Connected
By Misha
Disclaimer- These characters are the property of NBC, Aaron Sorkin, or whoever. I'm not writing this for profit in any way, shape, or form, but because I have a lot of spare time on my hands.
Author's Notes- This is a companion to "Bound Together". Like the other one, his is a very strange, slightly disturbing story. Somebody suggested that I write Josh's PoV and I couldn't resists, so here it is. It's set after "Posse Comitatus" and focuses on Josh and Donna. Well mostly Josh, but there's some serious Josh/Donna action, just not very happy action, there's also some Josh/Amy. As I said, it's strange. I don't know what possessed me to write it, but I couldn't resist. That's all, enjoy!
Spoilers- "Posse Comitatus" and back.
Archive- Wherever, just ask first.
Rating- PG-13.
Josh lay still, pretending to sleep for at least a few minutes longer.
When he opened his eyes, he knew things would change. He and Donna would slip into the awkward morning after ritual they had long since perfected. He'd rather put that off for as long as possible.
He had woken up when Donna had moved from his embrace to the answer the phone, but he knew that wasn't the best moment to let her know it. Especially given who it had been on the other end of the phone.
Josh had known instantly and had felt the shame wash over him in waves. He was laying in another woman's bed, while said woman talked to his girlfriend and pretended that she had no idea where he was. He felt like the scum of the Earth and was sure that Donna felt the same way.
He knew that he shouldn't be here. That this thing with Donna should never have started, though it did. And yet he couldn't end it.
He had thought that he had. That they had gone back to whatever they had been before, but he had been wrong. Because the first time something bad had happened he had gone back to her.
And it shook him to the core.
He had been with Amy when he had learnt the news. She had been willing to offer him any comfort that she could.
Yet, he hadn't taken it. Instead he had fled her apartment and run to another woman. He had found the comfort he needed in the other woman's arm, sating himself with her body.
And now, as he lay still in her bed, he had to admit something.
He loved Donna.
Well, he had always known that. But now, now he knew that he loved her in a way that he should love Amy. He didn't want to, had tried not to, but no matter how hard he fought it, he couldn't escape it.
And he knew that though she probably wasn't willing to admit it, Donna felt the same way about him. They were connected, the years and the pain had bonded them in a way that nothing could tear apart.
No matter how much they tried to fight it, they would always end up back together, because they were meant to be.
But at the moment, it was complicated.
There were too many issues.
So they hid from it. They pretend to be just friends, but always ended up back in the same place. Because they couldn't help it.
Still, that didn't make it right. Didn't make him feel any less guilty.
Yet, as he lay there in his assistant's bed, thinking about what lie he would tell his girlfriend, he knew that it wasn't a one time thing.
It would happen again.
Because they couldn't help it. When the world went crazy, he sought sanity. And she was his sanity, his refuge from any problem.
Donna could comfort him in a way that no one else ever would be able to. She could reach him in a way that no one else could.
Even now, as the morning after sunk in, he took comfort in feeling her presence next to him. Despite the fact that he couldn't handle it, despite the fact that he knew it was wrong, he loved her and he always would.
They were connected.
And would be for the rest of time.
Nothing could stop that.
The End
