Chapter Twenty-Five: To Die Alone
The sun fell lower in the sky, but for three figures lost in the foothills of the Mountains of Wrath, the onset of night was barely noticeable. Skidding down the mountain with several dozen lesser beasts nipping at their heels, they raced on, trying to make the best time they could. They had already been in this horrible world for three days now, and it was beginning to grate the last nerves of the two human travelers.
Darting left, breaking away from the group, the three-eyed demon Hiei whisked too fast for the two humans' eyes to register, bounding to the top of a thirty foot boulder and resting his right hand on the hilt of his sword. He could see the numbers of the beasts that chased them, and could make out their shape with ease. Quadripedal demons, with blue, rubbery skin reminiscent of the dolphins of the human world. Their legs ended in sharp, vicious spiked claws that gripped the dirt beneath their feet, but Hiei knew better than to assume those were their weapons. Nay, that honor belonged to their tails, arcing up over their bodies and tipped with a spike that oozed their venom. Goroma demons, harmless alone but deadly in packs.
There were at least thirty, but Hiei knew better than to worry. He could take these lesser fools with ease. All he needed was his sword, and he should be able to move fast enough that their tails would never come into question. Tensing to move, he–
"SHOTGUN!" Yusuke Urameshi had ceased to run, now that the creatures were grouped together. Channeling his spirit energy into his fist and bracing it by pressing his upper arm into his side and holding it down with his left hand, he fired off a barrage of spirit blasts, hundreds of weaker incarnations of his Spirit Gun from his glowing, blue fist. The bolts went everywhere, completely without aim but firing in such massive quantities that aim became a trivial matter.
As Hiei watched, the beasts were blown apart, one after another forced back into the group by the sheer number of shots Yusuke was firing. Heads smashed from bodies that were blown through by the force of the shots gave way for the shotgun blasts to strike at the ones in the back. It lasted only ten seconds, but in the aftermath of Yusuke's attack, only three were left standing, and then only by sheer fortune.
A rather efficient tactic, Hiei noted. Rather than firing a concentrated Spirit Gun, he instead spread it to a wider range and a larger number of shots. Against a foe such as Toguro or, more importantly, himself, it would prove entirely useless. But for groups of weaker adversaries, it was an effective technique for thinning the herd.
The three surviving Goromas limped back towards their den, battered and broken from the assault. Hiei knew they would not be returning. It was time to turn his focus towards more important matters. "Kuwabara? Did I not explicitly tell you not to touch anything?" With the horde gone, all that remained was sheer agitation.
"It was just a BERRY! What was I supposed to think would happen!" The Goroma demons, Hiei knew, often used vegitation to attract idiots. Traps consisted of a few berries, leaves, sometimes even an entire tree to lure in prey. When one took the bait, a loud shriek would go off to bring in every Goroma within two hundred yards.
Hiei sighed, his two . What had he done to be saddled with such an idiot? "Allow me to put this as clearly as I can. Everything here wants to kill you, and if you insist on making an inconvenience of yourself, I will leave you to the next batch of hounds and finish this on my own. There is no time to deal with every little problem your worthless hide can get after us."
"What'd you say, shorty!" Kuwabara raised his fist, shaking it ever so slightly at Hiei. "You wanna fight? Come on, we'll settle this right here!"
Hiei merely scoffed, resuming his walk down the mountain. He stopped for only a moment, throwing his gaze back at Yusuke, who was busily struggling with Kuwabara to keep him from picking a fight that Yusuke knew would kill him. "Detective? We are near the base of the mountain. I expect to see you there in one hour, with or without the fool. Otherwise I will leave the both of you behind, and let you deal with the Forest of Lost Souls yourselves." With those words, Hiei vanished in a flash of speed, whisking down the mountain on his own. He needed to get away from Kuwabara for a while; he was already fighting back a desire to murder him in his sleep.
Yusuke, still holding back Kuwabara, only sighed. This trip was wearing on all of them, and he could tell Hiei was serious about abandoning them. This was Hiei's home world; he didn't need Botan to tell him that Hiei would consider staying, and leaving them to figure things out for themselves. "Some guide he's turning out to be."
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Darkness. Everywhere darkness. The world lay in a faint distance, far away from her. So stupid. She had been deceived...no, she had allowed herself to be deceived, and now she was dying for it. She had just wanted...she had wanted so badly for him to be real. So badly to see him again. She had missed, had intentionally bypassed every sign, every action, every moment where it wasn't him, for the sake of preserving her hope that she had him back in her life.
Sakyo...why did he have to go? Why couldn't he see that she needed a man like him in her life. Why couldn't she have at least one thing good...why did everything nice that happened to her always turn into another way to cause her more pain? She was cursed...she had to be. Sakyo passing into her life twice now, only to be torn away in the most brutal way he could. Her parents...
"Why did you go..." If she could cry, she would. She felt more alone now than she ever had before. Here in this dark, empty void, she would die the way she always knew she would. Alone, without anyone she loved. Sakyo had been a lie, she knew this now. He had been nothing more than a means of using her, to achieve some horrible goal. Keiko...she didn't know what happened to Keiko. What if she was out there somewhere, dying in a horrible black void of her own? All because of her...
"...Kazuma..." Her brother was now in god knows where. Off to some nasty demon world, to get torn to shreds by one of the horrible monstrosities she had seen at the Dark Tournament. Probably laying in a ditch right now, bleeding to death because he was too stupid to fight back. She should never have let him go...she should have fought harder, that's what she should have done. She should have...
"Okay, geez, stop nagging at me!" She could hear his voice now. His defiant, angry voice. She had always tried too hard, she realized. She had forced him away, and she wasn't even certain why.
"Why are you always getting on my case about this!" She didn't know why. She just...she didn't want to lose him. Why couldn't he see? Why was he so stupid that he couldn't see? Was he...no, it wasn't his fault. She knew, deep down, it had never been his fault. He wasn't stupid...she had pushed him away.
She wanted him to see. She wanted so badly for him to know, but it was too late now. She'd been wrong before. She wouldn't be crying. There isn't a strong enough word for the tears she'd be pouring, as she lay dying in her void. She didn't want to die now. She didn't want to...not like this. Not alone. Her greatest terror had always been to die alone.
Would anyone even come to her funeral? When they buried her...would anyone even care she'd died? She had ostracized and alienated her brother...she had no friends to speak of. She...would she even get a funeral, she wondered? People had to care enough for her to be buried. Did she even have that?
No...she couldn't go now. She couldn't...please, not now. Not like this, please...she wanted so badly to live. She wanted to see her brother again...wanted to show him that she did care, that she loved him. She couldn't die before she at least got that chance. She couldn't...no, she had to live. Please, she pleaded to herself in the dark void, let her live, don't let her die, please.
She couldn't die. She couldn't. She...
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"Sir?" Botan stood before Koenma's desk, in the palace of Reikai. There was a pained expression on his face that frightened her; something big had just happened, something that she knew was not good. "You sent for me?"
Koenma was silent a moment, seated in his chair. In his toddler form, the stoic silence was all the more frightening for her. "Something has happened, Botan. I need you to go to Makai at once, and tell Yusuke. This is not good."
"Okay," Botan drew in a deep breath. "What do you want me to tell him? What's happened?"
Koenma turned his eyes up, looking straight at Botan. The serious manner of speaking was unlike him. It frightened her. "I've just gotten word from Kurama, in the human world. We have a traitor. One of my Reapers, Megumi, who temporarily took your place with Yusuke until I returned you to the team, has sided with Yoshi Tsarakino. With her help, they have captured Keiko, but Kurama could not say why. From Yoshi's words, it sounded completely unrelated to her relationship with Yusuke, so the obvious answer is out."
Botan was speechless. She had never liked Megumi, the woman was too stuck up for her tastes, but a traitor? This...Koenma was right, this WAS bad. Among other things, Reikai Grim Reapers were trained to open portals between the three worlds, so that they could bring spirits from the human world back into Reikai. Even without Yoshi's psychotic whims, that alone was dangerous if she was going into Makai. "Sir...are you sure she's betrayed us?"
Koenma nodded his head, sadly. "I'm afraid she has. I've tracked her movements, and she's opened a portal into Makai recently. Here, take this with you." He slid a small sheet of paper across the table to Botan. Upon looking at it, she found she could barely make it out. Numbers and letters and numerous strange symbols she had never seen before, symbols written in the demons' native language. "Give that to Hiei; he can figure it out. The bug Megumi's wearing spewed that out when I checked for her current location."
Botan turned her head up from the paper, confused. "A bug, sir? You knew she was going to turn on us?"
Koenma sighed. "Not hardly. I always figured she was too uptight and job-oriented to do something like this. No, I have bugs on all my Reapers. It helps me keep track of whether or not they're doing their jobs or not. I never hoped I'd have to use one like this."
Botan nodded her head, looking back down at the paper. She supposed that did make sense. He wouldn't be the first employer to–hey, wait a minute! Her face turned back up to Koenma, and he could see the anger beginning to burn. "Wait, I'M A REAPER! Do you have one of these things on ME!"
"Um..." Koenma was lost for a response. A wrong answer might get him castrated. "Of course not," he exclaimed quickly. "When you took the job as Yusuke's assistant, I didn't feel the need to keep it any longer." He was lying out his arse and he knew it, but it worked for the time being.
"Sure," Botan narrowed her eyes. She wasn't buying a word of it. She'd be certain, next time she showered, to scrub extra thoroughly and make sure it wasn't somewhere on her body. "Wait, what about Kurama? Why didn't he stop Megumi from taking Keiko? I mean, she's a Reaper. I'd think she wouldn't be too much of a challenge for a boy of his ability."
Koenma sighed. This was the part he had especially not been looking forward to. "Kurama didn't stop her because of Shizuru. She's...Tsarakino hurt her. He used her to force Kurama to waste time taking care of her, rather than pursuing them."
"...is she okay?" Worry pent up inside of Botan now. Shizuru was one of her human friends, one of few she had outside of Reikai. They'd been at the Dark Tournament together, with Keiko and Yukina, cheering for their boys. If Shizuru was hurt...she didn't know what she'd do.
Koenma sighed. "She's not doing well, Botan. Tsarakino jammed a knife into her right lung. That's not something you get up and walk away from. Kurama wouldn't talk much about it. I don't know much more than that. From what I've heard, she's dying."
Botan was struck without words. Her mind raced at what Koenma was saying, and she was terrified for her friend. "...no..." She felt herself starting to tear up, but she knew she couldn't cry. Not now. She had a job she had to do, but...it hurt. She had escorted Genkai to Reikai once before, when the younger Toguro brother killed her. That had been heart-wrenching, and Botan only knew Genkai through watching her train Yusuke and watching her fight at the Dark Tournament. Shizuru...Shizuru was a good friend to her. She couldn't bear to do that again, especially with someone so close. Not again.
Koenma knew from Botan's silence how she felt. He hadn't wanted to tell her, but she had to find out some time. "There is nothing we can do for her right now, Botan. It's all in Kurama's hands. You need to find Yusuke, and give that paper to him. He needs to know what's happening, before any more deaths are added to Tsarakino's crimes."
"...I...yes, sir..." She had to trust in Kurama now. She knew Koenma was right, but it was hard. She wanted to race back to the human world, wanted to find Shizuru and help her. But she had a job to do, and she knew it. She could only pray that, when she returned, Shizuru would not be there in Koenma's office awaiting an afterlife.
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"No, mother. I am just fine. I...yes, mother, I have eaten. Please, don't worry yourself over me. ...no, mother, I don't know when I'll be home. The school said it would be at least a week for this. ... I thought I told you, mother. It's a special trip, for the gifted students. Don't worry, I'll call and check in. ... Yes, mother. Yes...yes, mother. Okay. Thank you, mother. I'll talk to you later. I love you too. Good night."
That voice...she knew that voice. So familiar...where was that voice coming from? Was this death? Were there voices in death? Where...footsteps now. She could hear them...something was coming closer. Where was it? So dark. So quiet. So empty.
That voice...where had she heard that voice? Why...why did it sound so...wait...no, she knew that voice. It was coming back...she knew it. "...K...Ku...ra...ma..." And that was her voice. She had heard it...she knew she'd heard it. It had been hard, though. So hard, but...yes, she knew that voice.
"Shizuru?" There it was again. There was the voice.
"...Ku...ra...ma..." she strained again, her voice struggling to work, but it was working. She knew it was working, she got it. Pain...so much pain, but her voice was working. The harder she pushed, the more it hurt. But things were working. She felt a twitch...her finger had moved–no, she had moved it. She moved a finger. And she felt more pain, but...but she did it.
"...Kurama..." she spoke more fluidly, her words starting to take form. And then a cough, a horrible, throat-tearing cough that ripped up from her lungs. She could taste iron in her mouth, now. There was something there...some liquid that had come up from her lungs when she coughed. It was on her lips, on her chin...it tasted metallic.
She heard him speak again, heard his soft voice in her ears. "Careful. Don't push yourself too hard." She felt something beginning to press down on her hand, but she couldn't make it out. It felt fleshy, and it covered hers easily, gripping it ever so gently. "You're going to be okay. Just rest for now.
Straining, struggling, her eyelids slowly opened. The darkness went away, but in its place was a blur of color. "...where..." The blur was starting to take more form. A splotch of red...dashes of yellow and orange...all swirled together, but beginning to unswirl. She still couldn't see well enough to make anything out, but it was starting to get better.
"It's okay," Kurama spoke gently. "We're back in your apartment. You've been out for two days now. I told Koenma what happened yesterday, and I've been taking care of you since." She felt something soft beneath her, something gentle, and there was something on top of her. Her bed...her blanket...she was back home, back...back home.
Tears started to fill her eyes, but she didn't want to cry here. Not in front of him. Not like this. She had been so scared...so scared, but she didn't want him to see it. "...Kurama...why..." Why was he here? Why was he helping her?
"I am afraid I don't understand what you mean." His voice was so soft, so quiet. She still couldn't make anything out, not with her eyes, but she knew that blur of red was him. She let them close, let them fall shut as they were not doing her a thing of good. Maybe later, she'd try again. Her body hurt so badly...every time she breathed, it felt as though her chest was burning. Yes...yes, she would try again later. For now, she just needed to rest.
Why was Kurama here? She didn't say another word, just fell back into the quiet rest. She didn't know why he was here, but somehow, it made her feel better. She could feel the tears rolling down her face, but she found herself not caring anymore. She could cry here. Even if it was only Kurama, one of her brother's friends sitting her beside her, at least she wouldn't have to cry alone.
