Disclaimers: Same as in Part 1. Except Narutard is created by Gender Outlaw (who reviewed! Wai)
Note: We have debated this time and time and time and time again. We have reached the conclusion that we are still going to have the author's notes in. Skip if you don't want to read them. These notes are important because they give clues to the bonus question for the omake. Also it is EXTREMELY important because this fic is very AU in that it is created around a specific town with specific attributes. Thus we didn't want to bore our readers with mundane details and descriptions. That is all. Thank you.
Previously on the last episode of 'Waimo':
- STOPPP! - yelled out the Angel Sasuke as he tried to get Sasuke to cease his starring and embarrass all three of them when the blond turned around.
Part 2 of 2:
Shaking his head to dispel the two imaginary figures on his shoulder, the Uchiha glared at the offending piece of orange shorts.
"Ah ha! I found it!" cried the blond as he whipped his licence from out of his back pocket, turned around to sit back on his seat and handed said licence to a glaring Sasuke.
Damn! I thought that would work! Argh! Now what am I going to do? Iruka's going to have my head for this!
Grounding his teeth in irritation, Sasuke hastily took the offered licence and swiftly noted down all the details. Ripping the paper off with a flourish, the raven-haired officer handed the ticket and licence to the blond.
Naruto stared at the ticked. He blinked once, looked at the paper again and blinked twice. Maybe he was seeing things. Surely it didn't say $120 for speeding and $250 for . . . . . indecent exposure!
"WHAT!" Naruto exploded, all thoughts of trying to sex himself up vanished out the window. Instead, the thought of beating the living daylights out of the rookie cop seemed more enticing.
"What are you! NUTS! Indecent exposure?"
Sasuke was taken aback from the previously quiet blond. In fact he was a little shocked, even though it didn't show on his face except for his eyes widening only a fraction. So far, all those he'd meet had tried to butter him up or weasel themselves out of receiving the ticket even after the ticket was issued. Yet this boy...
The Uchiha quirked an eyebrow, the blond was definitely interesting.
"You look like a whore." He smirked as he made the snide comment.
A fuse just broke above the blond's forehead, he was officially now pissed. He angrily threw open his door in which Sasuke sidestepped easily.
"You fucking bastard! Good for nothing mother-fucktard of a..." Streams of Naruto's very own unique curses flew out of his mouth at the stoic young man. Pulling up his fist in an attack, he launched himself at the smirking young officer.
Before the blond could reach him, Sasuke had dodged the incoming blow and effectively handcuffed the shorter youth against the old truck. He'd had numerous experiences like this so it was simple to capture the furious blond. That and Naruto was clumsy at throwing his punches.
"You have the right to remain silent, anything you say or do will be used against you." Sasuke monotonously recited the standard words.
Shocked and speechless at what just occurred, Naruto just gapped at the cop. He was brought out of his stupor when Sasuke manhandled him to the police car.
Did he just touch my BUTT!
"Help!" Naruto hollered as he realised Sasuke (damn cops were all perverts!) was molesting him!
"Help! Rape! Police!"
"I am the police." Sasuke said flatly.
". . . . . . KAKASHI!"
#1800-OMG-I-SPOT-A-NARUTARD-AND-I-NEED-HELP-NOW#
Somewhere on a farm...an unsuspecting grey haired man sneezed.
"Ahhh-chooo!"
"Oh, have you caught the flu Constable Hatake?" enquired a pony-tailed man with a unique scar across his nose.
"Ahh, of course not. You can call me Kakashi, I'm not working you know." grinned Kakashi.
"Oh, ok Kakashi." The brunette replied sheepishly. Brown eyes then looked out the window in worry.
"Do you think something happened to Naruto? Usually he'd be here right about now, especially since I'm cooking his favourite dish."
"Nope. If anything happens, lil' Sasuke would fix the problem - he's on duty now."
"Sasuke?"
"The new bloke from the city." explained the silver-haired man.
"I see. . . . ." pondered Iruka.
"No need to worry, if anything happens that kid will fix it up. He came highly recommended from his previous station. Naruto will be in good hands."
"Alright then. Would you like to stay for dinner then Kakashi?"
"Why I thought you'd never ask." replied the grinning man.
#1800-OMG-I-SPOT-A-NARUTARD-AND-I-NEED-HELP-NOW#
Naruto was sulking - wait lets rephrase that sentence coz Naruto doesn't do sulking.
He was angry-but-he-wasn't-going-to-let-that-bastard-see-he-was-angry-so-that-that-bad-egg-would-gloat.
He still hadn't been able to convince the guy to let him off the hook. Everything in his books hadn't been able to deter the guy (was he even human!)
From getting to know the guy:
"So I heard you moved down here from the Christchurch?"
(A/Ns: Christchurch is a big flat city. No hills.)
"Hn."
"Must have been a few long hours drive eh?"
". . . . "
To flattering him:
"You know you have really nice hair, and your eyes – wow! I've never seen such a colour on anybody!"
"They're black."
". . . .Oh."
To the blond's last resort of threatening/blackmailing/peer pressuring the now dubbed cold-ice-bitch-from-Antarctica:
"If you don't let me go right this minute I'll tell Kakashi that you tried to rape me! You'll lose your job, your reputation! No one will ever like you. Everyone will hate you and they won't even give you free noodles! So whaddya say? Let me go and I'll forget alllllll bout it?"
"No."
Heck! Even offering him females didn't work:
"There's this really hot chick I know...you want a date with her? She's really awesome! I can give you her phone number if you let me go. . ." Of course not that he'd tell him that he didn't know any, he'll just give him some random number.
". . . ."
Naruto even went as far as to do his sob story:
". . .and then my dad ran after my mum and they both fell down the cliff together. They were like huuuuu-splat! Since then I've never known a parent's love. Iruka was the only one who took me in. He was so kind enough to raise me even though he was poor himself. I sold my noodle cups so that it could pay at least some of the rent. Sometimes I even went without supper so that we had some money."
"Get a job."
It was utterly pointless. The guy was cruel!
Just then the yellow brick building came into view; it loomed over the blond like a death sentence. It was the police station...which was situated directly opposite the local pub as odd as it may seem. Luckily for Naruto, the pub was quiet on this fine Wednesday afternoon. Everyone had already gone home and the place was like a ghost town (except for the dairy and fish 'n' chip that was still opened).
Sasuke drove the car into the parking lot behind the yellow building. He parked the car then got out of his seat. Taking Naruto by his cuffed hands, the Uchiha dragged the blond towards the back entrance. As they entered the building through a light-blue corridor into the foyer, Sasuke was stopped by one of his colleagues. Someone whom he'd rather not see, not see period actually.
It was Neji.
#1800-OMG-I-SPOT-A-NARUTARD-AND-I-NEED-HELP-NOW#
Neji was finishing up some minor paperwork before heading off home to his wife, Hinata. Yup married life was a bliss. He had a good loving wife to go home to. It looked like fate was smiling upon him.
Looking his office door behind him, Neji strode out of the winding corridor into the foyer which he expected to see no one there.
To his surprise he found it was that kid and . . . . was that Naruto!
His blank orbs took in Naruto's rumpled state; messy blond hair, one shoulder singlet strap slipped down, a flushed face, shorts riding low and to top it off, one side of his orange shorts was riding higher than the other.
The older officer turned to stare at the Uchiha's annoyed scowl and raised his eyebrow in questioning.
#1800-OMG-I-SPOT-A-NARUTARD-AND-I-NEED-HELP-NOW#
Naruto's eyes light up as he caught sight of Neji - he'll help for sure!
"Neji help me! Sasuke's trying to rape me!" the blond cried out pitifully.
"Okay." came the bland reply and said person grabbed Naruto from the Uchiha.
"I'll rape you."
And that was...the end.
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Everyone goes "WHAAAAT!" and falls down anime style.
Bob: This is Bob, your game show host for "Spot That Town!" For today's show, we have TWO contestants.
And now, on the left hand side we have Trekiael from adultfan. While on the right hand side we have TwlightDreamz from fanfiction.
So, lets have your answer first Trekiael. From which town is 'Waimo' based on?
Trekiael: I don't know, I think somewhere sunny, green, quiet but not to much, with not too many people, well something acquaint to Konoha but in a modern and no-ninja way, maybe in California?
Bob: Okay...so lets now go to TwlightDreamz. What do you think?
TwilightDreamz: Kind of sounds like Rhode Island to me. I had a teacher who lived there for practically all her life and that's almost exactly how she described it.
Bob: And now you have it. Trekiael thinks it's from California and TwlightDreamz thinks it's from Rhode Island. Who will win tonight's prize? Who will have the omake chapter dedicated to them? Will it be Trekiael or TwlightDreamz? Let's find out right after this break.
#1800-OMG-I-SPOT-A-NARUTARD-AND-I-NEED-HELP-NOW#
exrxr: yes, sorry to burst your bubble but this IS a two chapter fic. It was originally a one-shot but it got too...ah...adult-ey for fanfiction. Thus, you can find it someplace else...like slashfanficition or adultfan.
Einld: mmmmuuuwhhhaahahahahaha...cough...that was not my idea for the ending...such a crappy ending eh? Man am I so gonna get overflamed for this...oh woe is me.
