Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of Numb3rs or have any rights to them.

After being buzzed in, Don entered the front door of the school and went up a set of stairs directly in front of the door, turning left at the top of the stairs. Here he found the main office, which he easily navigated past, and then went through a small hall to his right, entering the office of the principal, prior experiences easily guiding him.

He looked around the room. Everything seemed to have changed. First, he noticed that the ugly, psychedelic, 1970s- reject orange, which had inundated itself into every school he had ever seen in his life, was now replaced with subtle earth tones. There in front of him was a small, cherry wood desk with a computer- used to be typewriter- sitting on the right top of the desk. A row of modern metal cabinets- to the right of and behind the desk- replaced the worn, broken wooden cabinets of his high school days, while two comfortable couches lined the walls behind him and to his left, a mocking reminder of the three hard, plastic chairs that he and his friends had to uncomfortably sit in for hours. In the wall behind the desk was a new wooden door with a single panel of glass, the words "Principal Rooney" spelled out in cheap, plastic black lettering.

Rooney? Rooney! Couldn't be, Don thought, but, then again, the guy always had a unique talent for kissing ass.

Just then, a tall, blonde woman in her early forties entered the room. Her mind seemed absorbed with the file she held in front of her, as she placed her back to Don and slowly leaned over one of the drawers set into the bottom of the furthest file cabinet. Don was shocked that he recognized the secretary as the same one he'd had some twenty years before, when he had been an observant eighteen-year old.

Miss Sloane- probably Misses Somebody now- was the only good thing about visiting the principal's office. Having been hired his senior year, the long legs and perfectly formed ass of the twenty-two-year-old Sloane had kept the eyes of a teenage Don Eppes occupied for hours at a time, while the then-principal had made Don- "that young punk"- wait for his punishment. The administrator's thinking had been that the waiting would make Don nervous and think twice about visiting again. In a way, the principal's plan had worked; after 30 minutes of full observation of Miss Sloane's "filing" skills, Don thought twice- more than twice- about visiting the principal's office. And so it was that Don's parents and teachers considered his senior year his worst. Don, however, believed it to be his best.

Older women, he had learned, are extremely hot.

Now, a much older Don Eppes stood unmoving in front of the secretary's desk, pleased to have learned that some things about his high school had not changed. Having placed his sunglasses on upon entering the building- hoping to deflect any signs of fear on his face- Don allowed only his eyes to peer over the secretary's desk, while the rest of his body was still. Don's FBI training was not necessary for him to observe that the secretary had put on a few pounds, but he mentally noted that they were in all the right places. As the agent allowed his eyes a small trip down memory lane- and then back up again, and around a couple times more- he decided that if he were making a formal file on this suspect, the summary would be "Sloane- she's got some thump in her trunk".

"That has got to be Donny Eppes standing behind me", a voice suddenly chimed from the flock of blonde hair that flowed from the top of Sloane's backside.

Don became rigid, his eyes suddenly staring at the principal's door from across him.

Sloane stood up and turned toward Don, straightening the front of her blouse. Don could not help himself; his eyes immediately caught the movement and he found himself memorizing the way the loose silk of Sloane's blouse gently massaged down her bosom.

Ohhhh, Don moaned in his head, older women are still hot.

"How could I ever forget", Sloane continued, "the feel of those eyes sliding around on my posterior". The secretary gave Don a stern look, and he responded with the decency to blush from head to neck. Seeing his embarrassment, Sloane grinned, her smile embellishing small laugh lines around her blue eyes, which sparkled in the dim fluorescent light of the office.

Then Sloane did something unexpected- she flitted her eyes briefly to Don's ring finger. It only took a few seconds, but Don returned the favor and was surprised to see that she was missing not only a ring on her left hand, but the tell-tale white band of skin that would indicate she had recently had one.

Quickly appreciating the situation as much as he had Miss Sloane's form, Don tilted his head down and looked over the rim of his glasses at the secretary, overtly letting his eyes ride up her legs to her chest, and then finally landing them directly on her eyes. Giving her his most-wicked grin, he replied "I have a couple other body parts I'd like to slide all over that posterior" – then he flexed his hands.

It was Sloane's turn to blush- but her blush reached her toes as she began to feel her body heating up. Before she could reply, an annoyed voice sounded from the doorway behind her-

"I suppose that's our most illustrious former student, Donny Eppes".

Ward Rooney stood in the doorway of his office, a scowl on his face as he looked between Don and Miss Sloane, correctly guessing that something had been passing between them.

Both Don and Miss Sloane reluctantly recovered themselves, Don again straightening up, and then Sloane formally replied to the man behind her, "This is Special Agent Donald Eppes with the Federal Bureau of Investigation. He is here to give a speech for career day." She then brushed past Don- too close- and left the office. Don was left to face his old nemesis alone.

Don wasn't quite sure what to make of Rooney. The principal had been fresh out of college when he began teaching Don's junior year; he had been easy prey for Don and his sports friends, as they knew more about the machinations of high school than the still fresh Rooney had. By Don's senior year, however, Rooney had started to strike back- though, never successfully.

Assigned to oversee detention, Rooney came up with the 'clever' idea of nicknaming the students who were regular after-school visitors, justifying it by saying that the embarrassment would make them want to avoid detention, and therefore, behave. He had named one of Don's friends "Chester (can't pass the) Semester", because he had failed his junior year twice. Rooney addressed another friend as "Rob the Knob", as in 'dumb as a doorknob". When he got to Don, he couldn't come up with anything better than "Detention Don", laughingly telling Don that at the rate he was going, he'd still be serving detention well into his thirties.

Don and his friends took it in stride, as they viewed Rooney's attempts at getting even with them as amateur. That is, until Rooney came up with a name for Don's overweight pal Benny, as the teacher purposefully replaced the shy boy's name with the humiliating "Belly" each time he called roll during detention- and then during class, each time saying "Oops! Sorry- I can't imagine why I keep making that mistake" as he smirked at the unhappy teenager. The name caught on and Benny was soon at Don's house, tears in his eyes, unloading to Don that the name was making his senior year the worst one ever, as even teachers who liked him were starting to use the name. Angry that Rooney could hurt his friend so thoughtlessly, Don devised a plan to put a positive spin on the nicknames Rooney had handed out.

First, Don gathered his crew together, asking them to pool their allowances. He then went to the local sports shop and had each one of his friend's lettermen jackets emblazoned on the back with whichever individual nickname Rooney had assigned them. Next, Don and his friends took permanent markers to their t-shirts- as many as they owned; on the front, each one put his nickname, while on the back, they listed in a neat row all the nicknames Rooney had given them together. On top of that list, they wrote in big, black letters "Detention Dogs". Satisfied, they proudly agreed to wear their t-shirts everyday for the rest of the year. Don even managed to get the announcer of the sports games- a lovesick sophomore who was willing to do anything for the popular senior- to announce his friends as their nicknames whenever she was at the mike.

Suffice it to say that Rooney was not at all pleased. After a couple weeks of the teenagers' nickname flaunting, Rooney found that whenever he said "Belly" instead of Benny during roll, the other kids in class would give a small "whoop, whoop". And other students were purposefully getting detention, trying to get enough days in so they could be a "Dog", too, which doubled Rooney's after school workload, though his pay stayed the same. What infuriated him the most, though, was the smug smile on the face of Donny Eppes as he sat back in his seat and rubbed the front of his t-shirt, daring Rooney to complain about the him wearing the label he himself had bestowed upon the cocky senior.

It was during this first incident, senior year, that Ward Rooney decided he hated Don Eppes.

Now, Rooney was the principal of the school, and apparently still hated Don. He understood why Rooney had scowled at him before Miss Sloane had left the office, but couldn't figure out why he had directed- in just one look- so much malice toward his own secretary…

As Don entered Rooney's office, he mentally slapped himself on the forehead. He had forgotten that Rooney was only two or three years older than Miss Sloan. He had also forgotten that his senior year, Rooney had made almost as many trips to the principal's office as Don had himself- but only after Miss Sloane had been hired. Looking around Principal Rooney's office, Don noted the lack of family pictures. He also checked and was not surprised that Rooney did not wear a wedding ring. Sad, thought Don, that this man has lived the past twenty years with his obviously unrequited love for Miss Sloane. But, really, Don couldn't blame the principal for his desire- nor could he blame Miss Sloane for her lack of it.

Ward Rooney was anything but a great catch. He wore an expensive suit, but it hung wrong on his lanky frame. He did not look like he had put on any weight in the twenty years since Don had last seen him, but this was not a good thing. The man was just as boney as he had been when in his early twenties, his body screaming for the need for any sign of muscle. His arms and legs were just a little too long, while his hands were oversized. His head was large and extremely round, with the entire top covered with a toupee that was fit so well that Don only knew it was a toupee because, well, twenty years ago it had been more of a ill-fitted rug. The overall effect was almost like Boris Karloff, but not as attractive and without the personality.

As Rooney offered Don a chair, the principal sat back in his own leather office chair, behind his solid maple desk, subconsciously running his hands over several awards that sat on his desk, all the while eyeing his former student.

Don took off his glasses, relaxed in his chair, and then consciously ran his hands through his hair with enough force to make it clear that it was his own.

Rooney's hands stopped moving at the gesture, as he again scowled at Don.

"Well, Agent Eppes, I am glad you were able to come to speak to some of our students today."

"Thank, you, sir," replied Don, "And I don't mean to correct you, but it's Special Agent Eppes." Again, Don ran his fingers through his hair.

Rooney's right hand fluttered near his hair, as if checking to see if his toupee were on correctly. He lowered his hand when he saw Don's eyes were following his movement, then he straightened his tie and smiled at the agent.

"I have selected a small, lucky group of students to hear your speech today. I thought they would benefit the most- that they would relate to you more any of our other students. Of course, they may present you a challenge, but, you always liked challenges, didn't you?"

Don smiled.

"Always did- and still do- if my adversary is worthy. Don't think I've had a truly worthy opponent since middle school"- Don explained, making sure to place the time well before he had met Rooney, thereby denying he had ever been much of a challenge to him.

Rooney smiled in return.

"Well, then, you are overdue aren't you."

Rooney stood up, and Don followed. As they exited the principal's private office, Don noticed that Miss Sloane was now seated behind her desk in the outer office. Don went to stand near the outer office door, leaning against the doorjamb, waiting for further directions.

Rooney stood directly behind Miss Sloane, only inches from her back.

"Miss Sloane", Rooney directed loudly, "Please give Special Agent Eppes the number of the room in which he will give his speech, as well as the list of students who will be attending."

Rooney looked at Don with a smug look on his face. Speaking in a loud whisper, the lanky man leaned over the right shoulder of Miss Sloan, saying suggestively, "After that, I would like you to come into my office- I have a job for you to do." He was pleased to see the frown that crossed Don's face.

The tone and meaning of what Rooney had just said to her was not lost on Sloane. Angry, she took the paper with the room number and student names and crumbled it into a ball. She then tossed it at Don, purposely throwing it long, so it landed on the ground behind him. As he turned around and bent over to pick it up, he heard a loud whistle behind him. He turned quickly with paper in hand, and found himself looking into the smiling face of Miss Sloane.

"I remember your brother was great in mathematics, Donny," she said, giving the flustered agent her most-wicked grin. "Let's see how well you do with numbers- 555-2323."

Don was always great with that kind of mathematics, and easily memorized her phone number. Before he turned to go, he looked one last time at Rooney, whose face was flush with anger and frustration.

Don simply smiled, and as he walked out the door, he once again ran his fingers through his hair, enjoying the sound of Miss Sloane's laughter accented by the sound of Rooney slamming his door.