The next morning...
Pacey woke up in confusion as he heard laughter spread across the apartment. He smiled as he looked next to him to find Joey not there. He grabbed his clothes as he quickly put them on but he looked at the table next to him to see a note.
Pacey,
Last night was ... incredible. Actually more than incredible. You were right, no matter what season we are in a never-ending disaster thing called life. You come into my life and til sweep me off my feet. I don't know you do it.
Last night, I saw you and Jacob laying there. I could see you and me in the future. I don't know to explain it other than I want that. I want to keep seeing you and Jacob or you and Oliver. For years, I always imagine what it would be like if I just went to you, and as I watch Dawson sign those papers. I realize that I could have left a long time ago, not for you but to feel happy again.
You came into my life and you continue to make me feel alive. The way you brushed my hair last night and smile at me gently last night. The way you still made sure I was ok last night. The way you and I fall asleep and I woke up sore and for the first time in a long time, it was for an amazing reason.
I'm not saying let's get married and have kids right away. But what I am saying is Pace, I still need you, all of you. I need the touch of you and the words you say. I need to continue to feel asleep because Pacey, I can't keep running from you. No matter where we go we just keep coming back to one another and if I keep running then I'm going to get the motivation that's it alright to keep doing that.
What would that teach my children? That's it ok to keep running from the people you once love that letting yourself fear over things will be alright? That if you love someone you should not say anything and let them leave their life without you in it. It's not even that Jacob is at the age where he has all the big dreams and one parent is teaching them what it is like to go away suddenly. I can't do that to him. I can't teach him to run around.
I still need you, Pacey. Forever and always. I know it's too soon in a lot of ways. I heard at the store yesterday that you and Hannah, was it? Broke up. So, maybe I am the reason for that and I'm truly sorry if I am. But I don't know how soon it would be to start completely dating after Dawson and I and after you and Hannah. But Pacey, Take me out. I don't care where you and I, tonight night at 7. The kids will be at Dawson's. If we aren't meant to be then tonight will go wrong. But if you and I are still meant to be together then I will see you then.
Don't walk out the door before eight, I don't want Jacob or Oliver to see you. It's better this way, one thing at a time. I don't want Jacob to go scream this to Dawson.
Your truly,
Joey
Pacey smiled as he walked over to a printer and grabbed a sheet of paper and a pen.
Joey,
When I was twenty-five I open the Creek house, I was so nervous. It was the first time I ever put myself out there just to put myself out there. To be quite honest, it wasn't like me. I was making myself well known that I know how to cook and to be honest I was scared I would end up poisoning someone on accident because well... I'm known to be a screw-up.
But there once was another time, that I put myself out there and that was to be with you. I was seventeen, and I pull over on the side of the road and I kissed you. You didn't say anything for a moment and I was getting overwhelmed with excitement till you started pushing and yelling at me.
But in the end, you saw me, and right now, here I am sitting in the guest's bedroom of your apartment while hearing laughter from you and your children, I know now that I have a great business and haven't poison anyone yet. I also know one thing, Jo. I am ok with messing up because, in the end, I want you to be happy.
I don't really mind with who, I would love for it to be me. We have tried so many times to work on this and I don't mean to be a Debbie downer but what I am saying if we don't work out at we tried. But like you said, there is this future ahead of us.
I have always loved you. I probably always will. I have seen our future and I cut my thoughts off whenever I think about it because you and I weren't together for fifteen years. But last night, I felt it as well.
I felt the way, your body curves. The way you smiled up at me as I push your hair out of your face to look at you. The way you smirk at me as slowly suck on your nipples. The way you moan my name, the way you just know how to turn me on. I still feel like that eighteen-year-old boy who is smiling at his girlfriend for the first time.
I still feel like that seventeen-year-old boy who got excited while the girl he loves is explaining she wants to come with him. I still feel like that six-year-old boy who pushes you off the swing set because I was told by Dawson that I was looking at you in a funny way as in a way that implies that I like you. I was like no way, but deep inside I knew I like you. I have always know my feelings for you are what keep me going.
Maybe we are both wrong but I would love for you and me to go out and see.Because Jo. I would love to see where you and I go. Like you said we are talking about marriage or kids here. However, I am hopeful that I can pick you and take you out. Because six years old me would have been shocked while seventeen years old me would have been dying over the fact of how damn gorgeous you still look like Godly woman.
I love you, Jo. Forever my heart has fallen back to you and I hope this time we are an always. No Hannah, No Dawson, nobody else. Just you and I forever and always in one another's arms.
Love,
Pacey
