Hey Peeps! Okay, who else loved the episode Hallelujah yesterday? It was awesome. Well, I'm still not getting as many reviews as I wanted but I'm going to keep writing and hopefully get some other reviews. So here's the next chapter.

Disclaimer: I do not own Instant Star. If I did Tommy and Jude would've actually kissed in Hallelujah.

Chapter 4: Addiction

It was about 3 weeks that Jude was on the pill, and she was hiding it well. But when she wasn't high off them, she came to her senses, for only a moment. She knew it was stupid, and she knew it was only going to help for a while. It could even be dangerous if she takes too many. But once she saw Tommy and Sadie together, she couldn't take the pain. The only way she could take it away was to take the pills. Jude had only been at the studio once a week and Darius didn't like it. He told Tommy to go to her and bring her to the studio or her job will be in jeopardy. Tommy jumped into his viper and went to the Harrison's house as fast as he could. He hadn't seen Jude for four days and he was getting worried. It used to be him that always ran away from everything, and Jude said it wasn't fair, that it wasn't right. So now why was she? He pulled up in the driveway. Jude was on the couch reading a magazine when she heard brakes screeching. Only a few minutes later she heard a knock on the door. She looked away from the door hoping that who ever it was would get the hint and go away. But they knocked once again. She stood up and opened the door.

Jude: Tommy? What are you doing here?

Tommy heard the shock and anger in her voice.

Tommy: I came to see how you are.

Jude: I'm perfectly fine. So why don't you go off and find Sadie?

Tommy: What?

Jude just looked at him trying to hold the pain inside, trying to take control. But she was craving the pills now. Her voice started to shake.

Jude: I have to, umm, you know, why don't you just go for now. I, umm, just…

Tommy: Jude, is something wrong. It seems like you can barely speak.

His eyes were full of concern but Jude refused to look at them. The craving was getting stronger; she tried to get Tommy out.

Jude: Everything's fine, just go.

Tommy: No, Jude something's wrong. Just tell me.

Jude had enough, she ran upstairs into her room. She went into her room and looked through her backpack again. There she took out a bag of pills. She took three in her hands and got a water bottle. Jude was about to take them but she had a feeling that someone was watching her. She found she was right when she saw Tommy in her doorway. Horror was in his eyes as his eyes turned bloodshot. His horror matched Jude's as he choked out a question.

Tommy: Jude, what are you doing?

Jude: Nothing.

Tommy: What are those?

Jude: Nothing.

Tommy walked to her quickly and forcefully took the pills out of her hands. He was at the brink of tears as Jude looked at him scared.

Tommy: Jude, how long have you been taking these?

Jude: What do you care? Why don't you just find your girlfriend and leave me along?

Tommy: What are you talking about? I don't have a girlfriend.

Jude: Yea, right. I've seen you and Sadie together.

Tommy: Jude, we're not together, I swear. But, we're not talking about that. I want to know how long and why.

Jude: Just go Tommy, I don't want you here! Go away!

Tommy: No I won't.

Jude: Go away! Get out!

Tommy grabbed her. She struggle to get free but he was too strong.

Jude: What are you doing? Get off of me!

Tommy: I'm not going anywhere. No matter how much you yell, no matter how much you struggle I won't leave. I won't let you go.

Jude: Tommy, no, please don't.

Tommy could see her tears coming through her eyes.

Tommy: C'mon Jude, cry. Its okay, I'm here.

Jude: No Tommy, you have to go, please.

She was pleading her heart out but he wouldn't let her go. Tommy looked straight into her eyes.

Tommy: Jude, cry, go on. Please, cry.

Jude: I won't cry, not over you. I can't. There's no reason.

Tommy: Jude…

Jude knew what was coming, but for once, she didn't want to hear it. She couldn't, she had to be strong.

Jude: No…

Tommy: I…

Jude: No!

She covered her ears with her hands.

Tommy: Jude, listen to me, please. I need to tell you the truth.

Jude: No, don't listen.

Tommy: I love you.

Jude: No.

Tommy: I love you.

Jude: This is not happening.

Tommy: Jude!

He turned her around to make sure that she was looking at his eyes. His truthful eyes that she couldn't look away from.

Tommy: I love you.

Jude was starting to cry.

Tommy: I love you Jude. I love you more than anything.

Jude: Tommy…

She couldn't finish her sentence. She threw her arms around Tommy's neck and there, she cried on his shoulder. Tommy took a deep sigh and stroked her hair.

Tommy: It's okay Jude. I'm here.

Jude: Tommy please, promise you'll always be here. Please Tommy promise that.

Tommy: Shh, I promise, I'll always be here. No more running.

Jude: Oh Tommy, I'm so sorry, for everything. I'm so sorry.

It felt good for Jude to cry. She thought that she would never cry again and there she was sobbing on Tommy's shoulder. She felt guilty, sad, happy, relieved, and angry at herself all at once.

Jude and Tommy sat on the floor of Jude's bedroom leaning against her bed. They were talking about the last month and all the happened. What everything meant and why everything happened. It seemed everything was coming out of the open and Jude couldn't help but smile.

Jude: Tommy, I'm sorry I said that I hated you. You should know that, it's not true…at all. I was just angry and I said some things that I didn't mean.

Tommy: It's okay. But why were you taking the pills? I mean, do you have any idea how stupid and pointless that was?

Jude: Yea, I said that to myself plenty of times.

Tommy: So why did you take them in the first place?

Jude: When you were in the hospital, I was so scared. I don't know of what of, but I just felt so much pain in me that I couldn't stand it. I needed to runaway from all these feelings that overwhelmed me, anger, hate, guilt, sadness, and…other things.

Tommy: What other things?

Jude: Nothing, anyway so…

Tommy: No, Jude, tell me. What other feelings did you have?

Jude didn't want him to know that she felt love. She still couldn't trust him enough. How was she? Could you blame her? This guy did almost everything possible to lose her trust. But he did confess, unless it was another lie. Tommy had become a pro. She just stared at him and tried to make up an excuse.

Jude: I don't know. Really, I was just so messed up.

Tommy just kept staring at Jude knowing she was lying and she felt the craving for the pills again. They were next to Tommy's side. Maybe she could just reach over saying that she was going to throw them away and take them downstairs. 'No! Stop Jude, you can't think that way' Jude thought to herself. She was trying to snap out of it, but it didn't work. She reached over to Tommy's side and Tommy stopped her by grabbing her wrist.

Tommy: What are doing?

Jude: I'm just going to throw the pills away. So I don't have to deal with them anymore.

Tommy looked at her in disbelief.

Jude: What? I swear I won't take them again. It's stupid and pointless, just like you said.

Tommy: Then I'll throw them away myself.

Jude: C'mon Tommy, let me just do it.

Tommy: No Jude.

Jude: Would you just give me the damn pills!

Tommy grabbed Jude's shoulder and it startled her a bit. Her eyes were widened. Tommy gave her a soft embrace and whispered in Jude's ear. It send cold chills down her spine.

Tommy: Jude, listen to yourself. You need to stop taking these or you'll get addicted, if you're not already. Please, Jude, promise me you'll never do anything so stupid again.

Jude could hear Tommy's voice shake. He let go of her and there were tears in his eyes. But behind them was a genuine concern of her and fear. Jude didn't know what to think.

Tommy: Jude, please promise me. I'm begging you please!

Jude: Tommy I…you really do love me.

Tommy: Yes, I do.

Jude thought for a moment still confused.

Jude: Okay, I promise.

Tommy smiled and scoot a bit closer to Jude. He touched her soft skin on her cheek. Jude closed her eyes feeling his warm finger tips against her face. Jude opened her eyes and saw Tommy leaning in. She was frozen again. She couldn't move as she felt his moist lips against hers. She kissed him back but then pulled away quickly with tears in her eyes. She stood up from the floor. Tommy followed her move and looked in her eyes.

Tommy: What's wrong?

Jude: This is. Everything is wrong, this isn't real, it can't be.

Tommy: What are you talking about? This is real, it's the real thing. I love you, why can't you accept that?

Jude: Because, I can't love you back.

Tommy: Why not? Name one reason please and I'll leave you alone.

Jude: I have to go.

Jude rushed down the stairs and grabbed her keys and ran to her mustang. She quickly got into the car and turned on the engine. Tommy came running after and went to the window banging on it.

Tommy: Jude! What happen to no more running away!

Jude: I can't Tommy!

Tommy: Can't what, please Jude stop hiding everything just tell me!

Jude skidded off leaving a broken down Tommy in her driveway.

Jude made it to another mysterious house and took a deep breath. She opened the car door and walked up the front steps. She closed her eyes and took another deep breath before knocking. They opened the door and looked surprised.

Jude: Hi.

Well, I know it's kinda short but I wanted a cliffhanger at the end and this was the best place to stop it. Hope you keep reading and REVIEWING! thanks...love ya...and look out for my two new stories Tell Me and Third Wheel. Coming soon to a FanFic near you.