John. I don't know why I was the one that was hiding. If anything, John should be the one avoiding me.

I sighed and shook my head, as I pushed the large double doors open, that led me in to the parking lot, wanting to focus my mind on something other than John Cena for five minutes. It was impossible. Even when I was this mad at him, he was still all I could think about. No man had ever found a way to get inside my head like John before, and I cursed him for it.

I shuffled towards my car, searching through my pocket for my keys. I pulled them out and placed my bag on the floor whilst I unlocked the boot. I opened it and threw my bag inside, closing and locking it again. I stopped for a second, resting my hands on the boot of my car. I closed my eyes and took a few breathes.

"Hey." I heard someone say from behind me. My eyes shot open and I spun around to see none other than Cena standing there, watching me. Great. Just my luck. "I've been looking for you all day. I've been worried about you."

I narrowed my eyes at John and just turned and walked away from him.

"Woah, wait!" John called as I opened the door on the drivers side of my car. "I just wanna talk..."

I held my hand up, cutting him off. "I've got nothing to say to you." I growled, giving him the coldest look I could manage.

"Please, Becka." he pleaded. "Five minutes, to explain, that's all I'm asking for."

"No." I said, my voice still low and full of anger. "I know it's all going to be lies anyway so you might as well not bother wasting your time." I snickered as I went to step in to my car.

John grabbed my arm lightly and stopped me. "What's that supposed to mean?"

I yanked my arm away from him. "I came to see you last night." I said.

"Last night? I don't remember..."

"No, you wouldn't." I interupted. "I saw you with that woman. I saw her go in to your room with you. It's funny, you didn't look too concerned about me then."

"Woman?" John said, looking confused.

"Oh, don't play dumb with me, John." I said. "I saw you with her, so don't even try and deny it."

John looked as if he was thinking for a second and then his eyes widened. "Oh no. No, Rebekah, you don't understand, that wasn't..."

"Save it, John." I said, becoming more and more frustrated with him. "I know where I stand."

"Rebekah, you know how much you mean to me." John said frantically. "Please, just hear me out, I can explain everything." he pleaded. "It wasn't what it looked like. Nothing happened..."

"You know what, John, I don't even care any more." I shouted at him. "I really don't. You go and mess around with whoever you want. I've had enough." I said, getting in to my car.

"Please, Rebekah, just listen to me." John begged. "You're the only woman I want. I love you so much."

"Yeah, well, it sure didn't look that way from where I was standing." I said. "I bet you couldn't even remember that I existed last night, could you?"

"Becka, nothing happened..."

"I can't deal with this right now." I said, shaking my head. "You...you just make things too complicated, John. You make me too complicated. You get inside my head and you make me miserable. I would have been so much happier if you never came in to my life. I mean, look at all the drama you've brought in to my life so far. What's going to happen to me if I stay with you? I'm better off without you, John. And maybe you're better off without me too." I said, letting the anger take over me. "Just...just move on...find someone else. Just stay out of my life, John."

John just stood there and watched me. The look of hurt in his eyes broke my heart. I instantly regretted every word I had just said to him. I wanted to jump out of the car and wrap my arms around his neck and tell him I was sorry, but I couldn't.

John knelt down beside me and reached out his hand, brushing the loose hair from my face and running his fingertips down my cheek. He leaned inside the car and placed a soft kiss on my lips.

"Okay." he whispered. "If you wanna give up on us and run away, be my guest. If you can't trust me enough to believe me when I tell you nothing happened last night, then maybe you're right. Maybe we were just kidding ourselves thinking that this could ever work out." John said, standing up and taking a step backwards. "I do love you though, Rebekah, and that's never gonna change."

I closed my eyes to stop the tears as I mustered the strength to just close the car door and start the engine. I wound down the window and looked up at John.

"Good-bye, John." I said quietly, not even waiting for a response from him before I sped off towards the hotel.

I wiped away my tears the best I could when I pulled in to the hotel parking lot. I hated myself for saying those things to John. They were far from the truth. He didn't make me miserable, not by a long shot. And I certainly didn't want him to move on and find someone else. I wanted him to be with me. I wanted to be with him. I loved him.

I rested my head on the steering wheel and let the tears fall again. What had I just done? What an idiot I had been. John was the best thing that had ever happened to me and I'd blown it? I'd ended it because of my own paranoia? I'd just made the biggest mistake of my life. I loved him. I needed him. I had to find a way to get him back.

I tried to easy up on the cliffhanger this time! Hee hee! Hope y'all like this chapter! R&R please guys:)