AN: It is my duty to inform you that I in no way, shape, or form own the Teen Titans.

Chapter 3: Never to be Loved

A week later the two were finally fully functional again. Raven had to catch up on some much needed meditation and Beast Boy went straight to his beloved videogames. They didn't really talk all that much. But that was nothing new. But the strange thing was that Raven actually wanted to talk to Beast Boy. What a switch! Usually Beast Boy always wanted to talk to Raven about something. But lately he had been staying away from her, knowing that she probably didn't want to discuss their little forced kiss.

After dinner Beast Boy headed to his room to listen to some music. He continually stretched and thanked God that he could feel his extremities once more. He had just selected three CDs to pop into his stereo when he heard a soft knocking at his door. If it wasn't for his heightened hearing he may not have heard it. But he did and he went to his door.

"Hello?" he asked as he opened his door. He was quite surprised to see Raven standing on the other side.

"Hello Beast Boy," said Raven plainly, but with a little hint of hesitation.

"Oh, hi Raven," he said with an awkward grin. "What's up?"

"I wanted to talk to you about… something," she said shyly.

"What?" he asked curiously.

"About that… kiss we shared," said Raven.

Beast Boy felt his heart stop for a moment and a blush crept over his face. He quickly grabbed her and pulled her into his room. She was quite startled by this action and let out a gasp as he pulled her in. He closed his door and looked to the very confused Raven. "I… just don't want Cyborg walking in on us, that's all," he said scratching the back of his head nervously.

"You could have given me a little more notice," said Raven fixing her cloak that had nearly been twisted around her by his pull.

"Yeah, sorry," said Beast Boy. "So… what about the kiss did you want to talk about?"

"I just wanted to say… I'm sorry," she said looking to the floor for a moment, but then went back to her neutral state.

Beast Boy wasn't sure what she meant by this. "Huh? What are you sorry about?" he asked.

"Well, I'm sorry that I had to be your first kiss," she said plainly. "And I'm sorry that I was the kisser and you were the kissee. I'm sure Cyborg gave you a hard time on that."

"Yeah, he did actually," said Beast Boy with a soft chuckle. "But, you don't have to be sorry, Raven. It had to be done. Besides, if anyone should be saying sorry, it should be me."

"Why you?" asked Raven, raising an eyebrow.

"Well, you asked me to kiss you and… and I couldn't… do it," said Beast Boy.

"Beast Boy, I know that I'm the last person you would ever want to kiss, let alone have your first kiss with," said Raven plainly, but a little bit of sadness behind her voice. "You had a right to be hesitant. But, on a more positive note, at least you still have a chance to be the kisser and not the kissee. So you still have that to look forward to."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," he said with a smile of realization. "And you've still never been kissed. So you have that to look forward to."

Ravens face went completely dead. "No, I think that was my only kiss," she said in her monotone voice. "I doubt anyone will ever want to kiss me. Anyway, I just wanted to say I'm sorry and now we can stop being all awkward around each other." And with that she phased out of the room, leaving Beast Boy shocked at her quick exit.

She arrived in her room and sat down on her bed. She felt very low. She hated thinking about kissing and relationships and all things of that sort. She never thought she would feel anyone's lips on her own. As much as it sucked that it had to be Beast Boy's, she was grateful that it had actually happened. But it was bittersweet, since she knew she would never have another.

The tower was still and quiet as sleep set in to all of the Titans. The alarms were set and they were safe to rest their tired bodies. Robin never seemed to budge an inch in his sleep. He slept on his back and was ready to leap out of the bed at any moment. Starfire slept on her back as well, but with her head hanging off of the bed and her feet resting on her pillow. Cyborg rested on his recharging table and slept while he juiced up. Beast Boy was curled up on his top bunk with half of his pillow hugged in his arms like a loved teddy bear. Raven was the only one not resting as comfortably as her friends.

She had fallen asleep on her side, but as soon as she fell deeper into sleep she began to toss and turn. Horrible dreams plagued her nearly every night. This was nothing new. It was why she got up so early every morning, to get away from those dreams. If she could actually sleep peacefully she was certain she would sleep in until noon. But she would never have such luck.

They were always the same types of dreams; her father coming back from death and seeking revenge against her, her demon side getting loose and going on a killing spree, her friends deciding that they didn't want to be her friends anymore, people scorning her, pointing at her and calling her evil and a demon.

This dream was particularly upsetting to her, considering the conversation she had had with Beast Boy a few hours before. She was walking down the street and people all around her were snickering and giving her dirty looks. She was used to this, so she continued to walk. Why she was walking she did not know. Then she noticed something about all of the people around her. They were all holding hands. As she walked further down the street she saw that it was filled with nothing but couples. They were hugging each other and smiling happily. She looked down at the pavement, but her eyes had different plans and kept looking at the people, who all began to kiss their partners. She wanted to be out of there; to be away from all of that happiness and… love. She levitated into the air and flew away.

She saw the tower and flew to it. She touched down and punched in her access code. She was denied. She put it in again and pressed enter, but she was denied once more. Suddenly the intercom began to crackle with static.

"Who is it?" asked Cyborg's voice.

"It's Raven," she said. "My code won't work."

"Of course not!" he said plainly.

"Why isn't it working?" she asked.

"Because we're not letting you back in here," he said with a chuckle.

"Why? What did I do?" she asked, growing upset, which was something she never did. But she was in a dream, so it was allowed. At least, she couldn't control it.

"No one loves you, Raven," said Robins voice.

"We do not like your gloominess and grumpiness," said Starfire's voice.

"Not to mention the fact that you're a bad kisser!" laughed Beast Boy's voice.

Raven fell to her knees and began to cry. She put her face in her hands and wept. "I thought you were my friends," she said through her tears.

"Sorry, you're too worthless for our liking," said Robin.

Raven looked up and saw that the door leading to the tower had opened and now all four Titans were looking down at her.

"I'm not worthless," she said as the tears streamed down her cheeks.

"You'll never be liked," said Cyborg with a smirk.

"And you shall never be loved," said Starfire smiling, which reminded Raven of Blackfire.

"Face it Raven," said Beast Boy crouching down and looking deep into her eyes. "You're just a demon. And demons can't be loved." He pushed her and she fell onto her back. Beast Boy began to laugh maliciously, as well as the other three Titans. Raven looked up at the bright blue sky and began to cry again, their laughter ringing in her ears.

She gasped and sat up. She looked around her dark room, only illuminated by the light of the moon. She felt her cheeks and saw that they were covered with tears. A few of her books had been moved off of their rightful places on the shelves. She placed her shaking hand to her forehead and tried to calm down. She hated sleep.

There came a soft knock at her door, which made her jump. "Raven?" she heard a soft voice say through the door.

"Who is it?" she asked, fearful of who was on the other side.

"It's Beast Boy," he said. "Can I come in?"

"Why?" she quickly asked, wiping her now red and raw cheeks.

"I heard you crying and moaning," said Beast Boy.

"I'm fine," she said, trying to sound normal. "Go back to bed."

"But you sounded like you were having a nightmare," said Beast Boy. "Please, can I just come in to make sure you're okay?"

"I said I'm fine," she said, her voice slightly cracking, due to the fact that her body wasn't finished crying yet.

There was a slight pause from the other side of the door. She waited for him to talk, but heard nothing. 'Maybe he went back to bed,' she hoped. But this was not Ravens lucky night. As if she ever had a lucky anything. Beast Boy had crawled under the door as a beetle and transformed back to himself once he was in. Raven gasped and covered herself with her blanket.

"Get out of here!" she said firmly, a tear rolling down her cheek. 'Damn it!'

"Raven, you're crying!" he said alarmed and walked over to her.

"It's none of your concern," she said wiping the tear away and looking away from him. "What are you doing out of bed anyway?"

"I was just getting a midnight snack," said Beast Boy. "I've been really hungry because of my growing spurts."

"How wonderful," she said sarcastically. "Now please leave me alone. If you go now I won't tell Robin that you invaded my privacy."

"Raven, I'm just trying to help!" he said desperately. "You're my friend and you sounded like you were in trouble. And that's what friends do, they help each other. I mean, we are friends, right?"

Raven sighed and brought her knees up to her chest. "Yes, we're friends," she said tiredly. "And… I appreciate you're concern for my wellbeing. But I'm fine, so you don't have to worry. Good night." She lay back into her bed and turned so her back was facing him.

Beast Boy sighed and began to head out of her room. "Okay, but if you ever need someone to talk to, you can come to me. I mean, I know you would never go to me for advice or anything, but I just want you to know that my door is open. Not that I expect you to ever willingly come to my door. I'm sure you would always go to Robin first if you needed help, and then Cyborg, then Starfire, then anyone else before coming to me, but I can be a listener. I mean, I know it seems like I do nothing but talk, but…"

"Get out!" Raven hollered and covered her head with a pillow.

Beast Boy gave a small yelp and ran out of the room.