The Pink Bunny

This story is dedicated to a good friend of mine. We were watching Pretear and the car driver had dressed in a pink bunny suit. It got me thinking of how a certain someone would look in the same outfit. And thus this story was born. So i want to say thank you to my friend who inspired me to write this. Also Hellsing and Alucard don't belong to me! Enjoy!


It was an normal quiet night at the Hellsing Organisation. Alucard was pissing of Sir Integra as per usual and it was officially the Easter holidays. One Seras Victoria was walking wearily around her master. He seemed bored and that was usually a bad thing. For once Sir Integra would yell at him to leave her alone, he would come to use her to amuse himself. Seras was walking around the garden when she heard Walter calling her name.

"Ah, Ms Victoria I have been looking for you. Sir Integra would like to speak to you in her office." Said the butler.

I wonder what she wants now?

"Thank you Walter, I'll go now!" Said Seras as she headed towards the manor.


KNOCK, KNOCK!

"Come in." Said Sir Integra.

Seras walked into Sir Integra's office to see that Alucard was waiting for her as well.

"Your late Police Girl." Said Alucard grinning.

"Sorry Master. Sir Integra, Walter said you wanted to speak to me?" Said Seras.

"Yes i did. Victoria, you and Alucard are to go undercover at an Easter party tonight. I have reason to believe that a group of rogue vampires are planning on having a night out on London. Your costumes have been prepared are are waiting for you in your rooms. Here's the Intel on the situation." Said Sir Integra handing manilla folders to both vampires.

She sat back in her chair and watched as the two flipped through the information they were given.

"Oh my. Please don't tell me Paladin Alexander Anderson will be their?" Said Seras frantically.

"This should be fun. Time to change Police Girl." Said Alucard.

"Yes master." Said Seras as Alucard phased through the wall.


Seras went down to her room and saw that a costume box was sitting on her coffin bed. She went and pulled out her costume.

Oh i think it's a tad to dark for my liking but it's nice!

Seras got changed and then went back up to Sir Integra's office.

"Miss Victoria! What are you wearing!" Said Walter as she passed him.

"Do you like it? This is my undercover costume. See you later Walter!" Said Seras, as she knocked on Sir Integra's door.

"Enter!" Said Sir Integra's amused voice.

Seras did just that to come face to face with her master in a pink bunny costume and a bad mood to boot.

"Why does the Police Girl get to wear black and I'm in this?" Yelled Alucard to his master.

"Well if you want you can swap with her." Said Integra primly.

Alucard took one look at Seras costume and then folded his arms.

"No way! I still have some dignity left." Muttered the Nosferatu.

"What's wrong with my outfit?" Said Seras looking at her costume.

Seras was wearing all black that consisted of a leotard, fishnet stockings, bunny ears and tail and thigh high's.

"Police Girl, i would rather kiss 'ze French pig' than wear your costume." Said Alucard.

"Ello, did some one call me?" Said Pip entering the office.

Alucard glared at him. Pip took no notice and he started checking out Seras.

"I am envious of you Alucard. I must zay zat 'oo 'ave a great power over ze police girl. I would love to be 'er master." Said Pip smirking while he eyed Seras lustily.

"Bloody French perverted pig!" Screamed Seras as she chased Pip down the hall and proceeded to beat him to a pulp.


"Police Girl will you hurry up, we're late enough as it is." Said an angry Alucard as he walked down the streets of London.

"Well i did tell you not to wait for me master. I was just going to make sure Pip got to the hospital safely." Said an embarrassed Seras.

Pip had to air lifted to hospital after Seras accidentally punctured one of his lungs.

"I think this is the place Police Girl." Said Alucard stopping in front of a building.

"You've got to be kidding me?" Exclaimed Seras.

"I'm not, this is the address." Said Alucard seriously.

The place that they had stopped at looked old and broken down. A sign that said 'Museum' overhead. Taped on the front door was another sign that read 'Easter ball, costume party, dress up and have fun!'

Let's go Police Girl, don't forget to keep a look out.

Yes master!


An hour later one Seras Victoria was trying to calm our favourite Nosferatu Alucard. Sir Integra had placed Seras as a guest for her undercover role. Alucard on the other hand wasn't as lucky. He was to be a waiter for the dinner part of the ball. All waiters were to wear bunny suits, and his just had to be pink. At one stage he nearly broke his cover when he had to serve a drink to one Paladin Alexander Anderson. Luckily for Seras both men were undercover so they would have to save the childish fights for another night. Not that it had stopped Alucard from glaring daggers at Anderson all night. Poor Seras finally had enough and had dragged her unsuspecting master onto the dance floor.

Police Girl what on earth are you doing!

Be nice master, I'm trying not to blow your cover. You and Paladin Alexander Anderson look ready to jump down each others thoughts. So I'm keeping you occupied.

Well you shouldn't have told me what you were doing. Now if i choose to i can go back to keeping an eye on him.

No you won't master, i won't let you go just yet!

And how do plan on keeping me dancing Police Girl?

You'll just have to wait and see!

Or i could just read your mind.

That's cheating!

Seras pouted at her master. He grinned right back at her.

No one said i couldn't do it! But I'm enjoying your charade Police girl. It's actually entertaining me.

While this conversation was going on, the other dancers couldn't help but watch the two vampires dancing. The dancing was flawless and yet they never took their eyes off each other. It also seemed that they could understand each other without even talking.

When Seras made a trip to the bathroom to freshen up, Alucard decided to pay an old friend a visit. Cough, Anderson, cough! He walked up to the Iscariot member who was looking a bit foolish as he was completely covered in hundreds of hot cross buns.

"Are those edible or have you filled them with your horrible stench?" Asked Alucard sitting across from the Paladin.

"At least i didn't skin two hundred innocent little rabbits and put their fur in dye." Said Anderson Retorting back.

"Wouldn't you like to know what i did with the rest of the rabbits!" Said Alucard grinning evilly.

"You filthy vampire trash. How dare you come here. This is a in honour to Jesus Christ. Not for the likes of your unholy kind!" Said a pissed off and drunken Anderson.

Alucard suddenly had a very wicked idea. It involved Police Girl so he had to time it right.

"You know for a human, i realise how stupid you are and i understand why you are sitting here at the table all by yourself. You couldn't get a date. So i will wager you something. I want you to kiss the next woman to walk out of the bathroom. If she rejects you nicely, I'll give you my jackel. However, if she uses forceful means to get you away from her, you must yell out for everyone to hear you say... that you worship the devil!"

"YOU ABOMINATION TO GOD! YOUR ON VAMPIRE!" Swaggered Anderson.

Meanwhile Seras had finished applying her make up.

I hope master keep himself out of trouble while i was gone. Oh no what if his terrorising the waiters!

Seras hurriedly placed her make up back into her clutch and left the bathroom. The next thing she knew, someone grabbed her by the waist and kissed her on the lips. Seras eyes widened once she realized that it was Paladin Alexander Anderson. She could here her master laughing in the background. Seras couldn't believe it, the Paladin had invaded HER personal space. She balled a fist up and first kneed the unsuspecting paladin in the groin. Than she proceeded to punch every inch of him she could get her tiny hands on.

Well Police Girl i didn't know that Anderson liked you so much! I think you two will have lovely children together!

MASTER! YOU PLANNED THIS DIDN'T YOU! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT AND I HATE YOU!

My, my, my, such hostile feelings towards me. There's a empty room next door if you'd like to continue this elsewhere!

Your on!

A/N: Nothing bad happened, she just hit him once, twice. Okay about a dozen times, but whose counting! Oh and Alucard just sat grinning at her. Mentioning that he was glad he had Walter teach him how to use a digital camera. Lets just say it came in handy. And they both calmed down enough to go back into the ballroom. EVENTUALLY!


Three hours later even Seras was getting annoyed. About twenty men had asked her to dance, and the only time they listened to her was when her master came to rescue her. After number twenty Alucard stayed sitting at the table that Seras was at. She also noticed that too.

"Master why haven't you gone back to your table?" Asked Seras.

"Because it's such a bother going back to my table,when i know I'll be back over here soon enough." Said Alucard in a lazy tone.

"But master we're meant to be keeping a watch for these rogue vampires!" exclaimed Seras.

"Have you seen anyone who fits that description?" Asked Alucard.

"Well no..."

"Than just shut up, sit back and enjoy yourself for once." Said Alucard cutting off Seras.

She knew better than to argue with her master and was starting to relax and enjoy herself when it all went bad.

"I think i spoke too soon. Looks like we have some company." Said Alucard nodding to the main doors.


Alucard staggered through the main door of the Hellsing organisation. He was carrying Seras unconscious body in his arms. His pink bunny costume had also taken a bit of a beating and had red splashes of blood all over it. Seras was out like a light, she has lost too much blood. Even Alucard was willing to admit that it had been a fun night.

Flashback

Oh no what to do?

Relax Seras. You've killed vampires before. Time for a little fun!

Alucard slowly got up from the table and casually walked towards the door. The vampires watched him and started to laugh.

"Well look at the no dead king Alucard. Resorted to dressing in pink bunny costumes!" Said one to the others.

Alucard grinned menacingly.

"It's filthy trash like you who give the rest of us vampires a bad name." Said Alucard drawing his guns out from a little pouch on the stomach of his bunny costume.

Seras too had pulled a gun out of her bunny tail and was standing behind her master.

"Look at what we got here boys!" Said another whistling at Seras.

"Hey sweetie, leave pinkie here and I'll show you how a real man can be like!" Said the leader.

"My master is worth more than you garbage all put together!" Said Seras glaring at the rogue vampires.

Alucard gave her a fangy grin.

"Ready to start our mission Police Girl. Releasing restriction locks C...B until the target is silent." Said Alucard facing the reason why he put the stupid rabbit outfit on.

He left most of the five vampires for Seras to handle. He had some business to discuss with the leader.

It's just you and me now!" Said Alucard to the leader.

This is just great. Master is off having fun and I'm left with these four bozos!

Seras frowned as one of the rogue vampires walked up to her. She aimed her gun and fired at his heart. He immediately turned to dust. One came up from behind and another in front of her. Seras eyed both trying to figure out what to do. As she shot and silenced the one in front of her, the vampire behind her shot Seras through her shoulder. Seras than turned to silence him and while doing so received another shot to her body. This time to her stomach. Seras was struggling to finish off the last vampire. He had managed to use one of the silly humans who stayed in the Museum as a shield.

"Damn you coward! Hiding behind innocent people! Come and fight me like a man!" Yelled Seras in a desperate attempt to save the human.

Relax Police Girl I'll handle it!

With that said Alucard phased through the wall behind the vampire and plunged his hand through in one clean move. He than went back to finish his fight with the leader. Alucard laughed as he toyed with the leader until he became bored. He than proceeded to kill him with one quick, swift move.

"Target's have been silenced. Control locks back in place." Said Alucard as he turned to find Seras resting against a wall.

Come Police Girl, time to leave this place.

Too tired to walk master. Please help me.

Okay Police Girl just this once.

End Flashback


Walter and a bandaged Pip were sitting in the kitchen when Alucard still carrying Seras phased in.

"Master Alucard! What happened you Ms Victoria and your bunny costume?" Asked Walter.

"We had some fun with a bunch of rogue vampires. Police Girl got a little bloodied up and i think the bunny costume is uh beyond help." Said Alucard with a fangy grin.

"I ze zat you ave worn Seras out. I wish i could ave zat effect on er. Is she a screamer or a moaner?" Said Pip trying to bait both Alucard and Seras.

Alucard accidentally on purposely kicked the chair Pip was sitting on so it fell on top of the French man.

"I would like both mine and Police Girl's blood packs Walter." Said the Nosferatu calmly.

Walter placed the blood packs on top of Seras stomach. Alucard then phased through the wall with a wave of thanks to Walter and a glare at Pip.

Alucard phased into Seras room and placed the blood packs on her table before he placed her on her bed.

"Police Girl, wake up!" Said Alucard.

Seras stirred on her bed and mumbled something. He lent closer to listen.

"Yes I'm a natural blond. Pip stole my tutu." Was all that Alucard caught.

Alucard grinned and poked Seras in the ribs. She rolled towards him and swatted at his hand. Alucard had an evil glint in his eye as he lent real close to her face.

"POLICE GIRL!" Yelled Alucard in Seras ear.

Seras sat up so suddenly that she smacked her head on her master's.

"Ow! Oh I'm so sorry master!" Said Seras rubbing her head.

"Gee Police Girl is your head full of bricks. Here i was thinking it was full of hot air. Here drink up!" Said Alucard as he tossed her a blood pack.

Instead of drinking his own, Alucard proceeded to find the zip on the bunny costume. He finally turned to Seras having no luck in finding it.

"Police Girl, un-zip the rabbit costume." He said frustrated.

"But master, what are you wearing underneath?" Said Seras blushing.

"What i normally wear, besides my hat, coat and shoes. Why do you ask?" Said Alucard suspiciously.

"No reason at all master, now turn around!" Said Seras quickly.

Alucard was grinning as he did what Seras asked. She proceeded to un-zip him out of the now blood stained pink bunny costume. Once it was un-zipped Alucard removed the vial costume and true to his word was wearing his black shirt, vest and pants.

Only then did he sit at the table and started to drink his blood. He kept an eye on Seras watching her drink her blood from the corner of his eye. Once they were both finished Alucard stood up.

"Time for me to report to my master and give her the rabbit costume back!" Said Alucard happily.

"Okay master, i might see you i also have to give Sir Integra my report." Said Seras as she headed to the door.

"Are you going to change out of that outfit?" Asked Alucard.

Seras looked down at herself and than looked back at her master.

"Why do you think i should. I actually like what I'm wearing." She said and left her room.


"WHAT HAPPENED TO MY COSTUME!" Yelled Sir Integra at Alucard.

"Sorry master it was the rogue vampires fault." Said Alucard with a fangy grin.

Now i have to buy another to wear for my dare with Pip!

Oh there's no need for that master! I can lend you a costume right now.

Okay then, hurry up!

Police girl, come to my master's office now. Oh and change into your normal clothes and bring your costume with you.

Yes master.

Ten minutes later Seras entered Sir Integra's office. Her costume in a box.

"Is that the costume Victoria?" Asked an irritated Sir Integra.

"Yes Sir!" Said Seras handing the box to her master's master.

Integra stood up and went into the bathroom that joined onto her office.

"Alucard is this some kind of a joke!" Said a pissed of Hellsing.

"No master. You needed a costume and Seras had one." Said an amused Alucard.

Just than there was a knock to the door and Pip entered with a digital camera.

"Zir Integra, it is time for ze photo!" Said Pip looking for his boss.

Integra Wingates Hellsing had never been so humiliated in her life. She sat on her desk posing for Pip while Alucard and Seras were laughing by the door.

Be grateful that it isn't the pink bunny costume master!

Oh i am Alucard. That's why i had Walter take a picture of you and Victoria all dressed up!

My, my don't we play dirty!

I win this time Alucard!

I will get you back master, i always do.


However the following night it was Alucard who was fuming. Seemed that his master had posted up pictures of him and Police Girl all over the Hellsing Organisation.

"Uh master? Are you ok?" Asked Seras cautiously.

"See for yourself!" Said an angry Alucard pointing to the wall.

Sure enough Seras saw the picture of herself and her master. Just then some troupes walked by. A few of them whistled at Seras. One stupid mad told Alucard that it was very manly of him to wear pink.

"Oh but you see...I'm no man!" Said Alucard baring his fangs as he cornered the silly fool.


THE END

A/N: The guy went to hospital, located in intensive care.