Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach.
Spoilers: SS arc, and the arc after that. (Manga)
Warnings: Mmmm... nothing much, actually. It gets a little more "traditional" from here out though.
Aloha, Kenpachi!
PART II
Chapter 6: Bribery
"I sent two of my best men…" Kenpachi started out. "To earth, and you're telling me I've got to train more of them?"
"They've been mostly trained. They're in their last year at the school." Unohana said calmly. Inwardly she agreed with him. Training students was not what they needed to be doing. Not when the war had started. "We're going to be sending as many of our people to the living world as possible. And we need more. The school can only teach them so much, Kenpachi."
"They won't last a day with my team."
"They have to." Unohana said. "If they don't, then we'll get less and less ready students under our charge. I do not wish to teach beginner students how to heal when I am working."
"…" He twitched, and his reiatsu rose. But Unohana stayed perfectly calm. "Dammit, woman, I've got more important things on my mind than beating sense into some new recruit!"
"Exactly." She said. "That is why you will train them with patience and care. We need fighters, Kenpachi. And you know how to fight."
Kenpachi stood and headed for the door, slamming it shut before turning on her again. Yachiru was sitting quietly in the corner for once, a slight frown on her usually smiling face. She knew what it meant to be in a war, and no matter how childish she might act, this was her responsibility as well.
"I still don't know the name of my zenpaku-to. How the hell am I going to figure it out and become stronger when I'm wiping noses of snot-faced brats?" He demanded. "Send them to someone else."
"Kenpachi… you've said it yourself. Two of your strongest fighters are in the living world. Your division is weakened. You need the new members. Our entire system is confused right now, with the loss of three captains and the forty six…" She sighed but went on, not willing to show her weakness. "You must take responsibility, Kenpachi. That's why I'm asking you, personally, as a friend. Please."
He stared at her for a moment. "Dammit!" He cursed, his fingers tightening on the hilt of his ragged zenpaku-to. "Why the hell did they have to send you?"
"Because Ken chan actually listens to Unohana san." Yachiru said. Kenpachi twitched and looked at her. "It's okay, Ken chan. We can take on new playmates."
"…" He twitched then shrugged. "Fine. We'll take them."
"Thank you Kenpachi san." Unohana said with a small smile.
"Don't use that damn 'san' word." He muttered. "And I don't want any females, got it? Last thing I want is for someone to yell at me because I roughed up a little girl."
"I'm a girl!" Yachiru protested.
"You're different." He said. "You're Yachiru."
"Oh! Okay!"
Unohana nodded, not about to comment on that. "I'll see what I can do." Or have done. She was having enough trouble as it was. The only reason she was delivering this message and not one of the lower ranked shinigami is because she knew he would be angry. If he was angry at one of the subordinates he would hurt them, thus giving her more work in her already busy day. It was easier to do it herself.
That, and she hadn't seen him--them since the trip to Hawaii. She missed them, surprisingly enough. Kenpachi sat down on his red mat and leaned back, looking at her for a moment. "Want some tea?" He asked roughly. The words seemed foreign coming from him.
"I would appreciate it." She said.
"Oye, Yumi—" He stopped mid-shout, wincing slightly before he looked over at Yachiru.
"I'll get it, Ken chan." Yachiru said. She missed feather brow and pachinko head. And she knew Ken chan did, as well. It was like part of the family was missing. She headed into the kitchen and got the tea together. There was a bench alongside the counter so she would be tall enough to reach everything. Well, new playmates would be good for them! More people for Ken chan to fight with!
"Your yearly checkup is coming up." Unohana said. "I'll expect to see you this weekend."
A flash of panic crossed his face for a second before he scowled. "I'm perfectly healthy."
"I realize that. But it's standard procedure." She replied.
"We're in the middle of a war, Unohana, last thing I need to deal with is 'Turn your head and cough.'" He protested.
"You're being quite childish, you realize."
"You're being annoying." He replied. His reiatsu rose and he glared at her once again.
"I'll have a checkup." Yachiru said cheerfully as she walked into the room with a tray of tea. "I get a sucker afterwards!"
"You give her suckers for her checkups?" Kenpachi asked.
"It's a reasonable way to get her to cooperate." She said.
"Why the hell haven't I been bribed?"
"You're a full grown man. I had thought you were mature enough not to need a bribe." Unohana said, already seeing how this would end.
"I want a bribe." He muttered. "If I'm going to sit through that damn thing, I better be getting something out of it."
"The assurance that you are healthy?" She offered.
"Already know that."
"Would you like a sucker as well?"
"I don't much like sweets."
"Ken chan wants a fight!" Yachiru said happily.
"Nah, not with her." He said. "I don't know what I want. But I'm going to get something out of this damn checkup, one way or another."
For some reason that comment made Unohana feel the strangest urge to blush. Was he thinking something… personal? No, of course not. Kenpachi was fully focused on his fighting. It was almost astonishing how devoted he was to it. In fact, in the ten or more years he had been a captain, not once had she heard of him having relations with a female… or a male. And she heard about all relationships sooner or later.
She jerked ever so imperceptibly as she caught him looking at her strangely. "Of course, I shouldn't be surprised." She said calmly as she sipped her tea. "Although bribing your adult patients might be in bad taste…"
"Never said I cared about how tasteful things were." He replied. "Tasty, on the other hand, is important."
"Ken chan wants candy!" Yachiru said.
"Che, brat. Don't go putting words in my mouth."
"Dinner, perhaps?" Unohana offered. He did seem to enjoy eating. It made sense with the considerable amount of reiatsu he let off.
"Mmm… yeah, I could go for that." He agreed.
"I'll come too!" Yachiru said cheerfully.
"Then it's agreed. You'll both have your checkups this weekend and then we'll go out for dinner. My treat." Really, why was she agreeing to this? Usually she would either force him to go to his checkup or say forget it. She wouldn't heal people that didn't want to be healed, she wouldn't do a checkup on a person that didn't want a checkup. It was quite simple.
It didn't help that she was looking forward to it.
"Saturday work?" He asked reluctantly.
"Of course. I plan on being at the poker game Friday, as well." She replied before she got to her feet and headed for the door.
"Poker?" Yachiru asked. "I wanna play!"
Unohana closed the door before she could hear Kenpachi's response to either comment. A tiny smile hinted at her lips as she walked calmly out 11th district building.
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