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Happy New Year!

Chapter Eleven

Heroes

As the helicopter hovered high above the late night city lights, from the empty streets to the quaint simplicity of country life, she thought hard about everything, about every second that she was going to remember about this particularly short episode in her long existence.

What she initially thought would be solely a mission to save the world, was in fact a mission to teach her about life.

She came to this world armed only with her strength and the truth of her message, devoid and detached of any other unnecessary emotion. But it never once grazed her mind that, in the shortest of times, her cold and unfeeling demeanor would be melted by the warmth and caring of a simple family. And now, however she wanted to isolate herself from the different sentiments as she was taught to do so before she stepped outside the boundaries of her home, she could not will her mind, more importantly her heart, to do so as easily anymore. Because she learned in such a fleeting time that there was so much more to feel that what she knew.

For the shortest of times, she became a part of a loving family, a daughter that they never had, a slightly annoying sister and a best friend, and most of all, a loved one.

It felt unfair to her mother and sisters, but it felt like all the years she lived in paradise would never compare to the life she had for two days in this strange land.

She traced the fingers of her right hand softly against her lips and closed her eyes, trying to relive the moment when Bruce kissed her, the first time she was ever kissed, because that moment would never happen again.

He loved her.

But what about the curse?

There would never be a curse because in a few more hours, he would have forgotten her.

She felt a slight and sudden jolt before becoming aware that the helicopter just touched down the Kent farm. With a smile and a polite thank you to the pilot after assisting her, she walked back to the house in the dark by her lonesome, her footsteps becoming heavier with every step. With a sad heart, she lifted her gaze and looked at the warm and cozy house, outlined by the friendly light of the moon in the night.

Jonathan and Martha's bedroom lights were off and that meant they were already asleep because it was, after all, very late. And it made her feel guilty that she was not able to keep track of the time while she was with Bruce. When she brought her gaze down, she could see Clark waiting, sitting patiently by the patio. Immediately, she tried to mask all of the sadness. Looking at his face, it appeared that he was trying to hide an amount of melancholy himself.

Exchanging a quick greeting that felt awkward, she excused herself to climb upstairs to his room where she took off the evening dress and changed into her own white toga and sandals, in the same way she arrived. Neatly arranging the borrowed dress on the bed, she took one last and long look at the quiet bedroom where a few but very cherished moments happened, trying to imprint the images in her memory just like the pictures she had seen.

Walking out of the room and closing the door softly behind her, she walked soundlessly on the short hallway, her footsteps leading her to the direction of the master bedroom. Stopping to pause by the door, she stood there for a while in a moment of regret, thinking that she would not be able to embrace them one last time and say her farewell. She touched a hand to the hard wood and closed her eyes, keeping the thoughts of the father and the mother that she had for two days. After saying a quiet thank you, she walked away.

It was a heartbreaking thought that Jonathan and Martha would have no memory of her. But she would treasure all the time she had spent with them for the rest of her long life.

After climbing down the stairs she took careful steps to the kitchen then to the living room, once again trying to commit to memory every single detail, every precious second she lived inside this house. Taking her black cloak from the coat hanger near the door she destroyed when she arrived, she gazed around the house one last time before heaving a lonely sigh and turning her back to leave the house forever.

Once outside, she did not turn back. A good distance away she saw Clark sitting on the white fence, looking forward.

"Have you thought of a name already?" She broke the silence in the night to sit beside him, placing the cloak on her lap.

He turned to her. "What?"

"A name…" She tried a smile. "…Or are you planning on being Clark Kent while you save the world?"

There was a rueful smile that escaped from him. "I can't do that of course."

The fact totally escaped his mind because, he had to admit, he had been preoccupied lately. And the center of this preoccupation was just perched on a sturdy piece of wood painted in white, a good few inches to his right, wearing a very charming look that was made more enchanting by the bright blue eyes.

"Then think of a name."

"A name for a superhero…let's see…" He considered for a moment.

A brief silence fell as she tried to lighten her mood and busied her mind by helping him.

"Man from the stars?"

He suddenly erupted in laughter, remembering that it was the first name she had for him. "Too long."

"Starman."

"I think that's a title of a movie."

Her face looked at the sky as if waiting for a suggestion. "Superstarman."

He laughed again. "Corny."

"What then?" She gave up.

"I'll…think of something."

"You better, you have less than a day to find a suitable name."

Upon saying the truth, at the simple reminder that time was of the essence, both their faces registered the earlier expression of sadness. And for another awkward moment, there was silence.

The world as he knew it would definitely change when she left, he was so very sure of it. And it was a thought that made him feel a little less happy.

"How was dinner?" He stopped his train of thought.

"It was…delicious," she answered with a disguised wistfulness in her eyes that he did not miss.

It was not the answer he was expecting. "Better than mom's cooking?"

"It's…different." She was at a loss on what to answer. "I can't say it's better because…I've never had steak cooked by Martha before."

"Don't worry…I won't tell," he smirked. When she volunteered no more additional information, his expression became serious as he pressed the matter further. There was something in her eyes that made him want to find out. "How about the company? How was…Bruce?"

Her fingers started playing with the cloak on her lap. "He…behaved himself."

The signs were slowly revealing, becoming too obvious that she was desperately trying to conceal something. He could feel her uneasiness. "What happened, Diana?"

In turn, she could feel the genuine concern in his soft voice. And it became easier to open her heart. "We…talked, argued…" She smiled, a faraway smile, at the appropriate word. "…We ate dinner, danced…and we talked again."

He did not like the way he was reading her at the moment, as if he was seeing right through her, while her eyes had this faraway look as if remembering something precious, oblivious that he was monitoring every sign her body was revealing to him. And he stopped, feeling guilty, and…afraid of what he would find behind her eyes. But all it took was just another simple look and he knew…because she was always bad at hiding expressions on her face. It was either that, or he was beginning to know her very well.

Yes, he knew what she felt even though she had not even admitted a word. "He gave you another reason to feel bad about leaving."

Her eyes looked at him with confusion with a hint of regret. "Can you read minds?"

"No…" At the moment he wished he could. Because there was a small part of him that wanted to know how she felt…about him. "I don't have to read your mind to feel…the sadness."

She sighed. "The moment I set foot outside Themyscira…I was filled with excitement. And I always thought that I will feel that way upon returning to my people." Her eyes were downcast. "But…Hera forgive me, I do not feel that way anymore."

"Then…stay." His eyes begged her.

Another regretful smile appeared on her lips when she noticed that his face and tone were almost the same as Bruce's. "We both know I can't. Just like the way we both know that you can't escape your fate to be a greater man."

"If I had any other choice…"

"You would give up what you have?"

He did not answer but looked away from her questioning eyes.

"Many would do anything to have power, your powers."

"I'm not like most people."

"No…you are not." She reached out and touched his hand her thumb rubbing affectionately on his skin. "That is why it must be you. Kal-El, Clark…to make things simple, just try and think you are not saving the world. You are just saving Martha and Jonathan."

"And you." He could not prevent his lips from saying because it was the truth. Somewhere in this sometimes cruel world, there is you, Diana, he wanted to add.

"Yes, and me." She squeezed his hand. "Thank you…for being a very good friend."

Something inside him flinched upon hearing her words, as his breath caught for the shortest of moments. But unlike her, he was better at concealing his emotions.

Maybe…he felt something for her, maybe…what a brother felt for a sister, or a best friend to another. Or maybe…something more, that of all the beats his heart had in one day…most of them sang her name. If only they were given more time, he would not be this confused anymore.

All he was certain of at the moment was that he did not want anything more than for her to stay.

But she was right. There were things that simply could not be…not meant to be.

He knew then that this significant instant was the start of many great sacrifices.

"You're welcome." He finally responded, a little too late, with a voice that was lacking a little enthusiasm. But that did not stop him from fixing his gaze into her eyes, looking intently at her, as if trying to capture all of her beauty for the last time. "Will I ever see you again?"

"I don't know, Kal…" There was no denying the sadness. "Maybe never again."

He could not accept her answer. "Don't say never, Diana."

In a response of her own, she held his gaze for a long time, staring deep into the blue eyes, then all of the handsome, open and friendly face before inching her body closer to lean her head on his broad shoulder. Adjusting to her nearness, he closed his eyes for a while and just breathed in the welcome and fragrant scent of her before brushing the side of his face to her hair. Then he closed his other hand on her hand that was holding his. And they remained that way for a long while, not speaking, but just contented to hold each other close, looking at the dark sky, the stars and the moon that were witnesses to the start of a very strong friendship.

"So…" She shifted a little. "How is the young woman several houses away?"

He raised a confused brow that she was not able to see because of their position. "Lana?"

"I don't know anyone else whose picture is framed in your room and is secretly hidden somewhere."

He smiled into her hair. He would like to have her picture framed to be hidden somewhere in his room but he knew she would object.

In his silence, she teased him by coughing a word. "…Chicken."

"I'm not a chicken."

"Then what are you waiting for?" She shifted more to finally face him. "Aren't you sure of your feelings for her?" She thought of Bruce, how sure he was of his feelings for her.

I was sure of my feelings…until almost two days ago when you came barging into my life. "These things take time."

She moved away slightly, shaking her head while wearing an amused expression. "Just as I said…chicken." She withdrew her hand from him and gave him a light punch on the arm. When he did not budge, she applied more force.

"Now I have to say…" She's definitely strong he thought as he touched his suddenly sore arm. "…That one slightly hurt."

"Hera…you were hurt by that?" She tired mocking him. "That…was nothing."

He slid off the fence. "Really now…" He assumed a defensive stance. "Show me what you got."

Placing the cloak on the fence, she hopped to the ground and flexed her muscles. "Are you sure you are up to it, Man from the StarsSuperstarman?"

He hated the names she had for him but laughed anyway. "Bring it on, sister."

In space, a large boulder continually spun in its fixed course, slowly inching its way in the vast darkness to collide with the earth while a smaller and slower one from a different direction traveled to cross the path that the earth passed about two days ago.

And as the rest of Smallville peacefully lay in slumber, as the night so very slowly stretched into early morning and the remaining seconds of her life in her newfound home ticked away, two very good friends spent the last few hours of their short life together as best as they could.

They ran through the golden cornfields hiding from each other, they flew in the quiet night testing each other's speed, they fought and sparred to share with each other the knowledge necessary to defend, to fortify the strengths and lessen the weaknesses. And more importantly, they laughed as good friends do, not caring if they would wake up anyone.

For the first time in their lives, they did not hide who and what they really were.

And when the first rays of sunlight peeked through the blanket of the dark sky, they both looked sadly at the horizon, then at one another. Then slowly he held out his hand and she took it willingly. And with a simple embrace, they held on to each other for a few precious moments before letting go and flying to where the sun was to rise.

Holding on to each other's arms, they flew fast, slicing through the air as the earth below them disappeared into nothing but an obscure abstract image, different colors blending into one as faster and faster they traveled at the opposite direction from where the earth spun. No longer able to ignore the incessant pull, the entire planet stopped before slowly turning to where they lead. Faster and faster they still flew in a flash of light through the air, turning day into night and night into day. And when the moment was just right, they slowed to turn back and fly faster again, just to make sure that the planet was spinning back on track.

And just as the world was beginning to wake up from it all, she turned her face and looked at him for one last time before she disentangled from the embrace, to finally say her goodbye.

"Goodbye…Kal-El of Krypton." A tear escaped her eye as she leaned forward.

He closed his eyes when he felt her lips settled on his. And he fought against the very urge to hold her tighter, to move his lips against hers to give more meaning to the gesture offered in friendship. But because they were very good friends that would be enough for him.

"Goodbye…Diana of Themyscira." He said when she pulled away. But the hand that was holding hers did not want to let her go.

And when he finally set her free, she gave him one last heartfelt smile before turning away and never looking back.

He returned home with a heart that was burdened. But he released himself from the emotions and chose to deal with all of them later. As of the moment, he had more important things to take care of.

He entered the quiet house and checked the time. He was right on schedule. There was another thing left to do.

With determination in his movements, he walked out of the house, and as he closed the door he also knew that he was closing a very significant part of his existence, saying goodbye to the ordinary world he knew. In the stillness of the night his steps led him to the barn. In a secret place, where a big, old box silently lay, he searched for something he had been hiding for a long time, a particular green crystal, a gift from his real parents, the key to his inevitable destiny. And as he lifted the lid of the box, the green crystal glowed from the inside as if awaiting his arrival.

As his hand touched the sparkling glass, he knew his life would never be the same.

A few hours later, as the world waited in confusion and in terror from the unavoidable impact of an asteroid that was supposed to miss, that would result in a significant devastation, the earth was saved by a young man in blue and red who would be later known as Superman.

And that night, Clark Kent drove by himself to the fund raiser, once in a while glancing with an emptiness at the passenger seat, his sad eyes partially obscured by a pair of ridiculously wide rimmed eyeglasses even though his vision was more than perfect.

A few minutes after, and right on schedule, his then friend and would be nemesis entered the room, accompanied by a young woman who used to occupy most of his thoughts. The pair did not even see him and he later turned his attention somewhere else. A quick look at one corner, he could see Bruce Wayne talking to other men, but the young businessman did not see him. And for a while he studied the face, as a song flawlessly serenaded, as the lights dimmed further to emphasize the tender moment.

He could not help asking what she saw in this man.

She…Diana…the woman who literally and figuratively moved the earth with and for him.

A few minutes later, as Patti Austin ended her song, he fixed his eyes on a particular area in the large room. At the very same spot, a few nights ago, a beautiful and remarkable woman he met in a time that never happened was just standing there, mad as hell and glaring at the playboy who just passed him by.

If Bruce Wayne only knew the life he was missing…he smiled regretfully at the thought.

He missed her already.

"Got a light?" A female voice asked.

"I don't smoke." He was still looking at the floor.

"Neither do I," the female said. "…Who am I kidding? I'm trying to quit. So…are you planning on introducing yourself, or are you going to ignore me all night?"

He finally looked at her. "Clark Kent."

"Lois…" She held out her hand. "Lois Lane."

"That's about it…" She sighed in the end, as if it was such an ordeal reliving her past. "The true story no one else knows, except for the three of us."

J'onn considered for a moment as they sat opposite each other. "That explains the strong bond you and Superman share."

"And why I keep running after…someone we both know." She tried to make light of an otherwise gloomy situation. "Now…I have to avoid him like the plague."

"You don't have to."

She shrugged. "What else can I do? I feel selfish just thinking of being with him."

"Why would you feel that?" J'onn still asked even if he could feel the turmoil within her. He knew it would help if she admitted her feelings to herself.

"Because…" Her hands felt the comforting smoothness of the pillow on her lap. "I would be giving up so much…and I will never be the same…if I am mortal. I will not have the same chance to help fight for justice, the reason I came here in the first place."

"Not all your life should be devoted to this never-ending fight."

She looked at her hand on the pillow as if to avoid the Martian's probing stare. "J'onn…sometimes I can't help but think I was…created more to fulfill a mission than born to be just a daughter." It hurt her to admit her sentiments. "I know it's unfair to think of my mother that way…but…what else can I think when I have this life…not allowed to be…free."

J'onn just listened to her admission and she continued. "I can't step out of the island. And once I have, I can't return because I am exiled for helping save my family." Then she added in almost a whisper. "I cannot fall in love…"

For a while J'onn just looked at her face and wondered how it must have felt all those years, having these feelings and memories and what a burden it must be to carry this secret love for a man that could not be confessed, knowing that in another life, he loved her too.

"Diana…your gods can establish any set of rules, force any punishment, inflict any curse…but they cannot live your life for you. It will always be your choice. And when you do choose, don't question yourself if you are making the right decision because I don't think there are any wrongs in this." The Martian's voice spoke softly. "I can't see any wrong in putting everyone else's welfare ahead of you and I cannot see any wrong either in falling in love. So make the decision because it is what you want."

She faced him again. "I don't know what I want."

At the moment he heard the absolute uncertainty in her otherwise brave voice, he wanted to hold her hand in comfort. If only he was as affectionate as Superman, or as good as lightening the moment like Flash. But he was not. "I can't make you decide, nor can anyone else. All I can give now is a part of my past." All he could offer were his words.

"I had a family, a wife and children. Now they are gone. But in a short while, I was given the chance to feel how it is to be loved and to love just as much in return." His eyes never wavered from hers. "If given another chance, Diana…I will still live that life, even with the knowledge that in the end I am still going to lose them. There is only one great love in our lives and I was blessed because I found that love even for just a short while."

Deep inside, she knew what she wanted. But she was not brave enough to admit it.

One great love. It could be for a man. It could be for all mankind.

One great love for a man. I found that once, long ago. I had my chance for the briefest of moments. Now it is time for the other great love.

"Thank you, J'onn."

"You are always welcome, Diana. Now go and live your life."

Kal was right. And she smiled with the thought that he was almost always right.

As she walked in quiet contemplation along the hallway, she felt that a certain amount of the burden she was feeling was lifted off from her shoulders. Even if there was truly no solution to her problem, hearing her own voice recall the events, reliving the moments that she had treasured in secret, sharing the wonderful moments freely with someone was such a release.

During the afternoon she attended a meeting that was held to settle concerns regarding the schedule for monitor duty on Christmas. Surprisingly, Bruce was there wearing his trademark arrogance that came with the costume, not bothering even with the slightest politeness of giving her a curt nod in acknowledgement of her presence.

Since she was one without a family to celebrate the special day with, and the fact that she did not celebrate the holiday at all, she volunteered to stay on Christmas eve and declined Superman's offer to spend the holiday at the farm. She knew very well that part of the reason he asked her was to fortify everyone else's suspicion that they were indeed an item.

But just confessing to J'onn made her feeling still too open and raw and she did not want her past to stare her in the face when she saw Martha and Jonathan, the very warm house and the peaceful farm, once more.

Kal would have to settle for J'onn again instead.