Disclaimer: Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's not mine. No really, it's not. I'm highly complimented that someone would think so, but, I swear, none of it is mine. I just like to take these characters out to play from time to time.

Timeline: This ficlet is set during "Band Candy." Jenny never died because Buffy did her duty and staked Angelus back at the mall after blowing up The Judge. Jenny and Giles are living together. Buffy does not stop in at Giles' flat to discuss her sneaking around. Assume all else is to canon timeline-wise.

Chocolate Kisses

Rupert Giles was high. Or drunk. Or something. He really wasn't sure. Then again, he really didn't care.

He took another mouthful of chocolate and washed it down with a swig of scotch, staring moodily up at the ceiling. The flat was quiet. Jenny, stupid bint, had insisted on going to work even when Giles did everything in his power to keep her home. Including ambushing her in the shower and shagging her senseless.

What could you expect from a girl who didn't like chocolate? he thought to himself.

There was a tentative knock on the door and he slowly turned his head.

"Whosit?" he bellowed.

"It's Joyce Summers."

Ripper thought about it. Really didn't feel like a heart-to-heart with Buffy's mum right now. But she did have a fine pair of knockers. And nice legs. At the very least, he would get to admire the body that Buffy could only hope to have in 20-something years. Assuming she lived that long. He drank more scotch.

"It's open."

The door swung open and Joyce walked in. She was munching idly on a chocolate bar as she slammed the door behind her.

"Rupert?" she called.

Ripper raised his head from its comfortable position on the couch and glared at her. "Don't call me that. Call me Ripper."

She giggled. "'Kay."

Giggle was kinda cute, he thought. His eyes scanned her body, appreciative of the way her skirt clung to her hips.

"You're a good looking woman, Joyce," he told her. She settled on the floor near the stereo.

"Can't say you're all that hard on the eyes either, Ripper," she said in a breathy voice.

"Wanna listen to some records?" Ripper asked. He climbed off the couch and reached one long arm toward his albums, just barely not touching her. She had no such qualms and ran her hand along his arm.

"Strong," she said with another giggle.

He was leaning toward her for a kiss when the front door slammed open and closed.

"Rupert? Joyce? What's going on here?" Jenny Calendar demanded, hands on hips.

"Hi baby," Giles said, looking over his shoulder toward her, not moving away from Joyce.

Joyce wiggled her fingers in Jenny's direction, eyes still on Ripper.

"I asked what's going on," Jenny said again. Now her foot was tapping on the floor.

Ripper rolled his eyes. "We were just having some fun."

"You're drunk. At 10 o'clock in the morning?"

That called for another eye roll.

"Baby, take it easy, all right," he got up and strolled slowly over to her, running one hand up her bare arm and smiling down at her. "We're just listening to some music, having a few drinks. Nothing for you to worry about."

Jenny didn't look convinced, even when he lowered his mouth to hers. Joyce watched jealously as they kissed. Ripper tangled his hands in Jenny's hair, kissing her deeply. Despite herself, she pressed against him and moaned. Then she broke away.

"Are you sure you want to do this with her here?" she hissed at him, pointing toward Joyce with her chin.

"Come sit down, relax," Ripper said. He led Jenny toward the couch. "I have something I think you'll like."

He handed her a chocolate bar.

"You know I don't like chocolate, Rupert," she said, sitting down uncertainly.

"Oh, but Jenny, you'll like that one. It tastes like caramel, not chocolate," Joyce said.

"Really? I like caramel." She unwrapped the bar and took a small bite. "Mmm. That is good."

An hour later the three were sprawled out on the couch and the floor, heads bouncing in time to the music blaring out of the stereo. Ripper was stroking Joyce's hair while his other hand moved between his scotch, his chocolate bars, and kneading Jenny's thigh.

Jenny looked up at him, then at Joyce. She smirked. "You know Joyce, I think I have a top that would fit you. It doesn't fit me. You want to come upstairs and try it on?"

Joyce jumped to her feet. "Ooh, really?" she squealed. It was obvious where Buffy had inherited her clothes fixation from.

Ripper rolled his eyes again as the two girls headed up the stairs to the bedroom, both of them swaying slightly.

"Stupid bints and their stupid clothes," he muttered to himself.

A low moan came down the stairs and his neck snapped around toward the staircase. The moan was followed by a giggle, then a sharply indrawn breath. And another moan. He stood up.

"Ripper, I think Jenny and I need some help," Joyce's breathy voice called down the stairs. "Could you come here?"

Whipping off his shirt along the way, he was up the stairs so fast, he couldn't have gotten there faster than if he had teleported. Grinning widely at the two half-naked women kissing in his bedroom, he closed the door behind him.

Joyce giggled.

FIN