Chapter 2: A Different Tactic

Disclaimer: I still don't own Suikoden or its characters. :sigh:

"Fred. Rico and I are coming in!" She yelled through the cast iron door.

"Rico?" Fred called hopefully.

"Master Fred!" The attendant ran over and hugged Fred.

"Uhhh," Fred said awkwardly and patted her on the head a couple of times and looked at Her questioningly.

"I couldn't very well leave her crying in the castle. I am rather fond of her." She smiled at Rico. "Anyway, she's agreed to help me keep house as long as she can be near you. She is remarkably devoted to you. Go figure. In light of this, I have decided to move you to different quarters with adjacent bedrooms. Come on."

Fred cautiously followed Rico and Her out the door into the hallway. "Nice digs."

She smiled. "Thank you. I got the idea while touring a stud farm overseas."

"Stud farm?"

"Uhhh…yeah…you know…a breeding farm for horses…Their stallion quarters were magnificent. I thought they were groom's quarters at first. They were like miniature houses all attached to one another with flower beds decorating the outside. They even had windows and beautiful Gaelic music playing for them."

"I don't hear any music," pouted Fred.

She stopped dead in her tracks, causing Fred to run into Her. "You WANT me to play some Gaelic music for you?"

"Well, it would be nice." Fred turned away nonchalantly. "Unless I'm not good enough for Gaelic music."

She sighed. "I'll see what I can do."

Later that day

"I can't believe I'm helping you with this!" Fred shouted as he followed behind Her.

"Percival is too clever and observant…and what is his weakness…bah, too much work."

Said knight looked at Her quizzically as She stood in the open door to the room looking at him thoughtfully. She next turned her gaze to Borus, briskly shook her head and moved away. She glanced towards Nash, propped up against the wall outside the door to the Flame Champion's room. "Later…" She mumbled and walked towards the stairs.

"Hey girl! I don't think I've met you before," a rough voice called out.

She turned towards the old mercenary fighting mage standing next to the comment box and smiled in amusement, never breaking stride.

"Some would consider you lucky," She glanced at Fred. "Or they're going to…" She muttered while studying the notepad. "Hmmm…no. Too reclusive." Fred, Rico and She were now walking around the castle grounds.

"Hey! Don't you think you should look where you're going?" Fred asked.

She stopped and looked at him, raising an eyebrow. "Who caught who in a trap?"

Fred looked at his feet. "You caught me," he mumbled submissively.

"That's right…Let's continue, shall we?"

"Oh, hi Barts!" Rico greeted the bishounen gardener.

She shook Her head. "Greeting the obsessed-over-his-tomatoes gardener. Wait…greeting the OVERLY obsessed-over-his-tomatoes gardener." She grinned diabolically. Victim number two…Barts.

The trouble with Barts was that he never seemed to leave his garden. No matter. She knew what to do. She reset her trap near the painting and found six juicy tomatoes to put under the trap. She then went over to Barts, who was standing in front of his garden looking bored.

"Barts. There are six juicy tomatoes inside the castle."

"Ah yes…tomatoes…so red and green and ever so juicy. Their flavor seems to…"

"Barts." She assumed a grave expression. "These tomatoes are in danger." Barts gasped, horrified. "If you don't go save them, they're going to get squished."

"No! Who would do such a horrible deed?" he screamed as he ran inside the castle. She raced after Barts, but he had too much of a head start on Her. As She got inside the castle he was already diving to save the tomatoes.

Beep. Swoosh. "EEEP!" The trap landed on Bart's foot as he attempted to leap under it, grabbing the tomatoes as he rolled out. Only, his foot didn't quite make it out and the trap landed directly on it, effectively ensaring him. Or so She thought.

"No! Don't come any closer! Stay away the tomatoes!" Barts threatened, struggling to release his foot.

She slowly walked towards him, gesturing placatingly with Her hands. "Barts. Just calm down. I'm not going to hurt the tomatoes. Oh…But it looks like one didn't survive." She pointed to the red splotch on the front of Barts' shirt.

"Noooooo!" Barts sobbed and suddenly yanked his foot out of the trap and sprinted for the door, limping.

She froze blinking in shock and confusion.

"Well, that didn't work so well…" Fred sounded smug.

"Okay. Who caught who in a trap?" She snapped.

Fred hunched his shoulders and stared at her defensively.

"Anyway, if at first you don't succeed…"

In a couple of minutes She had a different tactic in mind. She started setting up the trap right in from of him.

Even Fred was skeptical of this plan. "Oh c'mon. You think he's going to just walk into your trap and let you close the door behind him."

She smiled wickedly. "Just wait and see. While Barts was running to save the tomatoes in the hall I snatched some of his grapes and hid them in my coat."

She stepped into the trap and took out the grapes. Barts eyes widened and he immediately leapt at Her. "Give me those grapes!"

"Percival, NOW!"

Swoosh. Click.

"I don't believe it." Fred muttered in a monotone.

Barts was inside the now locked trap, holding the grapes and rocking back and forth.

"I thought he was your friend," Fred exclaimed.

"Oh, he is," Percival smirked, crossing his arms. "This is just a little payback for all his good timing in the past."

"Come on Barts," She said. "I have a very fertile piece of land all ready for you back at the ranch."

Fred looked at Her aghast. "The what?"

"If you have a better name for it, I'd like to hear it."

Fred shook his head and sighed.

She dragged Barts (and the grapes) out of the trap and into the main hall of the castle, Percival following behind, an amused grin fixed on his face.

"Now Viki. Pleeassee try to concentrate this time. Last time we landed in the moat."

"There's a moat?" Percival exclaimed breathing a laugh.

"No problem." Viki replied.

Blink.

"Oops."