Okay, there's a bit of a time gap between this and the last and a lot has happened, read carefully and I fill in all the gaps for you. You'll also have to remember some things from previous chapters towards the beginning. Hope I did okay and I hope that you enjoy it as always!
Chapter Twenty: I Cannot Lose You
She ran fast as she ever remembered running before, the sounds of the forest too small to be noticed even by her elven ears as she ran past. She moved quickly, knowing that if she did not he would catch her. At last she found what she sought and she ducked quickly into a small thicket and then sat with her arms folded pulled tightly around herself, trying to keep her breath quiet as she waited to see how long it would take him this time. She smiled, wondrously pleased for last time it had taken him nearly forty minutes. He said she was getting better, soon she would be just as good as him, maybe even better.
She didn't want to get better, just to become as good as he. It would seem wrong somehow to outdo her brother. After some time she laid back on the soft carpet of moss revelling in the warmth of the sun as it filtered through the thick branches above her. Then she heard it, footsteps. She sat upright and felt for the sword at her side for she knew the footsteps did not belong to her brother. Soundlessly she crept towards the edge of the thicket and looked out feeling relief wash over her as she recognised one of the new comers. They were always easy to spot for they seemed always to be watching and waiting for someone or something to spring out at them.
The stranger sighed and sat beneath one of the trees across the way and she could see his tears and felt strange for she had never seen anyone cry before, unless they were tears of joy, but these were different. Slowly, she crept out from her hiding spot soundlessly and walked towards him. He did not look up but seemed to sense her presence and drew his own blade immediately and lunged at her. She cried out in fear but remembered enough of her father's teachings to defend herself. She could see a strange fire in the elf's eyes as he froze looking at her, it was unlike anything she had ever seen before.
As soon as he recognised her he pulled back, seeming embarrassed as he began to apologize.
"Princess Carynthiel, please, I must beg your forgiveness but you startled me."
"Do not trouble yourself," she replied lightly, reminded once again of the strange seriousness that all the new comers seemed to lose eventually.
He sheathed his blade as did she and he returned to his place beneath the golden boughs of the tree. Without a word she sat down next to him.
"Why are you crying?" she asked quietly and he would not look at her.
"I am crying for those I've lost, Princess."
"Lost? Can you not just look for them and find them?" she wondered, confused by his sadness.
"Nay, my Princess, you misunderstand me. You have never been to Middle Earth, you have always dwelt here on these peaceful shores away from the darkness, away from the pain. Those I have lost are not somewhere I can find them, they have been killed. They are dead."
She sat silently for a minute trying to understand. She had been told about death, but it was something distant from here. She had never seen or felt death to know what it was like. The White Shores were always peaceful, there had not been wars for thousands of years since evil men were at last banished from the shores. Her father remembered it but it had been before even her brother's time and he was a good deal older than she. She felt useless as the elf began to cry again, there seemed to be nothing she could do.
"I am sorry," she said finally but her words seemed flat and empty. She felt her own tears began to fall as she realized how sheltered her life was and how limited her experiences had been. "I wish there were something that I could do for you."
The elf smiled at her sadly as he wiped her tears.
"May I tell you something princess that Lord Elrond told me once?" She nodded. "He said that between true friends, words are sometimes not needed, tears are enough."
She smiled as she heard her brother calling to her and turned to see his strong shadow advancing beneath the silver trees with golden boughs.
Saeorii sat up quickly and gasped for breath; her memories were returning. For hundreds of years, since the day she woke in the home of Lord Cirdan, they had remained dormant and now each time she closed her eyes they leapt before her. Their faces were all so clear now, her father, mother, brother and sister. Each of them that had been left behind on the White Shores. So many had come to them from Middle Earth, seeking refuge and an end to their pain and she knew not how to comfort them. She their princess could do nothing to ease the hurt of her people and so she had sailed, left the White Shores and come Middle Earth that she might know the pain they felt and better be able to help them.
She shuddered as the sounds of the battle around her struck her newly wakened ears and she knew why the memories had returned. So much had happened in the past weeks. That same night that Eomer and Eowyn agreed to come to Gondor, Ilterrin's messenger brought word from the White City that they were under attack. The Haradrim had caught word of the weakness of Gondor's king and sought to end its reign of terror. The king however had other ideas and before dawn the next day he and the Dunedain that were with him were ready to depart from Rohan.
They would not go alone though, Eomer would not hear of it. For centuries beyond the remembrance of a man, Rohan and Gondor had been allies so, said he, would they remain. Both he and Eowyn rode out, two of the Eoreds with them. The flags of Rohan and Gondor flew high above them as they readied to leave. It was then that she had gone to Elessar, then that she told him of her remembrances, then that she told him of what she knew, then she told him that she would not be left behind in Rohan. Though the voice of men caused her to flinch in fear she would not yield to the temptation to flee, nor would she allow him to ride into battle alone.
Faramir had come to Elessar's aid, insisting that she ride with him to Gondor. Legolas however was silent for some time before he spoke and he sided with her. She had looked at him and in that moment known that he would become the brother she had left behind for he saw that it would bring her more pain to stay behind than could ever be received on the battlefield. It was he himself who gave her the elven bow, once carried by Haldir Captain of Lorien, and that now stood by the door to her tent, ready to be let loose at a moments notice.
She heard familiar footsteps and immediately pulled herself to her feet as Elessar walked into the tent briskly, his mind obviously worried as he spread one of numerous maps out upon the small desk in the centre of their tent.
"What news is there?" she asked but feared his answer as he raked his fingers through his unkempt hair and bowed his weary head.
"It is not good. Faramir and his rangers are still a good way off and the soldiers from Gondor have yet to arrive. I fear that Eomer's men are waning, they have fought too long without rest. The Dunedain continue on but soon even they will lose their strength."
She drew close and wrapped her arms around one of his and rested her cheek against his shoulder, searching for something that might be said to ease his heavy thoughts.
"I remembered again," she stated softly for she had told him each dream as it came to her so that now he knew as much or as little of her past as she. "This time the dream wasn't about someone else, it was about me. I remember my name, and who I was."
He turned to her, obviously interested for until now all the dreams had revealed very little about herself, and much about those around her. Now that he stood watching her though, waiting for an answer, she felt timid to tell him.
"Please, Melleth, I wish to know," he whispered softly and brushed the back of his hand against her cheek soothingly.
"I was called Carynthiel," she told him softly. "Princess Carynthiel, of the High House."
For a moment he seemed incapable of speech as he looked at her in wonder.
"Adar told me he believed you to be of high lineage by your appearance and voice, but never had I thought," he paused before continuing. "Never had I thought you would have come from the highest of houses. Truly, you have more right to be Queen than I to be King."
"Oh, do not be foolish," she stated, blushing as she spoke, still unused to speaking to him so freely or in so playful a manner.
Both however were startled when someone burst quickly inside their tent. Immediately, Elessar stood straighter and stepped in front of her, shielding her body with his own.
"What is it," he demanded sharply, but the messenger was so frightened he seemed not to notice.
"The soldiers from Gondor are here, Prince Faramir and the Rangers are with them but," he paused seeming unsure of himself.
"What?" her husband cried out and she winced slightly.
"King Eomer has fallen."
Saeorii felt her stomach drop.
"What do you mean he has fallen?" Elessar asked more softly and she felt his fear and placed her hand on his arm.
"He is wounded. They are taking him straight to Gondor, the healers are going with him, they say there is no time to spare."
"Thank you," Elessar told him sadly and waved the boy out, turning his back to him.
Before either had said anything though, Faramir entered and the paleness of his face told that he had heard of the fate of the King of Rohan also. Saeorii stared off into nothing as the two spoke of things that she did not wish to know of. She had learned much about death during her time as a slave to men, but this was different somehow and she knew without asking this was what the elf she had seen that day so many years and so many leagues ago. It was different for she knew the King and he was now as close a friend as any she had aside from Elessar and Legolas. She felt a single tear drop onto her hand before she was shaken awake as the two with her strode briskly from the tent.
She knew where they were going, she did not have to ask. They were going to fight, to protect those they loved, they were going to face death. She stood for a moment unsure of what she should do until suddenly she realized that Elessar was going and her legs gave way beneath her and she fell to her knees hard. He was riding out and there was a good chance that he would never return to her. There was nothing she could do. She sat like this for some time as her body seemed to become numb before she realized that she was not helpless, there was something she could do.
She stood and removed her dress, groping through her massive trunk to find the hunting dress she had made Maeve make for her. It was fit well, the skirt made of two layers so that it would not interfere when she rode. She tied the front tightly so that it fit her like a second skin. She felt dizzy as she was struck with a flash of memory, going through the same actions so that she could go hunting with her brother. She leaned against the desk and put a hand to her head, taking deep breaths until the world around her came once more into focus. She turned and reached deeper into the trunk and pulled out black leather vambraces bearing the white tree and pulled them over the wine coloured sleeves of her dress before hauling on leather boots that ended just above her knees where they met the hem of her dress. Lastly, she pulled the front of her hair back and pinned it fast in the fashion of elven warriors before picking up her bow and quiver, and taking a deep breath, she stepped outside.
For a minute she blanched and stood still, so many men running here and there and the sharp sounds of battle nearer than she would have liked. She felt a chill as she listened to them calling out to one another and remembered her captors doing the same thing the day when Ilterrin had attacked and she had escaped. She faltered, so afraid that she could not move as everyone moved around her quickly, taking no heed of the warrior who stood staring off at nothing. None took her for who she was, none would have guessed her to be the Queen of Gondor for these were soldiers and were little seen in the palace and courts. Then she saw him and felt her heart begin to beat again as she raced towards him, trying to ignore the jolt of fear that shocked through her each time one of the soldiers bumped against her unknowingly.
"Legolas!" she called out to him and he turned, obviously searching for her face amid the sea of people.
She raced towards him, ducking beneath a horse while making sure that she did not lose his face. When she reached him he grabbed her arms and looked down at her sharply, obviously worried that something had happened to her.
"Saeorii, what is it?" he demanded quickly, looking her over for any sign of hurt and obviously confused when he found none.
"Where is Elessar?" she asked him earnestly and his confusion was doubled.
"He's gone to ready his men, they ride out at dusk, and he told me you knew."
"Yes, I did but he doesn't know that I am going with him."
Her words rendered her companion speechless and he led her gently aside, behind a nearby tent so that they could speak without shouting.
"What do you mean you are going with him?" he asked warily.
"I mean that I will not stay here, cowering in my tent, just as afraid as those who protect me as those who are attacking. I will not let him die, Legolas," she stated more forcefully than she ever remembered speaking with anyone since leaving the White Shores and noted his surprise in the sudden change in her manners. She felt hot tears falling as she finished. "He means everything to me, I cannot lose him. I can't be left alone again. Please, let me go to him," she pleaded; knowing that if anyone were to understand her it would be he.
"You know not how to fight, Cirdan told me that you refused to learn, and you wished only to heal and comfort, not bring pain and death."
"Cirdan was right, Legolas, and I have not drawn a sword or knocked and arrow since I came to these shores but I did before. My father and brother taught me, I am quite skilled and can defend myself quite well."
"Since you came to these shores? What in arda are you talking about Saeorii?"
"Legolas, I have not time to explain. Please, trust me, my brother."
He turned away from her for a moment and looked out at the grim faced soldiers who were headed off to battle and the many wounded who were returning and she could almost hear his mind racing in circles before finally he turned to look at her again.
"Alright. I will take you to him, but know that you will not convince Estel so easily as you have me," he cautioned before turning and beginning to weave his way through the crowds.
Saeorii began to follow and then realized that she did not have a horse and had no idea how she could get one. Her mount, Anduril, was here somewhere but she had no idea where to begin looking. She took a deep breath and walked timidly towards one of the generals who stood nearby, speaking with one of the Ranger captains.
"Pardon me," she spoke softly and neither heard her so she took a step closer and called up all her nerve and spoke in as commanding a tone as she could muster. "Pardon me, General."
This time they both heard her and turned towards her, obviously startled when they realized who it was for she spoke as little as possible to her husband's men and spent as little time among them as she possibly could. It was not that they were bad men who would harm her, but her fear kept her from getting any closer than necessary. Now she wished she had made more of an effort for she did not even know that man's name and silently promised herself that she would when this mess was over as the two before her suddenly stood to attention.
"Be at ease," she stated, more quietly now that she had their attention and they did so. "Please, General, I wonder if my horse could be brought to me."
"O-of course, your m-majesty," he stammered, obviously as ill at ease as she herself was or more and that made her feel some better. He called to one of the pages nearby. "You there, bring the Queen's horse to her at once and see that it is treated well."
The boy was immediately on his feet and off like a frightened rabbit.
"Thank you, General."
"Of course, your majesty."
"I wonder also if you might take me to the King? He left in such a hurry and I know not where to find him in all these men."
"Of course, your majesty," he answered, obviously still puzzled as he took Anduril's reins from the panting boy as he ran up. "Follow me please, your majesty."
She did so and was glad that she did for they walked some time before she could finally hear Elessar's voice drifting towards her on the evening wind. Soon after she saw him, standing next to Legolas, Faramir and Eowyn as they examined a map and then called out orders to the men standing waiting before them.
"Thank you, General," she stated softly some distance from her husband, knowing that she could manage the rest of the way on her own.
"Of course, your majesty," he answered, saluting sharply. "By your leave."
"Actually, I've one more thing to ask of you," she told him taking a deep breath to calm the birds that seemed to be flapping about in her stomach.
"Anything, your majesty."
"Your name."
"Pardon, your majesty?" he said softly looking puzzled.
"I cannot thank you properly if I do not know your name," she stated quietly, smiling shyly.
"Oh," he paused, glancing about as if he feared someone would hear. "My name is Nammin."
She smiled, "Greatest thanks, General Nammin," she stated inclining her head as she turned and walked towards her husband.
At first the men seemed annoyed as she tried to pass through and then she heard one whisper her name and they parted easily, greeting her stiffly as she passed, each one seeming afraid or in awe of her, or a little bit of both. Then they grew deathly still as she finally stood at the edge of the crowd and Faramir looked up, his jaw dropping slightly as she continued to walk towards them, having left her mount with one of the soldiers. He spoke hurriedly to Elessar who looked up as well and stood startled for a moment before walking briskly towards her.
"Melleth, are you well?" he asked urgently in elvish and she smiled up at him.
"Aye, all is well." She saw his unasked question and paused for a moment, looking down at her feet and gathering her courage before she answered. "I am going with you."
He seemed unable to comprehend her words and just stood staring at her for moments before it seemed finally to hit him.
"No, Melleth. I cannot allow you to go into such dangers. I cannot allow you to fight. I cannot lose you," he answered quietly but she heard the catch in his voice as he spoke the last and he reached out and gently cupped the side of her face.
She took at step closer, her eyes never leaving his and she felt tears once more as she reached out and lovingly brushed back his the unruly hair from his face.
"Nor can I lose you," she whispered and waited for his answer.
He sighed deeply and bowed his head so that his forehead rested against her own.
"You are going to be the undoing of me, Melleth," he told her tenderly before kissing her briefly and then leading her without a word to come and stand beside the others with him. Legolas shook his head, half smiling as Saeorii looked over at him, for he alone knew what they had said.
"Elessar!" she screeched and pulled hard on Anduril's reins. "Elessar!"
They had ridden out at dusk as they had planned and the tide of the battle had turned with the arrival of new allies. Those who were weary seemed to gain new strength and those who were fresh were eager to aid their brothers in arms. She had ridden out at his side, her bow feeling familiar in her hands as they rode closer and closer, standing atop the hill for a moment and surveying the situation below before the horn was sounded and they raced down towards their enemy. In Elessar's hand Anduril played beautiful music as it burned with the flame of the setting sun while her bow sang at his side. They had fought all through the night and now, just as they grey dawn was breaking and the enemies of Gondor were fleeing he had fallen.
She raced back towards him, pulling back her bow as she watched him fall hard from the faithful Brego who stood at his master's side. The Haradrim soldier raced towards him, his sword, already stained with Elessar's blood, ready to deal the final blow. Quickly, she drew back her bow and released one of the white-feathered arrows to find its mark. The soldier looked up at her for a moment before he fell, dead, at Elessar's side. She felt her heart pounding with fear as she leapt from her horse's back and moved to kneel at her husband's side. She carefully turned him over and cringed when she withdrew her hand and found it tainted with his blood. The sword had gone deep, it's master's arm true and she pulled him against her as red life flowed from his side.
"Elessar. Elessar, speak to me, please," she pleaded as she brushed the hair from his pale face.
He coughed roughly and moved slightly in her arms as she stroked his cheek. His eyes opened and he smiled faintly when he saw that it was she who held him.
"Melleth, I am glad you are here," he stammered, pain razor sharp in voice as he coughed again and his eyes began to close once more.
"No!" she cried. "Elessar, please, you can't leave me."
She felt her chest tighten and she began to sob as she cradled him against her as she had that first night when she had gone to the broken king. Slowly, his eyes looked up at her and she bit her lip as she saw they were dull with pain. Painfully, he reached up his massive hand and held it against her face as he brushed her cheek tenderly with his thumb, adoration reflected in his silver eyes as he looked up at her and her dress grew wetter with his blood.
"I-I l-love y-ou-ou, Me-lleth," he stammered and his voice was soft with pain as her tears washed the blood from his palm.
"No," she murmured quietly as she watched him turn his head so he could look up at the sky, now golden with the light of dawn.
"I-I c-can hea-r the w-wind, it's so beaut-iful," he murmured softly and breathed as deeply as his wound would allow.
King Reyson had heard the pained cries of a lady and rode towards them, his men were retreating and the soldiers of Gondor and Rohan were more concerned with them than he so he walked unnoticed closer towards the voice. He felt as if he had been struck when finally all the soldiers had passed him and he saw the ones he was searching for. A mighty looking warrior lay, badly wounded, cradled in the arms of the most beautiful creature he had ever seen. They spoke to one another in a tongue he could not understand as he drew closer and saw her tears as the man reached up and touched her face lovingly.
He felt a lump in his throat as he saw the white tree upon the man's breast and knew that he was the king. This was the terrible King Elessar who neglected and starved his people? It was then he realized he'd made a horrible mistake. He had been confused when he sent word to Gondor that he had come to save them from Elessar and the messenger returned with word that if he attacked, Gondor would be forced to return blow for blow. He had not understood when he came to the field of Pelennor and saw not only the flag of Gondor but that of Rohan as well. Now he knew why, this was not a terrible man, he had been wrong. So much bloodshed due to his quick temper. He should have tried to speak with Elessar himself before attacking but his fierce Haradrimian temper would not allow it and now, their king lay dying.
He watched as the king looked up at the sky and spoke quietly while the lady who held him pleaded with him as she stroked his face tenderly and washed away his blood with her tears. He stood unable to turn away as the king turned and looked up at the lady one last time and he could see the love in the man's eyes and knew for certain he had made a mistake. The lady spoke one last time before the king's eyes slid closed and his hand fell limp at his side, no longer able to caress her smooth face as his head lolled back. He stepped towards her as she pulled the king to her breast and shook with silent sobs until suddenly she sensed his presence and looked up at him.
His heart stopped when he saw her face, never had he seen anything before that so wrenched his heart as the broken expression on her face, or the hollow emptiness in her dark eyes. Tears made small paths through the blood that now marred her flawless face. The wind blew gently as if to comfort her and blew the wisps of hair that had escaped her pin across her face, making her seem all the more a lost and forlorn child for he had seen more years than most kings. His heart broke at the sight of her and he would not have moved except for the voices that lashed out at him as several soldiers raced towards him. With them were a lord, a lady and an elf.
The elf rushed to the lady who held the fallen king, reaching for the fallen man. The soldiers formed a wall between he and the king, a look of fierce protectiveness plain on their weary faces. The man knelt at the king's side but the lady stalked angrily towards him and he longed to turn away but his guilt kept him in place.
"King Reyson, be gone from this place! How dare you linger here where you have caused so much blood to be shed."
He took a step back as she held her sword in front of her, her pale eyes blazing in anger.
"I did not know. Please, forgive me I," he stammered before he was interrupted by the lord who knelt at the king's side.
"Eowyn! He is alive! Hurry, he hasn't much time!"
The lady looked behind her before turning to glare at him once more before running back to them. The soldiers did not move although he longed to get past them and help the king if he could but he dared not for they looked as though they wished to kill him. A horse was brought and the elf moved to it quickly, the king held easily in his arms as the lord helped him to get the king up on the horse before the elf swung up quickly behind him.
"Ride, Legolas, ride with the speed of the wind," the lord called but the elf needed no urging as he raced towards the White City that shone in the distance.
The fierce lady walked towards the lord who stood waiting with another horse, the dark lady walking unsteadily at her side, the front of her dress stained with the blood of the king. Suddenly, without warning the dark lady collapsed and the lord raced to her and scooped her small form up in his arms.
"General Nammin," the lord called and one of the soldiers turned towards him.
"Yes, Prince Faramir."
"I want you to stay with Princess Eowyn. Do not leave her side until she is safe within the city gates. I will take the Queen back with me."
Reyson's stomach dropped as he looked more closely at the limp figure in Prince Faramir's arms and realized that she was the Queen of Gondor. He took a step towards them but was soon surrounded by Gondorian soldiers.
"Do not kill him," called the Princess Eowyn as she walked towards him once more and he wondered what reason there was to spare his life now. She looked hard at him, her blade still in her hand and he found that he could not meet her gaze. "Be gone from here, for if you return I will not spare you my blade," she growled fiercely and he stood there numbly for a moment, unable to understand what she had said. He saw a flicker or warmth enter her eyes as he spoke next before she turned and began walking towards the city.
"What have I done?" he murmured. "What have I done?"
To be continued…..
