Whoa. Kill me now. It's been SO long. I just got my computer fixed though. I read over this story and I realized I don't really like it that much but I WILL continue. If anyone is actually still reading this thing.
I'm sorry this is rushed but I just wrote it today. I thought I better update ASAP.
Have fun.
By the way, it may be a little different than usual because I can't remember where I want to go with this story.
CHAPTER 11
"James Potter?" A timid voice behind James startled him.
"Whaa?" He asked groggily, still tired from yesterday, putting down his half eaten toast and turning around.
"I'm sorry." In James' mind there was nothing better than hearing those earnest words from Lily Evans that morning.
"You're what?" He asked unbelievingly.
"I'm sorry." She said louder. Lily blushed slightly, which was the most emotion anyone had seen from her in a long time. "I'm sorry I yelled at you when you were trying to help me."
"That's- that's nice." James said uncertainly. Unwillingly they had attracted the attention of the house table and he wasn't quite sure how he should act.
"Well…ok. Just wanted to let you know and now…I'll be off." Lily turned to walk away.
"Wait." He stood up. "Evans…er, Lily. There's room here – if you want to sit here, I mean." He pointed to room between his seat and Sirius.
Lily hesitated for a moment and looked at the other Marauders.
Remus watching them curiously. Sirius smiling kindly. Peter looking uncertain.
Then she looked towards the rest of the hall.
Faces watching anxiously. The females hoping this wouldn't happen and the males hoping they would just start fighting again so they could see some action.
"No thanks. I…better get started on my potions essay."
She couldn't do it.
Lily Evans, you are a coward.
WITH JAMES
James stood still for a moment before sitting back in his seat quietly.
"At least she acknowledged you willingly, Prongs." Sirius smiled encouragingly.
"Yeah, yeah I guess." James nodded.
"You can't expect her to be ok all at once." Remus, the everwise, spoke.
"I know. Well, at least we're making progress." James bit into his toast. "I'm sure she's coming round to me."
An aging wizard watched merrily as the scene wound down.
"You see Minerva. It is already working."
"Albus, do you really think that Miss Evans will be back to her self now?"
"All in good time. But for now, she has made the first step."
SCENE CHANGE
And, as Dumbledore predicted, Lily did start to get better. She still remained quiet but she started to show signs of the spitfire that the school had just got to know the year before.
"Evans, will you pass the salt?"
"Get it yourself, Potter. You're closer, you lazy git." Lily replied with a smile.
"Ah uh Evans, watch it." James replied with a grin that could melt a statue.
"The only it around here is you, Potter. And if you don't mind I'd rather not watch you, it hurts my eyes." She smirked before walking off, leaving a deliriously happy James Potter in her midst.
Although, sometimes Lily was still seen wandering the halls, as though lost, with nothing at all to do.
"There she is again Remus." Peter pointed out to his friend.
"I know," Remus replied, as they watched the lonely Lily Evans watch a group of friends longingly. "But what can we do? Ally was her best friend."
"I think maybe I can help." James said standing up.
"I think maybe you'll make it worse." Sirius said gloomily, pulling him back down. "Nothing anyone can say makes it better."
As the weeks rolled by Lily started to show some oomph that had once had people running for cover. Although sadness still plagued her, she started to feel better about herself. More cheerful. She actually ventured outside when she wasn't doing head duties or studying. She even went to Hogsmeade (alone, to James' regret) and started piping up in class.
Lily was coming back. And that made James Potter very happy.
SCENE CHANGE
"Evans, sit here!" James yelled from his end of the table.
"No thanks, Potter. I've seen how you eat and I'd rather not be covered in my dinner." This had become routine at dinner time. Also at lunchtime. And, lets not forget, breakfast time.
"Oh well, maybe tomorrow then."
"Probably not." Sirius smiled at James.
"She'll come around." James laughed slightly nervously, ruffling his hair. "Just give her time."
"Sure, Prongs. Sure."
"Hey," Peter said quietly, "Who is that?"
"Where?"
"There." The three other Marauders turned to look where Peter's grubby finger pointed.
"Looks like Lily has a new buddy." Remus pondered, as the group watched a blonde girl walk over and sit with Lily happily.
"Looks like it." James said, contemplating whether this would help or hurt him.
"Uh oh. Looks like she has another new friend." Sirius said watching James closely.
"Huh?" James snapped out of his thoughts. "What the hell?" He demanded as they saw a male specimen join the two girls.
"Who is that?" Remus asked.
"It looks like that Hufflepuff bloke." Sirius snapped his fingers. "Bert…Bert somethingarather."
But a low growl from James answered the question for them.
"Snuff. Bert Snuff."
WITH LILY
Lily smiled slightly as Angelina Snuff sat down across from her. They had talked earlier in the library, but Lily didn't think it would be a reoccurring thing.
Angelina talked about her summer and how Lily should sit with her sometimes at lunch. Also, Angelina talked of how she was glad that Lily stood up to James, and how she had felt betrayed when James had broken up with her in forth year.
Lily sighed. Another one of his conquests.
"Bert!" Angelina yelled at her brother. "Over here!"
"Coming." The strapping Hufflepuff lad grinned and walked over. "Hey Lily, haven't talked to you in a while."
Lily laughed inwardly at the truth in this statement, as he hadn't talked to her since first year, and made room for him to sit down.
"How have you been?" He asked soothingly, as though she were a wounded animal.
"Fine. I've been fine." Lily strained a smile.
"Bert, can't you see she doesn't want to talk about that." Angelina shut him up.
"Ok, but Lily, if you ever need to talk I'll be here." He smiled.
"Excuse him," his sister shook her head, "he's studying psychology. He's been picking everyone's brain lately."
"I don't mind." Lily said, waving it off. She had to talk about Ally sometime she guessed. Although she had never picked Bert for the psychiatrist type. He had always seemed quite mean and cruel to her. Maybe she had judged him unfairly. "Some other time maybe."
"Sure."
"So, Lily, how about you sit with us tomorrow morning?" Angelina asked. "The more the merrier at the Hufflepuff table."
"Um…I guess." Lily nodded happily. Maybe she wouldn't be so lonely anymore.
SCENE CHANGE
"Calm down James. They were just talking." Remus warned.
"Why was she talking to him though? Why not me?"
"He sat beside her, Prongs. There wasn't much she could do." Sirius laughed.
"He did, didn't he? He was always like that."
"I always thought that guy was a bit of a git." Sirius contemplated. "He was never very happy to see me, which is unusual. In fact he was quite rude about it."
"I remember that." Remus said nodding. "He didn't treat anyone very well back then, mind you. Remember he always used to snap and hurt people."
"Quite a way with words, though." Sirius said vaguely. "Some of the things he said to us I would never have thought of. Knew exactly where to get you, he did. Until we pranked him. That shut him up. Stupid git."
"Maybe he's different now." Remus added. "We've all matured since then." He looked pointedly at James.
"He's dangerous. I don't like this. Not at all. I bet this was all part of his plan. I bet he's been harboring feelings for her since first year." James said darkly.
"First year?" Sirius asked perplexed.
"Didn't you know? They hooked up. For all I know they shagged and he's been in love wither ever since. Maybe he's going to slip her a love potion."
"Geez Prongs. First year? What have you been doing, recording a list of everyone who has ever had any physical contact with the girl?" Sirius backed away from him a little.
"They just kissed James. You were even there." Remus shook his head and turned to Sirius. "Remember the first year truth or dare game?"
"Oh yeah. Good times. I lost my lipginity there." Sirius smiled at the memories. "Alexis Saunders, I won't forget you."
"Sirius, stop now. If you start on about lipginity again I'll have to bite you." James snorted.
"Don't think about Lily and Snuff now, Prongs. We have pranks to plan. I bet they won't even talk again."
SCENE CHANGE
"Lily! You didn't forget did you?" Angelina tugged Lily over to the Hufflepuff table.
"No…er…I just didn't see you." Lily laughed. She hadn't thought they'd remember.
"Come on. Bert saved us a seat." Angelina sat down. "So what have you got first?"
"Potions." Lily said, biting into an egg.
"Slughorn, eh?" Bert screwed up his nose. "Me too."
"I don't see how you two can take that class. Potions was like another language to me."
They all laughed and Angelina shared stories of her horrifying potions.
Maybe this won't be so bad after all, Lily though as she listened.
SCENE CHANGE
"Where is she?" James scanned the table.
"Not awake yet?" Sirius tried, but he had seen something James hadn't.
"Hey," Peter joined them, "Why is Lily over-"He was silenced by Remus standing on his foot. But it was too late. The damage was done.
James started at the three talking at the Hufflepuff table and let out a small hiss. He narrowed his eyes sourly and stalked off; looking much like Snape did continuously.
SCENE CHANGE
"Hello class." Slughorn beamed. "How are we all?" He walked around the cauldrons.
"Today we'll be brewing draft of delight. Instructions in your books. Hop to."
The class turned their pages and hurried to gather ingredients.
"Psst…Lily." Bert whispered from behind her. Lily took a moment to notice that he was not in his usual seat, before dropping in her doxy droppings and turning to him.
"Yes?"
"Would you be able to help me here? I can't get these mangoes right."
"Sure." Lily said, leaving to potion to simmer as instructed, and joining Bert behind his cauldron.
Across the room a furious James watched the two laugh about something he couldn't see.
"James," Sirius interrupted - he and James were the only ones taking Potions that year of their friends. "Stop glaring. It's good she's getting new friends. It's good she's talking to someone."
"I know." James sulked. "I just wanted that someone to be me."
SCENE CHANGE
That week seemed to be particularly stressful on the Marauders, as the more time Lily spent with the Hufflepuff two, the more James scowled and sulked.
The other three Marauders thought he was being unreasonable but James just didn't like that Bert guy. He thought him suspicious. He didn't trust him one bit.
"Lily!" Angelina screamed. "You can't do that!"
Lily looked at her questioningly. "I think I can."
"No way." Life with Angelina seemed to be a whir of exclamation marks and outbursts. Lily liked her, sure, but she was a bit…off, for her taste.
She missed Ally. A part of her always would. She was having a bad day that day and she missed her more than ever. But also, she missed Gryffindor. Hufflepuff was fine but Gryffindor was where she lived. Where she loved it.
"Listen, Ange, I know how to play Wizard chess." Lily smirked. After all, she had beaten James Potter at it.
"So do I! And I know you can't do that!"
"Why not?"
"Because I don't want to play." Angelina suddenly tipped over the board. Lily sighed at her childishness. Ally would never do that.
Lily silently hit herself. Stop comparing her to Ally. Ally is gone.
Angelina walked over to the lake and beckoned Lily. Lily stayed still. She hadn't been close to the lake since. She couldn't.
"Come on Lily!" Angelina yelled. "Get over here. We can play with the squid."
"I'm fine, thanks." Lily shook her head.
"C'mon. Face your fears." Angelina snickered but left Lily to sit with Bert.
SCENE CHANGE
"I'm going to kill him." James growled.
"Calm down, Prongs." Peter said scared.
"I'm going to rip him limb from limb and toss them into the lake."
"I'm taking a walk." Sirius said suddenly.
"What's wrong with him?" James asked quietly.
"Lake? C'mon James." Remus said drained. "Lily has got you all worked up. Sirius lost someone too. He needs a friend right now. I know you were there for him just as much as you were for Lily but now you're being quite selfish."
"I am, aren't I?" James said hitting his head. "I'm going to go see if he wants to play some Quidditch."
SCENE CHANGE
"Ready or not, here I come." Remus called as the others scampered away hiding.
It was Saturday and the Marauders were playing Marauder hide and seek -which, for some reason, involved a lot of eggs, six yo-yos and four cooked chickens.
"Shh! He'll find us." Sirius said, holding his chicken between his knees and ducking around a corner.
"I'm being quiet." James said, his chicken down his shirt. "Time to split up, Padfoot."
"Watch out, Prongs. I'm gunna get you." Sirius smirked as they parted.
James walked down the ground hallway, watching his back and front the whole time, before biting his chicken and hiding it in a suit of armor.
Now, where shall I hide? He thought excitedly looking outside. Where to go…
A scene by the lake caught his eye and he came to a halt by the window. He couldn't hear anything but the actions spoke volumes.
SCENE CHANGE
"Lily! Get over here!" Angelina yelled. "It's so hot. Let's go swimming!"
Lily stood frozen beside a tree.
"Lily! Come on!"
"You don't have to Lily." Bert came up beside her and rubbed her shoulder relaxingly before turning on his sister.
"Can't you see he doesn't want to be there?" Bert said angrily. "She's obviously still feels the trauma of loosing her friend. That would just remind her."
"I...I'm g-going to…go." Lily stammered and hurried away into the castle, only to collide with a Mr James Potter inside.
"What are you doing Evans?" He tried to keep the bitterness out of his voice.
"I…need to go study. Move Potter." She hardened her voice. She realized how long it had been since she had talked to Potter. Quite long actually. Her voice wasn't used to picking up anger this fast.
"Your Huffly friends are that way." He pointed outside. "Why don't you join them?" This time the bitterness broke through, and his voice actually cracked slightly.
Lily looked out the window to see the two arguing softly.
"I have to go, Potter. Move." She demanded.
"Or what?" He raised his eyebrows.
"Or I'll have to use magic." She pulled out her wand.
"Don't make me hex you, Evans." He said playfully, pulling out his wand too.
Lily looked out the window and saw Bert throw his hands in the air and start towards the castle.
"Please Potter." She put down her wand and stared at him pleadingly. "I need to go. Please understand me."
James looked at her for a moment, he felt himself softening. Her eyes were clouded and he had a feeling this was the most honest she had ever been with him. He then looked to the window and saw Bert coming closer.
"Go then, Evans." He said harshly. "I'll keep your boyfriend away for a bit. I can see you two have had a fight." He stepped aside and allowed her to pass.
"Thank you." She whispered, not bothering to correct him. She looked at James again, before hurrying off.
James watched her go and felt his heart clench slightly. So they are dating. He knew it all along.
Bert pushed open the door and came face to face with a very angry Potter lad.
"Potter." He greeted.
"Snuff." James spat, not bothering to disguise his hatred.
"Care to move?" Bert asked tiredly.
"Not really."
"I need to get inside." Bert said, anger creeping into his tone.
"Evans doesn't want to see you."
"And she told you this, did she?" Bert asked.
"Yes." James smiled smugly.
"I highly doubt that. I doubt she'd even bother talking to you."
"What is that supposed to mean?" He snarled, raising his wand.
"It means that Lily wouldn't even bother to talk to you lately. She hates you, Potter. Get it through your head." Bert smiled sensing a weak point. "And I know that kills you so."
James narrowed his eyes, daring him to speak.
Challenge accepted.
"What? You didn't think I noticed?" Bert laughed cynically. "You don't think I can feel your glares on me every time I'm around her? You didn't think I could see the way you watch her? Save it Potter. I'm training in psychology; I notice things. I see the way you look at her."
James let out a slight growl, but he felt his defense weaken.
"Others may not notice it but I do. You simply adore her, Potter, don't you?" He smirked. Somehow he made the words sound disgusting. "And do you want to know the best thing? " He continued. This was his shot to do something he had wanted to for a long time. Get back at that arrogant sod James potter. "She wouldn't even look twice at you. She will never love you. To her you are nothing." He poked James in the chest. "Now you know what my sister felt like when you destroyed her heart. What all those people felt like."
James stepped away from him and Bert brushed past him. He may have been bigger and more talented than Bert, but what he had said had struck him, and he suddenly felt weaker than a first year.
"Hey Potter!" Bert called after he had walked down the hall. James turned to him. "Hurts, doesn't it?"
As Bert disappeared James slid down against the wall. Is that what all those girls felt like when he had left them? He would never wish this upon anyone.
"Hurts, doesn't it?"
Like my heart has been ripped out.
SCENE CHANGE
"Lily?" A quiet voice called as he stepped into the room Lily sat in.
Damn, he found me. Lily hissed in her head. She wiped her tears on her sleeve.
"Lily, don't cry." Bert sat beside her. "I'll talk about it with you. You need to mourn."
"No thanks." She sniffed.
"C'mon Lily."
"No thank you, Bert." She said defiantly.
"Talk to me Lily." He urged. "How do you feel? Do you feel grief? Anger? Hatred? Tell me what's running through your mind." He stood up with her.
"I don't want to talk about it." Lily said forcefully.
"You need to."
"Don't tell me what I need to do. I want to go." She said loudly and turned to go. Bert grabbed her arm.
"You're going to tell me what is on your mind. You need this Lily, I can help you."
"I don't want your help." She yelled in his face.
"You will get it. Stop being so ungrateful. Just because your friend died doesn't mean you can go around being all depressed and angry. Move on Lily. I can help you with that."
"Let me go." She spat.
"No."
"Let me go."
"No. Stop being such an ungrateful child." He glowered.
Lily slapped his face hard.
"You bitch." He hissed. "I'm trying to help you out and you slap me?" He shook so roughly she almost lost her breath. "Snap out of it!"
"Remus?" A voice interrupted them and they heard the door opening. "James? Pet-" Sirius Black stopped in his tracks and took in the scene at hand.
"What the hell is going on here?" He demanded furiously.
SCENE CHANGE
"Prongs! There you are." Remus walked over to him. "Sirius is in and he'll find you there."
James sat silently.
"James?" Remus asked worriedly.
"I'm so sorry, Remus. I didn't…I didn't know. I didn't know I hurt them so much."
"What's going on James?" Remus asked.
"Lily…she…and Snuff…"
James poured out what had happened. What Snuff had said. What he had felt.
"James, you can't listen to him." Remus said angrily.
"You don't understand, Remus. He was right. About all of it."
SCENE CHANGE
"I said, what the hell is going on here?" Sirius demanded again, snarling.
"Mind your own business Black." Bert yelled. "I'm helping Lily out here."
Sirius looked to Lily's shaken, crying body. "It doesn't look like your helping her out. I think you should let her go."
"Get lost. I'm talking her through her problems." Lily whimpered as her held her arms tightly.
"You're going to have a big problem soon if you don't let her go." Sirius said, drawing his wand.
"Piss off, Black. I'm talking her through her grief of her dead friend."
"Don't you ever talk about Ally, you piece of Scum." Sirius roared.
"This is between Evans and I. We're discussing-"
What they were discussing Sirius would never know, because he cut him off with a roar of "STUPEFY!"
As Bert fell to the ground Sirius caught Lily and pulled her into a tight embrace.
"C'mon, Evans. Let's get you to the hospital wing."
Lily nodded and walked with him, tears still falling.
"Prongs?" Sirius asked as they approached what appeared to be James and Remus talking.
"Later." Remus nodded and shooed them past.
"What's wrong with him?" Lily sniffed as she and Sirius passed James, who was sitting on the ground, his head in his hands, being talked to by Remus.
Remus looked up.
"I think he's just had his heart broken."
