DISCLAIMER: ….I….DO…NOT…OWN…NARUTO….UNDERSTAND?
(But I do own my original concepts)
'never alone'
CH.4
When the woman had asked him what he knew about Kyubi he had said 'not much'. All he knew was that the Kyubi was the strongest of all demons and that it had attacked Konoha. The fourth hokage, his hero, had sacrificed his life to kill the demon and Konoha was saved. He had then asked her what that had had to do with anything.
He had wanted answers. Boy, did he ever get them.
Words could not describe what Naruto was feeling. Thinking in a detached manner once again, he considered the progress of the day's events. The outcome was not entirely unexpected. The Conclusion: today sucked bad….REAL bad. In a single day, he realized, his view of the world had been utterly shattered…
The mob burning his home and property, waking up inside some dungeon and having to wander for hours while in mortal fear for his life, and then finally meeting some woman that spoke to him through his thoughts….while INSIDE his brain ALREADY, and oh yeah the best one….
He was the container of the Nine-tail fox demon, the one that had attacked his home, Konoha, seven years prior.
Oh and don't forget…
The woman, the one that had seemed nice to him…and pretty to boot, the one currently standing in front of him crying, in what he had been told was her cage……..was the fox demon herself.
As the events circled through his mind over and over again trying to make sense out of all of it, one thought was prevalent…
Yep, today sucked….
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The woman, now known to be the demon Kyubi, looked down on Naruto as tears continued to fall from her eyes and her features conveyed her worry for her container. He didn't say anything to the news. In fact, his only reaction to the information at all had been to fall flat on his butt and to stare at her...or rather, through her, in a state of shock. She realized it had been one hell of a shock, even more so for a child of no more than seven years of age, but it was time he knew. The road ahead would not be a pleasant one, but if they were both to survive, the first steps had to be taken soon. He had to stand on his own to feet and learn to fight for himself. The mobs were evidence enough of that. She could only heal him so much at one time due to the seal and the level of harm they were promising? She didn't think she'd be able to grow back all of his limbs and digits, let alone his brain and heart. Yes, the first steps had to be taken soon. He just had to muster the will and strength to get up…
He was strong. She knew this first hand…After all; she had watched him all these years… through all the tears… and through all the torture…She'd been there, She'd seen it, and through him, she'd felt it…
It had made her want to die.
No, it wasn't the physical pain that affected her so. It was the emotional toll. Through out the years she had bonded with the boy. She had seen his first steps and heard his first words. She had seen him pick himself up and keep on going more times than she could count. She saw the unwavering honesty and integrity of character the boy possessed, the will to survive by his OWN way regardless of the world, and his deepest desire to receive acknowledgment. Even to demons, such traits were rare at so young an age. She didn't feel like his mother and she certainly didn't feel like his sister, but there was certainly a feeling there. It was that feeling that made her want to die…
It hadn't always been that way. In the beginning, when she first understood what had happened, she was angry. VERY ANGRY . Her vengeance on the arrogant ninjas had not only been stopped short, SHE'D been sealed! Into a human child of all things! Her power was trapped along with her form inside the prison of a babe… Despite her fury and blows against her prison she was trapped…
All she could do was sit back and observe…
With time, her perception changed. She came to understand the humans and realized that while she had been just in attempting to destroy the one that had committed an atrocity in order to gain the power and favor of a nine-tail lord, she had been entirely wrong in trying to massacre the village that he escaped into…
The first year of the child's life, by then she had learned his name was Naruto, was not entirely unpleasant. The time spent under the care of the Hokage was… enlightening. It was what had changed her opinion of the village. The Hokage was a wise and noble leader. He cared for his village and often spoke to Naruto. She appreciated the fact that he addressed Naruto not as herself but as his own being. The same could not be said for most of the others that came around the boy. Regardless, she learned what it meant to be shinobi from listening to the human and for that she was thankful.
Thereafter, however, her opinion of the village began to change back… With the coming of the orphanage incidents and the subsequent atrocities involved with torture and abuse in the village, she had vowed to reduce Konoha to ashes for the crimes against Naruto. Even her begrudging respect for the old man would not stop her…
What did change her mind was Naruto.
' I WILL BECOME HOKAGE AND THEY WILL HAVE TO ACKNOWLEDGE ME!' had been his words. The Kyubi reconsidered her position and made a new vow…She would help Naruto…It was the least she could do for him…
Yes, he'd been put through a hell that few demons, let alone humans, had ever had the misfortune to suffer in and yet he had persevered, if not thrived. Rather than drown in sorrow entirely, focus on revenge, or just lose himself to insanity…her had carried on. He had chosen his own path against all odds. To earn the love and respect of those that would wish him death. Naruto…Naruto was strong. She knew for a fact…
He'd make it.
She'd make sure of it.
But still, the absence of what might seem like a normal reaction was disturbing….'Perhaps' she thought 'I should try and get through to him inside his thoughts'.
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Naruto felt a slight tugging at his mind and realized it was the fox woman trying to communicate with him. Finally coming back into control of his faculties, he brought his now cold eyes up and bored into the Kyubi's own.
Seeing she had his attention, she gathered her wits and began to speak. " Naruto…I…I'm so sorry. I… never meant for all of this to happen to you. If…If I had known… I…" She was interrupted mid-speech by Naruto.
"YOU…YOU… YOU'RE SORRY?...YOU'RE SORRY?" Taking the time to glare as hard as he could directly into the eyes of the demon, the cause of his suffering, Naruto continued on while screaming. "YOU'RE SORRY! YOU WRECKED MY ENTIRE LIFE AND YOU'RE JUST SORRY!" Shaking and heaving as the tears fell down from his eyes to the floor , Naruto took one large gasp of air and began again. "You…you're sorry…? My whole life…for NOTHING...and you...you're sorry?" Falling back on the ground, now completely sprawled out, Naruto lay quiet as his chest heaved up and down. Silent tears streaked past his cheeks as he stared at the ceiling. Silence reigned for minutes only to be broken once again by Naruto….
"My whole life…I…thought…that I…that I had done something wrong. Something I couldn't remember, but something bad. My whole life I've thought that it's been my fault …that maybe I deserved it somehow…maybe in even a little way, but…but I was wrong." Naruto breathed in deeply and then cried out. "IT WASN'T EVEN MY DAMN FAULT AND THEY KNEW!" his breathing easing, the next few words came out as whispers. "They knew…the whole time ...and they still didn't care….' A few more moments passed. The demoness was considering things to say, but what could you say when you were the cause of such a life… She was saved with another question. "why?"
Thinking that he was referring to his last statements, she responded in a tired manner. "It's because of what I said before. In you they see me. The truth, the fact you have always been nothing more than an innocent, means nothing to them. My…my attack was …not merciful. I did many things that now…now I would never do. The fact is, they lost much and with out some outlet of vengeance they would lose their minds…you…you became their scapegoat. The source of all their ills. For their suffering at my hand as well as all that followed…..Naruto…I…I am truly sorry."
"No." Naruto stated firmly
Sadly, seeing the boy's hesitation to accept such a cruelty in life, Kyubi spoke. "No, I...am sorry Naruto. It is hard to understand, it's a harsh reality to face, but you have to under…"
"NO,I meant why did you attack?" Naruto asked aggressively sitting up and facing the woman, desperately seeking for any new ways to understand the situation.
For once, the fox demon found herself at a lost. She had not thought he would even care to ask for her reasons till he had been aware of her for quit awhile. Considering her choices and the knowledge at hand, she decided to inquire about is train of thought. "What, what do you mean Naruto? Why do you want to know why I attacked? I thought, I thought you'd be so angry you wouldn't even speak to me for ages…"
Naruto's eyes darkened considerabley as he spoke." Who said I'm not angry? You're a demon. You attacked my village. You ruined my life on all levels and have made everyone in my village loathe my as they would a devil. Angry? I way past that…but…" Naruto trailed off as his eyes softened into a sad spaced look.
"but?" the demoness asked somewhat wary from his earlier words but also somewhat…hopeful?
"your eyes…" Naruto said.
"What…what about my eyes?" the fox demon responded uncertainly. She was fully aware that her demonic visage, human form or not , disturbed many. 'Especially my eyes' she thought to herself. Somehow, the glowing crimson orbs she possessed made others naturally uneasy. In a battle it was great, the fear they could cause when utilized properly was amazing, but in normal conversation …they…'limited' her. Afterall, they're failry obvious, fairly unique…what with the slit that showed up every now and then, and most importantly, a tell tale sign of her demonic power. She could only wonder what he saw in them and so she waited…
"I can see the pain in them…when…when you said you were sorry for all that you've done. I … I don't want to believe you…but your…your eyes, they're different, but …they're the same as mine. I can see the loneliness …and sorrow…most of all though…I see regret…so…please…please just tell me why so I can undertand. You… you don't seem like the bloodthirsty killer I've seen pictures and heard stories about before…Earlier…when we first met…you…you could've attacked me when I was sitting against that gate there. You could've killed me then and there, but you didn't. From what I understand about the seal and from what you told me about it…if you had killed me, you would be in control of my body….once again…I …I need to know why you did it. I need to understand….please…" Finishing, Naruto stood and approached the gates. Coming to a stop, he put his hands on the bars and came close toward the Kyubi. He pleaded once more as the woman looked down and stayed silent. "please…"
Now caught completely and utterly off-guard, the Kybui just didn't know how to respond. It was the truth, yes. She could've killed him. Could've taken over when he neared…but she didn't. She could never do that to him…She looked down into his expectant eyes and saw a desperate desire for knowledge and understanding. Considering his words, she realized that even she on occasion was surprised by his maturity and strength of heart. Even through the shock and anger he was able to see that which was true before him…Taking a breath, she prepared herself for to tell a long story, a story of the beginning, of demon lords and clans long gone, of alliances and conflicts from an era gone by, of the death of her heart, of the passage of time, of the discovery of an atrocity, and finally of a final choice and its consequences for them both." Naruto-kun" she said," Take a seat, this is going to take awhile…"
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whooo, that took a lot to write for me. I tried very hard to try and come up with a compelling emotional scene. To be quite honest, it's hard trying to get this to work. The honest point is that a mother/son relationship is far more likely under the said circumstances than what I'm trying to write, but by the end of the next chapter it ought to work out fine. I'm happy that I've received some good reviews here and there. I got my first flame too (yippee) though it wasn't for this fic. It was for my little one-shot. I'll admit, the one-shot is horrible, but I was just writing for the sake of writing why listening to some music and it let me practice going through some motions. I might go back and redo it sometime. Anyways, back to this fic. Like I said earlier. I want it done right. SOOOO, it might take awhile. Good things come to those who wait, right? Well, in closing on my A/N for this chap I'll just say that I don't think I got any answerable questions….so..no question answering this one.yeah..I bet THAT sounded real smart. (smacks self upside head). Alright, well, my consciousness is starting to give out. Time for SLEEP. HOORAY! This is the madnarutofan signing off!
NEXT UP: HISTORY OF THE KYUBIS?
