(covering a missing part, or rather something that popped into my head after chapter 2. Also, new chap will be up on Sunday. Got caught up in watching .hack/sign and had to see the end. More moving than I thought it'd be.)
Dum-Dum walked into Nick Fury's office.
"Yes?" Nick asked as he continued to look over a set of e-mails sent to him by several annoyed backers of the Bio-Pulse device.
"We have a problem."
"Which one?" Nick groaned. "Please let it be an old one."
"It's a new one."
"You don't listen to me well do you?" Nick sighed and put away the electronic pad. "What is it?"
"The experimental Sentinel facility called for help."
"They called us?"
"Yes. Someone has hacked into their whole facility… and now the Sentinels are doing the tango?"
Nick blinked. "Dum-Dum."
"Yes?"
"Get the camera. And then get me some beer. The Misfits have rubbed off on me."
When they appeared on site using the Mass Transport Device Trinity had made for Shield, Nick and Dum-Dum just stood and stared.
One of the technicians ran up. "You have to help!"
Nick shrugged. "With what? We were told we could step in and assess as well as offer advice. This is your baby."
Then he and Dum-Dum started to take pictures of everything including the hyperventilating technician.
"You were right boss."
"About what?"
"This is educational. What it's teaching I have no idea."
Around them several Sentinels were dancing the tango in multi-colored sundresses and had glued paper mache roses to their mouths.
Two people ran by covered in ink. "The copiers are revolting the copiers are revolting!"
"This is your manager speaking." A voice was heard over the intercom. "Will the person who ordered 500,000 plastic garden gnomes please come to my office and cancel the order? I don't know the password you used."
"Nick?"
"Yes Dum-Dum?"
Fury turned to where he was pointing and just stared.
Several sentinels were chasing each other around with various pieces of machinery. In the background, a jukebox was playing the Benny Hill theme song.
"Since when do they put a jukebox on a conveyor belt?"
"Maybe they spent too much money elsewhere?"
"Not the caviar!" A janitor yelled as he tackled a run-away vending machine that was leaving a trail of caviar behind it as it hobbled away, with him still yelling on top of it.
"Yep, that would explain it."
Nick stared as the robots stopped in their tracks. They were starting to spark and several missiles were coming out of their compartments.
Nick smiled serenely and slapped the catatonic technician on the back. "Well. I can see everything is in order here. I'll just go back to headquarters and do my job."
Then they both transported out leaving the technician in tears.
The missiles started firing.
People started running.
"Help! Help!"
"Not the Espresso machine! Anything but that!"
"Ok… how did the men's restroom blast off like a rocket?"
"It's ok! The missile hit Frankie the Slacker. Oh wait. He's still alive."
"Sir, Sir."
"I'm not being paid enough for this!" The manager yelled. "I'm going to work at a nursery!" Then a missile hit his desk and blew him screaming out a window.
His secretary walked up to it and held up a pair of smoking pants. "Sir, you forgot your clothes!"
A police car was driving down a secluded road near the hidden facility. Then they slammed on the breaks and stared in shock at a half-naked man with his rear on fire ran past them.
"Whose turn is it to call it in this time?"
"I guess I will. You handled the drunken idiot who thought the espresso machine was his girlfriend."
"You just had to remind me of that mental image didn't you?"
Duke rubbed his forehead as the group transported out. Then he blinked and turned toward the intercom.
"Ok." Then he clicked the intercom button. "Dial-Tone!"
"What?"
"Where is Shane Shooter?"
"Out with our forces? I thought you knew."
"What!"
"You said, and I quote, You can blow something up just not here."
"Oh. Now I remember." Duke groaned then started banging his head against the wall.
Elsewhere Cobra commander was chasing Mindbender around while trying to shoot him.
"But Cobra Commander! I sent you where you wanted them!"
"Ok Stop. This is pointless." Cobra Commander groaned.
Mindbender leaned against a wall and panted. "I agree."
Cobra Commander nodded and started counting on his fingers. "Let me get this straight. One, you sent it to the F.O.H. Right?"
"As you commanded."
"And two, you sent nuclear powered clippers right?"
"Toenail clippers."
Cobra Commander nodded. "Ok. What I can't figure out is this."
"Yes?"
"Who the heck knew that F.O.H. also stood for Federal Occupational Health!"
"Um…"
"Yes idiot. I was referring to another organization. You know, the one that attacked our warehouse in Jersey." Cobra Commander sighed. "I don't know why they'd think it had mutants in it."
"I thought we determined the Misfit Arcade was at fault?"
"We did?"
Mindbender blinked. "You said it had to be him."
"Oh right. I was a little angry about something else at the time."
Mindbender nodded.
"Now where was I. Oh yes." Then he ticked off another finger. "Number 2."
Then Cobra Commander grabbed Mindbender by the collar, picked him up, and slammed him into a desk. "I said Clippers, Clippers!"
"I know, I know."
"It's a type of ocean going vessel! You Moron!"
Meanwhile, at the Federal Occupational Health meeting.
"Well, you must admit, this is a twist." Lady Jaye grinned. "Not one of your usual cobra plots."
"I can't understand it." Mainframe said.
"What is it?" Flint asked.
"It says Nuclear powered, right?"
"Yes. That's what the plans you hacked into said."
Mainframe scratched his head. "That's the name of a cleaning chemical."
"That would explain the slippery floors…"
Several members of the F.O.H and Cobra alike ran by screaming with toenail clippers gripping various parts.
Flint twitched. "That had to hurt."
Shane leaned up against a wall. "Man… and I didn't even get to blow things up this time."
"Careful Jean." Xavier said as he was slowly lifted out of the plane. "I said careful!"
CLANK
"Professor?"
"Logan?" Charles groaned while holding his head. "Is there any beer left?"
"Ask the little birdie." Logan snarled from inside. He was trying to remove a cooing Warren from the remains of several cushions.
Charles sighed. "Just leave him. We already know the plane won't explode. And he'll get over his nesting instinct in a couple days."
"You're kidding right? Do you remember how long it took me to clean up his mess last time? You'd think that he would've retained the intelligence to use a toilet…"
"Too much information." Jean said as Logan climbed out.
He paused in thought. "You have to admit that him dropping bottles instead of the usual on top of people was an improvement."
"Storm?" Jean groaned.
"There's a bottle in my room… I'll join you."
"Ororo?" Xavier asked.
"Get your own!" They both yelled and walked out of the hanger.
"Well Ollie." Logan groaned. "This is another fine mess you've gotten us into."
"Oh shut up and roll me toward your stash." Charles snarled. "I'll replace it later."
They ignored the strange rustling sounds coming from inside the jet and continued out of the hangar.
"Charles?" Storm asked as she stumbled back in.
"Now what?"
"Is it too late to help Warren with his nest?"
Then both Xavier and Logan heard the explosions and insane laughter.
Xavier sighed. "I knew it was too good to last. Storm, we have a problem."
"You think?"
Then they all stared at two robots that appeared out of an elevator.
"This is all your fault!" The golden form yelled as it chased around a familiar squat and round robot.
"Forge?"
Storm groaned. "Forge. But I didn't think he had activated them yet…"
"Oh?"
"He said they had kinks in them."
Then they blinked as various weapons popped out of R2D2 and C3PO and the two started shooting at each other.
Storm zapped them quickly.
Xavier blinked. "Has Forge even seen the whole series?"
"No. But he did listen to Jamie."
"Ah, that would explain it."
Then all three left the room to see what else was happening.
