Most of the shops in Konoha didn't open until past 9AM and Ayame had to be at the ramen stand by 11AM. So hard to be a working girl, she had been working with her dad at the ramen stand ever since she could remember. It was practically all she knew. She had few nice clothes since she rarely needed them. Who would see them underneath her stained ramen robes?

She looked in the store windows and decided on a little boutique that looked quite hip. After waiting for 30 minutes, a young man with hair funkier than Kakashi's, and in a weird assortment of colors, came to open shop. He looked at Ayame and smiled. "Our first customer of the day! What a lovely way to start. Anything I can help with, just ask pretty lady." He gave her a wink, but somehow Ayame felt he was not interested in women.

"I'm looking for something…exciting. You know, kunoichi-like."

"Ahh, yes, the kunoichi look. That's the newest, coolest fashion fad."

"Really? Then you have fishnet and bandages?"

"In any style you want, sweetie." He showed her an assortment of products: a tube top sewn to mimic bandages coupled with a loose fishnet shirt, shorts that looked like layers of bandages, gloves and socks sewn to look like bandages, some with blood splatters to look even more authentic.

"Hmm…the blood looks a bit tacky, but I'll take the bandage tube top and the fishnet blouse." She looked around the store at some odd accessories - collars with studs, leather shirts with chains, some items she could not identify, and then settled on a plain leather mini-skirt.

-...-...-...-

Ayame felt the fishnet stockings cutting into her legs and she could feel welts rising and rashes forming. But she could bear anything for Kakashi! The leather skirt was so form fitting she could barely move and she could barely walk in her high heel sandals. The bandage tube top bound her chest so tightly she could barely breathe. But she could bear anything for Kakashi! Ayame had shoulder length brown hair but it was usually tied up in a kerchief. Now she had it long and loose and moussed up in the front. But she had used too much gel and mousse so that her bangs stood up like kunai blades.

When she arrived at the movie theater, she looked around for the man of her dreams. But she only recognized the man with dark brown hair, tied neatly back in a ponytail, standing there with a bunch of assorted flowers, blushing and looking very uncomfortable. Iruka was dressed in his usual shinobi attire since he had a late day at the office. Ayame walked over, smiled at him and said, "Hello, Iruka-sensei," while her eyes continued to search for Kakashi.

Iruka practically shoved the flowers at her, saying, "Uh, these are for you."

"For me?"

"Yes. I thought they'd be a nice change from the roses."

`The roses…oh crap! He's the secret admirer, not Kakashi!' She felt like jumping into a cold well inhabited by a corpse with telekinetic powers. But Ayame was a practical girl. `Well, it would be impolite to just leave now. I mind as well go through with this date. It's a free movie at least. And Iruka-sensei is a nice enough guy. Should lose that geeky ponytail though…sooo not cool.'

Iruka bought the tickets, and offered to get popcorn and soda, but Ayame declined. `I have to watch my figure for Kakashi,' she thought. Iruka held open the doors, let her in first, and waited until she was seated, a perfect gentleman. The movie was just starting.

About 30 minutes into the movie, Iruka thought about placing his arm around her shoulders, but he looked behind him first to ensure that he wouldn't be interfering with someone's view (because he's such a great guy). He noticed a crown of spiky yellow hair trying to hide in the backseats, and realized he'd been followed!

"Er, excuse me, I need to…buy some candy. Would you like anything?" he asked his date.

"Huh? Oh, no, I'm fine." All Ayame could think about was, `Why isn't it Kakashi? Stupid, stupid Sakura, it's all her fault!'

On his way out of the theater, Iruka grabbed Naruto by the ear. "What do you think you're doing? Quit following me!" he admonished.

"I just wanted to see if you needed any help," the boy protested.

"I don't need help from a twelve-year-old!"

"Hey, that's gratitude for you! Who do you think got the two of you together?"

Iruka calmed down and gave Naruto an appreciative smile. "Thanks, Naruto. But it's just the first date. How about some privacy?"

"But I already paid for the movie ticket!"

"Fine, I'll reimburse you later. Now if you don't mind…" Iruka gave him a scowl then returned to his seat.

Upon his return, Ayame looked at him and asked, "So where's the candy? I'd like some, too."

"Huh? Candy? Oh, I…uh…went to the men's room instead. I'll get some now. Anything in particular?"

"Hmm, just a plain chocolate bar." `Sigh, I really need some chocolate! It's supposed to be equivalent to sex in terms of releasing endolphins or serotonic or something like that.' Ayame had recently read an article on chocolate in her "Ramen and Sake Magazine."

Iruka got up again and headed toward the back of the theater when he saw a pretty blonde girl with ponytails and bright blue eyes and… whiskers! "Naruto!" Iruka whispered harshly, "Get of here or I'll…"

-…-…-…-…-

After the movie, Iruka tried to engage his date in conversation, discussing the plausibility of henge using a polymorphic potion instead of chakra seals. It was a silly movie about kids in magic school, but it had some decent special effects. Ayame smiled and nodded, but not being a shinobi, she had no clue of the parallels between the fantasy magic movie elements and real life shinobi jutsu.

Then Iruka brought her to a bar, a classy one that served sake in respectable and clean cups. Ayame was silent throughout most of their time together (thinking about Kakashi) so Iruka felt the need to compensate. `She's so shy, how adorable,' he thought. He tried telling her jokes and amusing anecdotes.

"…so how many ANBU do you need to screw in a lightbulb?"

She shrugged, disinterestedly.

"Two, one to screw it in and another dead one to climb on." `Oh, that was not a good one.' "How many Kage do you need to screw in a lightbulb…"

Ayame thought,`I need to somehow gear the conversation to find out more about Kakashi.' She smiled and pretended to laugh at Iruka's punchline, even though she had no idea what he just said.

"So you and Naruto-kun are pretty close?"

"Oh, yes, he's like a… son to me." `This way she'll know I'm a family guy.'

"Are you close to any of your other students? I mean, you have so many. Do sensei become attached to their students?"

"Well, we're not supposed to have favorites, but Naruto is special because I'm an orphan like he is."

"You are?"

"Yes, my parents were killed fighting against the fox demon twelve years ago."

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that." `Poor guy, but I need to get back on track.'

"So is Naruto close to his other sensei…Kakashi-sensei…isn't it?"

"Kakashi? Not really. Naruto is always complaining about how Kakashi-sensei ignores him and favors his rival Sasuke.

"I'm sure he's fond of Naruto, too."

"Yes, but he's the type who's too cool to show it." `Who cares about Kakashi anyway? Arrogant bastard.'

"So he's a jounin and you're a chuunin?"

`Great just stab me in the back and pierce my heart while you're at it,' thought Iruka miserably. He was a bit sensitive about his rank. "Yes, but I'm trying to make jounin. Should be soon."

"What's the difference?"

"Jounin are usually assigned more dangerous missions, but chuunin missions often develop into missions just as dangerous," Iruka explained a bit defensively. "But enough about me, what about you? Have you always helped your dad at the ramen stand?"

"Hmm? Oh, yes, ever since I can remember…" `So Kakashi goes on lots of dangerous missions. How exciting! Yet worrisome, what if something happens to him?'

"Are you happy running a ramen stand? Not that there's anything wrong with it, but I always try to encourage my students to do their best and achieve their dreams. Like Naruto wants to be Hokage."

"Well, currently I'm trying to be the best ramen cook in all of Fire Country."

"Oh, I guess that's a worthy ambition." `She's quite a simple girl, isn't she, but I like that.' "So are you busy tomorrow? I hear there's a fair at Otafuku Village. It's mainly for tourists but it could be fun. We can catch a wagon just outside the main gate."

"I don't know. I'll have to think about it. I usually work during the day even when there are no customers. We have to do a lot of food preparation. Plus we make our noodles from scratch," she said proudly. "But maybe after the lunch rush," she added when she saw the sad puppy dog look of disappointment in his eyes.

"Okay, I'll drop by for lunch and you can give me your answer then. Maybe we can go after that and make it back before the dinner rush hour."

"Yes, okay we'll see…"

Another date with Iruka? Could she bear it? He's nice enough but…he's not Kakashi!

-...-...-...-

(Author's note: Endorphins and serotonin are purposely misspelled as part of Ayame's slight lack of intelligence. Also, Iruka means dolphin. (Otafuku is the lodging village 10km from Konoha))

-...-...-...-

Ayame was confused and depressed. The pound of chocolate she ate this morning hadn't helped at all. `So much for endolphins,' she thought. It wasn't a bad date with Iruka, but it just wasn't anything special. He paled so much in comparison to Kakashi that she looked right past him and his good qualities.

Back at work in the ramen stand, Ayame chopped her vegetables slowly and disinterestedly. When was Kakashi ever going to ask her out? Her ruminations were disturbed when Sakura entered her peripheral vision.

"Sakura! Sakura! What did you do?" Ayame called.

"Me? What are you talking about? What's going on with Kakashi-sensei?"

"Nothing's going on! Nothing at all! That's the problem."

"What about those roses and the note?"

"They're from Iruka-sensei!"

"Iruka-sensei? He's a great guy, why don't you go for him instead?"

"No, no! I want Kakashi! You have to help me!"

"I already did."

"But I haven't seen or heard from him. I thought the roses were from him but they're not. What am I going to do? Iruka-sensei asked me out again, but I'm not interested."

Sakura thought about Ayame's dilemma for a minute. Iruka-sensei really was the better choice, but she knew how love made no sense. After all, she was in love with a guy whose idea of a good time was intensive blindfolded target practice. "Wait a sec, I have an idea. Why don't you go out with Iruka-sensei again, and I'll tell Kakashi-sensei about it to make him jealous, to light a fire under his feet." ` I wonder if that would work with Sasuketoo.But there's no way I'd go out with Naruto, no matter what!'

"Hmm, that sounds like a good idea. You don't think it will backfire do you?"

"Well, I'll tell Kakashi-sensei that I think you prefer him to Iruka-sensei."

Ayame carefully evaluated Sakura's suggestion then nodded her approval. "That sounds good. Doesn't make me look desperate, and the ball is in his court. You sure are clever Sakura-chan!"

-...-...-...-...-

After an hour of tracking, Sakura found Kakashi at one of his favorite haunts - Pink Bookstore. She waited outside until he came out, as it would be inappropriate for someone her age to enter such an establishment.

"Good morning Kakashi-sensei."

"Good morning Sakura-chan. Uh, did I miss a training session this morning?"

"No, I just needed to tell you something." `Get yourself a damn appointment book! And a watch!' "I hear Iruka-sensei is interested in the ramen girl. You'll miss your opportunity if you don't do something."

"Oh, really?"

"Stop acting so cool! Do something! Aren't you interested?"

Kakashi shrugged.

"You do like girls don't you?"

He shrugged again.

"Well, don't you want a nice cozy home and someone to come home to after a long mission? Someone who will draw your bath, give you a massage, serve your food…" Sakura started to think of herself and Sasuke and drifted off…

In her daydream, she was home humming while making salmon roe riceballs. After those were done, she skipped over to the bathroom where she turned on the water and added bubble solution. She heard the door open and quickly ran over to greet her love with a passionate embrace. Sasuke pushed her away, grabbed one of the riceballs, and seemingly swallowed it whole, without chewing, on his way to his bath. She followed him to help him remove his clothes. Sasuke suddenly turned to her and scowled, saying, "The bath is cold. Your hands are cold. The food is cold."

At that more realistic vision, Sakura came back to reality. "Anyway, I heard Iruka-sensei asked her out but she hasn't given him an answer. If you hurry, you can get a date with her instead. She really likes you."

"Well, I'll think about it…"

-...-...-...-...-

It was Iruka's day off, an uncommon day with no classes or missions. He hadn't had one of those in a very long time. After running some errands in the morning and preparing for the next day's classes, Iruka made his way over to Ichiraku. Although it was his day off, Iruka still wore his shinobi uniform because he thought it made him look more impressive.

Ayame was in the back cooking, or rather fussing with the heat to achieve the perfect temperature, while her father took the orders.

"What will you have today Iruka-sensei?" He gave Iruka an appraising look and thought, `He's no Kakashi, but he's nice enough. And he does put up with that brat Naruto.'

"Umm, roast pork ramen please," Iruka said while looking down at the menu, even though he had it memorized. He was too embarrassed to meet his eyes. `I wonder what she told her father. I wonder if she had a good time.'

Iruka thought back to the previous night. He had walked her home in silence. He was trying to think of how to end the night, how to say good-bye. Should he attempt a kiss on the cheek? Anything more would be inappropriate for a first date. But her father was by the door waiting, so he just bowed and said goodnight to them both.

`Ayame sure seems like a nice girl, but what was withthe weird clothes? She's also a bit spacey, but in a cute way. I sure hope she decides to go out with me again. I think I was pretty impressive with my intelligent critique of the movie,' he thought as he waited for his ramen. He continued to pretend to study the menu, all fifteen items.

Someone crashed down on the seat next to him. It was his favorite ramen buddy, and quite often his least favorite person, Naruto.

"Miso ramen today!" Naruto yelled at the ramen guy. "Hey, hey, Iruka-sensei!" Naruto enthusiastically greeted, but then he dropped his voice to an uncharacteristic low whisper. "So how did it go?"

Iruka scowled and whispered harshly back, "You should know - I saw you in the sake house. Your henge is improving, but you still can't fool me. You know underage drinking is forbidden."

"Hey, I only ordered tea. Besides, I couldn't hear anything. I still haven't learned to read lips," Naruto said with a frown.

"Well, there's nothing to tell anyway. I asked her out again and I'm here to wait for her answer."

"Really? What do you plan to do next?"

"None of your business."

"Come on, come on, pleeeease tell me, please!"

"I'll tell you after the date. I don't want you following us again."

Naruto was finally quiet as their steaming bowls of ramen, fragrant with cilantro, were served. "Have you had the ramen here lately?" Naruto asked as he dove into his bowl.

"Actually, this is the first time in a week."

"Well, ever since you sent her flowers, it's been awesome!"

Iruka took a sip of the soup, then a bite of the noodles. `Naruto's right, there's something different about it. The soup is more flavorful, has more substance. The noodles have been cooked to perfection. Each strand is separate and exactly the right texture. It's…it's just…amazing!'

Ayame had measured the exact amount of water, added in the exact amount of salt, brought the water to a boil, added in the exact amount of peanut oil, then the noodles. She timed the cooking to the second, lifted and drained the noodles in a colander, rinsed the noodles with cold water, and finally added in a bit of sesame oil to prevent the noodles from sticking and to give them a bit of flavor. Then she placed the noodles in a bowl, added the appropriate stock heated to a constant temperature, then the flawlessly cut to size toppings and condiments. Perfect!

Naruto left after another five bowls, but Iruka waited around for an opportunity after the lunch rush to ask Ayame about their date. After the amazing bowl of ramen, he liked her even more,."So…uh…do you think you can get off for a few hours this afternoon?"

"Sure, dad can handle it from here." She gave him a slight smile. "Just give me a chance to change."

"All right, should I wait here?"

"Yeah, I'll be back in a flash."

`I wonder if she's going to wear those strange clothes again…' To Iruka's relief, Ayame returned wearing a normal plain blue dress.

"That's a nice dress. You look very pretty in that," Iruka said, blushing a bit.

"This old thing? I guess it's one of my favorites. Oh, I need to be back in time for the evening dinner rush hour." Not really, her dad could probably handle it, but she wanted a short date. After all, he's not Kakashi!

Iruka and Ayame walked out the tall gates of Konoha toward the main road to catch the wagon to the lodging village. But before they reached the main road, two black hooded ninja in gray robes appeared!

`Sound ninja!' Iruka thought frantically, `Is Orochimaru back again? Crap, I'm done for! I'm just an Academy teacher. My last serious fight was against Mizuki and he nearly killed me.At least Ayame is in civilian clothes. If she were dressed like yesterday, they'd think she's a kunoichi (or a call girl) and go after her too. I've got to protect her…while hopefully not getting killed myself!'

"Get down!" Iruka ordered in a commanding voice. He took out his shuriken and kunai to confront the attackers. Both Sound ninja threw shuriken, but Iruka quickly employed kawarimi and the replacement log absorbed the hits. Then he jumped down from a tree to take one enemy out…but it was a kage bunshin!

`Anyone who is capable of that technique would normally be a jounin and I should have been wasted already. Something fishy is going on,' Iruka analyzed. "Naruto!" he whispered harshly, "I know it's you, come out now!"

Blonde hair followed by an orange jacket appeared from behind another tree. "Hey, what you're mad about? I'm just trying to help you impress the ramen girl by showing off your ninja skills."

"Stop following me! If I catch you again…I'll…I'll…I'll tell them not to serve you any more ramen!" An empty threat since Naruto was their best customer, but it was all he could think of in his anger. But that threat got through Naruto's thick head and he finally left them in peace.

"What's going on? Was that Naruto I just saw? Where are the attackers?" asked Ayame, confused by all the action.

"It was just Naruto playing a prank on me, ha-ha." `I'll get back at him later, that brat!'

"Oh, did you tell him about our date?" she frowned. `If Naruto knows, then the whole village will know, and then maybe Kakashi will think I'm serious about Iruka.'

"Actually, he's the one who encouraged me to ask you out."

"Naruto? But why?"

"He told me that your dad told him that you…were interested…" Iruka turned red again.

`Oh crap! Now I understand. That Naruto! What an idiot! Dad too! If they cost me my chance with Kakashi, I'll…I'll…I'll dump my perfect boiling miso soup in their laps!'

-…-…-

At the fair, Iruka won some prizes from darts (despite their inferior quality and poor balance, rigged to prevent normal people from winning), which he presented to Ayame with a bow and great flourish. She smiled politely and thanked him. He offered to buy her various treats available from an assortment of vendors, but she declined.

`I can't have him spending any more money on me,' she thought guiltily while looking around, hoping Kakashi would magically appear. Iruka meanwhile was also looking around for signs of Naruto. Needless to say, conversation was limited as both parties were distracted, one by obsession, the other by paranoia.

On the way back, Iruka was afraid to make any romantic overtures as he was still concerned about Naruto's possible presence. Ayame was still wondering why Kakashi had not been around and whether Sakura did anything to help her at all. Iruka walked her back to the ramen stand where her father was busy with several customers. Ayame quickly excused herself to put on her serving robes and left before Iruka could say good-night and before he could ask her out again.

`This is not going so well,' Iruka sighed to himself as he walked slowly home. `I'll have to see Ino for some more romance tips. I know she's only twelve, but since I hang out with kids all day long,Idofeel a lot more comfortable speaking to her than my peers. Is that weird or what?'

Meanwhile, Ayame performed her waitress duties mechanically, missing Kakashi all the while. She kept a fixed smile on her face but she felt more like crying. Back home, Ayame sat sadly with her head in her hands. There was still no sign of Kakashi. What could she possibly do now? Sakura had spoken to him twice already. It seemed he was not interested in her at all.

Her father knew Ayame did not have the same feelings for Iruka that she had for Kakashi and that was why she seemed so sad. He said wisely to his daughter (not to cheer her up or anything, he just liked spouting ramen philosophy), "Unrequited love is like a bowl of noodles."

"Don't you mean ramen noodles?" she asked tiredly.

"You see, you want ramen noodles, but instead you get udon or soba. Udon is shorter but nice and thick, while soba…"

"Argh! Stop it! No more noodle analogies!" screamed Ayame hysterically. She ran to her room in tears and slammed the door.

Her father waited a minute before following her. He knocked softly then opened the door even though his daughter didn't answer. "Don't worry Ayame-chan, Kakashi-sensei should be coming by Ichiraku soon. Based on his habitually pattern, he gets ramen about once every two weeks."

Ayame stopped moping and saw a ray of hope. "Are you sure? How do you know?"

"Oh, uh…I remember stuff like that. You know, the eating habits of our regular customers. It's good for business…yeah that's it." He scratched the back of his head in embarrassment.`It's not like I'm obsessed with him or anything…'

-...-...-...-...-