No Ties, No Lies
Chapter 3
Monica was waiting at the trailer for Lonnie. It had been a few days since the breakfast with Lonnie and Lana. During that time, Monica had been doing some thinking. Something was definitely wrong, or at least different. After sitting down and analyzing all of the changes during the past two to three months, she felt that she had finally put her finger on it. And after the impromptu breakfast with Lonnie and Lana, she now thought she knew for sure. Just as she was running all of this through her mind, Lonnie pulled up. He got of the car, and appeared to be deep in thought about something himself.
"Hey, babe," he greeted. "You sleep okay last night?"
"Yeah, I guess," she responded. "Listen, we need to talk. I figured something out the other day after breakfast. And you and I need to decide how we're going handle it, if I'm right that is."
Lonnie took a deep breath. He had actually intended on telling Monica about Lana. 'No ties, no lies' sounded great in theory, but that was before he knew that the girls were friends. He just couldn't see not letting Monica know under these circumstances. But it appeared that she had already figured it out. Normally, Lonnie would let her go first so he wouldn't give up any information that wasn't necessary. But in this case, playing detective didn't seem appropriate or fair to Monica. As Willson Sweet had once warned him, this was someone's feelings, not a case.
"Okay," he said. "But, let me go first. I had no idea that you and Lana knew each other. I'm not even sure how it all happened. I just looked up one day and I….I just couldn't stop thinking about her. We started spending some time together, one thing led to another, and we….Honey, I'm sorry. I know it's weak, but I don't know what else to say. But it's over between me and her and has been for a while. Now that I think about it, there was never really anything there. I love you. I want you. And I'll do whatever it takes to make this right."
Monica didn't speak. She couldn't. She just stood on the porch and stared at Lonnie with the most wide-eyed and blankest look Lonnie had ever seen on anyone. At the moment, he realized that he'd messed up.
"Are you telling me that you've been sleeping with her?"
'Damn!' Lonnie thought. But it was too late. Everything was on the table. "Yes. But…"
Monica pointed her finger directly in his face. "Don't!" She then turned her back to him. Lonnie wanted to hold her, but he left her alone. Finally she turned to face him again with both hands on her hips. "So what was it?"
"What was what?"
"The reason you were attracted to her."
Lonnie shrugged his shoulders and shook his head. "I don't know."
"Bull!" Monica screamed. "I know you better than that, Lonnie Jamison! You may not be a saint, but there's no way in hell you'd go to bed with a woman and not know why. Even if the answer's 'you were horny', that'd be a hell of lot closer to the truth!"
Lonnie looked away from her for a moment and then found a way to face her again. "You're right. I guess there was a lot about her that reminded me of you. And I was under a lot of stress, with everything going on at the station, me and Virgil, Bill being booted out. I guess I got to thinking…." Lonnie stopped himself. He knew exactly what it was, but he couldn't stand the thought of saying it to Monica.
Monica looked at him. When it was clear that he wasn't going to finish, she spoke. "How about I finish that thought for you, Lonnie? You watched what was happening to Bill and wondered if we were worth it. You remembered what you almost lost at the hands of Virgil and wondered if we were worth it. You were wondering how you would become a detective in Sparta running around with some black girl from the Bottoms. And you wondered if your life would be easier if you replaced dark-skinned me with the Sparta-Approved blond version. Am I close?"
Lonnie felt tears swell up in his eyes. He looked at her and then couldn't face her. He lowered his head and refused to speak.
"You answer me, damn it!"
"Yes." He whispered. "You're right. But I was wrong, Monica! I was so wrong. I love you. I don't want anything but you. I want to marry you. I know that now. Baby, please!"
Monica turned away from him again. She was trying to handle this like an adult. She knew that she had put him on the backburner of her life while she took care of school. She had assumed that, as always, he would simply wait for her. And she knew that she had asked him to do whatever it took for him to be sure that an interracial relationship was what he wanted. Plus, he didn't know that she and Lana were friends. She was trying to remember all of this when she asked, "If Lana and I didn't know each other, would you have told me?"
Lonnie finally looked up at her. "No, I wouldn't have."
Anger swelled up inside of her, but she didn't respond to it. Instead she heard Althea Tibbs warning her of the pain that sometimes comes with getting what you ask for. Monica had told the man to find to his own way through this; and he had. "And what now, Lonnie? What do you feel now?"
He couldn't keep away from her any longer. Lonnie went to her and put his arms around her. He expected her to pull away from him, but she didn't. Instead she buried herself in his chest and started to cry as Lonnie said, "I love you so much that sometimes it hurts to look at you. I see you running around and I wonder what you'd look like chasing our kids around the house. I hear your name and wonder if you'll take mine when we get married or if you'll go Yankee on me and decide to hyphenate it. I love you so much that I won't let you walk away from me because this corn-fed white boy messed up."
Monica remembered those words from three years ago and her heart melted. She looked deep into his eyes and asked, "Are you sure? I mean really, really sure. Because I can't feel this way again, LJ. I won't, not even for you."
Lonnie reached into his pocket and pulled out a silver charm. It was in the shape of a small ring with a tiny fake diamond on it. He gently placed it in the palm of her hand, kissed her fingertips, and said, "I'm sure. One hundred percent."
Monica kissed him and through tears of joy she responded, "Good. Because I think I'm pregnant."
XXX
Lana and Bill were at her place having lemonade outside. It was a rough road, but the two of them finally found their way to their relationship. They were now about close as any father and any daughter could be. Bill was counting on their new found love for each other, since he intended on probing her about Lonnie.
"So," Bill said between a big gulp of lemonade. "How're things with Lonnie?"
Lana smiled at her father. "Come on, Pop. You're not going to pull the gun-toting daddy routine, are you?"
"No, no. I reckon that'd be somewhat out of line. Besides, Lonnie would win that one hands down."
Both Lana and Bill laughed, since everyone knew that Lonnie was the best shot on Sparta's police force. Then Bill asked, "Seriously, are the two of you okay? I'd heard there may be some complications there."
"Lonnie and I talked about everything. And we know exactly what we are to each other. There are no complications, Pop."
Bill smiled at the thought of Lana and Lonnie being together. He'd known Lonnie since he was a boy and he couldn't think of a better man for his little girl. He knew that Lonnie had been involved with Monica. Virgil wouldn't have made up something like seeing them together. But he couldn't imagine Lonnie simply using either of the girls that way. Maybe Lonnie believed that he loved Monica at the time, but now he was in love in with Lana. At least, that's what Bill's heart was telling him. Bill had waited his whole life for a child. Now that he had one, all he would allow himself to see was her happiness.
"Well," he said. "Now that I know my little girl is happy, I can go to work in peace. You call me if you need me, now." He kissed Lana on her cheek and headed back to the Sheriff's department.
Lana knew that she had misled her father. But to her, that was simply a technicality. Now that she knew who her competition was, winning Lonnie back would be easy.
XXX
The trial of the Reverend Elijah Pitman began the following week. As anticipated, it went fairly quickly. The Reverend, in a religious fervor, had kidnapped and raped eight Sparta girls last year. Monica would have been his next victim had his son, Aaron, not discovered what his father was doing and kidnapped Monica himself to keep his father from getting to her. In his insanity, the Reverend admitted to everything he had been charged with. While the trial was pretty cut and dry, Monica was nervous about testifying and reliving the kidnapping over again. By the time the verdict came in, she was completely worn out and just wanted to go home and sleep.
"Hold on there, girlfriend. I know you're not trying to sneak out of here without speaking!"
Monica turned around and saw Luann Corbin grinning at her.
"Hey, Luann. Opps! I mean Sergeant Corbin."
Luann laughed. "Yeah, get it right, girl! I won't make you kiss my feet until I become a Lieutenant."
The two women laughed some more, and then Luann spoke again. "You did real good today. I know that was scary."
"Yes, it was. I thought I was going to throw up when Darnelle started questioning me. And poor Aaron. I wanted to go give him a hug, but his lawyer wouldn't let me."
Luann patted the girl's shoulder. "Don't worry. He knows you're grateful to him. Ew! What's wrong? You just turned three shades of green! And that's no easy feat for a black woman!"
Monica all of sudden felt horrible. Her head was killing her, she wanted to lie in the floor of the courthouse, and now her stomach was cramping something fierce. "Luann. Take me to the hospital."
XXX
Monica was lying on the bed in the trailer, crying. Her right hand was wrapped around her left wrist, fingering the silver teddy bear Lonnie had added to her charm bracelet for the baby. Outside on the porch, Lonnie and Luann were talking. Monica had Luann take her there after they left the hospital, and Luann had called Lonnie for her as soon as they arrived.
"I figured something was up with you two", Luann said. "I just didn't think it was cool to ask. Then everybody started gossiping about you and Lana, so I just left it alone."
"Yeah, well. Thanks for not prying. And thanks for taking care of her today." Lonnie started to say something else, but he felt himself getting teary eyed again. Luann noticed it too.
"Hey, man. It's going to be all right. You two have got plenty of time. Shoot, Monica's just a baby herself. Ya'll getting married anyway, so just try again."
"I know, Luann. But we were so sure, both of us were. Hell, even Etta Kibbey thought she was pregnant, and that woman knows everything."
Luann laughed. "Yeah, but it's like Dr. Day said. When a woman's under stress, her body can play tricks on her. Between school and the trial, it's no wonder she was getting false signals. That's why the first pregnancy test came back inconclusive. Just be glad it was fatigue and not a miscarriage. Those things can be real complicated and dangerous."
"You're right. And thanks again. Listen, she and I haven't decided to make our debut yet, so…"
Luann pretended to zip her mouth shut, gave Lonnie a final hug, and left. Lonnie went inside to check on Monica. She was still playing with the teddy bear and crying. Lonnie lay on the bed beside her and held her until she fell asleep.
XXX
The next morning, Lonnie went by the Tibbses old place to explain to Mrs. Kibbey what happened and where Monica was.
"Lord have mercy! Lieutenant, I'm awful sorry I got you all worked up over nothing. And here I was dreaming about fishes and everything! Dr. Day say she gonna be okay?"
"Yes ma'am. She's just fatigued. The doctor wrote her out of school until January and she has orders to get plenty of rest."
"Did the doctor write us out how we s'posed to keep that child still for two months?"
The two them laughed when Etta asked, "Now… how are you?"
Lonnie gave the woman a weak, yet warm smile. "I'm okay, Mrs. Kibbey. I never thought much about being a daddy before. Then when I thought I was gonna be I couldn't wait for it."
Etta grabbed Lonnie's hand and laughed. "You ain't got to wait, Lieutenant. You just got to marry her first!"
XXX
Monica followed Dr. Day's orders…for all of three days. But her type 'A' personality was making her difficult to be around. She and Lonnie stayed at the trailer during those three days, and then he took her back to the Tibbses before people began asking questions. It was on day four that Monica figured out how she was going to survive the next two months.
"So anyway," she said to Lonnie on her phone. "I switched my classes around, ordered a lap top, and I'll be taking my last electives on-line. That way I can stay on track and get out of there by the summer."
Lonnie laughed. "God help us all if one of your plans doesn't go through! Are you in bed?"
"Yes." Monica lied. She was actually in the kitchen getting a glass of water.
"You're lying. But I'll let that one slide."
Monica giggled and then decided to go ahead and tell Lonnie what she had been dreading. "Lana's coming to see me today."
Lonnie took a minute before he responded. "You sure that's a good idea? You up to that right now?"
"LJ, I know this sounds crazy, but in some ways my relationship with Lana is as important to me as my relationship with you. You're my first love, she's my first friend. If there's a way for me to have both of you, I'd like to try and find it. Besides, she called me when she heard I was sick. And I think that's a good sign. You said you two ended it pretty decently, right?"
"As far as I can tell. I mean, if she was mad she'd have said something by now, right?"
"Oh most definitely! Besides, we're both adults. I think we can handle this. Can you?"
"If you two can work it out, then I guess I'll have to. I really wish you'd just leave it alone. You two have got a lot in common, but in a lot of ways you're different. Listen, I gotta run. Love you. And go to bed!"
Just as Lonnie hung up, the doorbell rang. Monica opened the door.
"Oh man! You look like hell!" Lana exclaimed with a smile on her face.
Monica smiled back. "Thanks for the vote of confidence."
The two women went into the living room and sat down. Monica filled Lana in on her condition and then the conversation became decidedly awkward. So Monica spoke first.
"Lonnie told me about the two of you. I'm not going to lie. It hurt, and it still does. But, I also realize that none of us knew exactly how we were all involved with each other. And there were things in our relationship that inadvertently put Lonnie in pretty hazy place. That's why I wanted to tell you that I'm not mad at you and that I still want us to be friends, if we can."
Lana knew Monica would say precisely what she did. She had counted on it. "Oh Monica. I'm so glad to hear you say that. I feel so bad, but you're right. If I had known Lonnie was yours, I never would've slept with him." Lana smiled inside when she noticed that Monica had winced at the 'slept with him' part. "Besides," Lana continued. "We weren't all that serious. It was only sex."
Monica flinched again. She knew that Lana and Lonnie had been together, but hearing the words 'slept with him' and 'sex' made her skin crawl. Lana couldn't be doing this on purpose, could she?
"I know it was only sex. Lonnie told me the exact same thing." Monica knew that was a bitch move, but she couldn't help herself. Lana picked up that Monica was getting tired of the word play. And she needed Monica in order to keep her plan moving.
"I'm sorry, Monica. I didn't think about how those words would make you feel. Listen, I truly apologize for hurting you. I don't want to lose you. You're the only real friend I've got. Or that I ever had."
That did it. Between finding out about Lonnie and Lana, the trial, and the baby that never was, Monica was emotionally open. Lana's soothing words did the trick and the two girls were hugging each other in tears.
Over the next few weeks, Lana and Monica started spending more time together. Monica explained to Lana that she and Lonnie didn't want anyone to know about their relationship just yet. Lana was surprised, but she didn't try to change Monica's mind. That was an unexpected, yet, welcomed piece of information that would help her even more. And against his better judgment, Lonnie even joined the girls for lunch when he could, at Monica's request. They were discussing this one day at the trailer while Lonnie was changing the oil in Monica's car.
"It just feels weird, hon. I know she's your friend, but I don't trust her. I'm doing this for you. I just wish you would show up on time. Every time you're late and I'm there alone with Lana, the whole town starts grinning at us. Like they're waiting for me and Lana's wedding or something."
Monica laughed. "Well, they are! Anyway, the people important to us know the truth, and Lana said she explained everything to Bill. So it's fine."
"Not for me it ain't."
"LJ, she's going to be around and we all need to learn to deal with it. She and I have. Why can't you?"
He crawled from underneath her vehicle and said, "Because she wanted more from me and I wouldn't give it to her."
Monica crossed her arms across her chest, shook her head and laughed softly. "Baby, I love you. You are my world and you know it. But I swear you have a chauvinist streak a mile wide."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"It means that you can't accept the fact that a woman ran the same game on you that you've been running since you were 13. She was in love with another man, LJ! You were something for her to do in the meantime. You got played….get over it."
Lonnie was pissed. He stood up, wiped his oil covered hands on his jeans, and put his hands on his hips. "Really? Well, let me tell you something, Miss Know It All. That girl is gonna break your heart. Something about her ain't right."
Monica stood on her tiptoes and kissed Lonnie on his right eye, the only part of his face that wasn't covered with grime. "Yeah. She doesn't know a good thing when she sees it."
